Wednesday 4 June

[Loppy lugs]

Morning all, another dripping dawn but I'm glad to be back.

Have been a little bit all over the place since I hit the 30 day mark but still determined to keep going. Loads of different issues seem to be coming to the surface.

Have been reading some of the past days to see how you have all been getting on.

Janice, it must be such a stressful and worrying time. Wishing you well and admiring your strength.

Becks, Hope the house is looking good and that you don't have too many surprises when you come to unpack.

Reteacher, glad that you are doing better and have some good coping strategies, I might borrow a few.

Dt, Sounds like you have escaped the post holiday blues. The only way I can ever avoid them is to book another holiday.

DG also sounds like you are doing well at the moment. The course at the weekend was really interesting. I will definitely start saying what I really think from a much earlier stage. I shall be banning "whatever's best for you" from my vocabulary. Instead I will say something like "I would prefer xxxx but on this occassion I am happy to go along with you" So that I stop misleading people that I am fine with something when I am ok-ish but not happy.

He has a website Claude Steiner's Home Page: where a couple of his books can be downloaded for free. I haven't yet read the one on alcoholism but know he has done a lot of work in this field since the 1970's.

To all who follow and everyone I haven't mentioned hope you have a great Wednesday and achieve all your objectives.

[Seen the light!]

Wednesday 4 June

Morning Loppy Lugs and everyone to follow

I've not posted for a fair few days but I'm never far away - I'm always having a quick read when I can! I've set myself a target to stay AF for the whole month of June so am so far on the start of Day 4. Isn't it amazing how good you feel after just a few days? I've heard someone before describe it as the fog lifting and that's just how it feels!

I feel different this time - I hope the feeling lasts but I am calmer (not feeling panicky) and not as anxious as I have been. I have a party on Saturday with all my friends (who drink just as much as me but see nothing wrong with it!) and I'm not fazed by it - I will go and plan to have a good time without AL! Before I would have been scared of going, trying to think of excuses not to go or just resign my self to the fact that I would go and I would drink! Don't feel like that this time and it feels great!

Best go now and start getting ready for work - does anyone know what's happened to wantrealmeaning? And Doggygirl good to see you back - your posts stuck in my mind when I first joined in March

Have a great day everyone xxxxxx

[Pamina]

Wednesday 4 June

Morning Loppy, STL and all to come!

A ray of sunshine finally breaking through here in London.

Loppy - your course sounds interesting. Well done on the 30+ path despite the ups and downs!

STL - it's great that you're calm about the meet with your friends. I went to a house party with a bottle of low-cal tonic water, and after the few initial questions, nobody gave me any hassle. It was actually a lot easier than I had thought.

I passed my 'habit forming' 3-week mark yesterday so have been thinking about habits. I got fed up with my weight in April and started paying attention to breakfast (among other things). I now have my bowl of porridge every morning religiously, and can't really imagine the day without it.

As for drinks, I still have a drinking habit, it's just not AL. I've had AF beers on social occasions and last night I sat here with a Ribena. I was annoyed about that initially and want to wean myself off the ritual of having a glass in hand, but right now it doesn't feel like the top priority. AL still lurks in my consciousness, and keeping him parked away in a junk yard is enough of a chore.

Instead, I've been wondering about habits that involve refraining from vs engaging in. If I just sat in the house, cooked for myself and didn't buy booze, I'd probably lose weight and stay AF. But there are social and professional challenges out there that require more active engagement and would improve the quality of my life. It's not that I'm not doing anything but I could do more. And I could start chipping away at the scary bits that I tend to procrastinate with. So right now I'm grappling with how to turn that into a new 'activity' habit. It has to be small initially, if it gets too scary I may fall right back into the AL.

On that note, best get a move on.

Have a good Wednesday everybody.

[retteacher]

Wednesday 4 June

I too have many social obligations this month that will have AL included. I'm prepared but can never, ever get complacent. I'm prepared:
-I have my memories of bad drinking bouts.
-I'm appreciating being sober.
-I'm not letting any drinking thinking in.
-I'm settling up all issues as they arise.
-I'm trying not to get stressed &/or overtired.

I'm working hard on staying sober, & it is getting easier as I'm going along.

Thanks everyone for being here...I'll check back later.

Mary

[charlee]

Wednesday 4 June

Morning all
This entire summer is filed w/social obligations for me.....3 weddings and a trip to Italy all in June and July. Can't say I'm prepared, I know I will get myself into stress and overtired mode, but I guess I will just wing it and handle this stuff as it comes. I find if I start thinking and planning I overwhelm myself. ODAT has worked for me regarding AL, and I am working very hard to "train my brain" to deal with life that way......not always successful, but so far it is working for me........We shall see...

Hope everyone has a good hump day!

[Doggygirl]

Wednesday 4 June

Good morning Loppy, STL, Pamina, Mary and charlee and all to come!

Loppy, congrats on 30 days and beyond. I hope you will post more about your course. (or maybe you did in another section here?) It sounds very interesting. Thanks for sharing the link - I'm interested especially in the alcoholism "free" book. Got that baby book marked!

STL congrats on Day 4! The fog is lifting quickly for me this time around too. It just feels different!

Pamina, sounds like you are doing a lot of soul searching in addition to "just" giving up the AL. I'm very interested in hearing about your discoveries! I work from a home office, so it's really easy for me to slip into a "homebound" mode. That happened WITH AL where I just stayed home and drank and preferred it that way (sad). Without AL it can happen too (and has to some degree in the past) where I'm hiding from the world to protect my sobriety. Hmmmmm...... Lot's to think about. I'm glad I go to Curves now - it's something I do daily that gets me around a variety of fun people - not work related, not AF related, etc. etc.

Mary, you sound great and we might have to give you a nick name. I'm thinking ALbliterator or something like that! Congratulations on your progress inside and out Mary!

charlee, all I can say is...can I go to Italy with you??? I'll carry your bags for you, unpack them, re-pack them, iron your clothes, make your dinner reservations, deal with any travel nuisances, etc. Seriously, it sounds like you have a LOT on your plate. I can relate as that sort of schedule would have me being a worry wart, which is tiring!! I hope you can find ways to stay calm and like you said - just take it as it comes.

Day 14 here and I'm so glad to be AF! I still can't believe I'm calm about dinner with the outlaws oops I mean inlaws tonight. It's already been a productive morning - got started de-winterizing the camper, made my dish for the dinner tonight, got laundry started, and now I'm leaving to work out and do my errands. I LOVE mornings un-hung.

Have a great AF day everyone!

DG
**************

[cowgal]

Wednesday 4 June

wednesday

Happy Wednesday everyone, hope you are all doing well, it looks that way so far.

I am struggling (as usual, "for a change") but have some hope.

You all have a wonderful Wednesday and I hope you meet your goals.

love and hugs,:l:h

MA

[Beck]

Wednesday 4 June

Morning everyone,

Had a wonderful day home with husb yesterday. Great walk through the house - no surprises there. Getting set to move - kids packing excitedly. Me packing soberly. ODAT. Kids have a week and a half of school left the last week being half days (what a waste of fuel).

Loppy, good for continuing past 30 days. issues we used to avoid do surface. funny what you can face AF.

Seen, glad to have you back. Sounds like you are ready for AF June. Don't know what happened to "Want" have wondered though.

Char, ODAT works for me but I find it helps to do some advance planning. I've had the impression that wine wasn't your drink of choice - if so, that is a plus for you. At restaurants you will probably be drinking water (aqua naturale and aqua minerale or con gas.) I would plan a lot of events in the early am - incentive to not be hungover. Wine is everywhere. Interestingly, you will never see an Italian drunk. They typically drink house wine with dinner (served in a pitcher has lower AL levels than bottled), eat a lot during the meal, take forever to eat, and drink a lot of water. You are up to this challenge.

Pamina, interesting stuff. You are right. I think putting yourself back out there is very important. I went to a wedding on Saturday that I hadn't planned on attending and had a wonderful time. Reconnected with husb's family. I find myself for the first time in a few years not working. I've had folks approach me about jobs but I'm really not interested in going back to an office environment. I just don't like being indoors and on somebody else's schedule. So now I'm in a new place without the work outlet and will have to productively fill up my time - not just with my kids' stuff.

Mary, I find that I can handle the social stuff pretty well now. What I most fear is slipping privately - drinking at home.

DG, my BIL still refers to me as his "sister out-law" guess my in-laws really didn't like that husb and I lived together before marriage - and of course I was the wayward protestant that lead their baby down that path. LOL.

Cowgal - you were a bit cryptic Sorry you are struggling.

Time to get moving again,
Beck

[Determinator]

Wednesday 4 June

Happy Wednesday ABeroooos!

still unpacking and trying to get caught up on work....eeeeeeek.

Doggygirl I found your observation very interesting:

That happened WITH AL where I just stayed home and drank and preferred it that way (sad). Without AL it can happen too (and has to some degree in the past) where I'm hiding from the world to protect my sobriety. Hmmmmm

good food for thought there

sorry to be brief but....zoom zoom

be well friends!

[vinophile]

Wednesday 4 June

Some very interesting thoughts today!!

When in drinking mode I'm very social and can yap up a storm. When not drinking I want to stay home and be a hermit. Perhaps that would change if i stayed sober for a longer period of time but,so far, have not made it much past 25 days. In fact, my wanting to stay home and "recover" has been an excuse to start drinking again on several occasions. I'll have to ponder this issue.......
Anyway, at day 5 I've noticed that most of the excess fluid has left my body. After drinking a lot I notice knees feel puffy (I'm going to date myself but I always think of the old "Carol Burnett Show" where she used to wear that fat suit playing some character. That's what my legs feel like!!!) That should be reason enough to not drink.
Have to run to the grocery store. After having 5 boys plus my own 3 here for 24 hours there's not a crumb left in the house. Thankfully, for the most part, our grocery stores don't sell alcohol.
Have a great day.

Janet

[Cinders]

Wednesday 4 June

Good evening Abbers,

I am doing much better today after going to ER. Whew, I was in incredible pain yesterday and last night. No sleep. Pacing the hotel room. Arrgghh.

Can't imagine why I didn't go to ER last night? Kinda slow sometimes...

Anyway, I am doing great AF and happy to be without much pain tonight.

Loved the observations. Great food for thought.

Take care everyone.

Love,
Cindi

[4theboyz]

Wednesday 4 June

Good Evening Abbers!!

Finally time for a quick check in. Trying to get all my chores done before we go on a much needed vacation next week.

I hope we get internet there so I can continue to be inspired by these great stories here from you all. I want to thank Loppy for the book link and have been taking a peek and it seems to have some good overviews of the psychology of the addiction process. This is something I feel i really need to have a better understanding on to help myself navigate this confounding addiction.

Feeling good tonight and hope to see you all in the morning!!

Have a great AF night Abbers!!