AF Daily, Thursday December 4th

[momof3]

AF Daily, Thursday December 4th

Good Morning,

OK, I am going to take One Two's pearls of wisdom and run with it. I am going to see this holiday time as an "achievement period"...an opportunity for me to be my AF self no matter what.

And oh, I can so identify with the boring aspect of socializing. I just cannot hang out and chit chat like that anymore. I wonder how many parties there would be if there was no longer any alcohol?

[startingover]

AF Daily, Thursday December 4th

Oh Mo3! I thought it was just me who got bored with the chit chat! Thank you for voicing that!
Have a great day everyone...

[Cinders]

AF Daily, Thursday December 4th

I agree with the shift in attitude being key.

I am going to look at being AF through the holidays as an achievement, one I can achieve, and one I want to achieve.

I want to feel some pride in myself.

Love,
Cindi

[charlee]

AF Daily, Thursday December 4th

Morning all
Getting through last years holiday season, although somewhat challenging, proved to be a turning point for me. I said goodbye to AL in Nov 07 and knew if I could hurdle the holiday obstacle my determination would be stronger than ever. I still took it day by day, party by party. The physical craving was not my concern, it was the mental. I could picture the envy, feel the sadness. I remember feeling that this was the one time of year "slugging back a few (??) and feeling that buzz in public would be totally acceptable, and not having to run to my hidden stash would be such a freedom.
It took me many months after coming to MWO to finally make the decision to say farewell to AL. I needed to know and believe that I was ready to face all obstacles large and small without turning to the booze. Until I was ready to commit to that, I might as well keep drinking. I know me, I could find any excuse, reason, and if there wasn't one, I was great at making one up!
I stood by my commitment and when January 08 arrived I brought the New Year in sober, the first time in many years. I had done it!!!....It was going to be a great new year...and it is....
Hope everyone has a terrific Thursday....

[retteacher]

AF Daily, Thursday December 4th

Momof3: We've gone to 12 steppers' parties (AA, Alanon) where there is no AL. They're different but fun. They usually have an activity such as a game of some sort. Last time we went to a small party, after we ate, we took our dogs for a hike...fun w/no hangover. I have such a feeling of pride when I go through any kind of a social event sober. That was one of my main motivations to drink...making social events easier. I don't have to make life easier. I can take life as it comes clear-eyed, so that I can REALLY enjoy it...not just get through it w/a fuzzy head. I'm beginning to realize that life-long abs is going to give me the gift of enjoying life in all its variety.

Mary

[retteacher]

AF Daily, Thursday December 4th

Charlee: Many thanks for the inspiring post. I too went through the holidays last year abs but unfortunately slipped in early Spring. Since then, I've had limited success w/staying abs. This time, however, I am saying "farewell" to AL (as you put it). I don't want or need it in my life anymore. Thank you for your sharings...I so look forward to reading them. Mary

PS: I too had a "hidden stash." Toward the end, it didn't last very long & needed constant replacement.

[A Work in Progress]

AF Daily, Thursday December 4th

Great thoughts about achievement vs. challenge! Thanks, Brigid and all. I have been thinking along those same lines, I think, but had not really identified it as such in my mind. The twist I have been putting on it is that it will help me to achieve something else during this time, which is good in its own right and also will help keep me distracted from the "holiday" blues. I bought and have started studying an online Spanish language program (I speak just a little, and want to become fluent), and last night I found a nearby YMCA that has one of those "boot camp" classes. So, a couple of new projects will help, I think. I have done AF Christmases before... but it's always been with pretty much a gritted-teeth, get-me-through-this attitude.

Not everyone can take on a new challenge during this time, due to being busy with family Christmas stuff, entertaining. But for me, since my only family is my mother, and I don't entertain much (though I plan to do more of that)... this time of year carries with it a lot of time that is left, wide open.

Hoping everyone has a good day. Sausage, it's been a siege, hope you are back to 100% by the weekend! Cinders, I hope it goes very well with the therapist; Namaste, yours sounds like a gem. Tom, soup at 4pm can be a fantastic, smart choice!! Good for you. MO3... moms' team for football, eh? And, hello to all...

[universal]

AF Daily, Thursday December 4th

Hi guys,

Got through yesterday so am at day 10 in this string of days. Goal is moderation and have been fairly successful since Nov 07 when I joined but I just want to get some AF days in to make the holidays easier. I am actually not feeling the desire to drink at all so that is good. I have a wedding on Saturday that may be a challenge for me but to be honest, the thought of feeling like crap on Sunday morning is a pretty strong deterrant right now.

We shall see! I have a busy day at work so I should go and get things done. I hope you all have a great day!

Love and hugs,
Uni

[LVT25]

AF Daily, Thursday December 4th

Good morning all! I'm just going to say good morning to everybody from now on. I hope you all that are in a different "world" than me don't mind! :H

Really cold here. Wish I didn't have to go out, but I do. sigh.

I like the idea of achievement vs challenge. I also like the idea of not dwelling on it. I'm pretty confident I'll do okay during the holidays.

Tom 3.0--I discovered early on in this journey that I was also replacing food in the evenings with beer and cigarettes. In the past I wouldn't eat until I was all done drinking. UggH!
Now, when I'm around drinkers, seems like I'm eating all the time. so my plan is to really bump up the exercise so I don't wake up some day 50 pounds heavier!:H

Cindi--I truly hope you feel better soon, and I hope your appt goes well today.

Better get busy today. I have many chores on my to do list today.

Have a great one everybody!:h

[AAthlete]

AF Daily, Thursday December 4th

Sausage, I have those dream somewhat regularly, but most of the time I was making a very conscience decision to do so and in my dreams am very remorseful. I used to wake up from those very vivid dreams extremely upset because I assumed they were a harbinger of a binge to come.

Now, I treat them as a cautious warning and nothing more. I get a reminder of how I would feel without actually taking that first drink, and I know that is not a place I want to go.

[Determinator]

AF Daily, Thursday December 4th

Happy Thursday ABomatics!!

what a busy thread this is, I'm so happy this wonderful section is fourishing with great folks.

Universal, great to see you in these parts! enjoy your AF time.

Ok, lets step back and have a look at what the holidays are:

they are just like any other days, but with the added POSITIVE influences of joyful reflection, gratefulness, giving, family gathering etc.

it would seem like the holidays would be the one time of year where al would be unnecessary by default! with all the positive distractions going on I wonder how the tradition got soaked in booze over the years. I really don't know how that happened.

it would seem like if there were a time to drink it would be tax day. ahahahahahaa! a hem.....

getting ready for next week on the road all week. arg. it will end with a gathering of all my hard drinking coworkers and bosses to have a "few cocktails" and discuss the business. oh joy. I think for this occasion I'll take the antabuse as a preemptive move.

be well friends!

[on my way]

AF Daily, Thursday December 4th

Just went to the cellar to load up the wood stove and start it. Tired of paying the salty gas bill for the furnace. So I open it up and there is Starling in there. HOLY SHIZZZZ, it scared me half to death. Glad I did not need to pee

I know this is kinda random.... but so much better than poo of yesterday. ODAT!!

[retteacher]

AF Daily, Thursday December 4th

It is so great to see so many new people on this thread. It is my mainstay for support. Thanks for being here. Mary

[spottydingo]

AF Daily, Thursday December 4th

Hi everyone, I can't believe how many people have joined this thread! Its great! I've been lurking for the past week or so, as I've been trying not to spend so much time on the computer, but as usual there are wonderful discussions here and lots of pearls of wisdom.

I'm excited and nervous about meeting my doc this afternoon as I finally had blood tests done to determine whether my thyroid is out of whack. I was really disappointed as I had to twist her arm to get a battery of tests rather than the basic one (DG, I know you'll appreciate this). Also she rolled up her eyes when I mentioned taking Armour rather than Synthroid. So, I have an appt with another doctor tomorrow who I got off the Top Thyroid Doctor list (and who doesn't accept my insurance so I'll have to pay out of pocket, arggh) for a second opinion. We'll see. I've been reading a great book about Hypothyroidism and its amazing how many symptoms I have. Also amazing is that both my Mom and Sister are on Synthroid and still have symptoms! DG, THANK YOU so much for alerting me to this possibility. I'll be very surprised if my tests don't show anything.

It would just be so great to know what my problem is, because the depression and ill health I feel all the time contributes SO much to my drinking. I feel like I can't function like "normal" people which makes me feel like a huge loser which makes me want to self-medicate which makes me feel like crap which makes me feel like a loser ... LOL I think you get the picture!

That being said I'm on Day 5, but feeling good (as good as I can). Thanksgiving was sort of a bust as we ended up staying home. I think it would have been easier to be AF if we had gone somewhere else. We're going to my parents' house back east for Christmas so that will be easier to stay AF. There will be AL but my mom watches me like a hawk so I've found its better to abstain anyway. The biggest thing will be our Xmas morning ritual where I make a huge pitcher of Bloody Marys that we drink while opening gifts ... I'll still make them (I make the BEST ones if I do say so myself) but mine will be a Virgin, thank you.

Anyway, in other news my Jeep is at the shop again ... I'm afraid it is on its last legs (its a 1996 with almost 200,000 miles) and its probably costing us more in repairs than its worth, but we can't really afford a new car right now. Sure wish we had the $$ to take advantage of all the good car prices! But, it does make me sad as I :h my Jeep (I call it my Little Mule) as its the only car I've ever owned (I always lived in cities) and I'm really attached to it.

A note for Namaste: I also have an old kitty (~22) with kidney issues. Are you doing anything for him/her? I have had very good results with subcutaneous fluids and the addition of a phosphorus blocker to her food. Feel free to PM me if you don't know about these and want more info. Also there's a good Yahoo! group for kidney issue kitties.

Cheers everyone!

[kaponium]

AF Daily, Thursday December 4th

Aloha all - awaking to the sun for the first time in many days - it is good! Grateful to be sober.

Reteach - I like the sound of the AA christmas buzz - been to a couple of AA New Years BBQs myself, very wise move, and YES, FUN!!!

Namaste - totally agree with the Altered Attidudes thing, for me it is not just putting down the drink, but working on evolving and re-learning a whole new and serene way of life....funny thing is, that over the years ( and with the "benefit(?)" of many relapses) this metamorphis thing is just happening without my help!!!

By not taking that first drink, I am FINALLY being restored to sanity...(And THAT was no small feat!)

Great to be here