BOOZE BUSTERS Week of 8/25 (A)bsolutely (F)abulous (H)angover (F)ree 30 Day Challenge

[mwo2]

BOOZE BUSTERS Week of 8/25 (A)bsolutely (F)abulous (H)angover (F)ree 30 Day Challenge

Great 100 Days for you Doggygirl !!

[Doggygirl]

BOOZE BUSTERS Week of 8/25 (A)bsolutely (F)abulous (H)angover (F)ree 30 Day Challenge

Thank you louise and mwo2!! kriger, glad the info on quit smoking stuff might be useful. Best wishes there. You already know the benefits of quitting - but MAN is it tough. The first month was sheer hell. But with a mind set that I would NOT light up again - ever - I was able to somehow view that time as "get this over with and it will be over for good."

WIP I took you up on your book recommendation The Tao of Sobriety. I picked it up at the library yesterday but haven't started it yet. Today and tomorrow are going to be busy, but I'm hoping to have more of a "me" day on Monday and want to get reading.

I've also been giving a lot of thought to your comments about (not sure if I'm using the right term) behavior activation - the role that writing things, making lists, etc. plays. I'd love to hear more of your views on that, and the type of practical things we could all be doing along those lines to help us in this journey. (someday you will regret telling us what you do in life!!!) I hope your Mom is doing OK - I didn't have much time for catching up with other stuff around here yesterday.

Hello to ALL other Booze Busters wherever you are in the World or on your AF journey. WE CAN DO THIS. Let's kick some Booze Beast Ass this weekend!!!!!

DG
Day 101 AFHF

[A Work in Progress]

BOOZE BUSTERS Week of 8/25 (A)bsolutely (F)abulous (H)angover (F)ree 30 Day Challenge

Good morning, all! This morning ALL my animals got up around 4am, en masse, so I let the doggies out and back in, did NOT feed anybody, went back to bed, put a pillow over my head and tried to sleep. Dozed some till 7am. There was grumbling and some yowling, but none of them offered to kill me, and I hope it was a useful beginning to my goal of moving getting-up-time back to a reasonable hour! We'll see.

DG I am glad you got The Tao of Sobriety. I am re-reading it right now, and am not sure that I ever did read it very thoughtfully, the first time. I believe it is my favorite of the meditation or mindfulness-based self-help books, or workbooks, for substance abuse. I am finding it really helpful in my own life right now; even though nothing in it is particularly new to me (it's part of my professional life), it is just great to be taking it on board personally, where I am at this point in re-learning AF life. I do hope you like it. Let us know, OK?

I'll post something one of these days about the whole process I use to teach people to go from (a) life areas they want to make changes in, to (b) specific goals in those areas, to (c) daily or weekly activities they can do that will begin to move them from where they are now, to getting closer to the goals. You can make up a little notebook that lists the activities you choose, and revise the target activities each week, based on various factors. The notebook becomes the place where you get to make "check marks" for each activity completed, which for most people is highly satisfying and, accordingly, highly motivating.

Mother's not doing well... will go back over there and check on her today.

Have a good day and weekend, all!

wip

[vlad]

BOOZE BUSTERS Week of 8/25 (A)bsolutely (F)abulous (H)angover (F)ree 30 Day Challenge

2 days to go...

[A Work in Progress]

BOOZE BUSTERS Week of 8/25 (A)bsolutely (F)abulous (H)angover (F)ree 30 Day Challenge

Is that dread, dear vlad, or happy anticipation???

wip

[Marshy]

BOOZE BUSTERS Week of 8/25 (A)bsolutely (F)abulous (H)angover (F)ree 30 Day Challenge

Morning all!

Hope everyone's having a great weekend. I went to the gym yesterday for the first time on a Saturday and thought it would be very busy, but it was really quiet and I had a lane in the pool to myself. So that's my weekends sorted from now on! (I know, I know, I'm becoming a gym bore - but I prefer it to being a drunken bore).

I'm taking a break from the site for a while. All the fighting has finally got to me - I never join in but it's impossible to avoid because it infects so many threads. Anyway, there's no point me elaborating on that, you all know what it's like.

I'm trying to focus on healthy, positive things in my life, and I'm actively walking away from negative situations as much as I can. Helps to keep me sober!

DG, this thread is a shining example of how it should be - positive, supportive, entertaining. You're doing a great job here!

I'll be back sometime, and I'll be sober. Take care everyone.

[Miss Behaving]

BOOZE BUSTERS Week of 8/25 (A)bsolutely (F)abulous (H)angover (F)ree 30 Day Challenge

This is a real quick check in!

And the first thing I want to say is a belated congrats to DG! Way to go my friend!!! And very happy to hear that Kimba is a bit better.

Back from my break in the wop wops! It was great, but very sadly, my friend with cancer passed away about 12 hours before i left. It left me with wondering whether to go away or not in relation to funeral arrangements, particularly knowing that I wouldn't be in phone or email contact for a couple of days. However decided to trust to fate and that was the right thing to do. Back home this afternoon, tidying up some stuff at the office tomorrow and then away on Tuesday or Wednesday to another part of the country to be part of the funeral arrangements. Ceremonies here can be a bit different and go on for several days ...... long and drawn out, but very good at helping people to grieve and process stuff.

WIP - I will look out for the Tao of Sobriety. I didn't make it through the last couple of days AF ..... but neither did I get plastered. Did lots of thinking though in the quiet of the morning ........ my friend was such an incredibly good person, and I thought a lot about how alcohol stops me being the best person I can be.

Marshy;396756 wrote:
I'm taking a break from the site for a while. All the fighting has finally got to me - I never join in but it's impossible to avoid because it infects so many threads. Anyway, there's no point me elaborating on that, you all know what it's like.

Marshy - I haven't had much time recently to be on the site at all so I dont know what has been going on. But I know that having stuck to this thread that I agree with you about it being positive, supportive and entertaining! Maybe you could just do this one????

mame

[A Work in Progress]

BOOZE BUSTERS Week of 8/25 (A)bsolutely (F)abulous (H)angover (F)ree 30 Day Challenge

Hi Mame, and I am glad you had a good time in the wop-wops, despite the sadness involved, and the need to attend to details for your friend's funeral. Life is always coming at us, isn't it, and so is death. And you said this:

I thought a lot about how alcohol stops me being the best person I can be.

And that applies so very much to me, as well, and it is why I am so committed to being free of alcohol in my life.

Marshy: You said that the fighting is getting to you, so you are taking a break from MWO. Yeah. I am nearly there, myself. I have begun to see this place as a re-creation of my family of origin, and the family from which many alcoholics arise. We have chaos, lies, outbursts of drunkenness and meanness, issues that cannot be addressed without severe punishments being administered, and we also have good spells, some wise and kind people, and also some enablers, and people who are very attached to each other and loyal to each other... sometimes, to a fault. It feels very familiar to me, and so I keep coming around. Yesterday I was hurting, much of the day, in part because I continue to see unpleasant remarks and comments addressed more or less directly at me. A couple of times I have been told that I am "jaded," which makes me wonder if the people using the term even know what it means... but it is so very much unlike me. I just am wondering if the many positives I have found here outweigh the costs. I keep teetering on the edge of that decision. Chief among the "positives" is the Booze Busters thread, thanks to DG. I wish I could be more like her, and I will work on that.

wip

[Doggygirl]

BOOZE BUSTERS Week of 8/25 (A)bsolutely (F)abulous (H)angover (F)ree 30 Day Challenge

Good morning!!

Marshy I think you make a FINE "gym rat." Somebody has to give Ingergallactic SuperSwimmer(tm) Michael King Phelps a run for his money in the pool!! (will get to that other topic in a moment but Marshy if you read this, could you PM me? I can't PM you. I would love to keep in touch.....)

MAME!!!!! It is so very good to see you. I am so sorry to hear that your friend passed. I can't imagine how sad you must be. It sounds like she was a very good person. It sounds like it was a good decision to go ahead to the wop-wops and get in some relaxation with Uncle Mame before heading out to help with funeral arrangements. The sentence that WIP quoted really stood out to me too - almost brought a tear to my eye it is so true for me as well. (worth repeating so here goes)

I thought a lot about how alcohol stops me being the best person I can be.

Take care Mame - hope you will have a chance to at least check in and say hi until you leave town again.

WIP I can imagine how hurt you must feel about comments that seem directed at you. I feel as though I have understood where you were coming from in your posts as I have always needed "tough love" by way of support to stop drinking - not hugs and "it's OK." Right before I pulled my head out of the bottle for what is hopefully the last time, Booze Buster Satori left MWO for what I gather (I wasn't here to see it all first hand) were similar reasons to the stuff going on now. He was a tough love guy too. While tough love may not be for everyone, it's what many of us here need (whether we think we need tough love at the time or not) and I am sad to see that side of needed support being.....well....discouraged? (not sure if that's the word I'm looking for)

I'm really saddened by how out of control things feel around here. I laid awake in the middle of the night last night thinking about it, and that's not good. Nothing against MWO, the program, or the people. There are people here that have been here long before I arrived, and will still be here long after I'm gone. I respect that there is a "culture" and history that is part of this forum that won't change unless RJ wants it too. I'm running out of energy and frankly, interest for it. You are right Marshy - it's hard to avoid the bickering threads, BS threads, etc. At least the Monthly Abs section has stayed calm in the storm, with a #1 focus on achieving sobriety. Then other topics second to that. At least that's the way I've felt about it.

My goals now are migrating away from just "not drinking" as my #1 priority. Of course that's the foundation but I really did loose my life in there somewhere, and I want it back. I need to stay positive and not even read stuff that just drags me down. Last night in the night, I decided to try for one more month posting mainly here in Monthly Abs and seeing if I can just stop myself from reading the ugly stuff. (even though I know it's a downer - curiousity still gets the better of me sometimes, and then I get frustrated with myself!!) Regardless of other happenings on the board, I think after the next month it will be time for a fresh face to start the weekly Booze Buster e-mails, or even to retire Booze Busters and start with something fresh.

I think we all go through phases when we stop drinking, and the second phase is "get out there and have a life" which is where I'm at. Not that I don't need support any more. I surely do, and will need it for life. I just need to spend less time at the computer, and more time doing other things. Rather than make a rash decision I want to give things another month to see if MWO really is a good fit for my "phase next" needs, and also to see whether the current culture of MWO is such that I can "give back" in the way *I* can give - not necessarily the way others feel they need to give, if that makes any sense. (tough love)

Looks like a time of contemplation on many levels here at the end of August. I hope everyone has a GREAT day, and is ready to ROAR into September sober, and with great goals for the new month.

I'm so excited to be going to visit Mom & Dad today. Speaking of - I need to go put the ribs in the oven. We are pampering Mom & Dad - going for a mid afternoon "lunch" and me and Mr. Doggy bringing ALL the food so Mom doesn't have to do anything. This time has been hard on her too. I know that we need to treasure every moment with Mom & Dad in their home (the home where I grew up since age 5). One never knows. I probably already said all this yesterday - sorry if I'm repeating! That's a confusing part of posting on two forums.

No matter what is going on here, nothing will stop us from KICKING BOOZE BEAST ASS today. I plan to do just that with a GOOD ATTITUDE to boot!! :b&d:

DG
Day 102 AF

[louise]

BOOZE BUSTERS Week of 8/25 (A)bsolutely (F)abulous (H)angover (F)ree 30 Day Challenge

DG, update on Kimba please? Have fun at your parents - sounds yummy.
Marshy, could you just stick around on this thread and ignore the rest? We need you!
Mame, I'm so sorry about your friend. Hgs to you. I'm glad you had a nice time in the wop wops (love that word).
WIP, I'm sorry you are feeling attacked. I do think family of origin stuff comes up no matter where we are in life. I frequently feel like I don't fit in or belong (both in real and cyber worlds). I constantly have
to remind myself that those are old feelings. People come here wanting very different things and with different personalities, etc. And sometimes, something that is meant to be loving comes across wrong because with just words on the screen you can't see or hear the caring tone. I have decided to limit my time here on the weekends drastically as it seems that is when things are wild. That has been easy this weekend as with painting crew at home and our trip to Santa Fe, access and time are limited.
Tomorrow is Monday Vlad!
Hi to Pamina, Hannah, Resolute and everyone else! Have a restful, fun Sunday.

[A Work in Progress]

BOOZE BUSTERS Week of 8/25 (A)bsolutely (F)abulous (H)angover (F)ree 30 Day Challenge

Thanks, Louise. But I am not talking about family of origin "stuff coming up" for me. I am talking about THIS PLACE being full of a bunch of drunks who behave like the various members of the families that many of us were raised in, in every which way. It's making me sick.

But I certainly agree with you that it is NUTS here on the weekends, and there is a MASSIVE amount of apparent misunderstanding, some of it due to the medium, some of it due to people who have taken sides in some kind of battle and just attacking the current "enemy," regardless.

Sorry you did not get to go to Santa Fe... I love Santa Fe... and Taos, even more...

wip

[Miss Behaving]

BOOZE BUSTERS Week of 8/25 (A)bsolutely (F)abulous (H)angover (F)ree 30 Day Challenge

I was curious about some of the comments about what had been going on so I went and checked a few threads out .... but quickly stopped! I'm not even going to comment on it!

I think it would be sad if people felt chased away though .... particularly when there are some really positive things happening and such good support. Having said that, I wouldn't expect that we would all want to be posting here for the rest of our lives!!! I think of this place as one that helps me with the dealing with the issues that I am dealing with in my "real life" life, without recourse to drinking (which has been the crutch that I have mainly used in the past) ..... so it is like a substitute crutch, but as I go on I hope to limp a bit less, and I'd like to be able to throw away the crutches at some point!

I think if people move on because the time is right for them to do so then that is fantastic and that MWO has been important in helping them get their lives back. And I reckon anyone in that space we should send of with cheers of celebration and best wishes. and a party with half nekked bods!!! :H:H:H:H

Anyway, thanks for all your thoughts and hugs about my friend. I'm actually feeling, in a funny sort of way, that after all that has gone on over the last coupe of months that it is now all behind me and I'm moving onwards and upwards. Today is 1 September, spring has sprung (lots of baby lambs and daffodils sighted last week!!!) and I got back into running a bit last week after 2 months of very intermittent exercise. This morning I was up at 6am and headed out for an hours walk, and I feel really peaceful at the moment! trying to clear out the office for the week today, but my head really isn't into it!!

Am booked at a place to stay that claims to have free wi-fi so I'll take my lap-top away with me so may be able to check in, but will just have to see!!

have a good week all!

[Doggygirl]

BOOZE BUSTERS Week of 8/25 (A)bsolutely (F)abulous (H)angover (F)ree 30 Day Challenge

Hi all!!!

Louise, Kimba is slowly improving. She is at a point where she WANTS to do more than she can, and/or should be doing. The back legs are still not recieving 100% of what her brain is sending - or is not recieving it at the correct speed. So we have to be careful. But she is walking and we have no reason to believe that she won't recover enough to have a very full doggy life. It just remains to be seen how much of the back end functionality she will get back. When I had back surgery, the neurologist told me that he could visibly see the nerve damage in my lower back (the nerves discolor when they are damaged). He told me that there is really nothing a doctor can do to force the nerves to heal- they heal as much as they are going to on their own, and it takes time. He told me that I would not know whether I would fully recover or not for 2 years, and that's about what it took. I don't know if that's the same for dogs and/or her type of injury compared to mine. But it could take a long time and we're cool with that. Lots of things have been different here to keep a good recovery environment for her. (no interaction at all to this point with the other dogs). Even going forward, we are going to have to limit that, and restrict how and where they interact so she doesn't hurt herself. So some routines will be changing as well. Thank you so much for caring and asking!!

So louise did you go to Santa Fe? I've never been there but have seen shows on TV set there and also heard some things - it sounds wonderful. I hope you are having a great holiday weekend.

WIP some of the doings here of late have given me pause for thought, and really I think it's been good for me. I think it was good for me to spend LOTS of time here early on - I really needed minute by minute support right under my nose to keep from drinking. But I'm somewhere in a "phase next" where I NEED to be exploring other things. Sometimes I think things happen in the right timing for good reason, even though we don't always understand it. I'm actually very comfortable just expanding horizons.

Mame - like you said - at some point we have to sort of graduate in some way that I'm sure is different for everyone. I think I'm in maybe 2nd grade or something like that in my AF life. You sound very peaceful and your walk this morning sounds nice!!! I'm glad spring is coming to your part of the world. You are my first friend from new Zealand and I can already see that we can sort of "swap" seasonal energy. Especially once the depths of winter arrive in these parts, I hope you will keep telling us about flowers and summer stuff!!! I hope all goes well at your office this week, and with your plans to travel for your friend's funeral.

We had a very nice time at Mom & Dads. I am working hard mentally to accept their decisions about their life without getting worked up. Dad is a shadow of his former self, but this is - sadly - part of life. Mom is exhausted but she would rather work her tail off and live in the country than give that up for a more convenient, easier lifestyle. So be it. We will help them with little stuff when we can, and I will work on not worrying about the bigger stuff that they need to find ways to take care of. They are resourceful people and they WILL take care of it. Mary - if you are reading I think I am relating to some of your discoveries of late in your relationship with your parents.

Mr. Doggy and I are planning to go for a bike ride tomorrow!! We just never thought of it this summer. This is the kind of "discovery" that is possible once we rid our lives of AL. Simple stuff. We have a massive bike trail the passes right by our neighborhood. I mean MASSIVE. It leads to many places for many many miles. We are planning to ride through one of the forest preserves.

Happy Monday Mame and Happy rest of Sunday to all you other Booze Busters!!

DG
Day 102

[louise]

BOOZE BUSTERS Week of 8/25 (A)bsolutely (F)abulous (H)angover (F)ree 30 Day Challenge

DG, I'm so happy to hear the news about KImba. Not great news, but as long as she can live a happy life and feel loved by her people, it is something. We did make it to Santa Fe a day late. When we realized we would still be in town last night we tried to go to the dog boarding place to pick up "Curly" and bring him home for the night and take him back in the am due to painters. Alas, they are closed due to the holiday and we slept really really well due to no barking (he is 12 and barks at nothing these days.)

We went out to dinner at a place that was recommended by guide books and turned out to be even more fabulous than stated. Back to our charming hotel now, getting ready for bed and a trip to a special exhibit at the Georgia O'Keefe museum tomorrow on Ansel Adams/Georgia O'Keefe. And maybe a massage? Then back to reality again, but at least most of the house painting will be done and I am so excited about that! Maybe, except for the back yard and fence, I can have everything done on the house before my sisters (both of them, plus a baby great niece) come for balloon fiesta! This will be so novel! Usually I only get a house completely fixed up when I know we are moving and am planning to sell. Fix it all up and live in it? Hmmm, it will be strange.
May not have time to check in Monday. Hope you all have great day. I plan for Monday to be day 1 again for me and to make it to 30 again in September (August was not so great - but I remember June, so I know I can do it.)

[A Work in Progress]

BOOZE BUSTERS Week of 8/25 (A)bsolutely (F)abulous (H)angover (F)ree 30 Day Challenge

Louise, the Santa Fe trip sounds fabulous. Glad you will be jumping back into BoozeBusters tomorrow and September!

DG, I am SO GLAD that Kimba is doing so much better, and there's every hope she will continue to slowly improve!

You made a very good comment:

I think it was good for me to spend LOTS of time here early on - I really needed minute by minute support right under my nose to keep from drinking. But I'm somewhere in a "phase next" where I NEED to be exploring other things.

I have been having a very hard time staying away from this place, even when it was downright painful to be here, because I am so early in recovery (this time around) and it has felt as if this is such an important part of my overall plan to stay AF. I think I have been afraid that if I did not have the support of the "community" at MWO, then I would lose my battle to get/stay free from alcohol... For whatever reason, I stumbled onto this site when I was looking somewhat desperately for a way to get help outside the AA model, and here I still am. In a perfect world, I would have found a site exactly like this, EXCEPT that it would have much more of an emphasis on abstinence. But it is what it is, and I have been helped tremendously by several people here, and by the MWO approach as it applies to freedom from alcohol abuse (which, for me, means being free from alcohol).

All that being said, I certainly need AF support outside of MWO. I am most interested in watching your progress, DG, your ventures into other groups that provide assistance in this area. I would prefer face-to-face meetings but (like many here), I am still resistant to AA because I know that many of my ideas about alcohol abuse and recovery from alcoholism clash with many of AA's Central Truths. And there aren't other non-AA groups meeting locally, so far as I have been able to see.

Hope everyone has a good Labor Day!