AF Daily Sun January 18th 2009

[SAUSAGE]

AF Daily Sun January 18th 2009

Evening all

Firstly AFM - sorry to hear this but dont' dwell on it, you can't change the past , just pick yourself up and start again - the worst thing you can do is dwell on it and continue drinking because you "blew it" on this one occasion.

In response to the question posed at the start of the thread - yes definitely I was more cranky at the beginning but this is just because you are aware of your surroundings, not just anaesthetising yourself to life's problems. Work through it, take things slowly, - something I don't practice what I preach! There's lots of good adivice on here.

Mary - stories of your dinner parties never cease to amaze me - you must have willpower of steel!! We rarely have people over for dinner in a big way but I find it hard if people do visit our home and drink - a lot harder than I do to stay sober in someone else's home. Hope you don't mind my asking, but do any of these people comment that you're not drinking? and if so what do you say. I find it harder to come up with excuses (eg I'm driving!) if it's in my own home particularly on a weekend when both normal and problem drinkers would think it perfectly acceptable to have a drink - or two!

Had a good day today, been to church with the kids, swam later on -pool very busy - I prefer it first thing at 7.30 when it opens. My daughter (aged 4) has been desperate to go to a Pizza Hut for a while so we did this for lunch today and had a nice family day out.

Will check back later

[Accountable for Me]

AF Daily Sun January 18th 2009

Thanks stargirl. Today is a new day; you are right.

I feel depressed but I know it is the after affects of drinking. It is a good reminder WHY I shouldn't drink.

They have to stop blaming me for everything that happened to my husband. He was an alcoholic with depression that was not being taken care of. It has almost been a year now; you would think they would just get on with their lives instead of lashing out at me.

I am not accepting any more phone calls and have blocked his father's email address.

Yes, he is cruel. The guy just had a friggen heart attack a few weeks back. You would think he would of simmered down a bit. This anger he spewed at me couldn't be doing him any good.

[retteacher]

AF Daily Sun January 18th 2009

Firstly, I don't have a spine of steel...just a lot of great friends here on this thread. Thank you.

I absolutely won't let anyone jeopardize my serenity & sobriety. It's too valuable to me. AFM, you are only accountable to yourself. You have no control over what other crazy people say & do. That's such a hard lesson for me to really "get." I have to just do the next right thing in my life & others can do what they have to do. Put this awful incident behind & go on w/your program. You are worth all the sobriety you have today.

Mary

[Accountable for Me]

AF Daily Sun January 18th 2009

Thanks, sausage. I won't dwell. I am just shocked.

[retteacher]

AF Daily Sun January 18th 2009

Sausage: Again, I don't feel particularly strong. As I mentioned earlier in the thread I did have a few moments of temptation, but now I know that if I can get through those, I'm home free. Most of our friends (normal drinkers) don't seem to notice. If they ask, I usually say that I'm:
-vulnerable to headaches.
-alcohol interferes w/my sleep pattern.
-alcohol gives me hot flashes.

My husb did comment on the fact that last night 2 1.5 L bottles of wh. wine was comsumed, along w/5 beers. We had Asian food which tends to be salty, so that could be why otherwise very mod drinkers went through so much. During our conversation, I reminded him that all that AL was consumed by 5 people because I didn't drink at all. He hadn't even noticed & seemed surprised. That feels so good to me. My non-drinking is becoming my own thing that's simply accepted.

Mary

[retteacher]

AF Daily Sun January 18th 2009

Don't worry...I won't get over-confident. But thank you to all of you for all the support. Without you, I wouldn't have been able to do it...no way! You can't imagine how important MWO is in my very new sobriety. I want to live in my world. There will be drinking around me...there's no getting away from it. Friends, family members etc. drink. I have to learn to coexist. One thing I make sure of though is that I do not have AL in the house. Especially open bottles. We did have 2 sealed bottles for a couple of weeks in preparation for last night's dinner. I'd never open them. That would be my undoing. Now that they are gone, we won't have anything in the house until we entertain again...which won't be for a while. Mary

[Accountable for Me]

AF Daily Sun January 18th 2009

retteacher;523571 wrote:

My non-drinking is becoming my own thing that's simply accepted.

Mary

That is where I want to be some day. Great stuff, Mary!

[Janice]

AF Daily Sun January 18th 2009

Hi there,

Hope you don't mind me crawling back out of the woodwork. I 'm not going to repeat all the stuff I've said so many times before but I'm fighting hard to make this Day 1, the first in a long time. Just wanted to say hi.

Janicexxx

[SAUSAGE]

AF Daily Sun January 18th 2009

Welcome back Janice!

[retteacher]

AF Daily Sun January 18th 2009

Welcome back Janice! This is such a wonderful thread. I hope you will continue to come. You have nothing to explain or feel uncomfortable about. You are you & are trying to put your life on the right path. Whatever happens in life is supposed to happen. I've had some very up-&-down times as well but feel a renewed sense of committment in 2009. Keep coming. Mary

[LVT25]

AF Daily Sun January 18th 2009

Hello friends,
I know it's pretty late in the day to be posting here, so I might copy and paste this on tomorrow's thread as well. I just have to get it out.

I can't get over how fast things change--overnight. Last night some friends were having a good time with their families. This morning, one family is without their 21 year old son, another family is without their dad/son/husband. Yet another alcohol related fatality. My God, will you please teach people not to drink and drive?!??!

What a shock to hear about this in Church this morning, after just seeing them last night.
Just makes me sick, I can't imagine how these families must be feeling right now.

We helped serve dinner to a big biker group last night before their "party/dance". I couldn't wait to get out of there so I wouldn't have to deal with the drunken behavior. Apparently I missed fights and lots of drama. I made the comment to my kids as to how glad I am to have quit drinking! Alcohol does way more harm than good. I hope someday more people can see that. I did say a prayer that all these partiers found their way home safely last night. The guys that were killed were at a different party. This is a small community, everyone knows everyone. What a sad, totally avoidable tragedy!

[retteacher]

AF Daily Sun January 18th 2009

Lvt: Recently, we went to a fundraiser for the daughter of a friend of ours. A drunk driver slammed into her as she was putting something in the trunk of her father's car. She had to have both her legs amputated above the knees. Awful. The fundraiser was for her prosthetics which are very expensive & not completely covered by her health insurance. Her poor father was in the car & probably saw the whole thing happen. Mary

[LVT25]

AF Daily Sun January 18th 2009

Mary--how awful! I have been trying to drill into my son's head why it is so scary for me to send him out on the road in a vehicle, but I guess it can happen anywhere.

Unfortunately, in this case, the 21 year old was apparently taking the older friend home after a party in a near-by town, lost control on a gravel road, and ejected them both. No seatbelts. We lost a friend in July (mother of 2) she had been drinking, a friend gave her a ride as far as her driveway, but as soon as he gave her the keys, she left. Her husband and son found her--no seatbelt either. Just happens way too often around here--I guess everywhere. So sad.

Thanks for your reply.:h

[hulagirl]

AF Daily Sun January 18th 2009

Gosh. So hard to take. I also live in a small community and when there are deaths, or someone is seriously injured, everyone is touched.
I was going to share my lighthearted AF day of hubby and I taking son out to lunch, eating out doors looking at the beautiful ocean water, before he flies off back to college tomorrow night, :upset:
But it not the right time.
Aloha

[LVT25]

AF Daily Sun January 18th 2009

Oh, please share Hulagirl---we ALWAYS need uplifting stories here!!:h Those are the moments in life we need to treasure most and remember not to take anything or anyone for granted!