Weekly AA Thread - Week of April 20 - 26

[borderboomer]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of April 20 - 26

I've had two really bad weeks. Last night I probably should have burned the house down after lighting a big fire while in La La Land. So today, I thought "ok another sign from God that its not my time." I am trying to work on less self-recrimination and moving forward. I am taking my Campral every 4-5 hrs. versus 8 and today, that seems to be helping.

You are very brave to be persistent and willing to try new ways to help yourself. While its very difficult to watch elderly parents towards the end, the other part of this is that your time with your mom is limited. Being "fully present" for her is a wonderful gift and I know that you can do it. We are very lucky to have more help available than ever before. As difficult as it is for our addicted brains, move forward and don't look back. Take care.

[Lucy Van Pelt]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of April 20 - 26

Hi guys-

I am so glad I got wind of this thread. I have to say that, I am a long-timer here on MWO, but rarely, rarely, post anymore. I do read a bit, and once in a while get on chat, but that is it. However, I have come to embrace AA, and feel like I belong here...so i hope you all don't mind my joining in.

First off, i have to reply to Don. I am so, terribly sorry to hear about your FIL. I know how awful that kind of diagnosis is, and I can only imagine what your wife is going through, as are you. I am so sorry. Also, regarding your "relapse". I have absolutely NO question that you will work this through, and get to a point that you get your head back together regarding drinking, and get yourself back to doing what is best for you. You have proven you have it in you, and it is just the matter of when you are ready.

For those of you who don't know me, I am someone who has wanted to stop drinking for many, many years, but have been unable to. Because, at that time of day, I just let my head do it's 180 and would drink. Anyway, I tried it all. AA, therapy, supps, medications...you name it.

Well, here is my status, as of now. I ended up back at AA, in desparation, back in December, and although I can't say I am 100% successful, I have found my "solution". I have gone to meetings basically every day for almost 5 months now. I have a sponser. I am beginning to work the steps. I had 4 + months until I relaped about 2 weeks ago. I am very sad about the relapse, but continue to move forward as best I can. I have come to realize the benefit of AA for me. I CAN NOT do this on my own....I can't. I am a cerebral person by nature...want to think things through and figure things out on my own, and cannot do this in regard to alcohol...because as much as I DO NOT want to drink, when my brain does its 180, I change my mind, and cave. If I don't listen to myself, and allow myself to realize that I am NOT right about my thoughts at these times, and ask for the help of others, I can get through these moments and invariably I am relieved I did not drink. That is how i am finding success. i do not yet quite grasp the whole thing about God, or about the need for spirituality at all, as I really just want to stop drinking, but I realize that others who are more successful than I am are telling me that this step program works, and i am willing to be open to what they have experienced.

So, that is my story at this point. I still believe there is more than one path to dealing with this problem, or at least there may be, but for me, at this time, this is the most successful that I have ever been. This alcohol problem is most definately "cunning, baffling, and powerful". It is such a "disease" of thinking...and I need to rely on others thoughts that seem much more reasonable than mine, at least when the urge to drink hits...

So, that is where I am. Thanks for listening to my story, and I am glad to be part of this.

Don, you are still my idol on this site and i just wish you and your family the best.

With love,

Beth

[Winefree]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of April 20 - 26

Lucy, I remember you from before and also felt I could lick this on my own with only the help of MWO or just doing it alone. It does not work! I continued to drink as well trying to cut back etc, but it didn't work. I am know in counseling and giving AA a try.
Here's hoping the added help will help all of us get through this to full recovery.

Winefree

[dlw]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of April 20 - 26

Don, Keep your thoughts open with us- we're all here in the good and bad times
Don't isolate yourself- keep posting, keep close- we're a family here!
And I will add your FIL to my prayer list.
Everyone Pray,
D