January:Just Do It~AF~Week 2

[redhibiscus]

January:Just Do It~AF~Week 2

Yay! it's Friday. Interesting to read of people feeling blue. It just hits you out of nowhere sometimes. Last week was really hard for me, for some reason, this week has been better. This time of year is sooooo hard. We are having a little January thaw and it really helps. Hope lil, LBH and sooty are feeling better today.

LBH, I can relate to wanting to drink when your husband leaves. About a year ago, my husband was out of town for five days. I had a bottle of wine an evening, talking on the phone. Deadly. Not a good idea. But I did it.

Spedtech, sorry you are still getting harrassed about last January. Keep your head held high and know you are on a better path. Honestly, I think sometimes people are just scared and don't want a repeat. This alcohol thing makes family members angry and helpless. I know one time my son went to my husband and said, "Why do you let mom drink like that?" :upset:How humilitating to relive that memory. I have never told anyone that one before, whew, a good reminder for me to stay AF this weekend.

I found a quote I would like to share:

It is good to have an end to journey towards;
but it's the journey that matters in the end.
Ursula K. LeGuin

No matter where we are right now, we have all made strides in our life journeys, trying to live AF lives. We are learning about ourselves daily, sharing with each other, with support and encouragment. Again, I appreciate all or you and have learned and continue to learn how to live life AF. Thanks. :h

[dill]

January:Just Do It~AF~Week 2

Greetings JJDI's!
Red, thank you for the lovely quote. This journey has been made rich and its burden lighter, by getting to know you and all who post on this thread. The only way we can overcome some of the humiliation we have felt and pain we have caused is to do what we are doing, and keep on doing it! Time will take care of the rest. Sped, Now that you mention it, the phone call notes were not of much use. I still shudder at the number of times I talked on the phone focused on 90% me and alcohol and 10% whomever was on the other end. Lav, Lil, LBH, Cyn, Man, SD, MM, Pnut, Lode, Soots, everyone, have an AF day!

OH! I am available Sat. and Sun. at 4:00 EST, too. Chat would be fun!

[Lavande]

January:Just Do It~AF~Week 2

Good morning all!

Happy Friday, happy January thaw! Temps in the upper 40's today - woo hoo!
I'm glad to hear that our 'group mood' is lifting a bit This time of year is just hard, regardless of what else is going on!! We should jump on chat tomorrow......I certainly will if I can. Never totally sure how my weekends are going to go. More often than not my kids are here looking for free food

Lots of work waiting for me so I'd better get to it!
Wishing everyone a terrific AF Friday!
Lav

[cyntree]

January:Just Do It~AF~Week 2

Checking in early - had a particularly long and heart-wrenching day yesterday, involving a dear old friend flying into my city and needing help. I wasn't even supposed to be here, I just happened to be in town because of my presentation on Wednesday, and so I have been able to help. I will explain more later --I'm just so eternally grateful for all of your help keeping me on the Sober Bus, so that I could be there for my firiend.

Yes - I'll come up with a Virtual Ball for us all to attend! You have no idea how much I would like to click the heels of my ruby slippers and bring you all here - but then I'd press you into service, so better stick with the virtual version! Dill, unfortunately I will continue to be Switzerland for the next month, but then I plan on moving on to Finland. As far as your house goes, I can certainly recommend my favorite organizing books, they're filled with great heart and hope.

More later, sending love and AF wishes for all this weekend.

[sdlovespackers]

January:Just Do It~AF~Week 2

Good Morning!!
Yea it's Friday!!!! This was a loooong week, but they seem to drag when you're excited for the weekend!! I would LOVE to join you all on chat again...it was a blast...however after my son's (FIRST) basketball game tomorrow morning we are hopping in the car and driving to Minneapolis!!! I'm so excited for the game! We're taking my brother and his girlfriend out for dinner....yea...good food--we don't have crap here for restaurants!!!

Have to tell you all about my struggle last night...I got done with my night class (School Law) early and thought about zipping through the drive through and picking up a bottle of wine or beer...I couldn't decide which one would give me more of a 'quick buzz'....so I figured on the wine....I LITERALLY got about a block from the store when all of a sudden my mindset did a 180! And all of a sudden I started thinking...if you had one bottle you'd probably want another...you'd have to hide it from your son or start drinking after he goes to bed....your going to wake up feeling like total crap....so then at the last minute I decided nope going home and eating a late dinner...but then the stop light at the corner of the drive thru turned red...ugh!!! I thought and laughed to myself...ha! This is a test...one I'm going to pass...sat there and drove right on home, went to bed sober, woke up feeling great (well ok tired, but not hungover!!!) I HONESTLY thought of all of you here and it helped SOOOO MUCH to keep on driving!!! Thank you!!!

Well....I'm chuggin' along on my pink happy bus if anyone would like to join me...wait!! Maybe I should paint it Purple since I'm going to see my (fake) husband Brett this weekend!!! :H Hey if Lav can dream of gardening in the winter, I can dream of Brett Whatever keeps us warm inside!!
Have great Friday!!!!
SD

[FindingMyself]

January:Just Do It~AF~Week 2

Quickly checking in to say hi and wish everyone an AF day!

SD - that story about a student bringing in his mother's toy made me laugh.

The last couple of days have been a struggle for me. I'm off to work for the day and that will hopefully keep my mind on other things...*sigh* why is this so dang hard?

Wishing you all a great day.

[mandalay]

January:Just Do It~AF~Week 2

Hi to everyone

My first chance to check in for days! I've been so busy with work and by the time I get home from meetings and finish the paperwork it's been just too late. I've just been reading through about four pages of posts from everyone that I've missed, wow! Brilliant on the big temptations that you've overcome this week, that's so good. Sorry some of you are on the blues bus - mine will probably call at my stop somewhere around your mid summer, when I shall be in the middle of my Antipodean winter. Right now, for me it is blue skies and sunshine, so it helps me not to feel down. I am so sorry to hear of the sad and trying times that some people have had this week; please forgive me for not naming people - I need to sort my computer out, if I spin back to an earlier page it often signs me out even when it says I am signed in, then I write my post and hey presto it disappears into the ether. Aaargh!

I do remember one question directed at me - Dill I think.... I am Australian on my father's side and English on my mother's but lived in England till 2000. Thank you for being interested.

Shame I won't be able to join in the chat - it would be too early for me (3am!) but never mind, I will be happy just to keep reading all the posts, and such inspirational quotes. A very busy day for me today as it's finally 'moving day' for my daughter and little grandson. He is feeling very insecure I t hink, seeing everything all packed in boxes and every day a little more of his life is moved to the strange house several streets away. Last evening all the furniture and beds went....he was supposed to spend last night with us, but when I went to fetch him from his empty 'old' house he sobbed hysterically and said he wanted to stay with mummy and help her clean. Not even the promise of biscuits and a late night viewing of Thomas The Tank Engine could change his mind! So the two of them will have spent the night on one single size inflatable mattress - how much sleep they will have got is anyone's guess.... I see that my daughter was actually on Facebook at 1am!!! Oh well, gotta rush as I've bribed him to come to ours today by promising a McDonalds breakfast! By the time we get to his 'new house' mummy will have set up his bedroom and put all his toys in place, so hopefully it won't be such a scary experience.

Catch everyone late, have a great evening and a terrific AF weekend. Love to all and sorry I am not naming everyone, just know you are all in my thoughts.

Mandalay

[sooty]

January:Just Do It~AF~Week 2

Hi everyone, hope Friday was ok for all of you and that the blues bus has remained safely locked in the garage.
Its coming up to 8.30 p.m. here and I'm feeling really tired, so I'm going to sign off now, watch some rubbish tv and then take myself off to bed with my library book.
Have a good rest of the day and I'll hopefully catch up with you in chat tomorrow
love Sooty

[cyntree]

January:Just Do It~AF~Week 2

SD - fabulous job - that defines a 'drive-by'. Have a wonderful time at your son's game tomorrow, enjoy the food (I used to live in Mpls - where are you going to eat?), and sweet dreams of Brett.

Man - great to hear about your grandson stories; moving is a trauma not matter what age you are. Red - thanks for this mornings post, glad you're feeling better. Finding - big hugs to you, I'm sorry you're having a struggle, thanks for sharing - remember that this too shall pass. Sooty - sweet dreams! Lav and Dill, always great to hear from you. Everyone - thinking of you.

I'll try to do chat tomorrow - it's a work day for me, but post the time again, will you? I'll do my best to hop on...
I've just driven another 2 hours to my 'job' city, fed and walked the dogs, and I'm kind of wrung out from the last couple of days so I'm going to have a quiet study evening. More tomorrow, or I'll catch you in chat...take care, sending all big AF vibes for the weekend.

[lilmea]

January:Just Do It~AF~Week 2

Checking in for the evening. Another day done and dusted. (Soots I love being able to say that!)

Red-Thank you for the lovely quote. Long term AF is the goal but it's the daily af days that will get us there.

Cyn-So sorry to here about your friend. But so glad you were 'there and present' for her.

SD-Do you have those same kind of drive-thrus as Dill? Geesh! I am so glad we don't have those here. I have just now began to feel safe driving by the liquior store! Good job on driving straight home.

Finding-Hang in there. It really does get easier you know. :l

Mandalay-I've been having trouble staying logged in as well. What's up with that? If you figure it out, let me know. I hope your grandson is feeling better in his new home soon.

Hello to LHB, Lode, Open, Sped and MM. Hope the day was a good one for you all.

Dill, Lav, Sooty and anyone else, I hope to talk to you all on chat tomorrow.

Wishing everyone a peaceful, af evening.

[lilmea]

January:Just Do It~AF~Week 2

Hi Cyn-cross post!

[Lavande]

January:Just Do It~AF~Week 2

Evening friends,

Got my work done, caught 10 min. of the sunshine outside before it disappeared, picked up a 3 lb. box of fresh mushrooms (directly from the grower for $4 - great deal), made a big pot of mushroom soup - YUM

SD - you can dream about Brett if you like At my age gardening dreams are more realistic, ha ha!

cyn, Ms Sooty's sober bus is carrying us all - don't worry!

Finding - I think 'this thing is so dang hard' because it's sooo important! Keep hanging in with us - it IS worth it, I promise!

mandalay, your moving story about your grandson reminds me of what we went through with our daughter. She was 2 1/2 when we moved - we bought my parent's house & I figured since she was already familiar with the house - we wouldn't have a problem. She cried for 2 days - I want to go HOME! Nothing is ever easy

Sooty, I made my mushroom soup vegetarian style today - good!! Hope you are staying warm!

Putting my feet up - see you all in the morning!
Lav

[Lavande]

January:Just Do It~AF~Week 2

HI cyn & Lil - cross post!

[lodestar]

January:Just Do It~AF~Week 2

Hi there friends,

Damn, it's been a busy week. I'm afraid there is too much going on in this little ol' brain to keep track of all the goings-on! Anyway, I just saw Lav's avatar wink FOR THE FIRST TIME. I've been here 3 months looking at it and never saw that before. I thought I'd gone around the bend with fatigue and I just kept sitting there staring and staring at it, willing my eyes not to blink, and sure enough it winks! Pleeeeeaaaasssee tell me someone else sees it too :H

I'm so proud of all of our accomplishments. I look at the strength here and am amazed at what we have all been able to do around letting go of that stranglehold on alcohol (or rather, it's stranglehold on us).

I'm trying to get some friends together next weekend when I have my sister visiting, so I emailed a few people and suggested getting together for drinks and food at some point. My friend emailed back and said he hoped I was back on the "beverage train-haha." He's a great friend and very supportive, although I realize that statement might not sound like it at first. You know what I like though? He doesn't treat me any differently because I stopped using alcohol. He makes jokes just like always and wants to be around me just the same. He doesn't judge me.

I thought about responding and saying, nope I'm still not drinking alcohol but I don't want to do that because he was joking around like he would with anyone. It doesn't matter where we go ~ I've been out a lot of times with them and not had any alcohol. If I'm going to drink, it isn't the place that causes it ~ it's the choice I make. I am no longer alcohol-dependent, so I think it is about choice. My worst drinking occurred at home, alone, and I've managed to avoid that everyday for the past 11 weeks (which is nothing short of a miracle, I tell ya). There are two people who I've been uncomfortable around during this sober time, and the reason is that they act like I can't be around alcohol. This really bothers me. "Oh, we can make it an alcohol-free party since you're not drinking" or "Let's go to dinner here because they don't serve alcohol." It bugs me!! It's one thing to ask if I have a preference (I'm a smoker and I do that with my social partners all the time), but it is another to be coddling. No thanks. The people I'm most comfortable around just do their own thing and I do mine ~ and I still want to be invited to happy hour and stuff.

I'm an adult, I can go out and buy alcohol anytime I want to, I've chosen not to do that repeatedly without someone's watchful eye. I don't know how others feel but if people treat me differently, like they have to be careful with me or something, then I feel disempowered and it makes me want to say to them: This isn't about you, okay? It's my choice, for my life ~ what you do is not going to be what "saves" me. :chute:

Okay, rant over. Whew, I don't think I would have even known I thought all that if I didn't write it out to you guys.

I have not been able to determine a long term goal about alcohol use, or perhaps I should just say I have not wanted to set myself up for failure by saying "I will never drink again." I'm not there. I know I won't drink today and that is the very best I can do. Frankly, drinking scares the hell out of me because of how terrible I felt about myself before I stopped and the thought of having a drink right now makes me gag. Maybe it's the supplements ~ I really know in my heart that they work and I was super skeptical about that.

Anyway, sorry for the stream of consciousness post. I guess I needed to talk.

Sending :h to all who post and those that lurk

[ladybirdheart]

January:Just Do It~AF~Week 2

Goodness, Lode, your rant was right on. I make little jokes about not drinking, but if anybody actually treated me as if I could not be around alcohol, I would freeze like a small deer in the headlights holding a martini. I am making it through without booze one more day, but in the last couple of weeks I have felt more and more like a verse from Eleanor Rigby, just marking time. I shall try and make chat as last time I laughed myself silly but I may take a little jaunt out of the city. Either way I shall be with you. Love, Ladybird.