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**Mstall** · July 3, 2009, 07:50 AM

AF Daily - Friday July 3rd

Love that quote!!

Well today after work is going to be tough, but i promise here that I will not drink!

I plan to go grocery shopping and stock up on healthy food. I will go for a long walk when that voice starts up in my head. I will do whatever it takes to remain sober this weekend.

Have a great day everyone!

**Accountable for Me** · July 3, 2009, 08:54 AM

AF Daily - Friday July 3rd

Love the quote, Dill! Thanks!

Not much going on here. It is another beautiful day; and it will be a warm one.

I have a job interview this morning. My current employer is operating below capacity still and I need something regular and fulltime. I am tired of dipping into my savings to cover expenses. One thing that is good about interviewing (when I get them as jobs are so few nowadays) is that I can feel relaxed as I really do have something to fall back on.

Have a great day everyone!

**speedster** · July 3, 2009, 10:55 AM

AF Daily - Friday July 3rd

Dill -- thanks for the great quote!!! I needed that. It’s exactly what I’m struggling with. I had a coworker that use to say things like “I know this is boring, but….” and would proceed with complaints about various personal things. She trapped people in the kitchen, hall, bathroom. I completely avoid her.

Mstall -- sounds like a good plan. I find a short nap sometimes help he transition from work to play on days that I use to transition from work to play with AL.

AFM - the only thing pantyhose is good for is tying up tomato plants. God luck with the interview!

TG - I’m a big Peppers fan. So glad that John Frusciante overcame his heroin addiction and rejoined the group. They’re a brilliant bunch. I need to re-listen to Scar Tissue now. A friend & I were talking about what makes a rock star cool for years. They’re cool when they’re young and living hard and wild. Then they get older and they suddenly look like old guys that need to get their sh%! together and are no longer cool. Then the few that straighten out and pull it together and produce more great music regain their cool status.

Yesterday I asked my friend to step up to president so I can step down. He doesn’t want to do it, and had to say “you’re the best president we’ve ever had”. So that put me in a mental spin. I think I’m doing a mediocre job which mean I either have a poor perception of myself or the past presidents were terrible! LOL

….so I’m feeling guilt about letting people down. I mentioned to hubby but he’s so tired of hearing about it, he didn’t say a word. I asked if he had any comments and he said ’no’. His one-word, honest answer further upset me. BUT! The good news is I worked on being mindful of the turmoil I was feeling and kept my mouth SHUT. A couple hours later I felt normal, and grateful that I just let the turmoil flow and didn’t run for a beer. It would have been a great excuse. I still feel guilty and must work something out that makes me happy. I hate to let people down but as Dill‘s quote says, I want to spend my time wisely.

Headed out to dinner with friends later. A little worried because they’re wine drinkers. I stepped on the scale this morning and still need to take off my winter weight so I plan to turn down the empty AL calories and pick as a light an entr?e as I can find.

**hiddengoal** · July 3, 2009, 11:23 AM

AF Daily - Friday July 3rd

Happy INDEPENDENCE Day AFreedom Riders!
We are FREE!

I hope everyone has an ACTIVE, lovely, AF, hangover free weekend!
That's all...

**Pamina** · July 3, 2009, 02:16 PM

AF Daily - Friday July 3rd

Hi all,

Great quote, Dill. And good for you for hanging in there. I'm struggling a fair bit with how much to engage with other people's troubles. I used to do it an awful lot whereas now I'm almost the opposite in being very hesitant with what I can take on. I may see friends over the weekend that I've avoided for quite a while for just that reason. They're lovely, but their lives feel very chaotic to me, and I'm not sure I want to play agony aunt or life coach. Feeling nervous about that.

Today did not start out well for me. I woke up feeling groggy, as though hungover. I had to pinch myself and think back to last night. I'd had grape juice and mineral water. Phew! I went to a memorial service for a friend who died last summer. It was long and emotional, and for about 5 minutes I absolutely cried my eyes out. I was able to sing the hymns this time, though, unlike at the funeral. Things picked up, met some new people, had interesting chats. and ended up sitting at an outdoor patio as the only person with mineral water surrounded by the proverbial beer drinkers. But I've felt teary on and off all day today, as though she'd died all over again.

A Weightwatchers meeting gave me new food for thought. Contrary to my expectation, 'cause I feel totally bloated, I'd lost loads of weight and am now past the first stone (=14lbs). They gave me multi-coloured stickers and a flat glass marble to symbolise the stone. I've been fiddling with it during the afternoon, which brings me to my question to you all. I realised I have the most impossible time accepting compliments, enjoying success, believing that I can keep it going. I remember MM talking about self-sabotage and was wondering if others here felt a similar tendency to undermine ourselves - unnecessarily!! - and thereby contributing to wobbles in sobriety. If so, how do we take countermeasures??!!

My immediate line of defence was affirmations. The marble reminds me that *I* have done this. It didn't just happen TO me, *I* made it happen. *I* CAN make things happen for me. I CAN stay sober. I CAN lose weight. I CAN do much more than I have been doing in the recent past.

Then I bought a lovely little necklace which they wrapped in pink silk paper. A non-alcoholic pressie. I DO deserve it and I CAN accept presents.

Have a lovely warm AF summer's evening, everybody.

**Doggygirl** · July 3, 2009, 02:28 PM

AF Daily - Friday July 3rd

Dill, thank you for starting us off today and for sharing that quote. That is a good one. AL got a lot of my coin over the years as well. No more. I'm glad you are feeling better today. I guess we need to always know that there will be days like that - difficult days where AL won't shut up. We need to trust that IT WILL PASS and find ways to cope. You CAN have faith that it gets better/easier with more time. Especially if you have accepted that you don't want to drink again (or if you are like me, CAN'T safely drink ever). That way the moderation head game is not in play.

LVT - thank you for the offer of salsa recipes. I have tomatoes starting to turn orange so it won't be too long. I have to pull the yellow onions tomorrow before they explode. What do I do with 'em? (Speedster or any other gardeners feel free to chime in!) Do I have to hang them up to dry or something? How about the garlic? I think that is ready when the tops are yellow and flopped over? If that is not right, how do I know? Shit - be careful what you asked for. I asked for an abundant garden and LOL now I'm panicking. What do you do with the garlic after you pull it up? How do you make dill pickles?

I'm going to have a busy weekend.

Mstall, it sounds like you have a great plan and I like your decisive tone about it. I think that's important.

Speedster I'm guessing that you ARE doing a great job as President. I'm also guessing that everyone else is more than happy with the status quo and you continuing to do it so long as nobody else enthusiastically volunteers. Is this a situation where you might just have to say "As of X date I resign this position..." in order to force the issue? In the end, things generally work out and someone will step up even if they don't really want to - out of sense of obligation or whatever. None of us are indespensible no matter how much people want us to feel that way when they don't want the job.

AFM - hope the job interview went well! Keep us posted. Stand firm on that panty hose issue. :H

HG - cool fireworks! And you too have a wonderful holiday.

TG - thanks for the song recommendation! Gotta love Youtube for anyone else who hasn't heard it yet.... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fvqm4koAHsk[/video]]YouTube - Scar Tissue - Red Hot Chili Peppers

We're officially open for business today but things are of course quiet on the phones and stuff since most businesses (non-retail anyway) are closed today. So I went to AA this morning (my normal Friday AM business meeting was cancelled) and then straight to the gym. Now I am going to go visit my Dad. I'm hoping for a nice quiet and pleasant visit as this will be the last one before he goes back to the hospital for the bypass surgery.

Everyone have a safe and happy and SOBER weekend!!!!

DG

**Determinator** · July 3, 2009, 05:13 PM

AF Daily - Friday July 3rd

Happy 3rd of July ABeroooonies!

Dill, glad you pulled through! hey, if you're ever having a hard time (and this goes for all of you) please PM me and I'll meet you in chat. This is what friends are for afterall!

I'm having a wonderfully lazy day off and may just have to watch that latest Star Trek movie. brew myself an espresso and just 'geek out' for a while

Sober Holidays Rock!!!!!!

be well my friends,

**LVT25** · July 3, 2009, 05:41 PM

AF Daily - Friday July 3rd

DG--I cannot believe how much further ahead your garden is than mine!! WOW!
With your onions, you can step on the tops, once they dry a little go ahead and pull them, take most of the green tops off, and lay them out (on a screen works well) to dry. Then get some panty hose from AFM and put them in there-tie a knot between them, and hang them in a cool dry place to store.
There are tons of pickle recipes online. I've never been very good at pickles-the kids prefer the store bought kind. Mine are never very crisp. The basic recipe is easy--just dill, garlic, water and salt. I can give you more details if you want--let me know and I'll pm or e-mail them to you. Bell and Kerr make great canning books.
Garlic--Det is going to have to run with that one!!:H

hi everybody!!:h

**jessie** · July 3, 2009, 06:53 PM

AF Daily - Friday July 3rd

Hi everyone, am reading the gardening posts and it sounds so relaxing . Might give it a try sometime. I'm on day 4 and feeling groggy, dizzy (is that the same thing) and a little off balance. Yesterday I had the most awful taste in my mouth. When I went AF previously I normally felt quite good by day 3. Is this normal?

**Determinator** · July 3, 2009, 08:42 PM

AF Daily - Friday July 3rd

Jessie, nice to see you here!

yes, when I've been AF and detoxing I've had odd taste in my mouth and many other strange things as well. Just make sure you get water, and some vitamins if possible as well as eating a good variety of food when you feel up to it. This should be ok very soon. If you start feeling worse I'd get in to see the doctor. at this point you should be gradually feeling better and better. Keep up the great work!

**jessie** · July 3, 2009, 08:58 PM

AF Daily - Friday July 3rd

Thanks Det, I'm going shopping now with my bottle of green tea at hand. How weird, when drunk I was never unbalanced ( physically at least, obviously a mental case) but today I will literally have to watch my step. Lol.

**meditation mama** · July 3, 2009, 09:30 PM

AF Daily - Friday July 3rd

Good evening, Abbsters!

I just wanted to check in quick and say I'm here and sober.. yehaw! I will spend some time catching up in the morning. For now, I'm going to read here for a while before I have to go get DD from the movies. Then I'm off to bed - I'm ZZahusted!

See you in the morning..

MM

**dill** · July 4, 2009, 07:33 AM

AF Daily - Friday July 3rd

Good morning, all abbers and Happy Independence Day to you!

AFM, How?d the interview go?

Speedster, if you really want time off from the Presidency, it looks like you are going to have to be assertive about it. Don?t let inertia keep you locked in. Just set an exit date and say you will be glad to take another turn in the position at some later date! Everyone needs to share in the responsibility, not just you! (My 2 cents)

HG, thanks for the fireworks display!

Pamina, I think you summed it up so well!

but their lives feel very chaotic to me, and I'm not sure I want to play agony aunt or life coach. Feeling nervous about that. That?s what it?s like for me, too. I really AM having to put my energies into my own ?project? right now, and I can?t take on much more! It?s too bad I can?t share my struggle with these folks, but they would not understand it, I?m afraid. And besides that, one or two in particular don't just share and be done. They talk their problems into the ground and are just "using" me to sound off to, but endlessly.... I have started just walking away. I'm grateful for summer break!!!

DG, part of the reason I was having such a bad day the other day IS because of the issue you brought up. if you have accepted that you don't want to drink again (or if you are like me, CAN'T safely drink ever).

I am working on that acceptance and the voice in my head (the ?beast?, if you will) was really locking horns with me that day. I know that that surrender is essential. I understand that now.

Deter, thanks so much for the offer to meet in chat any time. That is very kind!

I wish you, and all to come, a wonderful, AF day!

**Becky** · July 4, 2009, 11:19 AM

AF Daily - Friday July 3rd

Hi Dill

I just LOVED your post, well thats me sober for to-day. 5.15 in Britain now.:thanks:

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AF Daily - Friday July 3rd

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