AF daily Wed 09/09/09 !!!

[SAUSAGE]

:welcome:

Hello there - where is everyone!?!?
I'm at the start of Day 4 (day 4 is quite tough I recall) but hanging on in there!!

Interesting point raised late last night on yesterdays thread about the importance of that first drink when you come in from work (or in my case once i've got the kids into bed) - how that sets the tone for the evening - and that relaxation effect often sets in even before any alcohol can kick in ie after a sip or too, and so can be obtained just as easily from an AF drink ie a cup of tea or a ginger beer - what do others feel about this?

I'll be back later

Sasuage xx

[Mstall]

AF daily Wed 09/09/09 !!!

Morning Sausage! and all that follow

I use that time when i first get home from work to take the dog and myself for a walk, that is my replacement for wine. during the night i usually just stick to water, occassionally some tea.

will be interested to hear others thoughts on that.

another day AF! have a great sober one all!

[speedster]

AF daily Wed 09/09/09 !!!

Morning Sausage and Mstall!

Sausage good for you to be at Day 4, you'll do fine today.

Usually about an hour before the work day ends or on the drive home, I might have thoughts of AL. But like Mstall, I go home and play with Pupster and then go for a bike ride or take care of a chore. It seems to take 30-60 minutes for the thoughts to pass and once passed they don't resurface that evening. If I came home and immediately started cooking, I'd probably see if there was beer in the house. But if I do something outside the kitchen for the 1st hour home, I do fine. Seltzer water with lime is what I drink when I do enter the kitchen.

Have a great day!

[greeneyes]

AF daily Wed 09/09/09 !!!

Morning abbers!

Good luck with day 4 sausage!

Hi to mstall, speedster & all to come!

I agree with sausage. I think everyone probably had some sort of ritual for after work. Sit down with a glass of X and go through the mail or catch the news. The ritual can be the same I think just replace X with something enjoyable but AF. I think the relaxation aspect of it can be the same. Or if the ritual is too much of a reminder, switch it out for a new one like mstall did.

Not much happened work wise yesterday. EO was so stabby I got sent home twice. :H

Ta ta!

[Lavande]

AF daily Wed 09/09/09 !!!

Morning Abbers,

I've replaced all my wine glasses with coffee/tea mugs! Simple as that!! Decaf or herbal tea after dinner until bedtime so I'm able to sleep

Planning a paperwork catch-up day today - boring but necessary. Procrastination comes very naturally to me, ha ha. I have to work on that - one of these days

Have a great AF Wednesday everyone!
Lav

[Cinders]

AF daily Wed 09/09/09 !!!

Good morning Abbers,

Since I was a 24/7 drinker, I had to pretty much replace every habit I had.

However, my worst "stab" of wistfulness always happens when we go to a nice restaurant. Even though I usually drink tea, diet coke, coffee, etc, at home, when I go out I get a club soda with cranberry. It seems special and I don't feel deprived.

I do get frustrated with the feeling of deprivation when it strikes. I remember the tool box post about being grateful we are free rather than feeling deprived. Nonetheless, once in a while it hits.

But, luckily I recognize and have acquiesced to the reality that I am not ever going to be able to moderate. One drink with hubby at a restaurant would just ignite all those old desires again and I would have to tamp them down, down, down.

So not worth it!!

Hope all have a successful day!! Hang in there, Sausage. The difficult days will soon be just a memory.

Love,
Cindi

[Sarasmiles]

AF daily Wed 09/09/09 !!!

Morning, Everyone,

I'm just jumping in here...I know some of you, but I've mostly hung out with the Mod Squad. I've been having a very tough time with modding and am starting a 30 day AF stretch, to clear my head, improve my moods, and get some inner strength back.

I'm on day three, and this morning I really appreciated the joys of not drinking! Since I was AF last night, I slept well (I did take Tryptophan and Valerian to make sure) and woke up at 5:30, feeling rested. That meant I had plenty of time to pack the kids' snacks and lunches, make them pancakes and sausage for breakfast, and even baked a batch of chocolate chip cookies for when they get home today! It's their first day back at school, and I feel so good. They were all showered and dressed in plenty of time for us to ride bikes to school and there was none of that awful crabbiness I feel when I'm even a little hungover, pressed for time because it was hard to get up...

One of the things that's made it so hard for me to just quit this stupid drinking habit, is that so much of the time I'm "not that bad". I function. Only once in a while have I had enough to drink to lose my balance or have a black out. (I know, some would say, "once in a while is "that bad".) But more often than not, I've kept it under some semblance of control. What I realize when I'm AF is that even when I drink 2 or 3 glasses of wine, it has a very negative effect on me. Not only does it put me at risk for getting into "vampire drinking" mode, when I want more, more, more...But it also screws up my moods, my sleep, my eating... AF is just better. Period.

As for that end of the day drink...I find that time hard, too. I agree that a substitute drink can help. I sometimes take an L-Glut, or Kudzu or Gaba Calm at that time. I'm not sure how much it really does on the spot like that, but at the very least it has a placebo effect, and makes me feel I'm doing something to help myself. I have three young kids, and even though their behavior (fighting, whining, etc.) can be a trigger, their affection can be a comfort and a reminder, too, of why I shouldn't drink. I like to ask one of them to cuddle on the couch and read with me at around 5, when I have so often allowed myself to pour that first glass of wine. I can't deal very well with the stress of all three of them together at that hour, but for now I'm going to let 2 watch TV for a bit, so I can have one on one time with each of them. I put tons of pressure on myself to be an attentive, involved mom...I have often made them turn off the TV and do stuff, just because it seems like the "right" thing. But just for this month, I'm going to try and make my sobriety a priority. I know that ultimately they'll benefit from that more than anything.

Off to work. Have a happy, healthy, alcohol free day, everyone! I look forward to checking in with you tonight.
Sara

[universal]

AF daily Wed 09/09/09 !!!

Hi everyone,

I agree, the after work drink is the one that is the most difficult as it ends up starting an entire trend for the night. And it is so true that even after one or two sips (before the AL has even had a chance to kick in) you seem to have that aaaaaaahhhhhhh relaxation effect. It's all in our minds obviously!

I have to go grocery shopping after work tonight and I'm going to buy some soda water and fresh lemons and limes so that tonight when I get home my first drink will be that. BF is working tonight and my daughter is at her dads which is usually a big trigger for me. However tonight I will begin with that soda and lime and do some housework, have a hot bath and get my butt into bed without any AL in the system.

Have a healthy day everyone! Can't wait to put an 0 in my tracker tomorrow.

Love and hugs,
Uni

[peacenik]

AF daily Wed 09/09/09 !!!

best to sausage and sarah...children are good motivators and terrific triggers!
i have been struggling with massive cravings the past two days...horrible constant thoughts of "just one bottle of wine"...UUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!! i have been taking l-glutes, kudzu and just really trying to get over the humps, but the humps keep getting bigger!
talk about drinking when you get home from work made me think about what i do during my "witching hours".i find dog walks or workouts to be great substitutes because i take loooong walks that keep me out of harms way and workouts take up alot of time because i have to shower after and then make dinner, so it takes my mind off cravings for quite some time. usually after about 7 or 8 pm, i'm fine.

i am at home all day, so the potential for giving in is great at times..sometimes i think only embarrassment keeps me out of the liquor store before 2 pm!

anyway, onwards and upwards...

don, i hope you are ok and doing allright.

peace!

[peacenik]

AF daily Wed 09/09/09 !!!

i just wanted to mention a book i just finished called "lies my mother never told me". it's a memoir by a woman named kaylie jones who is the daughter of james jones who wrote "from here to eternity" and "the thin red line" amongst others. both of her parents were major alcoholics, but the word "alcoholic" was demonized in their home. the book is a good reminder of why it is important to get sober and to make ammends with family and friends that were hurt by our drinking. i highly reccommend it.

[Chief]

AF daily Wed 09/09/09 !!!

Hi All,

Day 1 here.....time to do this.

Don

[retteacher]

AF daily Wed 09/09/09 !!!

Don: So glad to see you back. Please keep posting regardless of what is going on. Also, we'd love to see you on the AA thread. You don't have to be going to meetings to join in. Mary

[Lynnie]

AF daily Wed 09/09/09 !!!

Day 1 here too! I did 10 AF days last week though! I have problems with headaches once I start to go AF though......hate it!

[Determinator]

AF daily Wed 09/09/09 !!!

Happy Wed ABeroooooos!!!

this is a wonderful day for me...my sweet Dx is coming home after 2 incredibly long weeks at burning man. weeeeeeeeee!!!! can't wait!

Don, Lynnie so glad you are here. visualize the goal and don't let it go. be completely obstinate! that's how we were with our bad habits and that's how we must be with our good ones.

Peacenick, sorry you have been having cravings. walking is great and you may want to add some vigorous exercise too just to get that endorphin rush going. it really helps bonk my mind into a health place.

Cindi, your post really resonated with me. very closely. I spent a lot of time miring over 'I can't play with the other kids' kind of thoughts. I've come to realize that's my tricky mind trying to be selfish and mess with me. We are not falling for it!.

ok, busy busy day. zoom zoom

be well

[Sarasmiles]

AF daily Wed 09/09/09 !!!

It's 5:35 and I'm on day 3, having a craving. I've been playing with the kids since they got home from school, and I hate to admit it, but I'm a little bored and restless. Those feelings often lead me to pour that first glass of wine...Just to change my mood, kind of keep me entertained. Instead, I'm here to say hello. I just emptied an L-Glut. capsule under my tongue, took a kudzu, and am sipping grapefruit flavored seltzer. I will be so glad tomorrow if I don't drink tonight!!!