Weekly AA Thread - Week of Aug. 10 - 16

[corkish]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of Aug. 10 - 16

Hi all.
I have tried a bucketload of times to stp this madness myself. I suppose I failed. Now I've researched what I think and it seems that it is too easy to blame a program or product on my failure when I need to address stuff myself. So I went on a few sites.. I read the toolbox thread here and found this thread. I'm only on day 2 but something is different this time. I am going cold turkey abstinent.. I feel weak about it but Im ok. I have enlisted a counsellor, I have joined a gym (and I have been) and I shall also find myself a group in AA. A multipronged approach seems to be a foundation of people who succeed at this so i shall do that too.

I imagine it takes more than not drinking to do this.
On to day 3.
Bye for now.

[retteacher]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of Aug. 10 - 16

I absolutely identified w/the guy on the camping trip that could have drunk out there w/the guys but didn't, because he couldn't live w/himself afterward. Right now, I can't think of ANYTHING more precious than my sobriety. I can't enjoy any facet of my life wo/it.

Some of the meetings can be incredibly emotional like the one you, Deter, went to. Sometimes they are not. I do learn something from every one of them. Also, (& this is key for me), I am getting to know & be recognized by people.

I definitely feel that my "confession" to my husb was a turning point. I guess I was a better actress than I knew, because there was a lot he was hearing for the first time (i.e. hangovers, blackouts, hiding, etc.). It's amazingly freeing to live openly wo/secrets.

Take care one & all. I'm going to my home meeting tonight. We'll be reading & discussing step 2. I really feel I've been restored to sanity. & yes, my HP had a lot to do w/it.

Thank you all for being here. Mary

[retteacher]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of Aug. 10 - 16

Just something quick for the newcomers to this thread & AA meetings.

While it's difficult to share in meetings, especially big ones, please don't hesitate to come here & share what you hear at meetings. It helps you & all of us here that are new to AA & are working to understand how it works. Mary

[retteacher]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of Aug. 10 - 16

Everyone: I just got back from my step 2 meeting. I do feel I've been restored to sanity...at least I'm on the way to becoming sane. When I think about some of the insanity of what I did when drinking, my life now is a bed of rose by comparison. All it took was getting a sponsor I could trust & doing what I was told. Mary

[cpn1004]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of Aug. 10 - 16

Thank you Mary.
Phil

[Determinator]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of Aug. 10 - 16

Mary, good stuff thank you. i agree my life is also so much more manageable now....no comparison!

JM and Corkish, big welcomes! I agree....a multi prong approach is a great idea. that's how I got headed down the path to wellness also.

[Determinator]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of Aug. 10 - 16

hey Phil! nice to see you man

[lucky 2.0]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of Aug. 10 - 16

This is a great thread.

[tylyr]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of Aug. 10 - 16

Just returned, yet again - couldn't decide which thread to get on to. This is indeed an excellent thread. I've tried many, many times. Fell again yesterday, what surprised me was that I totally gave in to the craving, didn't even try to ride it. I knew the remorse would be there, but for some reason it just didn't register. Like so many, I need to do this. I'm not a massive, huge drinker, but it's too much by far. Hope to have some support again. Mary, you are excellent, as so many of you are. One day I hope I'll be able to say that I have weeks, months under my belt. So far the most I've done is 10 weeks, and then gave in

[Doggygirl]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of Aug. 10 - 16

Huge welcome to the new posters to this thread. I completely agree with the multiple pronged approach. Do whatever it takes! For me, I've settled into a sobriety program that includes the MWO forum, a modification to the supplement regime recommended here, the exercise and diet recommendations found here, and AA. I have also used several of the tools that can be found at SMART Recovery (SMART Recovery? Help with Alcohol, Drug, and Other Addictions) and that is the program where I first found the value of face to face support. The problem is that there just aren't nearly the numbers of people or meetings involved.

I have resisted all things religious and also spiritual like a wild cat for most of my adult life. I am finding the spiritual journey that is part of AA to be interesting and beneficial, and I'm also finding that it's really NOT a religious program. While the Christian faith dominates - that's a reflection of the population in my area - there ARE people of other faiths who regularly participate in the meetings I attend. One of the most interesting is a man who is a Native American and he practices what his forefathers did. And then there is the Good Old Drunks around the table that my own coach talks about. He raises a good point - when he came to AA he was worshiping AL and he needed to find something else to worship before it killed him. I can relate to that because that is exactly where I was at the end of my own drinking career. Worshiping AL until death do us part.

Anyway....I had a lot of misperceptions about AA before I went. Yes, these people are enthusiastic in their sobriety which at first can seem odd. But I want what they have! What they have is far better than anything I had while drinking.

I love the story of the man off camping with his pals. I could feel that situation in my bones - the "nobody would know..." line of thinking that would surely dominate my thinking. The problem for me is that there is NO such thing as a night or weekend of drinking, then "back to normal." The last time I drank after an AF stretch led to 8 months of drinking. But my brain would sure like to get me to go there.

Deter the story of the man who did end up in rehab brought a tear to my eye too. Thank you for sharing that. AL is powerful - no doubt about that. It is great to know that recovery can be powerful sometimes too.

I am reviewing my 4th step work and just digging deeper where I can. I have so many years of drinking history that I will probably continue to remember things for many years to come. That is keeping me busy as a wait to do Step 5.

Have a great day all!

DG

[corkish]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of Aug. 10 - 16

For some reason even though I have looked up an AA group I feel thousands of reasons in my head why not to go. This probaly means even more that I SHOULD go. I ended up not going last night cos I said to myslef that if I could do it this way i was succeeding.. I mean who I am fooling. I've done 3 days before and I knwo i need to make this different by DOING this differently. I need to surround myself with people doing this properly not fooling around at it like i have done fo rthe past 100 years. I need to sabotage my saboteur... somehow.

My energy levels are pretty low. I find it har d at the gym but I figure if i take it slow and gentle it will work out.

onwards I go.
C

[Doggygirl]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of Aug. 10 - 16

corkish, for me I resisted fully admitting to my alcohol addiction for years and years. And that's part of what kept me away from AA. It is well known that AA is a program of permanent abstinence and my brain surely did NOT want to go there, even though I knew better. So I can absoultely relate to what you are going through I think.

I encourage you to just go even though it's a tough mental game at first. There is so much relief in getting some freedom from the obsession to drink.

DG

[retteacher]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of Aug. 10 - 16

corkish: If you can keep attending meetings that would be a simple approach to starting the program. You don't have to talk or admit to being an alcoholic. Just listen to people talk & share.

Interesting meeting last night on the BB. It's the 3rd time I'm reading the same chapter about first identifying myself as an AL. Is my HP telling me something?

Mary

[Doggygirl]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of Aug. 10 - 16

Mary it's funny how that works with repetitive lessons when we somehow need them. (whether we realize we need them or not at the time!!)

Just got home from Saturday Big Book study meeting. We are reading the "A Vision For You" Chapter which I love - I have practically everything highlighted it all hits home so much. It continues to amaze me how alcoholism in 1935 played out just like alcoholism does in 2009. The decor in the bars might change (well, I think some bars might still have the 1935 decor :H) but AL never changes at all. The downward spiral for an alcoholic back then was just like it is today.

Bill W and Dr. Bob sure knew the thinking and behavior of alkies inside and out. If anyone wonders whether the AA program is based on anything of relevance today, I recommend reading the big book. Not necessarily the program of recovery part - just the parts about alcoholism to see if you think the founders understood what goes on in our heads and lives. To me, it's uncanny. That is what makes me willing to try the things that are part of the program whether I am full on board with those things logically or not. My own logic cannot be relied on when it comes to AL anyway.

My reading assignment this weekend from the coach is the story "Empty on the Inisde." Just from the title I can already tell I will relate to some if not all of it.

Have a great day all!

DG

[cpn1004]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of Aug. 10 - 16

Greetings all,
Made it back to the BB study today. Not yet on solid ground, but AF today.
Love and Peace,
Phil