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AF August - Week 2

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    #61
    AF August - Week 2

    Lav - I'm so sorry about your news :l you know we are all here to support you or if you just need to vent, get it out your system by posting,

    When we get news we don't want to hear it affects us physically as well as mentally, I know I spent several days with an uncomfortable current searing through my body which is probably a form of shock. If it's any consolation this has now subsided and it's best to let the emotions settle before trying to dissect the situation. Once we are calmer we are better able to decide our next move. For now Lav give yourself some extra TLC.
    "In the depths of winter I finally learned there was in me an invincible summer ."
    AF - JAN 1st 2010
    NF - May 1996

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      #62
      AF August - Week 2

      Lav-I'm with Chill. Please be extra good to yourself because you are always taking care of others. We'll all be here for you because WE love you! :l:l:h:h

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        #63
        AF August - Week 2

        Thank you friends,
        I love all of you too
        This support really does help.

        Despite all his flaws, he is my husband & I really hate to see him go like this.
        He's justified his actions (in his mind) by leaving me financially intact. When the shock wears off a bit I will be able to feel grateful - just not today.
        He's convinced himself that I am responsible for making him feel.......inadequate. I will never take resposibility for doing that because it's not true. His self esteem problems were intact when I met him as a teenager. I hoped that with a lot of love & attention he would outgrow all that but he didn't. It only got worse as we aged, when he retired from his police job, when the kids moved on, etc.
        He is working a 'retirement job' & was thinking about leaving that at the end of the year. Now he's put himself into the position of having to stay until he dies. That's just all wrong I think.

        I'll shut up now - thank you again for your support.
        Lav
        AF since 03/26/09
        NF since 05/19/09
        Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

        Comment


          #64
          AF August - Week 2

          Hi guys
          I had a two hour meeting this morning with a really great friend, he is a very high flying business man from London so knows all about how it works with all the loans and borrowing my ex has made. He is 10 times more helpful than my Lawyer and is even prepared to mediate if i need him to. He says if I can get all the formal statements from the banks he will put together a proposal to my ex and if he agrees we can draw up with a lawyer but will save a lot of legal fees in the meantime. I know I have a long way to go to get through this mess but I feel so grateful to have friends like this, it's overwhelming...

          I have been trying for jobs in some local cafes but no luck so far, if I can just earn something to ease the pressure I would feel better. Anyway, it's Sunday and I'm going to lay by the pool and read my book, a friend is coming over later and I am making us fish pie for supper. He is on strict instructions to make me laugh and I know he will.....:H

          Lav - I hope you are doing ok, I know like me you cannot be enticed back to the bottle even when in crisis and that gives us much to stand tall for. Wishing everyone a peaceful and AF Sunday.
          "In the depths of winter I finally learned there was in me an invincible summer ."
          AF - JAN 1st 2010
          NF - May 1996

          Comment


            #65
            AF August - Week 2

            Hi friends,

            My mind is quite a bit quieter today - good!
            Didn't sleep much again last night but that's OK, sleep will come eventually.

            Think I'll go outside for a while before the rain comes

            Wishing everyone a terrific AF Sunday.
            Lav

            PS: Chill, the thought of drinking nowadays makes me feel sick - honestly.
            AF since 03/26/09
            NF since 05/19/09
            Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

            Comment


              #66
              AF August - Week 2

              Home now,
              Fortunately no one else is here. Terribly depressed to be here. My husband is out visiting his parents. My son and his fiance are in Santa Fe, will be here for dinner. Did I mention I don't like his fiance?? My loss. Drive was okay though met up with some really scary weather in Kansas, Wizard of Oz type weather.

              Lav, sorry things have turned out as they have. It's got to be a relief to know things are done.

              Chill, you are so positive. Make the best of everything. Your friends sound remarkable.

              Red, where did you buy the dress? I'm at a loss. At least I have LBH for advice. When is the wedding?

              Dill, I think of teaching 10 years ago and it feels like heaven. The standardized testing, the inability for a teacher to teach what she believes is the best curriculum, the disappearance of music and art, all of this makes teaching so hard these day (including SLP's in this). Good luck starting back. Hope you have a good principal.

              Rusty, again please, what exactly is your job. Event planning??

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                #67
                AF August - Week 2

                Hi August Friends,

                Lav-you sound better. Again, I'm so sorry....he is your husband and what you're going through is a terrible loss.:l

                Sped- sorry you're down today. Yes, you mentioned that you didn't like your son's fiancee but were vague as to why....well, you know him best, of course. I am sure there are good reasons why you don't care for her. (Maybe she'll change for the better). I'm glad you got home safely!

                Sped, no, I am not an event planner. I am a consultant/trainer in the automotive industry. I work for 2 companies as a contractor and then I have my own business, hence, the reason why I work as many hours as I do. I have to go to Indiana in March and April and I am hoping we can meet.

                Hello to Chill, Dill, Rustop, Sooty, Cyntree, Papmom, Paguy, and anyone else, happy Sunday!

                Back to work.....I've spent a couple hours running and then swimming in the pool and I have a class to teach tomorrow. I'll check in later!

                Comment


                  #68
                  AF August - Week 2

                  Glad you returned home safely Shelley!
                  Enjoy your 'quiet' time at home before the others return

                  I almost forgot - Chill wanted to see what a Bullwinkle the Moose embrodered cap looks like.
                  This is my ebay listing:

                  Bullwinkle the Moose embroidered cap - eBay (item 180547642348 end time Sep-14-10 13:16:31 PDT)

                  Rusty, you asked about another cartoon character - I have many, many cartoon designs. I'll let you know as soon as I go thru them to see if I have the one you asked about.

                  It's raining & boring so I'm in my shop playing catch up this afternoon!
                  AF since 03/26/09
                  NF since 05/19/09
                  Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

                  Comment


                    #69
                    AF August - Week 2

                    Cross post Rusty
                    AF since 03/26/09
                    NF since 05/19/09
                    Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

                    Comment


                      #70
                      AF August - Week 2

                      Hi Lav,

                      Cross post! Love the hat! It looks great! Most of my friends (and older ones, too) remember Bullwinkle.

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                        #71
                        AF August - Week 2

                        The hats are on e-bay?????? Oh gosh, Lav, I'll pay EXTRA for the one I want. :-)

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                          #72
                          AF August - Week 2

                          Lav-You have Rocky the Flying Squirrel, too?! OOOHHH...I feel like I'm 5 again, except I'm sober! hhahahahahah (just kiddin')

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                            #73
                            AF August - Week 2

                            Good afternoon. Lav, sorry to hear about your husband's decision, but I agree with the comment about getting it in writing regarding the financial agreement. Most women end up with money issues after the end of a marriage. I know you will take care of yourself. It will take time to get used to the finality of it. I always hate when people blame others for their feelings, problems, etc. You have taken total responsibility for your sobriety and your life AF, a real accomplishment and a help to so many of us.

                            Sped, the wedding is September 3rd, a Friday night. I kind of waited till the last minute, I know. I went to a local department store and the dresses are all on sale, end of summer. I just lucked out. I was told by a friend to pick out numerous dresses and try them all on. I did at the first store I went to, tried on about 20 dresses, and none were what I wanted. But, it gave me an idea of what I might like, so when I went to the second store, I had a better idea of what looked good on me and what I might want, including colors. I also was kind of scared as the selection was small. But if your wedding is in October, you might need a warmer type dress, but maybe not. You live in the desert? So it will still be beautiful weather. Good luck and have a good time shopping.

                            I read a great book, The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz, and it was interesting. It was an easy read, spiritual and a new way to look at and interact in your life. I may reread it tonight.

                            It cooled off a little here, so I am going to try and take a walk later. Have a good evening.
                            Formerly known as redhibiscus

                            Comment


                              #74
                              AF August - Week 2

                              A very late check in for me, but it's been a very busy and fun day. We got up and out early for some time on the boat. I managed to finish my book, The Lilac Bus and it was such a good book that I had that let down feeling you get when you are finished with a book and you still want to read more somehow. Red, the Dublin 4 was even better than the Lilac Bus, IMO. The last story about the man getting out of rehab and returning to his life and marriage was very well written indeed.
                              Rustop, these stories take place in Dublin. Have you read any of Maeve Binchy's books?
                              Chill, good for you getting extra help working through the paperwork and details. I'd need help with that for sure.
                              Lav, I am sorry things have gone so far in the wrong direction for you. At least you are no longer dealing with uncertainty and you can take action to protect yourself and move forward with your life.
                              Rusty, I was a huge fan of Rocky and Bullwinkle, too! I loved the "Fractured Fairy Tales" and Peabody and Sherman. What a great show. But, hey, aren't you too young to have watched that? That was 1959-64. You weren't even born yet!!!:H
                              Sped, I work in 4 different settings. One is a school where I work with preschoolers and junior high/high schoolesr. Another is a preschool set in an assisted living/elder care facility so there is opportunity for inter-generation interactions. Another is a traditional Head Start classroom. I don't have a whole lot of contact with the principal in my one school, and it's good because he is kind of a clueless type. And, I feel sorry for you that you don't like your son's fiance. I live that reality myself. I don't like my son's wife. Not a d**m thing I can do about it but stuff it and get on with things. His wedding day was really one of the saddest days of my life.
                              LBH, Sooty, Cyn, Rebirth and all who stop in, have a peaceful AF evening.
                              Dill

                              Dont forget, you can: start late, start over, be unsure, try and fail AND STILL SUCCEED!

                              If it is important to you, you will find a way. If not, you will find an excuse.

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                                #75
                                AF August - Week 2

                                Red(Star) - glad you found the perfect dress

                                Rusty, I think all of us in our 50's & 60's have fond memories of Rocky & Bullwinkle! I can remember sitting on the floor in front of the black & white TV & being just glued to that show. No wonder I turned out so intelligent being schooled on Moose Philosophy at such a young age :H:H

                                I went thru my CDs with cartoon character designs - no Dilbert. But I do have a bunch of Garfield designs - that other bossy cat!! I did a quick online search & couldn't find anyone selling Dilbert designs (not even an illegal copy). I haven't been able to get any Warner Brother character design either. If they ever do release licenses I'll be sure to scoop them up.

                                Hope I can find something good on TV tonight - Masterpiece Theater comes to mind
                                AF since 03/26/09
                                NF since 05/19/09
                                Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

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