AF Daily - Friday June 26th

[dill]

Good morning!

I was thinking this morning about when I first started quitting alc. I was absolutely obsessed with thoughts of alc and was struggling mightily with the compulsion to drink! I am so grateful to be away from that now and to be able to look at it with objectivity. I recall that when I first started to quit, I had to channel my obsession in more "healthy" ways. I started to compulsively read books about alcohics and recovery. I looked for movies and song about that topic. I mean I HAD to have some contact with alc!!! It's really quite amazing to me in looking back, just how desperate I felt. I am grateful, so very grateful, to be past that and to be able to look at it with some objectivity.

Well, my bike is not road-worthy. The rear brakes are not working and the front tire won't hold air. The whole thing needs a lot of attention as it was stored for too long in our old barn and exposed to too much air/moisture fluctuations. I have to decide if I want to refurbish or buy new. I did take a spin in the driveway, and it felt really great!

I hope you all have a fab Friday!

[hiddengoal]

AF Daily - Friday June 26th

Morning AFreedom Riders!

Dill, nice post and reminder. It sure is refreshing to have some distance from those first days of struggle - those days and moments where we were constantly working at releasing the chains. Thanks for reminding me of my freedom.

As for the bike, do whatever you need to to get on it and ride, new or repaired. I bought a new bike last summer - it has been gold. I can't tell you how great it feels to go on a 15-25 mile ride. You can leisurely enjoy, or go for fitness in a fun way. "Just do it!"

Its summer here in North America - Enjoy it!

[dill]

AF Daily - Friday June 26th

Hidden, I see you live in the Great Lakes region. I grew up just 3 miles from Lake Erie. I used to ride my bike to the beach!

Aahhh, the sunset on Lake Erie...

[Lavande]

AF Daily - Friday June 26th

Good morning Dill, Hidden and everyone,

Woke up to overcast skies, typical hot & humid S.E. PA weather..........I'm sure the thunderstorms will roll thru later. But before they come I have to get out to harvest more raspberries. We have 50 ft. of rasberry vines that are just loaded - so many berries to pick. I'll freeze them until I decide what I'm going to actually do with them.

Dill, at this point I can actually say that I rarely think about drinking anymore. I too was obsessed with alcohol thoughts in the beginning. I have been around people drinking lately and it doesn't bother me a bit. I love that, it feels like true freedom

My grandson is turning 7 months old now and my daughter-in-law has decided to return to work. I am happy to say that I've been asked to babysit (part time). I am thrilled, I never would have been asked had I continued drinking. Back in the beginning of the year, I never would have thought this possible.

Moral of the story - Something new and good can happen for us each & every AF day. We need to stay focused, stay strong to keep these days coming

Have a wonderful day one and all!

[Cinders]

AF Daily - Friday June 26th

Wow. You inspire me, Dill, Hidden and Lavande.

I am still fighting the thoughts and sometimes losing. :-(

However, I will continue to fight.

Thank you all for posting. There is a light at the end of this tunnel.

Cindi

[greeneyes]

AF Daily - Friday June 26th

Morning abbers!

Thanks dill! I'm have a little OCD tendancy and can relate. Not drinking has helped that. You know, you could probably get a used bike if yours isn't worth refurbishing. Get a new helmet instead.

Hi hg! Hi cindi!

Lavende! Congratulations on 3 months!!! :goodjob::goodjob::goodjob:

I'm to leave town for a wedding today but my car had to be towed to the shop this AM. How nice it is to just take it in stride.I figure better to be towed from my driveway and leave me in the comfort of my own home than be somewhere on the road. AL never really let you see the positive side of things, you know?

This is the wedding that has me considering moderation. After all, it's been a year. That's dangerous for me. This is when posts like DG's and Chief's come in handy. They have been sitting in my toolbox and now is the time to use them. I will not drink. Period. I refuse to risk going back to the bad place where it is dark and scary.

So, on that note, have a good weekend!

[dill]

AF Daily - Friday June 26th

Cindi, I am by no means out of the woods! I still have lots of thoughts. I'm not saying I'm 'cured'. I am just contrasting my level of interest, now at the level of a 'preoccupation', to what it was then, raging obsession and compulsion. I think we all have varying levels of this and for some the compulsion must hang on longer than for others. But we can change! And it does get easier, as I have been told. Still have to work though. Sigh.

Hi, Lav and Greenie!

Here's one of the songs that helps me:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wj2Gi7hcrf0[/video]]YouTube - Montgomery Gentry - Some People Change

[Cinders]

AF Daily - Friday June 26th

Dill,

Wow.

Thank you for the song and the inspiration.

Love,
Cindi

[Determinator]

AF Daily - Friday June 26th

Alooooha Friday ABerooooos!

yeah yeah! the weekend!

Dill I can completely relate to your great thread-starter. I think recovery has to become an obsession to break the horrid cycle of addiction.

gotta run....long road trip today but I think I'll be able to come back home....wooo woooo!

be well my friends

[free bird]

AF Daily - Friday June 26th

Hellow Absters,

Wanted to pop in to say GOOD WORK to LAVANDE!!! You inspire me.

Approaching 30 days and wondering what's next??? Much anxiety associated with this too I might add.

Det -- I love the Oracle. Absolutely one of my favorite movies.

Everyone -- Have a good weekend.

[Accountable for Me]

AF Daily - Friday June 26th

Hello, and a late morning to you all!

Dinner at dad's last night was great. We had some really cool discussions and he was more than appreciative of the spaghetti and salad I brought along. I am really liking this vegetarian way of life. Little AFM really enjoyed the spaghetti without meat and I was surprised at how much she ate; or that she ate!

This morning we got up a tad bit later. I had to give Little AFM a bath and then off to daycare. I then went into my dad's again and watered his gardens/houseplants and cleaned up the place. Vacuumed, bathrooms, floors, dishes and the RIPE litter box in the basement. YUCK! I can still smell it.

Well, that is all for me. I am going to do a quick vacuum on my place and clean the bathrooms. Laundry was done yesterday - whoo hoo. I sprayed the oven so I am guessing it means that I HAVE to clean it if I want to use it. LOL.

Still in shock about Michael Jackson. And it is sad that Farrah and Ed are pushed aside.

ps. Yes, the obsessive thoughts are a pain in the arse. If I weren't on Antabuse; I don't know if I would buy a bottle of red tonight or not. I can't seem to shake the thought of having some wine. I know that it will pass; and I sure as heck don't want to drink. When I was cleaning up my dad's place I saw 3 bottle of wine and of course he has lots of beer. I swear I almost drooled at the thought. But we all know that it NEVER turns out to be a good thing. So, ultimately it is not worth it.

Life is good sober. Self-sabotaging is a thing of the past for me. Or at least I am working on it.

Lavande! I am so happy for you!!

Have a great day!

[Cinders]

AF Daily - Friday June 26th

AFM,

I have been thinking long and hard about being around others who drink and not being jealous. (Bottles of red and beer in the house brought this to mind.)

I think the one thing AA says is helpful. Not correct, exactly, but a good way to think about it. We are "allergic" to alcohol.

Other people have peanut allergies, egg allergies, milk allergies and they have the common sense to stay away from foods that contain those things.

We are not technically allergic to alcohol but the results of drinking alcohol are devastating to us physically, mentally and spiritually. So, it is even WORSE than just being physically allergic to something.

Just like my daddy drools to eat shrimp, but is smart enough to stay away from them because he gets deathly ill, we need to look at alcohol the same way.

Add to that the emotional and spiritual damage alcohol does to us, look at AF is freedom, not deprivation, things start coming together.

I am very proud of you for sticking with the Antabuse, btw. I know how difficult that can be. Been there and done that.

You have my admiration.

Love,
Cindi

[Accountable for Me]

AF Daily - Friday June 26th

Thanks Cindi. I totally think that it is freedom being AF. I honestly don't feel deprived. It just came to me like a mac truck this AM. But it passed and it ultimately was from NOT eating. So, I had a sandwich and all is good. I know a lot of the time these cravings come to surface when I am bad and don't eat breakfast.

I sat there last night while dad was having a few beers and it didn't bother me at all. I don't think I could go to a pub though. Not yet.

The antabuse helps me especially when I am bored on a Friday or Saturday night. I like it. It keeps me safe.

You are doing great, Cindi!

[Determinator]

AF Daily - Friday June 26th

AFM, firstly huge congrats on being strong! and a friendly warning from a dietary/nutritional perspective: if you are going veggie, make sure to supplement your protein and fats or some really bad mental things will happen, (mood swings, worse cravings for carbs including al, metabolic slow down etc).

[Accountable for Me]

AF Daily - Friday June 26th

Thanks for the advice, Det. I don't know if I will completely go veggie. I do think we eat too much meat, however. I will ensure that if we do cut it way down that I will supplement the protein and oils. xoxo

The last thing I need are mood swings and bad mental things to happen!!! That is a scary thought! I also would never enforce the kids to go vegetarian. If they want meat, they will get it.