Monday 8 September

[Loppy lugs]

Morning all, hope everyone had a great weekend.

I chilled out and did the absolute minimum of everything. I think sometimes it i necessary. Also a big improvement for me not to feel compelled to be working my way down a to do list.

I think I am over my blue for the moment. Sorry to keep disappearing but when I feel bad I am no use to anyone so just hide myself away. In the past it would have been in alcoholic oblivion but his time I made good with some carrot cake.

A really busy week with a mixture of stressful rubbish work things to do and some nice social stuff to balance it out. Feeling optimistic.

Hope everyone is in a good place and that the days continue to rack up.

Take care

[Carmac]

Monday 8 September

Loppy,

Always love seeing your avatar and hearing whats up with you. Understand totally the need to just "chill". Me too!

I'm also very lad to hear your blue period appears to be over.

I,too, have much to do today with a major project to be finished up and sent over to the client. Plus, I have decided to try some of the alcohol free wines so plan to stop by a local place later and buy a bottle of different ones to try over time and see if any are tasty! I so like to have my wine glass at the dinner table. If late it has been full of 1/2 pomegranate juice and 1/2 diet 7 - up or gingerale....yum!

Must run all - Have a wonderful AF day...

[Doggygirl]

Monday 8 September

Good Day abbers!! Loppy - thank you for getting us started today and hello Carmac.

Loppy, I'm glad you made it through the last several days OK - I know it was a bit of a rough patch with the memories. Carrot cake sounds like good comfort food. Yesterday at the SMART meeting we talked about lifestyle balance and the importance of building a new AF life and getting beyond the "just not drinking" stage. But part of the balance has to be a comfort level just "being" sometimes - not always "action." I need to work on the ability to "just be" comfortably. Glad you decided to just chill over the weekend. Sounds like you have a good week lined up with some fun things to counter the work stuff.

Carmac I hope you like the AF wines better than I did. I previously tied Fre - both a white and a pink but I found them too sweet. I tried an Ariel white more recently and that one tasted like vinegar to me. I DO like to have AF beer around and those taste good on occassion, but I've been disappointed in the wines. Pomegranate juice and diet ginerale on the other hand - now THAT is sounding good!! Will be intereted to hear if you like the wines better - or if maybe you find a different brand that you like better than Fre or Ariel.

Yesterday me and Mr. Doggy had to return the new grill. We used it twice but there is something very wrong with how the burners / ignition / gas flow all worked. The knobs didn't work properly to control the flow of gas and the 2nd time we used it, the gas would NOT go off turning the knobs - we had to turn it off at the main switch on the tank. Not right! We weren't sure whether it was assembled incorrectly (Sears assembled it) or defective. But fire is nothing to fool with.

When we got it back to Sears - no small feat getting a big grill loaded up even in an explorer - they wouldn't take it back despite their published customer satisfaction guarantee. They told us to take it back home and call their service department who would *try* to fix it. We told they they were welcome to take the grill and set it next to THEIR house with a gas problem of some sort, and let the service department *try* to fix it at their location.

The amazing thing is that Mr. Doggy just decided the hassle wouldn't be worth it and we probalby wouldn't get our money back in any case, and he was OK and calm about that. He didn't BLAME ME for picking out a crappy grill or get grumpy in general and take it out on me. We then had a very good talk about how our mutual sobriety has made such a big positive difference in our relationship and our lives. It was all good.

Hello to all abbers yet to come. Happy Monday!

DG

[retteacher]

Monday 8 September

DG: What a lovely story about your discussion w/your husb about the grill. I've found my husband & I are so much more compatible now that I'm sober. It isn't just that I'm calmer. It's that issues come out & are resolved. When I was drinking, I was nervous about speaking up (even if I wasn't under the influence). I felt guilt-ridden & paranoid (that husb would say something about the drinking), & therefore kept quiet when I should have spoken up.

I didn't have a hard time yesterday, but it was a quiet Sunday...the first of football season ( husb is an avid fan). Sunday was my day to drink wo/him noticing. I thought about all those lost Sundays, & just made a firm decision NOT to go there. What a relief! I can't count the number of Mondays I woke up sick in both body & spirit & had to pretend otherwise.

I can't remember how I found MWO. I must have put alcoholism + recovery into Google. I know that I wouldn't be where I am today (sober, happy, & functioning on all cylinders) wo/all of you here.

Thank you, Mary

[on my way]

Monday 8 September

Howdy abbers!!

Wow, busy thread already. Mary, I too am glad to have found MWO. I bought the book, read it and then looked at the web site. I would have to call it a life saver.
Glad your football Sunday went well. I still don?t know who won?Bears or Colts. I fell asleep in the 4 qtr. I understand your football issues as my hubby would do the same thing and I would plow though 1 ? bottles of red. But last night I had ginger ale and watched with him, instead of solo drinking in the other room.

Doggy, I did not know you both were on the path to sobriety. What a change in your relationship, I am glad it has been so beneficial to you both. I find when I?m not tanked; tired or hung-over; I can take life in stride. It is a whole lot more fun too.

Yesterday went by so fast. Canned more tomato stuff, made a big bowl of garlicky salsa el fresco and some pasta salad with shrimp. Worked in the garden and we finished laying the tile, now on the grout. I am interested in the SMART program; I really need a life after drinking plan.

Best to you all!! omw

[Seen the light!]

Monday 8 September

Hi everyone

Just wanted to stop in and say hello!! I gave in at the weekend and drank - I now know what one of my biggest triggers is and that is tiredness. This has been one of my downfalls in the past and I've only just realised. I feel like I'm pieceing together all my triggers and now hopefully I can stop them before they start

Back to Day 1 again for me - hope you're all having a good day xx

[Determinator]

Monday 8 September

Happy hangover-free Monday AB friends!!!!

wonderful positive and inspiring posts for a Monday...nice! and OMW you are just teasing me with the talk of garlicky salsa! I could eat that for breakfast for sure.

I watched a UFC (martial arts fights) Sat on pay per view which I always used to get tanked for, and now I don't even think about drinking. it would only cloud my memory and encourage me to eat more junkfood (don't need help there). I also like to really analyse the moves/techniques and when I'm in my right mind I can actually remember the fights the next day! what a concept.

the political season brings with it a storm of 'unenlightenment' or so I've coined it as of last night when my tolerance for such things finally bottomed out. Times like this I need to realize it's a charade and in the grand scheme of life it is meaningless. tomorrow I have a long road trip and look forward to listening to a couple CD's of Tolle's "a new earth" which I find so inspiring and calming.

be well friends

[Determinator]

Monday 8 September

Seen the light, glad you popped back in so soon and didn't hide out on a binger. glad you are learning too. I keep the memory of my last bender very close in my mind.
xxxxxx

[on my way]

Monday 8 September

Seen, glad you are considering your triggers. There has been much talk here lately about lists. One list that I have made is triggers. I have a bunch. Some are unavoidable, some not. The later, I avoid like the plague.

Det, had some on my scrambled eggs this AM, Fabulous! Garlic is s food group in our home... right after good dark chocolate

omw

[retteacher]

Monday 8 September

Seen: I too want to drink when I'm tired. Sometimes when I've been going, going, going all day & am tired & over-stimulated, the only way I see to relax is to drink. I'm learning other ways to relax. It's helpful for me to realize that I won't have just 1 or 2 to relax. I would drink the whole darn bottle & then I'd REALLY be tired.

Yes, realizing what the triggers are & then talking to myself about the downside of giving in really works for me.

Mary

[Tiny]

Monday 8 September

I want to come back...

... I've been away for awhile and while nothing extreme has happened the word "steady" comes to mind... I want to come back and enjoy the feeling of abstaining... is there room for me?

[Cinders]

Monday 8 September

Hi, Abbers.

I am running late as usual, need to finish packing.

I had to postpone my flight until this afternoon because head was hurting so badly this morning, my right eye was weeping, my right nostril running, and that stupid little guy with the ice pick was stabbing me in the head. Arrrgghh.

So, I am still in bathrobe, although my face is made up beautifully :H, and I need to finish the packing.

However, once upon a time, this would have led to a binge. Liquid relief as Mary calls it. But not today. Today I am dealing with it sober.

This weekend I had a wonderful time with grandchildren and family. The head pain started yesterday afternoon but I powered through it because the grandkids were having so much fun and I was enjoying my chance to be with them. No head pain is going to take that away from me. Oh, and alcohol is not going to take that away from me, either!!

Like Mary, sometime last year I found this place. I have relapsed many times but never given up. I will never give up.

The sober Cindi is one awesome person. The drunk Cindi is a complete mess.

Today is 4 weeks. Wednesday will be 30 days.

In the scheme of things, that is not a lot of time but this time around it is huge. Why?

Because my head isn't saying, "okay, you've done well, now maybe you could start drinking a few here and there, just to relax, you know..." My head is saying, "Yikes, stay away from me!! You have tried to ruin my life and I am not going to let you!!"

Seen. You keep on trying. Just like me. If I ever fall again, I will pick myself up, dust myself off and keep going. The sober life is hugely fun, sometimes tricky to navigate, but it is living. The drunk life is not living, it is not really even existing. It is horrible.

I was talking to someone at AA about how I view my options as "Stay sober and live, drink and die" and he responded, "No there is a third option, it is the worst. You stay in that misery a long tine." He is right.

Love to all,
Cindi

[A Work in Progress]

Monday 8 September

Dropped my cell phone in the toilet. Discovered that those suckers destroy themselves INSTANTLY when they are immersed. Had to buy new damn cellphone.

How can it be that something that did not even exist 10 (or however many) years ago now is ESSENTIAL to life as we know it???

This is the SECOND time today I have posted something about my desire to live in a hut, out in the country, all by myself except my dogs and maybe a goat, off the feckin grid!! Some books and a lantern. A nice wool blanket. Someone to come in once a week to bring groceries and clean the hut....

Ah, life is funny.

wip

[garden girl]

Monday 8 September

hi everyone, thanks to all who responded yesterday, i dont feel like writing much as yet but im here and af so i will speak again tomorrow. i had a good day at work but still feel quiet after the awful weekend. i will write about that over the next few days.

ggxx

[Determinator]

Monday 8 September

Tiny and Garden Girl, great to see you here. and heck yes...always room in the AB hut for more friends.

speaking of huts AWIP I can sooo relate. a big teepee in Idaho somewhere is sounding good.

Cindi, what the heck is wrong with your eye/nose? ?? hope it gets better pronto. xxx