V as in Victory!

[1967]

Heya!
So it's 8:10 PM and I consider today over, and I didn't drink!
Whoopie!!!
It was close though... I was too tired for the gym = bad I know.
Then I thought 'I need a refill of Stablon". The first pharmacy was out so I had to go to town. I was STARVING when I left school = bad news.
There was long line at the pharmacy so I took off on foot to find a snack.
I went to KFC first, they used to see tacos there? Now they don't. I couldn't eat their choices so I continued my search. Places were either closed or they had a bar.
Yah, see?? I did okay!
I should have stopped at the supermarket but they have a fantastic wine section.
So I am through day 2 (feels a bit like day 45), but I know it will get easier.
Part of my motivation was that I was so tired and cranky this morning!

Hope everyone is doing okay too!

[1967]

V as in Victory!

oh and i think reading the threads helped in the day too. so i subscribe to a few more now.
am very tired and still a little ill.

[Lavande]

V as in Victory!

Stick with us 1967, you won't be sorry

Lav

[startingover]

V as in Victory!

Good going 1967!
For me, reading about other peoples experiences gave me inspiration to carry on when things got tough. Being cranky is par for the course at times. Just know that it will pass
You can do this!!

[1967]

V as in Victory!

Good morning all... i also got new earplugs and slept MUCH better last night!
this morning i feel about 3% better than yesterday.
i don't feel at all confident about staying clear of wine.
yesterday i kept having this internal conversation in my mind about 'not drinking!'

one reason i think i started again was because i was starting to feel tired and cranky again.
my job is nutty.
i was feeling that 'oh so good' cause I wasn't drinking.
Not drinking isn't enough to make a human perfectly content, I guess I see this now.
I'm going to have to never let down my guard on the alcohol problem.

so... todays plan is leave work at 4 and go to the gym. hopefully i won't have a meeting.
and i need something besides cereal for lunch (and breakfast).
i also need to come to terms w/the fact that i am single and single people eat lots of meals alone.
i've only been alone since 1994 so i really don't understand why i can't seem to understand this?
i must eat.
i must eat!

good luck all...

[1967]

V as in Victory!

whoops... i do have a staff meeting at 3:30. So I might get to the gym by 4:30.
I am going to say that 30 minutes at the gym will have to be good enough.
and I DEFINITELY need to have a proper lunch.
maybe i'll go to the market for tuna sandwich? there is nothing close to school for lunches... or dinner. no canteen.
yesterday morning the water machine was out.
one really has to be prepared.

[hippie37]

V as in Victory!

I have to say 1967 even though your only 3% better than yesterday (LMAO!) from your posts here you sound in very good spirit. I can almost imagine you with a spring in your step! (dare I say!)

Have a great day. You're sounding really positive!

Love and Light
Phil
xx

[Doggygirl]

V as in Victory!

:yougo: 1967!! I used to not believe it, but have really come to believe this truly is a one day (or even one moment) at a time journey. You did GREAT fighting off the urges and the "stinkin' thinkin'" Always remember that alcohol will NOT solve your problems - it will only make them worse. Cranky? AL does not address whatever is making you cranky. And imagine how much MORE cranky you will be if you still have whatever is making you cranky AND a hangover. And probably some guilt to go with it.

Sober is better. It's not always easy. It's not always fun. But it IS always better.

ROCK ON!!! Day 2. EAT EAT EAT!!

DG

[dancelot]

V as in Victory!

1967 -

Remember that saying "HALT" - stands for Hungry, Angry, Lonely, or Tired. When you feel the urge to drink, see if it's one of these. "Hungry" sounds like it might be a big one (when I think about when I used to want to drink, that would be it 80% of the time).

You might want to make your own lunch, and keep a supply of healthy snacks (sorry cereal doesn't count). Just make sure you have dinner before the grocery store, it'll help stay rational about the wine section. Or go early in the morning on your day off after you've eaten breakfast. Buying wine at 7 am has a nasty feel, so it's easier to bypass at that hour.

Really getting on a balanced diet is so important, it does effect our moods a lot more than we think. Eating enough protein and fatty fish (or fish oil) is helpful for most mood disorders. Maybe there's some good ol' fatty fish down where you are!

Anyway, I'll get off my mommy soapbox now. You're sounding better, and hope it just keeps getting better! Take care! :h

[1967]

V as in Victory!

Heya all!
Well... guess what? It's 7:42 PM and I am as sober as a lamb!
Again, it wasn't easy. I forced myself to go to the gym after our long and boring staff meeting. I was practically slurring from boredom.
After the gym I was happy to come home. Imagine that!
I was rather amazed. I thought of putting on my nightie and reading! And it didn't seem like a horrible fate.

Thanks for the posts today! Nice to hear from you Phil, your post made me giggle!
Dancelot, I cannot make lunch. It is not part of my DNA. I've tried. I fail. Either it ends up in the bottom of my bag, or it looks so disgusting by lunch time I won't eat it anyway. But agreed, I need to find a better solution. Kashi Go Lean cereal counts as a meal, no? Why not? And Raisin Bran? Come on, it requires the same amount of effort as feeding cats! It can't be all bad.
Salmon is my favorite of course, but the sight of salmon left overs give me the chills.
And I'm sick of Lean Cuisine and they are too expensive here. A complete waste of money.
I had Ramen noodles today, yum yum! And an apple before the stimulating staff meeting.
Any ideas for lightning fast lunches are welcome!

Yes, eating is a problem. Especially now that my favorite sushi joint is off limits.
I am feeling a bit more chipper and looking forward to sleep! Tomorrow is day four.
Whomever reminded me to stay away from my usual haunts, thanks. It seems obvious but I need reminding. I live a life very much inside myself here so there are few people who even know how I struggle with this wine problem. I don't know that there is anyone on the island that knows how I feel I am cheating myself of a comfortable future with drink. It makes me want to talk to people, but I forget what I said ultimately so what was the point??

Good night all!

[Doggygirl]

V as in Victory!

:yougo:1967!!!:yougo:

Another sober day is awesome. Sounds like working out after work ended up being a good thing. I often feel like that - don't really want to when I have to drag myself to the gym. But it never fails - I always feel good when the workout is done. Sounds like that helped you relax and set up for a nice peaceful evening!

Think Positive again today! You can do it.

DG

[1967]

V as in Victory!

home safe and sound and already spoke to the IRS help line.
((which i messed up most likely because i was drunk! i swear, sometimes i shock myself. i just picked the highest dollar deduction on the form.))
is this a crime? drunk tax filing?
((it's not funny, i know))

so no one has any lightning flash lunch ideas?

i hope i'm not sounding obnoxious?

so i made it home without drinking, again.
not to put myself down, but it does feel somewhat like a miracle.
i thought about having a nice cold glass of Pinot and sushi.
then i knew i wouldn't be able to stop at one and i'd mess up my nights sleep and self esteem in the mix.
so here i am ... being productive!
this is another issue for me. wine was sort of my only 'off' time.
i need to do my grades tonight.
i worked all last week-end, and the week-end before and the week-end before that.
when i drink i stop working.
okay so let's get through the week before i freak about the week-end.

i am doing really well! i have to get through the week and then to two... then it will get easier.

[1967]

V as in Victory!

hi.
i didn't post this morning cause i have trouble accessing this site in the morning for some reason?

i didn't drink. it was close though. i drove in front of the restaurant, but kept going it was that close.
i kept saying 'go ahead, if u think you can have just one. we know you can't! and your not gonna be happy with yourself tomorrow! at all... your gonna feel bad... but if that is what you want go ahead!"

so here i am.
somebody stole my itouch today at work.
i'm so sad about it.
i have more work to do but what is the point?

i almost went back out after i got home (i had hoped i had amnesia and left it here this morning) to buy another then thought 'u'll just go drink somewhere and what the hell is the point in that?'
tomorrow you'll be hung over and even sadder about your iTouch.
Maybe... somehow... it will turn up?

i bought it so i wouldn't always be nervous about forgetting things AND because music improves my mood. god, i'm glad it wasn't a lap top! i've been wanting one for my classroom and afraid to buy it as it could very well be stolen.
so sad.

i am happy i'm not drinking in a restaurant just now.
i am tired but i'll feel better tomorrow that i'm not hung over.
i won't have the challenge in my mind of 'well, you didn't feel so bad today.. see what you can drink on friday night? no school saturday!'

nope.
no regrets and i will imagine the return of my iTouch.
"I touch... come home! I need you to sing to me!" No music out of my bose in the morning.
Bummer.

[Lavande]

V as in Victory!

Sorry about your Itouch but glad to hear you didn't drink
You'll feel so much better & proud of yourself in the morning!

Keep up the good work - you're making good decisions!

Lav

[1967]

V as in Victory!

thanks lavande.
i don't know if i'll feel proud but at least i won't be disgusted w/myself.
i need to sleep. i am feeling rather miserable and blue about the human condition.
i wish i were not so sensitive and could let things roll off my back more.
maybe i will get there?
i know i am doing much better, just a snag today. i will be visualizing good things for me ahead.