af daily sun 13 sept

[bear73]

Good morning all - it's day 29 sf and af here for me.

I was open with good friends last eve about why I was really not drinking - they were really really supportive and we had a chat and they gave me a bg hug. It felt so good!

I am now being open with my proper close friends, and with my not so close friends I am just saying it's the stopping smoking thing,

A mixed week on holiday very small boat and 1 friend was almost having tantrums each day if things didn't go exactly as she planned. It was very hard feeling really criticised in very small environment - with no alcohol or cigs. She was visibly angry that I had stopped drinking in supermarket on way ' well I want to get some beer, I hadn't planned a sober holiday'. I replied that she should get beer if she wanted beer.

She's a v old friend and our other joint old friend and her partner were there too - she was constantly trying to set up situations with 'joking' criticism of me, backfired on her - I didn't end up being isolated.
It would have been very hard to openly challenge in such a small area as didn't want to 'rock the boat' too much - no pun intended!

She competes with me, and puts me down (subtly) and i think becasue i am calmly standing up or myself that rankled her as the balance of our friendship has shifted.

Anyway looking at calm beautiful scenery, sorts my head out I kept constantly saying in my head 'it's her stuff' got me through - and chocolate! I feel quite tearful now though - sad the friendship may be waning after a long time,frustrated that I was scared to confront in case whole group rejected me.

I get inspired looking at beautiful scenery so my plans are
spend more time in my day to day life in outdoors
sign up for a creative eve course
join running club
eat more fruit and veg
challenge this friend openly in future

thansk to al lwho responded re my eating query.
Determinator - I probably have 500 cals a day of choc - trying to aim for 1600 total intake of cals per day and limit 'treat' food to 200-300 cals a day.

good day all - lot going on for me - but pleased that I was brave and faced it and didn't lapse.

[SAUSAGE]

af daily sun 13 sept

Morning everyone

Beautiful warm sunny day today - makes up for the wet summer we've had. Makes me in a very positive frame of mind. Have already been swimming at 7.30am (approx 30 x 25m)- taking my son to a birthday party later. Yesterdays trip to London with the kids went well too.

I'll be back later - hello to all

Sausage

[Marshy]

af daily sun 13 sept

Hello all,

I had a nice this morning after a busy week at work. I have no idea how I managed to cope at work when I was drinking. I always *thought* I was functioning perfectly well. I now suspect I was nowhere near as functioning as I thought I was!

Bear - I went on a barge holiday with friends once. Never again! Everyone was too close for comfort. I do think that when we get sober we suddenly start to notice all sorts of things we didn't when we were drinking, including other people's behaviour towards us. It's a tricky thing to deal with.

Sausage - I'm off for a swim too. Couldn't face it at 7.30 though!

[Doggygirl]

af daily sun 13 sept

Good morning all! It's nice to follow the sun so to speak and follow the UK posters! Bear I am really proud of you for not only staying AF/SF under challenging circumstances but also for the introspection you are putting into your sobriety. I do think we hide a lot of garbage underneath our addictions and examining that stuff - especially our relationships with other people - is not always easy. Kudos to you for bravely doing that, and for not being a doormat about it either.

Sausage I'm pea green that you are already done with your workout for the day! Sounds like it's a nice day weather wise and I hope you enjoy it!

Marshy I love your ASC (Alternative Smilie Collection). You are probably done working out by now too so I'm double pea green.

Time sure flies when I get on MWO! I gotta run to AA then to the gym to do the workout I skipped yesterday. :upset: Now I regret switching days off! Oh well. It will feel good once I get there and get rolling. Not much else officially planned for the day so maybe I will do some closet cleaning or maybe I will just goof off. Or maybe google about dealing with my pumpkins sans chain saw. One thing is for sure - there will be no AL in my day and I'm dang happy about that.

DG

[Lavande]

af daily sun 13 sept

Good morning Abbers,

Happy Sunday. Waiting for some sunshine - rumor is that we should see some sunshine later on

bear, congrats on your 29 days, awesome! Tackling both quits at once is daunting and you're doing so well. I too have become aware of other people's behaviors & habits since going AF. It really is an eye opener. I've sent Mr Lav running with his tail between his legs quite a few times now. He has a tendency to be quite rude with people, sometimes it's embarrassing for me. Nowadays he's thinking twice before opening his mouth because he knows I'm not ignoring his comments and I'm going to respond..........grrr!

Hi Sausage, good to see you doing so well again

Marshy, I have to agree, I don't think I was functioning as well as I thought before going AF. I'll never put myself back into that miserable mode! What a waste of time that was.........

DG, I harvested my huge crop of birdhouse gourds yesterday. I cleanned off the mud & debris, now have them sitting on a couple of shelves in the garage to dry. It takes up to 6 months but once dried they can be painted or decorated any way you like. I'm going to give most of them to my daughter & daughter-in-law, they are quite talented. I have had several gourds hanging outside this year, the little birds love them & have nested in them

Wishing everyone a wonderful AF Sunday!
Lav

[paula]

af daily sun 13 sept

Good afternoon everyone. Well done bear, at times we really need to know who our real friends are, looks like you are getting to know yours. Hope all achieve set goals ODAT.

[Doggygirl]

af daily sun 13 sept

Hi Paula! Good to see you pop in here to Daily AF!

Lav, I just wanted to say that now I am very intrigued by gourds (sp) and birdy potential. I need to read up about that for next years garden. Learning how to paint them might be a good winter activity too. (although me with paint is a frightening thought!!) Your gourds sound cool!

DG

[Sonny22]

af daily sun 13 sept

Hi All,

After such an enthusiastic start to my AF alas it didn't last and I only lasted four days..... Thought I'd give it another go on AF Daily so that I can take each day one at a time rather than look at the whole lifetime think. At least that way I hope to be able to put things in place as I go along.

It is good to have such good online support. I have not drank today but I am ashamed to say that I took myself to bed this afternoon in a very depressed state and left a note in the kitchen saying 'there will be no dinner today'. I have never done this before..... but i am so tired.... I wld love to be happy and joyfull again and it is a real inspiration to hear the positive comments in this thread.

onwards and upwards

[Determinator]

af daily sun 13 sept

Happy Sunday ABers far and wide!

Bear73, what a nice and heartfelt start to our day. lots of things come to mind but you staying AF is the most noteworthy

I can't believe we slept in 'til almost 10am today! holy mother of garlic!

better go do some things. zoom zoom

be well friends

[Determinator]

af daily sun 13 sept

Sonny, so sorry your having a rough patch, but the main thing is to not give up. the beginning of this journey is certainly the hardest part. taking some 'you' time isn't selfish so try not to beat yourself up too much. you MUST be selfish for recovery to work. it's all about YOU after all. you'll feel better soon. eat, hydrate, rest and stick with us.

[Doggygirl]

af daily sun 13 sept

Hi Deter! Wow that sleep in sure sounds nice. Have fun zoom zooming.

Hello Sonny. Determinator is right - THE most important thing is DO NOT GIVE UP. The early part is the hardest part. Please know in your heart, to keep you motivated, that there *IS* a LOT of joy in living that may not seem obvious at first. For me every bit of misery getting sober at first has been worth it for the benefits down the road. I was so miserable drinking at the end - there wasn't even much of a pretense of "happy" even in a tipsy state. Now I am getting some "happy" deep down, and you can too.

So...take a nap. Do WHATEVER you have to do in order to stay sober just for today. Yesterday is gone. Who knows what tomorrow will bring. Be sober now and the rest will take care of itself. Welcome to AF Daily!!

DG

PS - The single serving honeydew's / cantalopes / watermelons are hysterical. Tasty but funny. And low carb. Even the water melon. How many carbs can 2 bites of water melon possibly have, anyway?? I should grow them next year and sell them as "Atkins Watermelons."

[Marshy]

af daily sun 13 sept

Lavande;714459 wrote:
Marshy, I have to agree, I don't think I was functioning as well as I thought before going AF. I'll never put myself back into that miserable mode! What a waste of time that was.........

Yes, what a ridiculous waste of time! What were we thinking? :H

DG - genius about the Atkins watermelons! Or "lunch melon"?

Sonny22 - I love your note about dinner! I'm sure "they" can cook their own dinner - and make something for you while they're at it. As Det & DG have said, do what YOU need to do. I used to take lots of hot baths in the early days - two or three an evening - because it helped me relax. Cleanest alkie in London

[LVT25]

af daily sun 13 sept

Hello my af friends!

I want/need to respond to all of the posts, but unless I take notes, I can't remember who said what!:upset: I've got to start exercising my brain as well as my body.

Sonny-nothing wrong with taking a break from life. It is hard for us moms especially that think we need to do it all! I know I used to go, go, go with beer and ciggies for fuel, but the next day I was worthless. Now, I quit when I'm tired, and I don't cook if I don't feel like it. I remember too well the hangovers were emotionally as well as physically painful. Stick with us, we'll give you the support and advice you need.

Lavande--I am still trying to learn when to stand up for myself and when to keep my mouth shut. I'm kinda like Bear--still keeping it shut around some, but mostly say what I feel to my hubby also! And, my sis gave me a guord that she painted white, cut a big mouth and some eyes and put candy in it for Halloween--it's a ghost!

Ok, drumroll all you gardeners out there......I have a greenhouse!!! Well, I have a greenhouse frame. Hubby and the boys helped disassemble it at haul it home this weekend! It was a lot of work, but it was free!!! I may put it over my tomato plants to prolong the harvest this year, but we won't set it up until next year. Eventually, I might try to start plants and sell them--I'm so excited!!

Now, that reminds me, it has been over a week since the garden has been picked!:upset: Where does the time go??? I still have a bag of beans in the fridge I haven't even had time to cook. I REALLY shouldn't have planted so much stuff this year--what was I thinking???

Well, I guess I better get busy!

[peacenik]

af daily sun 13 sept

hello all...many struggles gong on around these parts lately. it's good to have you consistently sober folks to remind us that we can do it, and how to do it.

i'm not sure what threw me over the edge, but i sure went over it. i'm back and day 2 started well with a long dog walk and a visit to a local festival where i picked up a beautiful little oil painting done by a friend of mine.

2 days off track makes me worry about winter...i might try some anti depressants to see if that is where my trouble lies...i know i get depressed, i mean i want to see if anti depressants work or me as i have never tried them before. i'm not really into taking meds for depression (unless its wine...IM KIDDING), i feel like its natural part of the life cycle, but in the winter i get SOOOOOOO down, i think i might need to try and see if that helps me stay out of the bottom of the bucket.

peace all!!!

:thanks::h:l

[Determinator]

af daily sun 13 sept

want an Atkins Watermelon!! hahahahahaha that's too cute. we could take them bowling. Bacci?

Peacenick, I've received a lot of benefit form my SRI 'citalopram' anti dep. A pleasant surprise that it costs me about $2.50 per month without insurance. no kidding!