AF Daily Thread- Friday, December 12

[retteacher]

AF Daily Thread- Friday, December 12

AA: I know that I drank to run away from fear, but it did nothing but increase it...like a cancer. It got to the point where I was afraid to even drive my car on the highway. I'm slowly getting out from under all that. And yes, it's good to welcome opportunities (fear, resentment, anxiety, etc.) to work through & come out the other side. How else are going to know we've progressed? Bad things happen all the time. I want to be a person who doesn't need AL to deal w/them...like millions of other people do. Mary

[beatle]

AF Daily Thread- Friday, December 12

First of all, Cinid, this sounds like a positive step forward. Actually, it sounds like an OBVIOUS step forward.

This treatment (Sinclair method), if it works, may become the clear way to rehabilitation for alcoholics in the future. The theory and scientific evidence thus far seem to be compelling, if not totally convincing.

People like you, Cindi, and me, who try and try and try, and do long sober periods, and LOVE it and swear they will never drink again and then slip again and again-- well, maybe we are not as "strong" as all those who have done this through sheer will-power.

Well, I use a hell of a lot of will-power, every minute of every day (in more ways than just fighting AL), and still I keep slipping. Does this mean I am a weak, spineless, hopeless person? Many people would say yes. I know that's not true, though, about any of us here.

I think the point of the Sinclair method is to erase the positive pathways in the brain that alcohol ingrains. Isn't that EXACTLY what we here, all of us, are trying to do, in one way or the other?

We use supplements, we use spiritual tools, we use friends and sharing (not least, here on MWO), we remind ourselves of our goals, we think about our families, we grab at every way we can to keep ourselves sober.

If this Naltrexone/Campral thing works, it is the right tool for you. God knows you have tried all else. And as for me, I will do it, too, if I can, because I want to be DONE with this. I am sober now (despite the minor slip last night) and I believe I can remain sober... but just how many times have I felt this way?

At the same time, we all know there is no "magic pill"... this is just a part of the solution to a great big cosmic puzzle that we all are piecing together in our own way.

And yes, as always WIP, you are right about my slip-- I cannot just let it go. I need to work on understanding what the trigger was, why it happened, and become better prepared.

Ok, that was my long-winded MM (mental masturbation-- I'm not using the term "Intellectual Masturbation" because intellectualism seems to have got such a bad name these days-- like, why should an American president be able to speak a foreign language, or even do well in college? It's so out of style to be intellectual these days! Plumbers rule!)

Happy Friday night to all!

[SAUSAGE]

AF Daily Thread- Friday, December 12

Hi everyone
First opportunity to check in today!
I've been to my work Christmas lunch - just got back - stayed to the very end. It was great, I didn't drink (a lime and lemonade at the bar first, and then just water with the meal) I really enjoyed myself, had a great time, know I wouldn't have enjoyed it any more if i'd been drinking. There was no pressure to drink, no-one seemed interested really, loads of people commented on my weight loss and how well I looked - people whom I hadn't seen for several months, since i've been AF. This boosted my confidence. Only one person asked me if I was driving and if that was why I wasn't drinking - I couldn't lie as I walked there, so I said " no I just don't drink in the middle of the day - it makes me feel awful" and no-one questioned it further. Towards the end it was interesing seeing people very inebriated and how they behaved, and listening to some of the things they said, that they probably wouldn't have talked about sober!

All in all, I'm feeling much more positive about AF social events - not just that I can achieve them (I was sure I could by sheer willpower) but that I can actually enjoy them at the same time , and I'm now feeling much more positive about the festive season ahead....and I won't have a hangover in the morning!!!

Have a good AF Friday and weekend everyone!

[Waiting for his way out]

AF Daily Thread- Friday, December 12

Well guys and gals.. Tommorrow is my Office Christmas party and I am a little concerned about my hubby. Although it has not been a problem for a few years, he once embarrassed me greatly in front of all my co-workers. But, I am trying to keep faith and trust in him today. hard to do when i found a little bottle under his desk this week "he put it there to remind him to throw it away" I had to respond "and your dog ate the homework" maybe not too bright but that's all I could think of at that moment.
We have made peace, one more time.

[AAthlete]

AF Daily Thread- Friday, December 12

Waiting, as a guy who used to the the bottle hider I can say that I feel for you. I became the master of fast excuses, and was actually fairly proud of some of them until I sobered up and realized how bad they actually sounded.

As you put it, all you can do is keep the faith and trust him for today, as you can't push or browbeat him into changing no matter how hard you try. I can't tell you how many times I lied to my wife, and every time she would lose a little more trust in me until she was ready to walk out the door. By the grace of God I got one more chance and finally decided to turn my life around.

I hope that the party turns out well for you.

[Guest]

AF Daily Thread- Friday, December 12

I must say that deleting old threads is very therapeutic. I've been sober for over 3 years and I remember ALL those people I welcomed.. so where are they? Are they sober? Are they helping others? Who would know.. I certainly dont.

Where is the success on this board? Where is it.. is it quantified.. how is it quantified? How can someone new find out some facts about what has long term success? What is long term success? Is it a month sober? Is success having one week sober? Is it? Is it being sober just for today? Is success modding on a medication that has side effects? Is success the number of posts you have or the number of friends? Is success the number of hits on the site or the number of members? Is success holding someones hand while they slip? Is it? I'm not answering these questions but I think they are worthy of being asked.

This is serious stuff to me. To me, this is about my life and living. Its no joke. I have never fought as hard or against such odds as I did to get sober. I will not give up on myself. I will not.

What are we aiming for here.

[Doggygirl]

AF Daily Thread- Friday, December 12

Hi everyone! The party last night was successful from the AF standpoint anyway. I can see why non-drinkers don't attend every party they can find, and why they politely leave early when they DO attend. It's pretty disgusting to be around a bunch of drunk people. That has me rather introspective about exactly what I used to be, and has left me even more determined, if that's possible, to not ever return to that drunk person I was. Our local state senator is quite the drunk and this has never been a secret that I know of. But especially in light of the public showcasing these days of EXACTLY how ugly IL / Chicago politcs are, it was a bummer seeing him once again, "hugging" the room and breathing bourbon in everyone's face. Other than that Mrs. Lincoln, The Jacob Henry Mansion sure is beautiful, especially decked out for the holidays.

Welcome to johnnyh!! No way I can moderate either. Depending on who does the asking, one of my now standardized responses to "why aren't you dirnking?" is "because I don't want just one, I want all of 'em, and that wouldn't be fair to you, now would it?"

WIP, I can't imagine how difficult this estate sale must be for you, especially since your Mom has not passed yet. I will keep you in my thoughts! I know you have done (and continue to do) your very best by your Mom, so please have no regrets.

Sausage, congratulations on a successful lunch! Come on now....where's the gossip????

Waiting, I wish you well for your holiday party tomorrow. Yours is a challenging position to be in - I have read some of your posts. Your husband is very fortunate to have you in his life. I hope he comes 'round before it's too late.

OMW - I think volunteering to drive is a very good strategy that just takes the choice right off the table. I'm going to put that one in my bag of tricks for future reference.

AA I love your insightful posts. I hope to someday understand myself as well as you understand yourself. It's a challenging but rewarding process, isn't it.

Mary I'm sure your dinner party tonight will be a great success. You must be an excellent cook and hostess - you entertain a LOT. I would love to hear some of your tips on how you plan menus and just generally organize for a nice dinner party.

Kap - I'm like you. If I decided to have "one" drink - I would SO be busy obtaining a stash it would make your head spin! Beatle, amazing you got through it without AL defining a backup booze plan.

Cinders - I don't blame you for trying out all your options.

Brigid, boy you are not kidding this journey is NOT for the faint of heart!

Hello to LVT and Evie and and anyone I might have missed!

I was very happy to be up and at 'em this morning and hangover free. It's been a busy day in a GOOD way and I never would have gotten this much done if I hadn't stayed sober last night.

Have a great rest of the day all!

DG

[Tiresias]

AF Daily Thread- Friday, December 12

I'm always amazed at just how individual each journey is, but yet there are so many many shared experiences, feelings, emotions, reactions, beliefs, and caring empathic souls who reach out.

I can't seem to gather much in the way of thoughts to share today. I feel motivated to contribute, but I'm either too scattered or empty of something to grab onto well enough to express (to myself much less in a post to others).

I'll simply repeat that if you are sincerely trying to better your situation you deserve much respect and admiration, and I'll add my ongoing wishes for good luck and successes in reaching your goals.

[LVT25]

AF Daily Thread- Friday, December 12

The community coalition on alcohol and our youth has me bursting with enthusiasm. I had so much to contribute (and will, when the time comes) because of what I've learned these past 9 months at MWO! It was also fun to visit with my peers about substance abuse. I think we could have gone on for hours! One more benefit to being sober.
I'm lovin it right now!!

[ready2change]

AF Daily Thread- Friday, December 12

Good job LVT....I'm so glad you found MWO and it is working for you.

How kind of you to "pay if forward" to your community. Isn't it a great feeling to be "bursting with enthusiasm?" Keep up the fantastic attitude, it's catchy!

R2C

[brittzak]

AF Daily Thread- Friday, December 12

Just wanted to say that I have read today......very ill with sinus infection and bronchititis.....will be back soon.