Relapse Prevention methods

[Kimberley]

Hi all,

I really need to concentrate on preventing lapses as they have happened far too often of late and I want to be sober for the rest of my life.

I think I have not been accessing enough support with the addicition and need to put more plans in place. I do not go to AA and don't want to, although I know they can teach you skills.

What have been your most successful relapse prevention methods? Taken from anywhere - counselling, groups or just hard-learned lessons. My problem is drinking at home.

Please share as I really need some advice. Thanks.

[spedteach]

Relapse Prevention methods

Kimberly,
Just posted on the 7.5 days thread but have been thinking a lot about relapse prevention.
I have gone to 12 step meetings on and off for years and recently gave myself permission to quit beating my head against the wall and just admit to myself that the 12 steps didn't work for me.
I can't fake it til I make it any more!
Am in therapy and my therapist suggested that I start meditating. I am not the calmest person in the world but am giving it a try. Am exercising a lot and kind of combining meditation with exercise. Swimming is great for this cause there's nothing else to do except focus on your breathing when you're swimming.
Also found a book called Mindful Recovery, by Thomas Bien. It's about different practices you can do in recovery like meditating, journaling, being outside. Talks a lot about relapse prevention too.
Good luck. Will be reading this thread; I'm overhauling my tool box. Any advice from any one would be welcome.
spedteach

[Doggygirl]

Relapse Prevention methods

One of the main reasons I went to AA after being sober for almost 9 months was to explore a way to get over a nagging irrational (seemed that way to me) fear of relapse. So I'm not sure I'm much help to your question since AA is not what you are looking for.

Have you explored the tools at smartrecovery.com? I haven't been to the site in awhile but last time I was there, there were quite a number of fairly long term sober people actively posting there who specifically use the SMART program. And that program is most definitely NOT AA. Might be an interesting place to start looking around.

For me I think finding peace of mind is one important component. I think there are a variety of ways to achieve that. I also have to really watch my self centeredness / pity party mode. My thinking gets all whacky if I allow myself to drift into self absorption.

Just a couple of ideas...I can certainly relate to the challenge you feel.

DG

[Boss.man]

Relapse Prevention methods

I think this was intended to be the link: SmartRecovery.org

SMART Recovery? Help with Alcohol, Drug, and Other Addictions

[boozehag]

Relapse Prevention methods

If your main problem is drinking at home then the first step would be to train yourself never ever to buy drink or to have it in the house for any reason then you cannot drink it. Once you buy it or have it in the house then you know are asking for trouble. If you know that you could be tempted to buy AL at a particular time of the day for example then make sure you leave your credit cards/cash etc at home so there is no option. Also take the l-glut any time you feel a craving coming on. Those two small steps helped me immensely in the beginning and it did not take very long at all to get used to just not stopping off to buy AL - a couple of weeks maybe. Also I ate a lot of cake. Good luck!
M

[Doggygirl]

Relapse Prevention methods

Bossman - thank you for the link correction!

Kimberly, I can really relate as I was an at home drinker too - that was my self imposed prison in the end. So I'm really trying to think back through my own journey and suggest what I can that might help. I surely agree with BH that having booze in the house for any reason has to be "out." My brain is a scary place and I have to really watch myself for things like "well, I need to have this wine here for company...." and trickery such as that.

SMARTRecovery has some on-line meetings where they also incorporate PalTalk which is kind of neat. They also have face to face groups but they are few and far between - maybe you would get lucky there.

I have changed my entire life style. (Well, since sitting on my ass 24X7 with a drink in my hand WAS my life style, something HAD to give LOL!) I lead a much much much more ACTION oriented life now. Exercise has been an important component - I feel less like doing unhealthy things (I am also an ex-smoker) after a really hard workout than if I'm lounging around. It seems like I've gradually added things to "life" so now I hardly sit still. It beats drinking.

Anyway, trying to pony up a few ideas for you. Best wishes. It's worth doing whatever it takes to get the monkey off our backs.

DG

[lilmea]

Relapse Prevention methods

Kimberley,

I agree with what everyone else has said here. I was an at home, day drinker. I don't keep AL in the house, ever. Exercise is also a huge part of my program. But I've also had to reevaluate my friendships. I had one friend (a total nondrinker) who has a very negative attitude. For her, life is just all doom and gloom. I have had to really distance myself from her. The choices we have to make are not always easy. Good luck.

[dancelot]

Relapse Prevention methods

Hi, Kimberly-

I was definitely more of an at home drinker. Late at night usually, when I tend to get kind of hyper anyway. I've always liked working second shift, and am self employed so my hours don't have to be in the daytime. So one thing is knowing when you want a drink most. Also, no liquor in the house. I've used the excuse of "not wanting to waste it" if it's around. I also starting buying big bottles of flavored sparkling water and get my evening cocktail(s) out of this. I finish 'em off too once I get going and have this creeping fear of running out, same as with wine or beer! I don't know what that says, but it is AL free, so I won't worry about it. I wonder if in my case a lot of it just a wierd habit, that for whatever reason I like drinking liquids when I'm stressed or hyper. I also find if I feel that urge to drink coming on, to come to this site, just read various postings, you will always find one that reminds you why you don't want to be that way anymore, as well as the positive support. In fact, the first day I found this place I stayed on chat a long time and at some point someone who was obviously in crisis came on and I asked myself, do I really want to be like that ever again? Anyway, I hope that person is ok, but seeing what one's own worst side looks like is a tremendous deterrent to me. I'll be 21 days AF at the end of today, and need to always remember my own advice as well as all the wonderful suggestions others post. This really is such a great place.

Much Love!!!!