Tomorrow will be day 1-nervous

[Time4Change1]

Hi guys, Ive done this before but the past year my alcoholism has gotten TERRIBLE, now daily drinkign even. Tomorrow i plan to start my month af with the new drug baclofen and i will also take antabuse so i do not mess up. im scared-but will post here often. how do you guys get through the first few days!? also does anyone believe that brain chemistry and change and a person can try moderating after awhile or will you just go right back to crazy obsessions with alcohol if you start drinking again?

[Marshy]

Tomorrow will be day 1-nervous

Hi Time4Change1,

Good for you for taking such a positive step!
First few days - distraction and substitution. Do other things to take your mind off drinking, change your routines, and have lots of AF drinks available as substitutes.
You can do it!
Oh, are you seeing a doc for the meds? Seems a bit harsh on your liver to take both, esp as Antabuse by itself will mean you can't drink.

[KateH1]

Tomorrow will be day 1-nervous

Time 4,
It sounds like you are truly "mourning" the thought of letting alcohol go out of your life. Just know that this is very normal in these early days of sobriety. But, if you do the work to truly change your life style, your interestests and activities and the inner work of changing the "addict within" you will find that living without alcohol is "Truly Living!".

As for an alcoholic every being able to "mod"....honestly, I do not believe that is possible. I have seen the proof right here on this board, as well as in real life. But, the good news is, that a couple of years ago, when I was first getting sober, my personal goal was to mod, I could not imagine giving up alcohol for life, even though I was well aware of all the misery and heartache that alcohol caused in my life. I look back to that time and wonder how I could ever think that way! These days, I am grateful to be happy living without alcohol and the thought of taking a drink is just no longer an option!

Good Luck!

[IAD]

Tomorrow will be day 1-nervous

DAY ONE: It feel like your writing an entry in a log after the Apocalipse...Ha! It'll seem like that at first , but as time goes by you'll be able to deal with it better. Hang in their Time4, lots of good support here....Knowlege you can't find anywhere else...except maybe at AA meetings.....Try what ever is going to work for you.....everyone is different ! Good Luck. IAD.

[hiddengoal]

Tomorrow will be day 1-nervous

Time4Change -

If you are a reader, "Drinking, A Love Story" might be a good read for you the first weeks. Its just a woman's story, but it is well written, an easy read, and very insightful about what 'drives the drink' and the life-chaos that results'. Yet, she is 'normal', like you & I.

Good Luck! There are many of us in the first month with you so stay close!

[Doggygirl]

Tomorrow will be day 1-nervous

Hi time4Change. I too enjoyed the book that HG mentions. I could really identify with so much of that woman's journey.

I can also relate to where it seems you are - what Kate described about not being able to imagine a life without alcohol. How will I have fun? How will I handle stress? How will I "loosen up" socially? What will people think? Etc. etc. I am another example of a person who can say that my life post - drinking is about a trillion times better than it was the last several many years of my drinking career. I am so grateful to be done with it.

The odds are not very good of going from being a real problem drinker (alcoholic, whatever you like to call it) to a person who can drink safely and moderately. I finally figured out it's easier not to look at things too far down the road, and just take it one day at a time.

I agree with Marshy about having a lot of things lined up to do. Things that will NOT take you in the vicinity of your drinking patterns, at least initially. I made written lists of things to do that included not only "chore" type stuff but also fun things that I had cut myself off from while drinking. (are there museums or other places like that you would like to see? Get a library card? Start an exercise program? Movies you want to see?) Having an actual written list was very helpful when I would find myself in the throes of a really stubborn craving. I didn't have to *think* in order to find something to do to distract myself. And now I have clean closets. :H

Strength and hope to you. I was a daily drinker for the better part of 30+ years. If I can stop the madness, I know you can do it too.

DG

[retteacher]

Tomorrow will be day 1-nervous

Time: I'm an alcoholic who cannot take even one drink. That thought would have thrown me for a loop a while back, but now that I have some sober time under my belt, I wouldn't want to live any other way. I KNOW I would go right back into the obsession w/just one sip.

I've found AA very helpful. There is an Alcoholics Anonymous site where you can find meetings near your home. Also, there is a weekly AA thread here on the abs forum. That might help clear up any confusion.

Try not to think too far into the future. Take your abs one day at a time. It's less overwhelming especially in the beginning.

mary

[Time4Change1]

Tomorrow will be day 1-nervous

Thanks guys! i will take all your advice. very good advice. Ill be on here updating. Today is day 2, and i feel a million times better than yesterdday, less cravings, and im excitied for feeling normal again. the baclofen already i think helps. usually on the second day id still want to drink but today i feel much less craving then normal on a second day. as far as the antabuse to someone who said taking both may not be good on my liver, im gonna stop it after a few weeks.. just wanted to get the first two weeks or so af with it.. Thanks! Plan to try to moderate, but who knows. i might be happier af with how bad the drinkng has become. barely gives me any pleasure anymore.

[Doggygirl]

Tomorrow will be day 1-nervous

Time, congrats on reaching Day 2 AF!! Checking in here is a great way to keep yourself on track.

There is a web site / recovery program called SMART Recovery? | Self Help for Alcoholism & Addiction. One of the tools they use is called a Cost Benefit Analysis (CBA). Here is a link to the simple form. You basically list advantages / disadvantages of drinking, and advantages / disadvantages of NOT drinking. Maybe some of this type of analysis during your 30 day AF period would be helpful when you later reach a point of decision whether to try modding or not.

I did that exercise during the early period of my sobriety and found it rather enlightening. If nothing else, stuff like that will keep you busy so you are not twiddling your thumbs and having urges!!!

Hang in there!

DG

[Time4Change1]

Tomorrow will be day 1-nervous

yeah, i agree excersize helps.. wish i lived in a warm area.. ny is FREEZING right now so i cant take walks whcih i like doing. Being outdoors helps. Did i mention I hate ny? haha.