If you are reading this and it is still Saturday, I wonder: do you also skip to the next chapter in your books? LOL
Anyway, the topic for the day is ?Who do you tell about your struggles with alcohol and how does that affect your recovery??
I think one of the things that people find attractive about MWO is that it can be done in the privacy of one?s home. We are taking affirmative action in an area of our lives that has up until now been terribly out of control. And, if we so choose, we can do it without anyone else knowing ? except, perhaps, for the doctor we go to for the prescription medication. This program can truly be more anonymous than Alcoholics Anonymous, which usually requires some kind of face-to-face interaction.
I find it hard to imagine any of us doing this completely in the closet. [Couldn?t help but throw that in, Susan!] But really ? how healthy is it to keep this thing a secret? Do you only tell your spouse? Do you tell your co-workers? What about the rest of your family? Do you think they didn?t know you had a drinking problem? And if you choose not to tell them, what are the reasons?
I know that for myself, I have told a few close friends about what I am doing with MWO. They are people who have known about my struggle with alcohol for a long time. They have seen me make earnest attempts to moderate on my own, or to quit with AA, and fail. They are happy that I?ve found something that seems to work.
I haven?t mentioned it to my family yet, but I will. Almost everyone in my family drinks heavily (topic for another day) and won?t admit that they could be candidates for such a program as well. They?ll be disappointed to know that I won?t be joining them for cocktails when I visit this Christmas.
And I haven?t come out as an alcoholic at work. Not so sure about that. I saw a therapist for about 6 months, and he explored with me the question of what would happen if I told my boss that I had a drinking problem and asked for time to go to treatment. Keep in mind that I was calling in either sick or late at least once a week due to hangovers. I never did answer this question for myself because I found MWO instead. And I?m still unsure what purpose it would serve for me to come out at work. Except for this ? at some point in the future, if I were known to be a ?reformed? alcoholic, I might be approached by someone who has the same problem and asked how I did it. And then I could pass it on. :h
So I?ve rambled, I guess. But I think it?s important to look at why we choose to tell people. For instance, are you afraid of telling people you have quit drinking because you might fall off the wagon and disappoint them? (What does that say to you?) Are you afraid to be held accountable? Do you think that people will think less of you if they know of your struggles? Or is it simply none of their business? We?ve spent years hiding our drinking from people. (Often times they know and we just didn?t realize it.) But keeping secrets can make us sick, too. Opening up is part of the recovery process.
I certainly don?t think we should broadcast this to the world. I don?t. But it?s good to stop and reflect on who it is we share the information with, and why.
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