day 8 alcohol free and day 7 smoke free here.
I slept for 14 hours on Friday evening - combination of cold/flu starting and work stress I think.Maybe getting the crap out of my system too.
watched amazing roller derby yesterday dosed up with cold medication AND DIET 7UP!!
came home after and went to bed at midnight - missed after party as it would have been a boozy do.I did feel a pang but being sober/calm/not depressed/anxious is my goal.
Alcohol makes me anxious and depressed,and prevents me from developing proper skills in looking after myself.
I feel blue - like crying - bit ill - but I sure as hell would feel worse with a hangover/smokers lungs as well.
Put on half a pound this week - not listened to hypno tapes as much (without falling asleep) and only skated twice (not 4 times) and no gym or cycling.
BUT have been ill/exhausted - feels like I've caught up on sleep now - feel a bit tearful.
I confided in someone leaving team about probs I had with someone else in the team - now they may be coming back and I am worried they may break the confidence - no reason to think they're not trustworthy but I feel scared.
Been lots of team rucks recently and don't want anymore.
Anyway positives - am af and sf, am healthy, have a nice home, a relationship, a job that pays well (for now - best get saving in case!), two lovely cats,good old friends,nice new friends.On leave for a week in 3 weeks time.
good day all to come - bit rambly today and need to get stuff out of my head.
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