Weekly AA Thread - 5/3 - 5/9

[Doggygirl]

Hi everyone! It's a new week so time for a new thread. :wavin: to anyone new. You do not have to be a member of AA to participate in this thread. If you have questions about AA or if you have comments on whatever we happen to be talking about, join in! Here are a couple useful links:

Daily Recovery Readings

Big Book Online

How to find a meeting

I generally do not attend meetings on Mondays these days, so you all are my meeting. I really like the 24-Hours a Day reading today about "Taking it Easy." That is so important for me to do. I can easily get wound up tight as a drum about things that are going on around me. So this is always a good message for me.

Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

A.A. teaches us to take it easy. We learn how to relax and
to stop worrying about the past or the future, to give up
our resentments and hates and tempers, to stop being
critical of people, and to try to help them instead.
That's what "Easy Does It" means. So in the time that's
left to me to live, I'm going to try to take it easy, to
relax and not to worry, to try to be helpful to others,
and to trust God. For what's left of my life, is my motto
going to be "Easy Does It"?

Meditation For The Day

I must overcome myself before I can truly forgive other
people for injuries done to me. The self in me cannot
forgive injuries. The very thought of wrongs means that
my self is in the foreground. Since the self cannot forgive,
I must overcome my selfishness. I must cease trying to
forgive those who fretted and wronged me. It is a mistake
for me even to think about these injuries. I must aim at
overcoming myself in my daily life and then I will find
there is nothing in me that remembers injury, because the
only thing injured, my selfishness, is gone.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may hold no resentments. I pray that my mind
may be washed clean of all past hates and fears.

I especially like the prayer at the end. For me, that prayer is worth saying just in case there is someone listening. Fear and resentment will eat me alive if I let it. Days that are free of resentment and fear are to be treasured for me.

Even if a person DESERVES my resentment because they "did me wrong" the only person a resentment really hurts is me. And I DO find that I am far less likely to have an urge to drink when I am "taking it easy" than when I am all worked up. Best to take it easy, which I am about to go do in my garden.

Strength and hope to all who might be needing some today. Phil, I am so glad to hear you are home.

DG

[retteacher]

Weekly AA Thread - 5/3 - 5/9

Hi DG: The thought for the day couldn't have been more applicable to me. My daughter's results are not available yet, so we have to wait & try not to obsess & worry. I've been praying & talking to God a lot which feels so much more productive than drinking. If it weren't for meetings & prayer, I would be drinking right now, so I'm very grateful I have a program.

Resentment: That's such a difficult one for me. I don't have a lot of them, but I do carry one or two around. One in particular is against a family member who offended & disrepected me & my husb. I just spoke about it to another AA member, & that seems to have eased the poison of it. I understand that I cannot indulge in anger & resentment. That is not good for my sobriety.

I am going to my women's meeting tonight. It feels good to be able to go to a meeting a day if I want to. Sometimes just sitting & listening & reading is incredibly helpful.

Mary

PS: My daughter has been very brave through this whole thing. Today, she went to school as usual & maintained her teaching duties. It was good for her to do that.

[Winefree]

Weekly AA Thread - 5/3 - 5/9

Thanks for starting the thread DG. I don't know how they developed this program with all right things in it that are so difficult and deep. Who would think that resentments would get us into so much trouble. I really like how you deciphered the reading.

Mary, prayers are with you and your daughter.

Winefree

[SweetHereafter]

Weekly AA Thread - 5/3 - 5/9

Winefree - thanks for posting this. I have been seething with resentments all day - at my boyfriend, at the recruiter who rejected me for a job with a one line email after I spent 2 hours crafting careful replies to her questions, at the screaming children in the store and their parents who would not do anything about, even resentment at inanimate objects! Mainly my car. :-)

I am going to take it easy in my mind for the rest of the day (only a hour left). Everything will work itself out. It always does.

[catch22]

Weekly AA Thread - 5/3 - 5/9

Hi everyone and thanks for sharing....
DG.... it funny now im sober i can look back and see how much resentment and anger i had....never though i had any and like you said when someone does something wrong to you it eats you alive.... going back, me and my sister had stop talking there was a lot of arguing between us, she put me through hell not goner go into details, but the funny thing is, it did not bother her she was the happy one. Me i was the one that was left with all the anger inside me wish i had AA then it would of help me a lot to just let go of that anger and resentment inside me, but i was the unhappy one, We are talking now but she missed out on my kids growing up but it was me that had all the resentment and anger inside me not her.

Have to share this with you today on sunday i went to AA meeting not been to this one before but needed to go for some reason i though it started at 8pm but it started at 7pm so i only had half hour, when i walked in i was shocked because i was the only woman there, thank god i knew the guy behind the table anyway at the end this guy next to me had this box and open it, it had different colour coins in there i though he was going to say anyone for a game of cards, but to my surprise he said anyone got through 24hours then a month and it come to 3months and i was so excited like a big kid he give me the 3month coin and i said is there choc'late inside this coin, sometimes i dont think what im saying before i speak, it reminded me of xmas choc'late coins i said i knew i was meant to come tonight and said what keep me to maintained AF was what i put into my actions by keep on going to AA meetings. Also Easy does it, take it easy and to keep it simple. Yes i am very grateful to knew i have AA now, with a big on my face.
Afterwards Went to my brother house on the way home and show him and he said my skin is really looking good he was so please for me that i go AA now, plus he is really doing well which is a bonus.
Got home show my husband he was not over impress i think he was happy for me, also showed my son and daughter and they were happy for me....

Take care and take it easy everyone....:l

[bear73]

Weekly AA Thread - 5/3 - 5/9

that's really inspiring stuff DG - fears are VERY relevent to me at the moment - fear people won't like me, fear I'll be alone, fear I will drink more and more,fear i won't stop smoking,lose weight, fear I will be rejected,fear of doing the wrong thing,fear I'll lsoe my job, fear my cats dying...
Fear just wastes time and creates situations that may or may not be there and makes us get in our own way.

[retteacher]

Weekly AA Thread - 5/3 - 5/9

Everyone: Much food for thought here. Fear: I had to make a list of my fears for my 4th step. I realized as I looked at that list that fear was the foundation for my character defects & my drinking. For me, it's about walking through the fear. I must do what I fear, take chances I wouldn't ordinarily take, go out of my comfort zone, etc. When I do that, the fear dimishes & doesn't rule me as it once did.

Right now, we're carrying on in the face of not knowing my daughter's biopsy results. That's all we can do. I do say the 3rd step prayer & the serenity prayer a lot which helps.

Mary

PS: There's a speaker meeting tonight I'll go to if it doesn't start thundering & lightening.

[mama bear]

Weekly AA Thread - 5/3 - 5/9

Retteacher...
I am a breast cancer survivor and my prayers are with you and your daughter

[retteacher]

Weekly AA Thread - 5/3 - 5/9

Mama: Thank you so much. If that's you in the photo, you sure are beautiful! My daughter is mama bear to 2 little boys. They really need her.

I just got back from a dynamic speaker meeting. The fellow AAer was deaf (w/an interpretor) & had CP. Yes, alcoholism can strike anyone, & AA can reach anyone who wants to get sober. He was an inspiration.

Mary

[retteacher]

Weekly AA Thread - 5/3 - 5/9

Everyone: My daughter Patty's biopsy was negative. We relieved. Mary

[Horsegirl]

Weekly AA Thread - 5/3 - 5/9

:thanks:

Mary for letting us know. We have all been praying for you, your daughter, and her family.

God Bless,

HG

[momof3]

Weekly AA Thread - 5/3 - 5/9

So happy to hear that your daughter's biopsy came back negative Mary.

[Doggygirl]

Weekly AA Thread - 5/3 - 5/9

Mary, so very happy to read that your daughter's tests came out good. I can't even imagine the relief you both must feel along with your family members.

Catch, congratulations!! I wish I could have been there when you got your coin. I love our fellowship here on this thread and that's one thing I really miss compared to local AA is not getting to see your smiling faces as you pick up your coins along your sober path. :H You are right Catch that the colored ones look like holiday chocolate coins!! Most of the ones given out where I go to meetings are the standard goldish color. Every once in awhile a colored coin will sneak in somehow. One day a guy got a purple coin for 6 months I think? At first he was all disappointed but then 1) realized he was being silly and 2) laughed when at least 3 of us approached him after the meeting offering to trade for the purple one. We are never happy, are we!

Bear, your post about fear resonates with me. Like Mary, I too realized through my 4th Step work exactly what a driving force fear has been in my life. Today I am pushing through things more often and certainly not allowing my fears to drive me to drink.

I've been busy and not on the boards but to some good meetings. Yesterdays open topic meeting was great once again. This is the one where last week we talked about humility and it was a very deep and "sober school" discussion. Gave me a lot to think about. This week, we talked in a similar fashion about pride, and how there is a good type of pride - i.e. that good feeling we get after we do the next right thing. But there is also pride run amok which is the version of the 7 deadly sins type. One woman spoke of our need to keep our pride "right sized" in the same way our humility should be "right sized." Some examples of pride gone bad that resonated with me were things like - not wanting to ask for help because I feel it will make me look stupid, or that I *should* already know whatever it is. (or be able to handle whatever it is all by myself) Other things that I wrote down that are sometimes an issue for me:

* Being a know it all
* Thinking I'm better than others (ANY others)
* Being secretive (not wanting anyone to know about my flaws)
* Inability to take compliments (this is perfectionism - thinking that I don't deserve a compliment because it's not perfect)

Good pride was discussed as having healthy self respect and healthy self esteem.

Step Coach suggested that the wrong kind of pride is isolating. i.e. when we think we are better or above others. And he reminded that AA is a "we" program not an "I" program. We need each other to stay sober and live a good life, and we can't do that if we isolate.

It was a good meeting! I've mentioned before a guy who comes who has some admitted mental problems. He even commented one day re: "How it Works" on the part where people with mental issues can recovery too if they have the capacity to be honest. He said he had mental problems but that he could be honest. He celebrated 10 months sober today. He has grown so much in this program and it's also clear that he is doing much much better medically now that he is sober. I'm sure the drinking and extra curricular drugs made it difficult for the doctors to get his other meds right.

I love watching recovery. I didn't really understand that when I first heard people around the tables saying it. But now I watch it and love it. I love *watching* all of your recoveries through cyber space too.

OK - zoom zoom! Strength and hope to all who need it today.

DG

[Winefree]

Weekly AA Thread - 5/3 - 5/9

Mary, THAT IS WONDERFUL NEWS! So happy to hear it. Our prayers were answered.

Catch, I missed what you said about your 3 month coin! I am so sorry. Huge congratulations. The 3 month coin is a milestone. Wait and see how the days keep adding up now to months and how much better you will feel. It truly is a blessing and miracle when we work for it.

DG, tired tonight since it was an early day for me, so I can't get deep into your last message. I will come back tomorrow and reflect on it.

Night to all.
Winefree

[retteacher]

Weekly AA Thread - 5/3 - 5/9

Everyone: I'm out of survival mode & back into progress mode now that my mind is a little clearer. I'm finding that the more honest & above board I am about everything, the more my fears are extinguished. It's a deeply ingrained habit for me to keep things to myself & not share them w/anyone...even my husband/children. I'm trying to come out & say: "I'm struggling w/(fill in the blank)." It can be something simple or deep.

I'll be going to my regular step meeting tonight. I'm really looking forward to it. I want to the steps to be a daily part of my life, & the more I understand them, the more I can use them. Mary