Weekly AA Thread - Week of March 1 - March 6

[gyco]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of March 1 - March 6

good morning all,i just tht id say hi,great comments,it is nc to see AA guiding your life s ,soul searching , i beleive is what it s called,i guess i have to lern that not all think the same,a lot of times i cant relate to what people say,in AA,the 1st step i,get,alchoholic i can accept,am i, truthfully i dont no,unmanageable when i drink,yes,so you dont drink,not a problem,for some,stopping,staying stopped,and dealing with the realities of the world,i have a hard time with,do i have to solve the world s problems,no,but i still have to live in the world,i can ignore all,or hide,and sometimes tht is what i see in AA,10 or 20 people hiding in rooms,or a comment ,people dont no im here,yes,they do,we are the ones tht stand out,there is so much good in the rooms,when this program was created,i beleive before it got on the shelves ,these people researched every possible way,in the times to satisfy everyones desire,alchohol is but the part of the 1st step,the second part of the 1st step is the kicker,we dont have to have alchohol,but until we can manage,and i stress we or i can manage my own affairs and accept my fate,which is mine,the other steps like a jiggsaw puzzle wont fit,im babblin,and i beleive tht is the good part of life s many gifts,and ive got you folks,thank gyco

[cpn1004]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of March 1 - March 6

Greetings all from Fort Wayne IN. Thanks for all your posts, it is like attending
a meeting.

[retteacher]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of March 1 - March 6

I didn't know if my life was unmanageable until I really thought about it. I was functional...but is that managing my life? When I was planning drinking, drinking, & recovering from drinking (which was a good deal of time out of my day), was I managing my life? Not really. The addiction was in control. It's nice to know that, as a sober person, I have every minute of my life to make a decision about. I don't always make the right decision, but at least I'm in control of my own life. I think that's what I've come up w/regarding the management issue of the 1st step. Mary

[shine on]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of March 1 - March 6

Hey yall, am fairly new to this, was AF for a week and then the weekend thru me and now I am AF for 4 days and want it to be forever...hate the guilt feelings afterwards, even if you had a good time, any more it's like, why do I do that?? I heard that Hope was our anchor, When we our anchored, we are less likely to get tossed around and tend to stay put, but when hope fades, our life is in turmoil until we cry out for help and reestablish that hope that things can indeed change, and then we have our anchor again and can once again stop the confusion..and proceed forward, thus bringing in faith, which is the substance of things hoped for and the evidence of things unseen. I believe with all my heart that the Good Lord brought me to this website about 2 weeks ago because I was in sheer agony of loosing all hope and having no faith that things could change..I am now a believer that things can change and are already changing. I was so deceived into thinking that I was the only one going thru this mess, and when I found this website purely by accident, I realized that it takes a whole lot more than trying to work it out on your own..Thank you, I am usually just a quiet listener reading all the threads until I feel I have strength to press on..Humility, now that is a real struggle..Here am I help me Lord.

[shine on]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of March 1 - March 6

Hey yall, am fairly new to this, was AF for a week and then the weekend thru me and now I am AF for 4 days and want it to be forever...hate the guilt feelings afterwards, even if you had a good time, any more it's like, why do I do that?? I heard that Hope was our anchor, When we our anchored, we are less likely to get tossed around and tend to stay put, but when hope fades, our life is in turmoil until we cry out for help and reestablish that hope that things can indeed change, and then we have our anchor again and can once again stop the confusion..and proceed forward, thus bringing in faith, which is the substance of things hoped for and the evidence of things unseen. I believe with all my heart that the Good Lord brought me to this website about 2 weeks ago because I was in sheer agony of loosing all hope and having no faith that things could change..I am now a believer that things can change and are already changing. I was so deceived into thinking that I was the only one going thru this mess, and when I found this website purely by accident, I realized that it takes a whole lot more than trying to work it out on your own..Thank you, I am usually just a quiet listener reading all the threads until I feel I have strength to press on..Humility, now that is a real struggle..Here am I help me Lord.

[Horsegirl]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of March 1 - March 6

Good Afternoon All,

Hope all is well with everyone.

:welcome: Shine on,

This is an awesome thread to learn from. Alot of wisdom. I liked what you said about hope being our anchor and then receiving faith. I have been attending AA for only 33 days and already feel so much more hopeful about the future.

I have mentioned before that I live in a small community with only one fellowship, but I feel so blessed to have such an awesome group. Usually I am the only woman at the meetings, but about a week ago a woman who comes about twice a week and lives 40 miles away approached me and stated she would come an hour early on those nights if I felt ready to start the steps. Turns out she is a retired teacher - how cool, huh, Mary

I have met with her twice and she seems great.

Still struggling with the fear of speaking thing, but trying to work on that. The men always bring me the klennex box, because I always cry. They are a fun bunch and I am starting to feel so much more comfortable. Someone on here called that fear a self-centered fear, and I am really trying to understand that. I know that it is must be self-centered somehow, but not able to really "get it" yet. I'll keep working on it, though.

Amazingly enough I have had hardly any physical cravings during this whole month, and I think that is because of the nightly AA meetings. I did most all of my drinking during the evening, so attending meetings has been an awesome distraction. I can leave the meetings, go home and process all that I have heard, and not even think of drinking.

Now its time to really focus on putting alot of effort into understanding and working the program. Just keep telling myself to put the effort into this that I put into drinking, sneaking drinking, and trying to make everything appear normal and functioning on the outside.

Thanks to all for your wonderful insight and wisdom. I'm seriously addicted to this thread now.:H But that is a good addiction.

Good Evening to all!!!!!!!

HG

[retteacher]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of March 1 - March 6

HG: I can't help but think that God put this wonderful woman in your life so that you could work the steps w/someone. You're doing great...I feel very proud of you. I have a hard time speaking at meetings, but I try to say at least a little something when the discussion comes around to me. That's been desentitizing me.

Shineon: I walked around w/so much guilt when I was drinking. I was so desperate at this time last year that I had to join AA or I think I would have lost my sanity. It made a huge difference in my life, though I was scared to death the first few months walking through the doors of the AA meetings. I just made myself do it & sat & listened for all I was worth.

Good luck, Mary

[dancelot]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of March 1 - March 6

Hi, everyone -

I had a good meeting today. It was from the Daily Reflections, on how this is a lifelong process. A lot of us have impatience, and want to just do it and be done with it, but it isn't that way.

There was an individual who has 20 years today. He had an impact on me because he quit at age 55, the same age I am now. A lot of the people my age have been sober for years or it seems that way. I guess if we stop by now or soon, we won't be around to long. Makes one reflect.

I also may be getting a little closer to finding a sponsor - not sure, but I feel it. I did share the story I wrote here concerning my fears and trust issues. I did talk to a couple of women after the meeting and they gave me their numbers, as least as an interim kind of deal. I have a list of numbers from my first meeting at this group, but several women have the same first names, and I'm not sure which one is which! It probably doesn't matter, but I like to know who I'm talking to! I wasn't even planning on talking about that, but you know how sometimes you start talking, and it just kind of heads somewhere of it's own accord. It's interesting how different people have different views on the timeline of doing all this. Someone reminded us how in the BB, at first they covered all the steps in a couple of days. Others take years. I like how we can all differ in our opinions, yet still respect everyone's views.

On the way out the door, someone asked me if I'd like to go to lunch with them, so I got to have lunch with "the guys", all of whom have many years sober. One has 38 years. That's more time sober than I had drinking! The others have 13, 20, 30 at least, 18, and one I don't remember. He's a gentleman my father's (if he was still around) age who's usually very quiet at meetings. He said how long one time, but I'd have to go through my notes. He's very nice though. I got to to hear the two old guys' stories that reminded me of my dad's. I could've jumped in, I knew enough! It's funny how you hear the same stories over and over and over from a parent, and now I'm liking hearing them from two people I don't know well. I guess my perspective's changing again. Not sure where I was going with that. Anyway, that was kind of different. Wow, I'm learning to socialize! It's funny too, they eat at this place often and they tell them they need a table for the AA group. Very nonchalant. Oh well, interesting day for me. I'll keep going with the flow.

Good to hear from you Horsegirl, and welcome to you to Shine On! I always look forward to this thread, and it is nice to see everyone's posts. Keep the meeting going! Have a great day, everyone! :h

[Winefree]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of March 1 - March 6

Interesting DG that they stated an AA table out loud. I went to my first social event after a mtg last week to a place the AA groups eat a lot. They maintain their anonymity while there. One of us said something and mentioned AA out loud and several stated "anonymity" please.

I did enjoy myself and learn at the same time. Somewhat confusing, but I'll keep figuring it out ODAT.

Winefree

[dancelot]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of March 1 - March 6

WF - That comment about identifying themselves was from someone in a group of long term sober guys that go there all the time. I was the only one not in that usual group, and showed up at the last minute with 2 of them. I took no offense to the comment. I thought it's nice they are comfortable enough with who they are, and didn't even think of that. I will keep that in mind so as not to "out" another member inadvertently.

[retteacher]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of March 1 - March 6

Last night's discussion was about listening. Most people said that, regardless of the "quality" of the meeting, they take something from the meeting that applies to their lives. That's certainly true of me. I've been trying hard to connect w/other women, especially my age, & took 2 phone numbers last night. When I look back to a year ago at this time, I'm amazed at the difference in my life. Not on the outside as much as on my internal life.
-no more lying
-no my hiding
-no more pretending I'm ok when I'm not
-no more obsessing
-etc.

Life is not perfect, but this year has taught me that I can get through life's ups & downs wo/a drink. I know now that regardless of how difficult the going gets, it will improve w/the passage of time. I just didn't want to wait it out when I was drinking. I wanted to feel better NOW!

Mary

[cpn1004]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of March 1 - March 6

Greetings from KS. I picked up my 90 day chip yesterday at 630am
mtg. Now I'm watching my 89 yr old mother die. Yikes, life on life's
terms. Hope I can do it.

[retteacher]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of March 1 - March 6

Phil: First, congratulations on the 90 day chip. 90 days of continuous sobriety is great! I commend you. Of course you can do it. Keep that chip in your pocket & touch it often. It represents a huge effort on your part that should keep going on & on. Getting through my father's death & funeral sober was such an accomplishment for me. I was able to be there for my mother in a way I could never have been had I been drinking (even a little). I was able to say some heartfelt words at Dad's funeral which again is something I would have foisted onto my brother had I been drinking. Good luck...I'll say a prayer for you tonight. Mary