Weekly AA Thread - Week of June 21 - June 27

[retteacher]

Hi Everyone:

I just read the end of the last weekly thread. DG, you are going to have quite a time in San Antonio. It's a beautiful city...yes, hot in the summer. But, the convention will be awesome. Some AA friends from up here will be going. There's going to be a lot of spiritual energy in one place that week.

I too love that people are discovering my sobriety. When we go over to peoples' homes for dinner, they often have special soft drinks & juices just for me. My closest friends witnessed my last awful drinking debacle, but others just think I don't drink. I've often said (when I don't feel like sharing that I'm a recovering alcoholic) that I just "feel better" when I don't drink. I leave it at that.

Thanks for putting Patty of Sister's prayer list. Her surgery is June 28th at noon Eastern Time. It'll be about 4+ hours.

I'm watching the kids today but will try to be back tomorrow.

Mary

[Doggygirl]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of June 21 - June 27

Good morning and Mary, thanks for getting us started this week. Have fun watching the g-kids today. Does that include the dog? I can't imagine trying to watch kids AND dogs.

Dance, I will watch for jackrabbits! Everything is big in TX eh?

Gaia, someday you might be surprised at what you can look back and laugh at. I think that is part of the healing process eventually. I am at a point where I can laugh at some things that are part of my drinking past. Other things...not yet.

I like today's thought for the day about perspective:

A.A. Thought For The Day

Intelligent faith in that Power greater than ourselves can
be counted on to stabilize our emotions. It has an
incomparable capacity to help us look at life in balanced
perspective. We look up, around, and away from ourselves,
and we see that nine out of ten things that at the moment
upset us will shortly disappear. Problems solve themselves,
criticism and unkindness vanish as though they had never
been. Have I got the proper perspective toward life?

This reading makes me think of a Dalai Lama video clip I saw a couple of years ago. He was talking about perspective and how if we allow our own problems to completely fill our frame of view, they seem overwhelming. But if we step back and view our problems within a larger frame of life, they are "right sized" and we can see that they are NOT the only thing going on. I wish I could share the video clip which was much better than my meager attempt to explain it! It's one of those things that really stuck with me.

You all are my meeting today! I'll be leaving shortly to drive Dad to his follow up appointment at U of Chicago Hospital. To see his surgeon who according to the nurses there, is the only doctor they have ever seen change a bed pan.

DG

[Doggygirl]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of June 21 - June 27

Oh Mary, I forgot to say that I appreciated your comment about the spirituality that will be abounding I'm sure in S.A. When I read your comment to that effect, I thought about that big arena and am hoping they start the meeting with a quiet time followed by the serenity prayer. Gives me chills just thinking about it.

DG

[retteacher]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of June 21 - June 27

Just got back from the women's meeting I go to. It was on the third step...a perfect one for the struggle I'm experiencing today. My job is acceptance...specifically of the cancer & of all life's ups & downs. I wouldn't have chosen this for my daughter, but this is in our lives, & it must be dealt with. We have to see what lessons there are for us here. In my drinking days, I think I would have been railing against this situation. I would have only seen the negative though I still haven't seen the positives yet. I would have been looking for the moments when I could find a way out through drink. No, I have to face this w/courage, & I cannot do that if I'm drinking. End of story.

Tomorrow I have the day to myself. I'm going to try to do something for myself.

Mary

[Doggygirl]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of June 21 - June 27

Mary, taking a day to pamper yourself a bit sounds great. Seems like a good idea to recharge your own batteries so you can give 100% when your daughter needs you the most.

I mentioned on AF Daily as I ran out the door this afternoon that Step Coach is in the hospital. He came through so much radiation and chemo with flying colors and all his hair in tact. And now he is being dragged down by something the doctor said is "not pnemonia but similar." He is in a hospital so near and yet so far. I'm grateful I have the flexibility where I could just go see him. I got to meet his son who seems like a very wonderful young man. Step Coach quit drinking before he was born, so he was raised by sober parents but had much exposure to the AA / Alanon culture since his parents are so involved. Step Coach wanted to have an AA meeting (any two alcoholics...) so he kicked his son out briefly. :H I guess that was a closed meeting! I read from the 24-Hours and Daily Reflections books. Interesting that the readings dealt with fear. I'm sure Step Coach is feeling fear when he feels like he can't breath. He is being brave though. Still thinking of others. Still coaching me to reach out my hand to a newcomer. Still saying that nobody should ever give up before the miracle happens.

I hope recovers from this set back. I'm trying not to think ahead - just stay in today and be grateful for the friendship and mentoring he has shown me. I know I will have many opportunities to pay that kindness forward within AA and in life, and also towards his wife who will be very lost when he is gone.

Thanks for listening. I just felt like writing about that. I am grateful to be able to handle things like this with calm. (and of course, sober)

DG

[retteacher]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of June 21 - June 27

DG: What a lovely story about the meeting in the hospital room. Yes, these are the moments when we recovering alcoholics can be grateful for AA, as you would never have had the opportunity to be a calm & sober support to your S.C.

I just called a woman AA friend (23 years in program) who has not stopped reaching out to newcomers. It's so heart-warming to see.

Mary

[Doggygirl]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of June 21 - June 27

Hi Mary. When I talked to Sister this morning she wrote down Patty's surgery date. So Patty McGillicuddy (I still laugh about the large McGillicuddy family!) is again on the prayer list. 90 nuns must hold at least a little sway.

There was a lot of reflection at the meeting this morning related in various ways to Step Coach. A couple of the guys went to see him last night. He has helped so many and is an ever hopeful person. One of the readings was about getting upset over little things. (24-hours) We agreed that focusing on something outside of ourselves is a sure way to stop mentally knawing on stupid stuff.

I have been praying a lot lately "only for knowledge of God's will for me and the strength to carry that out." I had a bit of an epiphany on that subject while driving home. One of those "geeze that's been right under my nose all along" moments. I really have known many of the "right things to do" all along. It really IS my character defects that get in the way and block me from doing the right thing. Selfishness and fear are big things that block me. No wonder I need them removed on a regular basis. Mr. Doggy and I talked about that over dinner last night. I'm so glad I can talk to him about this stuff. I dont' always know that I am growing and changing but he says he can see it. He says he is learning things from me. Wow.

Anyway...just a bit of rambling. There was a guy at the meeting who shares my "day of the month" anniversary. I no longer really think about the days or months any more - just the years. When he saw me he said something about anniversaries. I said "huh?" Until I remembered that today IS the 22nd. So I am 25 months sober today. (He is 28 months)

DG

[retteacher]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of June 21 - June 27

DG: 25 months is quite an accomplishment. Many thanks for putting Patty on the prayer list. There have been studies that have proven that prayer works. Spiritual energy is very powerful. We're getting through this. I'm grateful that I'm feeling all the anguish & working through it. I'm able to go about my life in a fairly normal way. Yes, emotion wells up from time to time, but it's manageable. This is precisely the type of situation I would have drowned in alcohol, thus not learning any lessons from it & not being able to help very much.

A young guy (4 yrs sober) spoke last night. He was great & really emphasized working the 12 steps, getting a sponsor, & helping another alcoholic. Just going to meetings didn't work for him...he kept relapsing.

Mary

[Doggygirl]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of June 21 - June 27

I always love hearing from the younger people who have gotten sober. It just makes me happy for them that they got off the elevator to hell sooner rather than later.

Todays meeting was a discussion of todays 24-Hours a Day reading. For me, it was a powerful reading.

Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

Alcohol is our weakness. We suffer from mental conflicts
from which we look for escape by drowning our problems in
drink. We try through drink to push away from the realities
of life. But alcohol does not feed, alcohol does not build,
it only borrows from the future and it ultimately destroys.
We try to drown our feelings in order to escape life's
realities, little realizing or caring that in continued
drinking we are only multiplying our problems. Have I got
control over my unstable emotions?

Meditation For The Day

When I let personal piques and resentments interfere with
what I know to be my proper conduct, I am on the wrong track
and I am undoing all I have built up by doing the right
thing. I must never let personal piques interfere with
living the way I know God wants me to live. When I have no
clear guidance from God, I must go forward quietly along the
path of duty. The attitude of quiet faith will receive its
reward as surely as acting upon God's direct guidance. I must
not weaken my spiritual power by letting personal piques
upset me.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may not let myself become too upset. I pray that
I may go quietly along the path I have chosen.

I bolded the part that jumped out at me today. A little AL might have felt good in the "now" (the first couple of drinks) but I really thought about all that AL DID rob me of in my future and all that AL would have robbed me of had I followed through on my suicide desires. Even a hangover robbed me of things. In fact, hangovers robbed me of a LOT considering I had one every day. Fights with my husband, the inner conflict that went with all the selfish behavior, etc. etc. Even without a DUI or lost marriage over AL, its' still a lot of life to be robbed of when you add it all up.

No more.

Mary, I'm thinking of your daughter and your family today...

DG

[retteacher]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of June 21 - June 27

DG: Thanks so much for your concern. Yes, I did try to drown my feelings w/AL...that was its purpose to me. Now that I'm going through a lot of feelings w/Patty's cancer, I see I can do it. Each day I feel stronger...even when I'm crying. I have 3 meetings this weekend. I'll need them.

Mary

[Winefree]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of June 21 - June 27

Well wishes and hello to all. Away on vacation this week in AZ and not able to get on line as much as I usually can.
Mary thoughts and prayers continue as the surgery day approaches.
Sure hope Step coach gets well soon too.

Haven't gotten to any meetings since I left home. Using daily prayer to stay on track. Shopped in a local market today and they sell AL right in the regular market. They don't do that back home in CT. Had to rush through the bread isle and not look to the right in the butter and cheese isle in order to avoid AL. Sure glad is isn't sold like that all over.

Thanks to my higher power, I just kept walking past, saying Not Today. So glad it isn't as difficult now as it would have been a year ago. Time does heal.

Take care.

Winefree

[retteacher]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of June 21 - June 27

WF: I've had to do that...avert my eyes from an AL display in the supermarket. I visit my mom in FL, & they sell AL everywhere...even drugstores, Walmarts, etc. We don't have that here in Massachusetts, & I'm glad of it. I must admit that I think about AL very, very rarely. Once in a while, I'll see a cold glass of white wine & shiver a little, but mostly not.

Patty & I went out to dinner w/2 of my dearest friends (they are sisters) who both went through breast cancer surgery 4-5 years ago...double mastecotomies for both. They answered a lot of questions Patty had. It was emotional but again, I don't have to blunt my emotions. I can live through this.

I have my favorite meetings this weekend...that's a good thing right before the surgery on Mon.

I'll be back.

Mary

[Doggygirl]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of June 21 - June 27

They sell AL everywhere here too. Like all other situations, practice makes perfect. At first what I did was go to completely different stores to buy groceries and such so I wouldn't end up in the booze aisle out of habit.

Went to see step coach today. No more oxygen mask - he's got the tube where it goes right up your nose all the time now. I suspect he will have to have an oxygen tank with him some or all of the time once he's out of the hospital. But this must be more serious than it looks on the surface because the doc still expects he will be there another week. These days with insurance covering so little hospital time, they seem to want to boot people out the door immediately. His wife was there today and it was nice to spend time with her too. They are such wonderful people. We were talking about the upcoming convention in San Antonio. I guess Mrs. Step Coach was an Alanon speaker several years ago at the convention in Minnesota. Whatever part of the event she spoke at - it was in front of a couple thousand people. I can't imagine that! She got a letter months and months before the event asking if she would speak. She said yes and said she was nervous for SO LONG before it was finally over! She has a cassette tape of it somewhere and I told her I would love to hear it if she comes across it.

I am getting nervous about speaking at the little meeting on Sunday. I can't imagine speaking in front of that many people!

DG

[mama bear]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of June 21 - June 27

OMG Doggy...as strong and as inspirational as you are , and YOU are nervous!!!

[clare]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of June 21 - June 27

Doggygirl i follow your posts here and even i dont abstain yet,you do give me great hope that i to one day will be in control like you.Thank you