af daily Thu 7 Jan

[bear73]

Good morning all from snow land, I'm working at home again today as now lots of ice on top of the snow.

Well it's day 7 for me here - feeling good except for the darn cold which is hanging on - think I will breathe over some eucalyptus and hot water later tonight.
I'm all stuffed up still - been over 2 weeks now - it's a good value cold!

Enjoying cosying in with OH and dvds - plan to do some exercise on the rebounder later tonight - ate LOTS of chocolate yesterday so I will be getting back on the 1200 calories a day wagon today.

Already feeling stressed and inadequate about work - I am going to get on top of this.
I am working on switching off more efectively after work/not letting comments damage my self esteem/interpreting events in a way that damages my self esteem.

Good day to everyone

[cowgal]

af daily Thu 7 Jan

day 1

i am starting all over AGAIN! figured it couldn't hurt to start posting here again, did a while back, I am just so fed up, not drinking anymore. hit the f'it switch yesterday AGAIN, feeling like a total failure AGAIN................going to an AA meeting and picking up another white chip, need all the help I can get, need people I can depend on. I love this site, u have saved my life so many times, and again, I am back w/ determination and fessing up that i really fucked up yesterday, am sick of myself, but will forgive myself eventually...........................

lost of love,:h:h

MA

[bear73]

af daily Thu 7 Jan

Make sure you do forgive yourself,beating yourself up just makes things harder (I have a degree in it!), I also find it makes lapsing more likely for me.

Try to learn from your triggers, plan how you can handle them differently and you can move on. Today is a new day and a fresh start, yesterday is gone and tomorrow will take care of itself when it arrives.

I had 3 months af last year and lapsed. I'm on day 7 here.
I haven't been to AA meetings but their book 'living sober' has helped me a lot.

It also helped me to re-read the tool box item on the abs forum and to list why I want to be af/why I don't want to drink.

I also remind myself to take one day at a time/one hour at a time if need be.
Sending you positive thoughts.

[greeneyes]

af daily Thu 7 Jan

morning abbers!

A week bear!! Congrats!!

MA, welcome back! Keep your chin up and your big girl pants on!

Brrrrr! Must go out of town today but not to far & hope to get back before the snow/rain that is forcast. Little cars don't like that kind of weather.

I scored some ham yesterday from a friend and will put on some bean soup before I leave. Don't ya just love to come home to dinner in the crock pot? Especially in the cold weather.

Don I'm so glad you're loving the way you feel!

Have a throughly wonderful thursday!

[cowgal]

af daily Thu 7 Jan

thanks guy!

I need all the support I can get now, looking in the wrong places lately, this is it..................and AA, I am back on track now................one day at a time, and forgiving myself, BIG TIME!!!


love,:h

MA

[Lavande]

af daily Thu 7 Jan

Good morning Abbers!

Good job on your 7 days bear - that's the way to go!! Hope your cold leaves soon - hate being sick!

Welcome MA! Definitely revise your plan - make sure you are prepared to handle your triggers without AL. It takes planning & practice but you can do it

Greenie, my crockpot gets a total workout this time of year. Almost as good as coming home to a meal prepared by Mom!

Busy week in my shop but it makes the time go fast.........
Better get to it
Have a great AF Thursday everyone!
Lav

[jessie]

af daily Thu 7 Jan

Hi CG,
I also messed up big time, and that after 9 whole AF days in a row. It's difficult not to beat myself up - but I suppose self loathing will not help at all. Let's just get up and start again.
Good luck

[KateH1]

af daily Thu 7 Jan

Good Morning All and All to Come!

Bear....Well Done on your 7 Days!! Keep it going!

MA and Jessie...take some deep breaths...review your Plan and Begin Again. You can do it....just really focus! Alcohol...does not help us through a bad day, it creates Bad Days! I swear, that alcohol depression and anxiety is the worst! AF time.....really, really helps with this!

Lavende....happy to hear that your shop is busy! Coming home to the smells of a crock pot dinner sounds lovely!

Greenie, A new avatar for you....The Energizer Bunny with a Hoola Hoop!

Have a Good Day All!

[com1]

af daily Thu 7 Jan

I am on AF day 7 as well and plan on Day 8 tomorrow. ODAT is my chosen avenue.

Congratulations to all on your AF days. Every day is one more victory over the most devious foe.

Com

[Raven.joy]

af daily Thu 7 Jan

Hey Bear I am also in Uk dealing with snow and cold unprecedented in my town and its all a bit bizzare, keep he home fires burning.

[cowgal]

af daily Thu 7 Jan

Thanks

I appreciate all the warm support here, glad to be back on here!!:h

Kate, Jesse, Lavande, you are all sweet, will check in every day from now on, I NEED to stay sober, going through a horrible ugly divorce, scared, lonely, just a mess..................need u guys!!! Thanks for everything!!!:thanks::thanks::thanks:

love,:l:h

MA

[Doggygirl]

af daily Thu 7 Jan

Hello Ab Landers! No time for drinking around here, that's for sure. I still can't imagine how I got through life at all when I spent the majority of my time planning to drink, drinking, or recovering from drinking. Our business suffered as so many others did over the last year. We are encouraged by an uptick already here in January. Seems that some projects that were "on hold" are loosening up. I hope and pray this is a positive sign about the economy in general and a good sign for all the small business people who have been struggling - and of course the trickle effects to layed off people, etc. I hope this lasts, but with my new "world view" we'll just take it one day at a time and not worry about that which cannot be controlled - the future economy. (at least I sure can't control it LOL!)

Congrats to everyone on their progress in AFness and UnHungness! Welcome to new and returning AFers! It's great that we are kicking some AL a$$ around here to get the New Year off to a great start!

In a recent AA meeting, we were talking about TOTAL acceptance / surrender to the fact that as an alkie, I cannot ever drink safely. I realized that a contributing factor to the struggles I had getting and staying AF had at least in part to do with the fact that I was still holding out a bit of "secret hope" that maybe I COULD get this thing under control and someday have "one drink." As long as I kept the tiniest hope alive of that possibility, my AF days were a WHOLE lot harder than they needed to be.

I couldn't completely move on to working on positive growth and development of an AF life until I completely accepted that I'm an alkie, and that as such I just can't drink without consequence.

It feels good to know for sure that I finally have that burden of acceptance off my shoulders. For a long time, I *thought* I got it, but I can see now I was holding a little something in reserve for old AL, sort of like a secret desire for a lost love.

Just thought I'd throw that out there as food for thought in case it's of interest to anyone else in AbLand.

Have a great AF all!

DG

[Angelcakes]

af daily Thu 7 Jan

Hi abbers...DG, It is of great interest to me as this 'acceptance' is the one thing that has truely been holding me back. I guess I fool myself because I can occasionally have a couple of drinks & stop (although it's always a struggle to stop)
At the moment I'm really trying to find that "I am an alkie & I can't ever drink safely" I wish I could just get it through my head. I amaze myself that I seem to hold such an allegiance to something so totally useless...debillitating even.
Todays day 3 for me and IT WILL be a great AF day.
Thankyou!!

xo

[Chief]

af daily Thu 7 Jan

DG, I'm with you. Day 4 here and I'm feeling great. I have accepted the fact that I can't drink...ever. And there's nothing wrong with that. All I have to do to feel better, look better, be happier, more productive, not feel guilty, etc. is simply not drink alcohol. If you made that offer to a "social" drinker they would say..."That's it?...that's all I have to give up?.....I'll take that deal anytime".

Well, so have I.

I've finally "got it" again and I feel better than I have in months. I feel like I've dug myself out of this deep hole and I'm finally on top looking down into it instead of looking up from the bottom.

I'm grateful to this site and all the people here who have stuck with me during this serious relapse of mine.

I'm back and I'll help anyone get out of the hole....:l

Don

[retteacher]

af daily Thu 7 Jan

DG & Chief: I too am in the "can't have even one" category. For today, I don't even slightly miss it. I must admit that when I hear some of the stories at AA meetings, I get into the stinkin' thinkin' of "I'm not that bad." However, I was bad. Normal drinkers do not get taken to the ER dead drunk.

Chief: It's good to see you back here at MWO. Mary