What is involved in 100 percent committment?

[Doggygirl]

What is involved in 100 percent committment?

Hi July!! I always look forward to your "flybys" and words of wisdom.

And Caysea, this is a post for the ages!! You may not realize how much you have helped me along the way with YOUR passion for sobriety and for life.

caysea;752708 wrote: In reading the responses you can hear and feel the passion we who are having success feel. NO BS nothing will come between us and sobriety. Anyone who expects to be successful has to become passionate about a sober lifestyle. I don't think any of us thought it would be fun without al but how wrong we were. Their is a great life to be lived without al. So great to read and write in strong positive ways. Hope it is helpful to those starting out.

Stay Healthy and Keep Fighting
AF 5-16-08

DG

[Suni]

What is involved in 100 percent committment?

I always look forward to your "flybys" and words of wisdom.

You mean he's swapped the boat for a plane? :-)

[Doggygirl]

What is involved in 100 percent committment?

Suni;753127 wrote: You mean he's swapped the boat for a plane? :-)

July's avatar of the bird, and also his way of stopping in from time to time to see how we are all doing and offer some great words of wisdom. You will get to know July if you stick around for awhile!

[momof3]

What is involved in 100 percent committment?

Yes, this is quite a no BS thread. That is what being Al free is all about. We do have to be passionate about being AF and living a healthy and courageous lifestyle. The great benefit is that it spreads to other areas of life. I find myself so much more honest and passionate about in everything I do. I have shown up in my own life!

[momof3]

What is involved in 100 percent committment?

DG, Great biceps by the way!
M3

[KateH1]

What is involved in 100 percent committment?

I love the NO BS threads! In fact, I love No BS people! When I finally decided that I was going to stop the madness and learn to live a sober life, I knew that it would never get done if I allowed myself or anyone else to BS me about it. I was right! Alcoholism is not a joke, it is not something to play around with. Alcoholism costs the alcoholic everything, relationships, jobs, self esteem, time with family and friends, and ultimately health and even life itself. Is this something that we want to take the attitude of "oh well...yes, I drank, but I'm not perfect, or I am still trying"? The thing is, "slipping" becomes a habit and destroys our resolve. If we accept drinking in a casual, Oh Well...manner. Then falling back into drinking becomes the norm and we do not stop!!

Wew....that felt great!!

[hippie37]

What is involved in 100 percent committment?

Suni;752411 wrote: Following on from:
"What made you want to change badly enough?" -where mostly we all agreed that unless you had fully committed to changing you might not reach your destination I'd like to ask another question to raise awareness.
How can you be sure that you're committed a hundred percent when you make your decision to stop?
I mean what tells you that you are?
How do you know?
And how do you know if you're not?
:thanks:

I wasn't committed 100% when I first tried to stop drinking because I was in denial I ever had a problem in the first place. I would convince myself differently though. I could only accept at an intellectual level that things needed to change and that I suffered with addiction. So every three months (maybe 4 if I was lucky), after trying so hard to stay sober on will-power alone, I would fail miserably. I couldn't even see that I was in denial because I didn't know how to be honest with myself first and foremost. I'd hidden in my little bubble for so long that inside that world I had become accustomed to nothing but manipulation and excuses to keep me safe. I needed to chip away at the layers that defined who I had become to reach the real me before I could get honest with myself and see my life for what it truly was. Only when I could do that could I start to make progress.

I don't think anyone can be sure they're fully committed in the beginning because it's a massive step to take in letting go of the crutch and everyone has doubts as to whether they can do it I would presume.

For me though, I had to reach a place inside myself that made me realise I was completely and utterly beat before I was ready to commit and turn my life around. Rock bottom as they say! Only then was I ready to make the journey upwards again.

I was asked this question whilst in treatment: "Phil, if there was a million pounds waiting for you tomorrow morning if you came into the center on time would you get here?" "Then why don't you see your recovery in the same way?" "This is your life we're talking about.....!".

I can still get lazy at times and think otherwise and maybe not bother with putting in any effort to staying on track. But I do know where it will lead me if I get too complacent with it. So if I'm not committed the simple answer is I will know because I'll be back in the gutter before you know it!

Love and Light
Phil
xx

[Davie Souter]

What is involved in 100 percent committment?

As a Newbie I love this thread.
One of my main battles is ambivalence. Thinking stuff like " if you were away for the weekend with the lads it would be alright to have a drink" etc. This certainly weakens my resolve. But I understand from you guys that I have to 100% commit to quitting no exceptions and reaffirm to myself that under no cirumstances does booze have place in my life.

Thanks

[Starlight Impress Forever]

What is involved in 100 percent committment?

Hey Davie,
As something of a relative `oldie`, I too love this thread. :H

There have been a couple of times in the past, when the `preachings` of long-term AF members have caused a little controversy, here at MWO.........sometimes we can be perceived as the `do-gooders`, hell-bent on telling others that AF is the only life worth living, whereas, us long-termers are not at all like that, save for telling others how good we`re finding life now that we`ve reached the other side of alcohol abuse.

I like to think that I conjure up an image of tranquility and fun..........I am both much more at peace with myself and much more fun since I ousted the drink from my each and every day. Each to their own, as I say..........far be it from me to tell anyone to quit drinking.........I`m nothing special..........merely someone who`s made a commitment to myself to remain AF for life..........is the only way I can function now.........for me, AF is a joyous way to live my life, but that`s ME..........I can`t say how it would be for anyone else.........we are all very different, after all.

I think a definite commitment to AF is an enormous decision for any of us to make. I applaud those successfully moderating, (it all but broke my heart when I realised that I was a pitiful candidate for moderation :H), but I think people have to be honest with themselves as to whether or not they are succesful as regards moderating..........if one is on one`s 99th attempt at moderation, is it not time that one accepted that moderation is merely a pipe-dream for them, as indeed it was for myself ?

Kate, you made me laugh with your no BS, because, let`s face it, before you or I or anyone else got a handle on this thing commonly termed alcoholism...........we were indeed full of it...........BULLSHIT, that is !!! :H

I hope this post doesn`t cause offence..........I am in no way mocking or undermining just how difficult it is for anyone to get their AF show on the road.........I`ve been there, don`t forget.........I am merely saying how I can look back at my former drunken self, and whilst I wouldn`t actually laugh at `her`, I can look at her in disbelief, for it is almost inconceivable that.........`her`, was in fact.........me.

All I am saying is that, in all honesty, if I could and did become sober, so can anyone.........anyone, that is, who wants sobriety ABOVE ALL ELSE. I would never have believed I had it in me, but I did, didn`t I ?

There is not a single member on this site who doesn`t have what it takes to become sober. Sobriety lies within your very soul..........you already have it..........you only need to rouse it.

Much love,

Star x

[KateH1]

What is involved in 100 percent committment?

Ha! Ha! Starlight.....yep! Problem drinkers/alcoholics certainly are full of BS! And I also understand how weird it is to look back and think....WOW! What a bunch of BS that woman was slinging....Yep! That was me.

I cannot speak for anyone but myself. But, I do disagree with Hippie. I resolved to stop drinking many a time, for one reason or another. But, when I finally comitted to stopping, it was different. To me saying one wants to quit and making half arsed attempts is NOT comitting.....Comitting is entirely different. This is when the resolve is there....the no BS is there and we finally stop drinking. That is not to say it is an easy road once one is comitted, as Starlight says, I have been there and there is Nothing Easy about it, not even when one is comitted. But, stopping is possible for anyone that truly comitts and does the work!

XX Kate

[Doggygirl]

What is involved in 100 percent committment?

Hippie, I think I understand what you are saying. When I first came here and started out, I too *thought* I was committing to get sober. I failed to understand exactly how deep my addiction ran, and I falied to understand that I really was holding something back for AL, even though I didn't *think* I was at the time.

In other words - I was not being 100% rigorously honest with myself. But I didn't realize it - that's how deep my own BS ran at the time. Which is sort of what I think we're all saying...that we lie to ourselves first and foremost. For me, I didn't realize for quite awhile that I was indeed, BSing myself about AL.

Kate - I can appreciate how good it feels to express the opinion (which I share!!) about "slipping." :H I really hate that word. It sounds like something that is 1) an accident and 2) minor. A choice to drink for me was a RELAPSE. It was NOT an accident and the consequences were NOT minor.

OK - now I feel good that I have contributed to one of those "Oh Jeez Here Come the Boring Sober People" threads....

DG

[hippie37]

What is involved in 100 percent committment?

Thanks DG! Your thoughts were right on the mark!!

You saved me a post there!

Love and Light
xx

[Suni]

What is involved in 100 percent committment?

Hello all,
Thanks again for all the generous, honest and enlightening answers to the questions I posed.
Like others I have been knocked out by the quality of the responses and it strikes me that as well as having shared in delusions that go with being addicted, we all share something else. We are all a lot brighter than we think.
When we really want to change something in our lives nothing can stop us.

At the same time, though we share the dependency and all the damage that goes with it, we are all unique in age, gender, life-experience, circumstances, but more importantly beliefs and attitudes, and it is my feeling that your attitude to alcoholism and the beliefs you hold about it, and about yourself, will underpin your success in giving up.

Phil, thanks for your honest post. You say:

I don't think anyone can be sure they're fully committed in the beginning because it's a massive step to take in letting go of the crutch and everyone has doubts as to whether they can do it I would presume.

It’s not a surprising thing to say, knowing the intensity of the addiction, but I’m going to take the bold step of saying that I AM fully committed in the beginning because I have the chosen to believe that I am. As I said right at the start I don’t intend to live with any doubts about this. (Day 26)

Now, I know that there is no way of you or anyone else knowing just how committed that makes me, since it’s a website forum and I could be spinning you any old claptrap but I guess you will just have to track my progress and note any incongruence in what I do and in what I say because I intend to be around here for a while.

I hope that you, or anyone else who wants to know will come back to me in a year and asked me how I could know that I would sure and I promise I will deliver my answer in full technicolor!

Meanwhile,

A passionate SOBER cheerio to all!

[Doggygirl]

What is involved in 100 percent committment?

Suni, I think your attitude and committment is remarkable!! I hope you don't take any of the posts as suggesting that YOU are not committed. All any of us can share is what we have discovered from our own experience, and there are similarities as well as differences for all of us.

I will say that you seem to be really diving into this quite seriously, and that bodes well for you. Keep reading and sharing and listening. You are doing great!!

DG

[KateH1]

What is involved in 100 percent committment?

"Oh Geeze, here comes another boring sober people thread" DG

This really made me laugh this morning!! Funny how so many think that drinkers are "Fun", "Interesting" and all around entertaining!! LMAO What drunks are they hanging out with????
Or is it because they never remember how the night ends???

IMO...Sober People are Amazing!! We laugh because something is really funny....not like a booze driven recorded laugh track! We are interesting, because we can complete a thought and then remember it! Our mood does not suddenly and wthout reason, turn dark! We can be counted on to do what we say we will do and we can drive ourselves home!!

XX Kate