Evening all
Just had chance to catch up on today's thread.
Firstly - Cindi - good luck with your rehab, hope all goes well, and come back soon and tell us how you're going.
R2c - sorry to hear about your Dad - I have seen quite a few patients with trigeminal neuralgia (and Bells Palsy) and know how distressing both can be - hope his recovery goes well.
Hi to everyone else here - Marshy - your comment about John Lewis ( I know that particular store well - used to live in London!) and the decorations really summed up images for me too!!!
- which brings me back to DG's question at the start of the day - are relapses planned ie they don't just suddenley happen- Yes I definitely think so - the do seem to be pre-mediated -when I think back to my 2 major relapses in 2008;
- The first was on day 108 - a friend had been telling me earlier that day that I must be able to mod if I had the strength to do 107 AF days - so you deserve / can cope with the one glass!?! All afternoon I was going over this in my mind, justifying it, convincing myself she was right and then surprise surprise at 7.30 poured myself my first glass of wine.
- The second was my decision to drink on my holiday in Spain at end of Oct after 54 AF days -Looking back on this, going into the holiday I had a very negative attitude - didn't see how I could get through it AF - even started up a thread on here "going on holiday, scared i'll drink" On the flight there, I remember looking at adverts for wine in inflight magazines, and even a small film on the inflight entertainment - showing you places to visit - featured lots of people drinking in bars at cafes etc - and I know at that point I mentally decided it would be OK to drink on holiday, I could justify it, it's a holiday after all I deserve it and I can still say i'm AF in my own home - and of course I was well away from the support of MWO - I wouldn't have to post - no-one would know!!!! Guess what - within an hour or so of landing i'd had my first glass of wine!!!
I think this has been an interesting topic to dwell on, and just thinking about it and dwelling on it has made me stronger - these things like a relapse don't just happen, there's a run up to them like an aura before a fit or a migraine, - you see the signs, you know you're thinking about alcohol too much - you know it's a very dangerous time , you know when you start to rationalise with yourself, make excuses, justify stuff in your mind- it's time to act, time to refocus your mind, be strong and move on, distract yourself with something else.
Take care everyone and have a good AF weekend.
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