Daily AF Thread - Wednesday December 10

[Doggygirl]

"Marking" to get us started - as only a doggy can do!

DG

[Doggygirl]

Daily AF Thread - Wednesday December 10

WOW what a great thread yesterday. I had a busy day but just sped read it but did not have time to take notes. Wish I DID have time to tell each and every person how meaningful I found all the topics. AA- we are going through some stress with our business right now (along with 99% or more of the population in this economy) and I have been guilty of getting self centered and a bit in pity party mode about it. Your post about humility was REALLY a stand out for me based on recent happenings. Thank you.

There is a lawyer in the business referral group I go to every Tuesday. At this time of year when he has his turn as the featured speaker, he usually reviews the DUI laws and any changes, as it is a good warning for everyone during the party season. LOL - there were a million questions I wanted to ask during his presentation yesterday but it would have revealed my status as a recovering alcoholic, and I don't think that has a place in my work place. But anyway, the law changes coming in January in IL are quite interesting. First time DUI is 6 month suspended license if you blow and 12 months if you refuse to blow. No driving at all for 30 days. The judge's special driving privelege part is changing - people will no longer have to submit their work place and routes and drive times and all of that. For first time DUI's the judge's special permission to drive will be automatic, and come with that blow thingy in your car. Also, those things after Jan 1 will require you to periodically blow while you are driving. If you don't, you will hear a warning with enough time to pull off the road, then your horn will be blasting and your lights flashing so the police can come give you another DUI oops I mean see if you need help.

I am so glad I don't drink any more. And Tom 3.0, after sitting through that presentation and then reading your post from yesterday about moderation basically being a big joke across all of the population, I think I agree. The people who were asking questions were asking such things as "how many drinks can I have before I will be over the limit?" and stuff like that. Really irrelevant stuff if you kill somebody with your car.

Anyway....just gave me a lot to think about - and be grateful about as I ran around with busy stuff yesterday.

Gotta run and get my workout over with, then get ready for the first board meeting!

Oh Deter and any other low carbers. This low carb biscuit recipe is better than sex. Really. Healthy Indulgences: biscuits

Have a great day all!

DG

[Cinders]

Daily AF Thread - Wednesday December 10

DG,

Speaking of drinking and driving...

I remember my hubby telling my kids and their friends at a gathering at my house once, "You can have an accident at any time, that is why they are called accidents. You might kill someone in that accident. If you had been drinking, even a ittle, you would ask yourself the rest of your life if it was because you had been drinking. Don't drink and drive."

I thought those were pretty wise words.

Love,
Cindi

[greeneyes]

Daily AF Thread - Wednesday December 10

I've been so busy I missed yesterday's thread but will check it when I get back in town this afternoon. I stood up in front of the fly fishing Christmas meeting (a room full of men - I being the only female) and while blushing, announced my loss of my fishing buddy and that if anyone wanted company, well, I wasn't too high maintenance, etc. I couldn't believe I did that sober, but when you quit drinking I think everybody has that fear of "Eeek! Who will I be?" and you know....... you're that same person. Anyway everybody clapped and I got some offers.

All I can say is that with all this divorce stuff, I guess I'll make biscuits. :H Or make different announcement at the next meeting :H:H:H

[Cinders]

Daily AF Thread - Wednesday December 10

Greenie,

:l:l and :H:H

Love,
Cindi

[retteacher]

Daily AF Thread - Wednesday December 10

Hi DG & All to Come: I just read the end of the daily thread from yesterday. The photos say it all. Those photos counteract the print & TV ads filled w/beautiful people having fun w/a drink. I've noticed an upsurge of ads in TV lately, probably due to the holidays...vodka, other spirits, wine, beer...always w/lovely dressed-up people. No vomiting or slurring. I love that the ads always end by saying "drink responsibly." I guess that's their way out of feeling responsible for the addiction of so many people.

I'm so glad to be sober today. I too cannot & will not buy into any kind of thinking that those ads engender. I'm working hard on the gratitude attitude as opposed to the deprivation attitude. I'm not depriving myself of anything.

I'm having people over for dinner Friday night. There will be wine, but I won't be drinking. On Saturday, I'm taking my g-sons out in the AM, & I'm going to be up, ready, & hangover-free for that excursion.

Mary

[startingover]

Daily AF Thread - Wednesday December 10

Good morning all!

DG, thoughts of drinking and driving absolutely terrify me. My dad used to do it with me in the car...horrible..

Greenie, that is amazing!!! Well done!
I know exactly what you mean about the "who will I be" questions.
I think you are very brave and you give me inspiration. Thank you!

Have a great day everyone!

[retteacher]

Daily AF Thread - Wednesday December 10

Hi Cindi: We cross-posted. I hope you're doing well. I think about you every day I come here. I hope you're family is well, particularly your daughter who is pregnant. Our Jimmy is doing fine. AA has really done wonders for him. After years of drinking & drugging, his personality is coming out. I never realized just how much it hindered him. I had a conversation w/him the other day. It was lively & intimate...something I can't remember having for a long time, if ever. I do feel grateful today for our sobriety. Mary

[charlee]

Daily AF Thread - Wednesday December 10

Morning all...will catch up later...off to bring my eldest with the broken leg to work.....2 more weeks till the cast comes off..yipee!!!......

[AAthlete]

Daily AF Thread - Wednesday December 10

Doggygirl;491425 wrote: ...AA- we are going through some stress with our business right now (along with 99% or more of the population in this economy) and I have been guilty of getting self centered and a bit in pity party mode about it.

Thanks DG, and you in turn have reminded me what I should be thankful for. I am truly blessed that the biggest worry I have in my life is the damage I did to my car. Today I am employed, have a nice roof over my head, have a wonderful family, am healthy and sober. There are so many people, especially in these tough economic times, that have issues far beyond mine and I need to remember to be humble and grateful for the gifts that I have.

Have a great Wednesday everyone - it's wonderful to see everyone posting here so early in the morning! :wd:

[A Work in Progress]

Daily AF Thread - Wednesday December 10

Good morning everyone! Greenie, that was wonderful, what you did at that meeting! You're my hero of the day. I need to do stuff like that. Actually, I am making more of an effort lately to get out among human beings again, spending time with old friends (yes! I actually DO have old friends, and have neglected the friendships... ). And, this morning I am going, finally, to the Y I just joined (last week). My intro fitness assessment was cancelled on me, and re-scheduled, and yesterday we had some snow, which was a great excuse for me to stay off the streets...

DG that's interesting stuff about the new DWI laws in your state. I hate to think about the number of times I drove while drinking, and sometimes while very much intoxicated. Appalling. Another example of how putting alcohol into our brain causes us to do things that are totally inconsistent with our values. Over and over again, too.

Ads for liquor: Yes. Horrible lies. Yesterday someone mentioned watching an episode of "Boston Legal," which always had a part at the end of the episodes in which the guys would be sitting out on a lovely porch, having a drink. It used to be a big trigger for me, because the setting and conversation made it look so... lovely... Now I am deliberately thinking about those scenes and, in my mind, calling the drinks they are having "glasses of brown poison." I was a whisky drinker, so photos in advertising, movies, etc. of beautiful crystal glasses with whisky in them used to trigger all kinds of craving for me... it helps immeasurably to deliberately re-label the thoughts in my head...

[beatle]

Daily AF Thread - Wednesday December 10

Those are some sobering thoughts about drinking and driving. Where I live (Skandinavia), the punishments are so severe for drinking and driving that most people don't even consider taking one drink if they are going to drive. In a way, I think that's a good thing, because it removes any chance of risk taking (i.e., "How many drinks can I have and still stay under the limit?" or "I can have just one glass of wine... or maybe two...").

At one point, the limit here was .005%-- but they had to adjust that as drivers would test positive from taking cough medicine, or even drinking some juices. My father-in-law, in fact, tested positive once after eating a bunch of plums, which must have fermented in his stomach. He hadn't had a drink for days beforehand. (And he was the Mayor of the town!). Anyway, the limit now is .02%-- I think.

The police here regularly block off roads and breath-test drivers randomly. At Christmastime, they increase these roadblocks and extend the times. One of the times when people sometimes get caught, though, is when they drive the morning after they have been drinking a lot. For this reason, many people keep breathalyzers in their homes.

We have one my husband bought a few years ago, and I am both proud and embarrassed to say that I used it regularly (secretly) before driving the kids to school in the morning, etc., because I would never risk drinking and driving-- not just because of the risk of a penalty, but also because of what Cindi said-- I would never have been able to forgive myself if I hurt anyone.

I am happy to say that I have not had to use that handy contraption for many months, and in fact, I don't even know where it is.

Have a good Wednesday!

[AAthlete]

Daily AF Thread - Wednesday December 10

One of the things that I have noticed is the lack of education about drinking and intoxication. Plenty of ads that say to drink responsibly, but what does that mean? I would love to see more education about it here in the states - maybe even start putting some questions on the drivers tests to really get people to start thinking about it.

Beatle, I know what you mean about harming a child. I'll share a story because I think I need to get it out as it has been rattling around in my head off and on...

When Josh was 4 or 5 years old I was playing in the back yard with him. He liked sitting on top of the swingset with me so I hauled him up there and we were just hanging out and looking around. I decided that I wanted to be the good father and have my arms around him so I went to swing a leg over him and hit him instead in the side of the head... Knocked him off the swingset and watched him fall to the ground below where he landed on the back of his neck and shoulders....

Luckily he was fine and bounced right up from it, but I was stone drunk when it had happened and if he had been hurt I don't know how I could ever have forgiven myself. In my recovery I had made lists of people whom I had wronged and apologized to them, but how would you apologize for something like that? How do people who have killed someone while drinking and driving ever learn to live with themselves.

I do not dwell on that story as the pain is sometimes a little too real even now many years later. I have to remind myself that I did do stupid things, but somehow by the grace of God everything turned out okay and I need to be thankful for that. I can't change the past but I can do my best to make sure I never put my family at risk like that in the future, right?

[Evie.Lou]

Daily AF Thread - Wednesday December 10

Happy Wednesday to ALL, I was surprised that even at a Disney Theme park(world show case EPCOT) there was so much Drinking this time of year.
Of course there is always the wines of Italy and France and the Beers of Germany and the UK but every country had out specialty liquors and they had drink stands set up for Special Margaretta's ETC.
Everywhere I looked, people were drinking.I didn't CAVE but was TEMPTED, for sure !!!!

[namaste]

Daily AF Thread - Wednesday December 10

Good Morning,
18 days AF.
I guess my husband might be living in denial or something, but early on in this economical whatever it is that is going on, we just decided not to partcipate and so far have yet to feel any impact except the relef from the high gas prices that were killing us since he drives a big van full of tools 45-55 miles to Atlanta and .back to work every day. We be kind of been walking around with an attitude of "welcome to our world people" because for the most part we've been self employed and made choices that had us give up the safety net...call us fools, and we may regret it one day, but it feels good to know that nobody can fire us...but it is a real motivator, I don't have a 401k or a retirement plan, my retirement
plan is going to have to be (1) my health so I don't need expensive healthcare (2) payoff debt (2) payoff mortgag (3) save. So I have a few good prime years here and we are getting busy doing what
God gave us gifts to do, we are grateful that we have seen no decline whatsoever in business, he is a carpenter and does home repair and I'm a designer helping buisnesses look good so that they can co pete and be succesful. I do his marketing. We try to focus on being of service and e noting the relationships in work. We're optimistic and I choose to stay that way.

I have intellectualized my alcoholism to death at times..the ego loves it. My therapist, the priest, mind you, like to call it intellectual masturbation. I have to be careful even here because it's tempting to want to say something clever and profound.. There is that fine line between sharing experience, strength and hope and engaging in, well, I'll call it im for short, intellectual masturbation. Artist and alcoholics are partculay good at it, as are lawyers and any other creative types...we love to be clever. Remember how clever we can be at hiding those bottles, and how easy it is to lie?

It's the same thing we do with the moderation thing. I also did it she. I went into therepy. I loved, loved, loved coming in each week having devoured another book of philosophy, depth psychology, some pretty heavy stuff, and my therapist humored me for the longest time.. but the truth was, in some ways I was still binging.. So I guess all this boils down to something I think AA said about his addiction, I think our addictions have their own little neuro pathways...and harmones and emotions play a big part in the physical aspect of my addiction...my addiction is to fill that void, and it doesn't really matter what it is I choose to fill it with. If I choose alcohol, it wlll immediatly be plugged into into that addictive channel and then I become an alcoholic, if I were to choose pot, same thing...pain killers, same thing. I haven't smoked a joint in 15 years, but if it's around, available, easy...and I'm struggling, it's dangerous.
When I don t have substances, then my ego will step in and try seduce and charm me, so beware, at least it won't get me a DUI, it doesn't have calries a d it sometimes works in business, so what the heck, let the im have it's moments from time to time, shall we?

Ok, enough rambling. Feeling pretty good, the cold is a little sneaky...I think it's gone then it shows up again in the afternoon so I need to just move slowly through the next few days so I don't relapse to the flu like state I was in.

Have a great day all
Namaste