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    Sunday, July 23, 2006

    Geeeeeeeeez...

    I go away for a couple of days and y'all up and move on me?

    Hey stainers, this is irjanedoe2. Yeah, I had to get a new name 'cuz I got lost in registration hell! I have not read your posts yet.

    The funeral was... well... like nothing I'd ever seen before (In a good way). Instead of giving a traditional eulogy the preacher read specific exerpts from my Grandmothers' journals, which she'd written and kept her entire adult life. He said he wanted my Granny to tell her own life story. And what a tale she told! She described events in her life... from the every day mundane to sublime joy and even unbearable grief. And all the while her faith, gratitude and trust in her Lord remained constant. What a strong woman!

    Brace yourselves for this... She actually wrote a letter to us, her family, in one of her journal entries. It was titled, "Don't mourn for me". It was a beautiful writing that consolidated her life events, loves and Gods' blessings from her perspective. She spoke of making snow angels, gardening, putting her toe in lakes, rivers and oceans, loving, having babies & grandbabies, cooking many meals(some good, some not so good), etc... I lost it big time, when she told of how she was blessed to hold her grandbabies and to hear them say "I love you". Her ending words in that entry were, "I'd like to be missed... But don't mourn for me." and then something about being with her Lord that I can't remember to quote for you...

    Bottom line... I'll miss my Granny so much, but am so glad she had a kind of celebration of her life and after life service instead of a sad mourning. She wanted that! And at 95 yrs old ... She deserved that!

    I had asked my "Granny" waaaaaaaaaay back when if I could have her journals, when she didn't need them anymore. I have an aweful lot of them now. The rest are with my Auntie. I wish I had them all, but they are where they are supposed to be.

    Hugs,
    Jane

    P/S... My little dog died this week too. She was old but my constant companion. It's been a sad week.

    Been having trouble sleeping. Hope y'all don't mind if I post first today...

    #2
    Sunday, July 23, 2006

    I'm so sorry to hear about your Granny and your little doggie. You must be having a right ole time of it. My thoughts are with you Jane :l

    I am new to this thread - today is my 5th day of Abstinence with the help of Librium. Down to 3 tablets a day for next 3 days then 2 for 2 days then 1 for last day. then i go it alone !!
    Have ordered the new CD's and the book as well as Kudzu. Also bought super evening primrose when went food shopping yesterday. About these amino acids. - I have a bottle of - it's called 'Miracle Burn@ it's a herbal concoction with all kinds of root thingies and vit B6 and it says amino acid complex. - do you think it would be ok to take these? I think I might buy the L- Glutamine - do you think it's worth it because I really don't want to go down the campral route. I don't think that th GP's in England are happy about prescribing Topa from what I've read of other poeples posts - I'd rather just stay herbal.
    As for abstinence. I cannot go any other way. I've fooled myself in the past that 1 glass of wine want harm - and have even popped into the pub ( on my own) aaahhh when I was abstaining , whilst out shopping and although just stopped at the one there - NEEDED to stop at the off licence on the way home and buy a bottle, then thought what the hell, it's buy 2 get one free - ' it's makes more sense' !!! I told myself. Back on that slippery slope again !! So for me it's all or nothing.
    I envy people who can take it and then just leave it but I need more more and more. So this thread is exactly wahat I need to help me keep on that straight and narrow. Just had a cup of coffee - would LURVE a glass oh wine tho !!!
    Keep up the good work.
    Love and hugs on this beautiful sunny sunday morning.
    Bambino
    xxx :h
    ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~


    Bambs aka Hydrogen



    :h XXX :h

    Comment


      #3
      Sunday, July 23, 2006

      Sober Sunday!

      Good morning everybody and welcome to sober Sunday.
      Day 2 for me now. I just want to say that I am going to allow myself to enjoy getting to know you all and not put myself under any pressure to "say the right thing" I want to focus on myself for now if thats ok I want to keep my head down and just get through my first few weeks of abstinence. So please don't think I am a selfish so and so if I seem to just take from you all for a while. I have really needed somewhere like this community just to say hey I haven't had a drink today, and to know you know how good that makes me feel.

      I took me ages to get to sleep last night, but I remember reading a post somewhere that 2 hours of alcohol free sleep was more refreshing than 7 hours of stupor. I woke early this morning feeling heavy, lethargic, like a thickness in my body if that makes sense. Its as if I have become aware of the toxicity of my body, something I don't feel so readily in a hung over state. I wish i had the sups now.

      Last night I even made a chocolate fondue for my son and his sleep over guest around 9pm. If my sleepover guest had been around, ie sultry shiraz I would have fobbed my boy off no probs.

      Anyway thanks to you all - I hope you can get some joy out of the rest of your weekend whatever your circumstances. I APPRECIATE YOU

      Carole

      Comment


        #4
        Sunday, July 23, 2006

        THIS was the post I typed last night for this morning....

        Jeez People--I spent HOURS last night typing the post for this morning and THEN I went and called it "Saturday" instead of "Sunday"---:s Of course, it SEEMED like Saturday since I was still up!!

        So anyway, y'all, I've copied it to this thread (thanks, Jane and NOW I know where you are--I was wondering last night as you'll see at th bottom of this LONG post....so sorry about your sad week...your grandmother sounds like an amazing woman!) It's great to see you here again today, Carole!! Take whatever you need, girlfriend! And, a big, big welcome, Bambino!

        Okay, so here it is--last night's post, meant for Today,
        SUNDAY, July 23.....

        Good Morning, Absville!
        Well, I know it's been said before but I am just constantly overwhelmed by the stories people share on these boards...yesterday, I spent the afternoon reading all the new posts--and weeping...first with sadness and then with joy...it's so incredibly sad that people are feeling so hopeless and despairing in their struggle with alcohol--and yet there is so much true joy in seeing people take heart when they come on this site and then seeing those same people begin to offer hope to the next person courageous enough to share their struggle....we are all part of this amazing community of people around the world coming together to help each other...boy, I'm beginning to tear up again...but in a good way, in a good way...thank you, all....


        And to all the folks here, congrats on just doing it, on having, well, the GUTS to start this journey--sure there are potholes (and do I know about potholes!), and unexpected detours but, you know, that's how journeys tend to be...not linear but holistic...not what you expected but what you need...

        Nancy, thanks for sharing about your friend...it's way past time that we began to honor our elders and listen to their wisdom....


        Kim, hope you had a great day with the boys--let us know what they're up to!

        Kris, don't let your guests drive you completely bonkers! Sounds like you're doing great in a situation that would have sent me screaming! Check in here for support!

        Lori--the beach sounds wonderful...hope you're getting a chance to enjoy it...as for being "trashed"? Better the house than you, right?!!!

        Sophia/Carole (or Wise Carole!)--it's great to see you here--and isn't it wonderful to realize just how much money we're saving by not buying cases of wine, kegs of beer and liters of vodka, rum, scotch--whatever!! I keep allowing myself little treats as a reward for not drinking--because I CAN!! And I DESERVE it! When I think of just HOW MUCH I was spending on that dreadful stuff that was literally poisoning my mind and my body, and destroying my life...what WAS I thinking??? Well, I guess I wasn't THINKING at all....

        Matt, you're OUR hero!! Thanks for all the great advice you share with us...and how many days have you racked up now, guyfriend??!! Cheering you all the way!

        Kathy, love it that you're here with us in Absville! I also spend far too much time here reading (weeping!) and getting inspired--but compared to how much time I spent thinking about wine, getting wine, drinking wine, hiding wine and then recuperating from wine--well, actually there IS no comparison, right??

        Deirdre, how was the beach? Or did the rain keep you home? This weather is totally out of control! One minute it's sunny, the next we're having a total MONSOON! On the other hand, at least we still have electricity--unlike thousands of others in the area.....

        But you're right--this IS life. This is LIFE! What on earth were we waiting for??!!

        Living in LA, jump in anytime! The water's just fine... As for help, that we got lots of around here...

        Did I get everyone who popped in yesterday?? If not, I'll catch you tomorrow for sure...

        And, I know some folks aren't here (Gabby, I KNOW I saw you somewhere else today! How ya doing, girlfriend??)--and where's Jane?? How's Marcie?? Inquiring minds want to know....

        Okay, time for bed (now I'm gonna HAVE to sleep in....lol)
        :h
        susan
        (aka, Clever Clogs!! Love, love, love it! Thanks, Bambino!)


        It is important to remember that at first flush, going sane feels just like going crazy.
        Julia Cameron
        "I'm a sucker for a good resurrection story." Anne Lamott

        Comment


          #5
          Sunday, July 23, 2006

          Sunday, July 23.

          Hi Everyone.

          Jane. Your Grandmother must have been a wonderful, wonderful woman.Your post touched me and my heart goes out to you.I know fond memories will comfort you. Sorry about your dog too.

          Well,Day28.Yippee Although neary sliped on Sat. I took a beer out the fridge then put it back. It went in and out the fridge like a yoyo for the next couple of hours. The inner conflict. I argued with myself the whole time.You know the story(had a bad day,well i did have a bad day but could have been worse)In the end my good side won, but OMG it was hard.Will be better prepared this week and try not to let my guard down.

          Bambino. cong on day5. Glad your here. I'm from the UK too but been living in oz for the past 7 years.Still miss our lovely country but not the weather.

          Carole. cong on day2 I know you can do this.You take all you need and do whats right for you.I know,just getting your head round all this stuff is hard enough to begin with.Good luck:l

          Hope everyone has had a good weekend. lluf

          Comment


            #6
            Sunday, July 23, 2006

            sorry janie poo

            My dear Jane,
            Oh how I would love to give you a huge hug. All I can do all the way over here is tell ya I love ya and I am glad to be able to say....that you are my cool new friend. :l
            So sorry about your Granny and your doggie.

            so sorry i gotta run
            I have to work a 10 day stretch so I will really just be poppin in and out. yuck gabs
            Gabby :flower:

            Comment


              #7
              Sunday, July 23, 2006

              shoot me please

              Drank last night. I have some real thinking to do. I want and need abs so bad. Something over takes me--guess its the addiction to alcohol. Feel like a battered woman--how many times am I going to let alcohol have its way with me? I keep kicking it to the curb, for it to return when I am weak. This sucks....the grass is greener in Absville....

              Comment


                #8
                Sunday, July 23, 2006

                Happy Sunday!

                Hello All!
                I'm happy it's Sunday, and the weekend is almost over. I'm almost there and can get back into my routine, which makes it easier for me. The first weekend is always the worst. Keeping busy and being in chat has made a lot of difference for me this weekend, and of course, my pal topa!
                Hey, Kim, just keep kicking that booze back to the curb! One of these days, it will go away for good! Have you read the thread on the "extreme addiction" (I think that's it...) that RJ posted? It may help to explain a little about why we sometimes slip against all reason....not an excuse, mind you, but it might help to explain why. At any rate, you are always welcome to keep trying in Absville!!:h
                Good job, lluf! I've been in that place before, but usually the wine won, so I am very impressed with your victory!!
                Yes, Kris, try not to go crazy!!!
                Thanks for all the support, Susan, including staying up WAAAYYYY past your bedtime!!:h It's good to see you feeling better. I had a friend who used to say, "This, too, shall pass," when I was down. It annoyed the sh*t out of me then, but I have since come to realize that she was right, and now I repeat it to myself when I am down in the dumps, and it helps.
                Congrats on day 2, Carole, keep up the good work!

                I'm glad the librium is helping Bambino. You must be proud of yourself to have stopped. You won't be totally alone, though, you will have us. Keep checking in. I like to think that we are as much fun as booze!!! You'd be amazed at how silly we can get on chat at times even though most people aren't drinking! I think that we alkies are amazingly fun and creative people, with or without the booze! At any rate, I hope that you will consider the campral if the going gets tough. It is supposed to be very helpful.
                At any rate, it's just a thought! We'll all be here to keep you company, whatever you decide to do!

                Tiara Jane, I love your new name! So elegant! You have had quite a week, but befitting your name, you seem to be handling it with dignity and grace. Your Granny sounds like one remarkable woman!! You will have many interesting hours reading through her journals...... I'm sorry about your dog, as well. Dogs are such true and trusting companions. My thoughts will be with you this week.

                Gabby, take good care as you start out on your grueling work stint!! Whew, it makes me tired to think about it!!!

                MS;">Hi to you too, Matt, not having posted yet!!!!
                At any rate, my game plan today is grocery shopping and doing some cooking so that I don't have to cook too much throughout the week. I find that it is some consolation for not drinking to have good and healthy food around to eat that requires minimal preparation. I used to drink while making dinner, so at least for a while, I'd like to take away THAT trigger, and just have some good stuff that I can microwave. Haha!! Beat myself at my little game!
                That's all for now! You're probably glad, since it looks like I've written a dang book!!
                Hugs to all, Kathy

                PS< What is this?? You can only use 4 images in your message?? That really sucks for an emoticon intensive person like me!! They just told me I had to take some of the emoticons out of my message and limit it to four!!!! Urrrrrgggh!
                AF as of August 5th, 2012

                Comment


                  #9
                  Sunday, July 23, 2006

                  This isn't a "real" post--I just want to bump this thread up above the misnamed "Saturday" thread--boy, I really screwed this up today...

                  Please check in on both so that no one gets overlooked because they posted on the OTHER thread for today....jeez, I am SO sorry that I've created all this confusion...:s

                  I'll check back again later--hang in there, everyone!! We're all in this together!
                  :l
                  susan
                  "I'm a sucker for a good resurrection story." Anne Lamott

                  Comment


                    #10
                    Sunday, July 23, 2006

                    Hiya All, it was day 51 yesterday and proberly the hardest for me upto now.I have got no idea why, things have been going really well latley.
                    Thinking about it its proberly an accumilation of a lot of small things,but it surprised me, i thought i was past the worst. Very nearly went to the off licence, i had a bit of a conflict going on in my head like i was arguing with myself,reasons why i should and reasons why i should'nt.
                    Then it got to 10 pm when our shop shut and i was fine....
                    It was our wedding anniversary yesterday (reason to celebrate with drink) and a lot of my wifes family came upto to visit her parents and they all went out to the pub,While we were stuck at home because i could,nt go...just not ready to go to a pub yet and not drink.felt really sorry for my wife being stuck in with me while i was in a sh*t mood.
                    I feel a lot better this morning and am sooo glad i did'nt drink last night, just got to find a way to make it upto my wife bigtime for spoiling our anniversary...
                    Any good ideas would be welcome.....
                    Speak to you all soon.....Think im gonna like it here
                    __________________
                    LOOK AT IT THIS WAY.........
                    IT CANT GET ANY WORSE.............
                    LOOK AT IT THIS WAY.........
                    IT CANT GET ANY WORSE.............

                    Comment


                      #11
                      Sunday, July 23, 2006

                      oops posted on yesterday

                      Hi Abs friends,

                      Thanks Susan for your ever considerate acknowledgements of all of us you are a sweetheart.

                      Welcome to Bambino and Sohpia Yeah the more the merrier!

                      Can I share a story with you guys that describes perfectly why two are always better than one in this endeavor? Yesterday I had this wedding to go to and was really looking forward to it. Good friends of ours' daughter married a great guy. First my husband said he didn't want to go, then he wanted to wear shorts, whine whine whine.... Such a nice outdoor ceremony beautiful entrance, decorations, food, cake, VERY festive. Not two minutes after the couple said "I do", my husband started to walk to the car. Of course I was welcome to stay and get a ride home I greeted the happy couple and rode home a very sad wife. I hated leaving because of my husband's anti-social personality. We can't have couples for friends becuse HE doesn't need or want any. I like people and have lots of friends, but our social married life is non-existant. I cried silently all the way home, then lost it in my bedroom when home.

                      Now for the way out. I called a friend of mine who went through treatment six months ago but doesn't do meetings. We talk everyday on the phone since she lives with a fairly unsupportive drinker too. Of course I was pretty upset while talking to her and just about to say F-it. She made me feel a little better then we hung up. A minute or two later, she called back and suggested we go to the reception together (she knew the family too). I said, Well I can sit here having a pity party or go with her and have fun. Well we did go and we both had a sober BLAST. I'm sure everyone there expected us to make asses of ourselves as usual (it's a very small town) But we didn't! We danced to our friend's band and watched OTHER people make asses of themselves.

                      So there you go. We both helped eachother more than we know. YOU all here help me more than YOU know. I love and appreciate something in every post. It all is important, good, bad or ugly.


                      Thanks for letting me share that with you.

                      Love,
                      Lori
                      Thanks for reading this longwinded but very therapeutic note


                      #5 Today, 08:09 AM

                      Comment


                        #12
                        Sunday, July 23, 2006

                        Awesome story

                        Hi All,

                        Lori that's an awesome story. You go girl!!!

                        Carole! So glad you've joined us! The up days in Abbeyland outnumber the down days. That's the truth.

                        Bambino! Welcome and consider getting one of the starter kits from the website. It's got everything you'll need and simplifies the process incredibly. If the cost is a deterrant compare it to booze. No comparison!

                        Welcome WayneUK. Big congrats on 51 days, that's awesome!

                        I was having pretty severe cravings yesterday as well (day 32), probably due to having dinner with my mother in law who can be a well,,, mother in law.

                        Any veterans out there with some guidance on when the periodic "craving episodes" might pass? I recall reading somewhere else that it was in 3 month range. Don't know if that's accurate but an end goal is always helpful it seems.

                        Woke up this morning feeling great and very proud that I told the little devil in my brain to go to hell last night.

                        All of you continue to amaze me and make me feel so grateful to have such awesome friends to share this amazing journey with. The road ahead is straight and clear if we just stop wasting time looking behind us.

                        Love Ya!
                        Matt

                        Comment


                          #13
                          Sunday, July 23, 2006

                          hi Wayne,
                          why not sing her that lovely song you posted in gen discussion. and stay sober I'm sure she appreciates that. lol

                          Comment


                            #14
                            Sunday, July 23, 2006

                            I want her to stay with me though...
                            LOOK AT IT THIS WAY.........
                            IT CANT GET ANY WORSE.............

                            Comment


                              #15
                              Sunday, July 23, 2006

                              Hi all, it really sounds like all is going well for the most part in absville, and I'm so glad! I've seen lot's of posts for cravings problems lately, and I know that summer fun and cellular memory have a lot to do with it, but I'm just wondering, will it help to space out the supplements throughout the day? It has helped me, not to take everything at once, when it's the evenings that leap out at me and I'm reaching for my gaba and phenibut...lol.

                              Perhaps the all in one, in divided doses in the am and the pm? Any thoughts on that? '-)

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