AF Daily Saturday 8/14

[greeneyes]

Abberooooos!

Everybody must be off and running with their busy AF lives already!

I've walked the dam and heading out in a minute for the pool party thing. I was thinking about one of the telecasts I listened to and the person was talking about starting the day with ME. Spelled MEE actually. It stood for meditate, eat, exercise. I think it was Victoria Moran author of Living a Charmed Life, among other things. She starts the day by thinking of 10 things to be grateful for which wards off that busy brain stuff before it starts going. She lights a candle on the bedside table to remind her when coming back from bathroom to sit and meditate and plan the day. The exercise is about getting the body moving in the AM in a wy that makes you happy and eating is about really healthful eating to noruish. She mentioned a cookbook - Raw Food Made Easy for 1 or 2 People. She also wrote Younger by the Day. That telecast was a well-spent hour.

Zooming off for a day full of happy AFness!! Have a fabbie one!

Here's the link for the replay if you're interested. It expires tonight. Victoria Moran @ Inner Healing Compass

[momof3]

AF Daily Saturday 8/14

Hey Greenie Beanie and all to come.

I love the MEE morning ritual and writing down 10 things that you are grateful for. I find myself waking up thinking about all I have to "do." Instead of just "being." This is why I find exercising first thing so helpful because it allows me to be and do at the same time and it gets me out of my head and quiets me down.

Had a nice time at the Shenandoah Mountains. We went tubing down the Shenandoah River one day. It was a 4.5 hour trip so it was a little long. And, half way through, the heavens opened and it rained like crazy. It was coming down so hard that it hurt. Fortunately it did not last long. My youngest was crying, "I want to go home."

Went to Luray Caverns on Thursday and had a special bonus of seing Michelle Obama and her daughter Sasha. She has such a quiet strength about her.

Have been catching up on the threads since I returned. Lots going on.

One thing I forgot to mention. I can go away on vacations now and not think about Al at all. Vacations used to be so connected with Al but no more. That association is gone. Nice.

[Doggygirl]

AF Daily Saturday 8/14

Hi all! Greenie thanks for getting us started today. I appreciate your suggestions from the seminar you listened to. I love the idea of adding a reflection of 10 things I'm grateful for to the morning routine. I have been a little hit and miss lately with the prayers and meditations. My mind tends to race like crazy and I really need to get consistent again with getting "centered" before blasting off for the day!

M3, your trip to the mountains sounds wonderful. (all except the part about painful rain!) I like how we develop new habits after doing things enough times sober. The thought of "vacation" still brings some AL thoughts (not urges, just thoughts) into the picture, which tells me I need to get busy and take more vacations! :H

Already been to AA, Curves and Farmers Market. Canning some tomatoes is next. I swear this is the last batch for canning. Got some peaches (big ones that are not scratch 'n' dent!) at the farmers market. I think they will be best for the jamarama after a couple of days in the window. I want 'em really really ripe.

A friend of mine cares for her elderly mother. Her mother recently had kidney failure. She is back home now but my friend needs to stay really close to home base until they settle into a new routine. So I was thinking I will call her and see if she'd like some company later. That is stepping out of the box for me.

I am very grateful to be sober today. It feels magical. One thing is for sure.....I won't break the spell by drinking today!

DG

[papmom3]

AF Daily Saturday 8/14

good morning everyone!! I'm at work and it's maddenly slooooowwwww.
I have a lot of work to do for my other job and was looking forward to getting it done today but of course one of our brokers left a nice mailing project for me. I don't know why I don't learn after 2 years that his mailings and my immiment deadline always coincide??!!!
got up and took LM for a walk around the neighborhood this morning and we didn't see one other dog (whew!!). Looks like I'll be alternating dogs with walks from now on. It's the only way I'm going to get my exercise and get them their exercise with the least amount of guilt that I lay on myself. One walk every other day is better than none I guess.

Mom3-so glad you had such good time in the Smokies. Sorry you got caught in that nasty rainstorm in the middle of the river. What doesn't kill you .....right? What a treat to see the First Lady and her daughter!! I'm betting there was no conversation with her? Still, close up was nice.

Greenie-hope you're having a good time at the pool party!! Thanks for the link to the telecast. If I get the mailing done I'll try to listen to it before I leave.

Hi to all the other Ab Fabbers!! Where are you???
:l

[papmom3]

AF Daily Saturday 8/14

DG-Cross Post!!

[papmom3]

AF Daily Saturday 8/14

Sandwich Post (or maybe just a snack)

DG-I think your friend would really appreciate the company-you might be surprised where this act of kindness leads!!

Greenie-if I lit a candle and then went into the bathroom, I'm sure the next thing I would be doing is dialing 911 as I herd all the animals outside to safety!! Hope I have time to put clothes on!! :H

Labor Day weekend is coming up fast and so is my first really big test. My sis always has a big blowout pool/party BBQ and it is usually a huge drink fest that goes well into the night. I know she had a party for my neph's graduation in May that included a lot of the same people and drinks were readily available, but because it was supposed to be for the kids, it had a different vibe to it and I didn't feel too out of place. Plus the rose hadn't faded on my newfound Sobriety. This LD party, tho, this is a different animal. I have ALWAYS gotten totally shitfaced and then driven home. Yep. Why god was looking out for all the other people on the road every year is beyond me. How I didn't kill myself, someone else or at the very least get stopped for DUI is nothing short of a miracle. Plus I'm over the 3 month mark and I know a lot of times complacency sets in around now.
Well,..... This year I've decided to not be around for this party. I haven't told my sister yet and I'm a bit afraid to BUT, the fact is it will be a huge trigger for me, number one and number two if I'm completely honest about it, none of the people who come are my friends. Sure, I grew up with them and at one point or another hung out drinking with them, but they are all either my sister's or my brother's friends. They all are married (except for the one obnoxious drunk that comes every year - no I'm not talking about me :H ) and they ALL have kids, even the obnoxious drunk. I really have absolutely nothing in common with these people and I think the only way I could tolerate the party was to get shitefaced-that way it didn't matter that I had nothing to say to them. OK, it was also a great excuse to get shitefaced :H. So..... my friend with the border collies and paps and I are going down to a sheepherding trial in CT on Sunday that will culminate with a lobster/steak/clambake. I'm sure there will be drinking but my friend rarely has a drink and I won't know any of these people so they won't know my history plus I know I'll be driving. The next day, Monday we'll be going back down there for the Woodstock County Fair and a horse show. I really could care less about the horse show but I've never been to this fair and I love these things.
I feel pretty comfortable about this plan except for what I will tell my sister (I'll miss out on seeing my bro and his family but we're getting together next week at their house anyway) but if anyone see's anything I'm missing or glaring holes, please let me know!!

[paguy]

AF Daily Saturday 8/14

Good Morning everyone and welcome back from vacation, M3...

Greenie - I really like the philosophy of the MEE program. I am pretty good with the eating (healthy) and exercise part but have never tried meditation. I've always thought that my mind just races along way too fast to be able to learn how to block out all the inside chatter that goes on and relax enough to be able to meditate! I need to give this a try.

I am hoping to get to the gym today for the first time in 5 weeks since my foot surgery. Plan to take it easy but need to get back into the routine. I see my orthopedic doc again on Tuesday so I am hoping to get a good report.

Hope you all have a fabulous AF Saturday!

[paguy]

AF Daily Saturday 8/14

BTW - a BIG Thank You to all of you for your greetings and words of encouragement this week when I reached my 30 day AF milestone - it's an AWESOME feeling. You gals and guys are the best!

[Doggygirl]

AF Daily Saturday 8/14

PAGuy, take it easy at the gym, OK? I know what you mean about the constant chatter in the head. Me too. I was actually wondering the other day if ALL human kind chatters away in the head like that. All my alkie friends I've talked with about this seem to have a committee in there that never sleeps. Working to quiet that down sometimes is very refreshing. For me, I often think of prayer as giving the chatterers in my head a grown up to talk to. :H

papmom3;934264 wrote: DG-I think your friend would really appreciate the company-you might be surprised where this act of kindness leads!!

I called her. Will probably be going to visit her tomorrow afternoon. She said 'bring your suit and we'll get in the pool.' So that call led to a potentially nice place especially in this heat! She's a nice woman and I look forward to getting to know her better.


I feel pretty comfortable about this plan except for what I will tell my sister (I'll miss out on seeing my bro and his family but we're getting together next week at their house anyway) but if anyone see's anything I'm missing or glaring holes, please let me know!!

I think that is an awesome plan. I just can't ever see myself having any fun at a party like that where drinking is such a big focus AND I really don't have much in common with anyone. That would be torture. I want to go with you on your trip. That sounds like fun!!!

As far as your sister.... Is the truth a possibility? I have told quite a few people (including all of my family) that I stopped drinking because it became a real problem for me. 1) they sorta knew that anyway so there was a bit of relief in it for them and 2) I don't ever have to worry about making stuff up. There was a time when I would NOT have seen the truth as the simplest and easiest option, but faced with your situation today, that's exactly how I would want to handle it if possible. (I of course don't know your relationship with your sister...)

At some point I think the people closest to us need to know we're not drinking, and it's OK for them to know we don't particularly enjoy wild drunken parties. I know it feels weird at fist.

I AM NOT A BAD PERSON TRYING TO GET GOOD. I AM A SICK PERSON TRYING TO GET WELL.

That is all.

6 quarts of tomatoes canned. I'm officially done with tomatoes for the season!

DG

[papmom3]

AF Daily Saturday 8/14

Hey PAguy-yes, please take it easy at the gym. As an ex-athletic trainer I can't tell you how many times my athletes reinjured themselves because they got the green light and thought they could take up where they left off. Just saying.

DG-My sis does know I don't drink anymore and why. What I'm afraid of is hurting her feelings by saying I'd rather be somewhere else than at her party that I've attended every year for the past 16 years (and before that at the Memorial Day parties we put on at my parents house while they were sailing!!). I think she would understand the part about the party being a big trigger for me but she would not, at all, understand why it wouldn't and hasn't been any fun for me (maybe earlier it was when we were all younger, not married, there were no kids AND there was still the possibility of "hooking up"). Anyway, I'll figure it out somehow. Glad to know you think the plan itself is good. Hey, you want to come on out here, you absolutely can come with us to the trials and the fair. You want lobster or steak???

:l

[Lavande]

AF Daily Saturday 8/14

Afternoon Abbers!

How does it go Greenie?
The universe doesn't give you what you want but what you need?

I want to be loved & accepted but what I'm getting is dollars & cents!

I've received the answers from Mr Lav.
1. He has no intention of reconiliation
2. He is ready to hand me the house
3. He is ready to hand me his entire pension (which now covers all the household bills)
4. He wants to be friends, handyman, yardboy, stay in touch with the family
5 He will not consider changing his thinking in anyway, shape or form.

I have to learn to be grateful for this...........somehow!

Wishing peace & love to all of you today & everyday!

[Rusty]

AF Daily Saturday 8/14

Hi Lav,

I posted under the AF August post. I am heartbroken that you want to be loved and accepted by Mr. Lav and he is incapable of doing so. Not your fault....his chronic depression and self-absorbed persona makes him incapable of doing so, I would imagine. Wishing you peace and love as well, today!

xoxoxo

Rusty

[Doggygirl]

AF Daily Saturday 8/14

papmom3;934383 wrote: You want lobster or steak???

:l

BOTH!!!

Re: your sis... She may NOT fully understand or fully like what you need to do for YOU but that's OK. I'm guessing in the big picture she will accept it. Maybe you could talk with her about doing something special just the two of you since the Big Party really doesn't work for you right now. Would that help her to know you care about HER even though you are not really interested in the party?

Lav, I am so sorry to hear that you did not get what you had hoped for in your conversation with Mr. Lav and in your marriage, really. You must feel so devastated after so many years and now this. If he really is dead set on leaving permanently, I think there might be a few positives here but how 'bout we hold off on that until tomorrow? For today...just :l:l:l Do you have EB or a loved one with you tonight?

I noted on the AA thread about finding my extensive collection of "quit drinking without AA" books today. :H THAT was a walk down memory lane!

USA Gymnastics championships on Year-Round Coverage of Olympic Sports & Athletes | Universal Sports tonight. I can't wait!

One thing is for sure....

DG

[Guitarista]

AF Daily Saturday 8/14

Hey folk's!

Papmom, can i come too? (Lobster AND steak for me too please. The trade off being i play you song's from my new album. The guest's will either laugh or cry!)

I would add re your family/sister's party, don't forget......we must be ruthless with our sobriety to beat this. We really must be. And if that mean's not attending family/social event's, then do it. You'll be strong enough to attend these thing's when you are indeed stronger, and maybe further along your personal af path. How we explain this to people is up to us, but in my experience, if we don't put our sobriety and health, absolutely number one, we put ourselves at risk. Either way, hope you're having a great weekend.

A safe, sober, magical weekend to all!

[Doggygirl]

AF Daily Saturday 8/14

G. Where is the music you promised??????

DG