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AF daily - friday 20th

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    #16
    AF daily - friday 20th

    Great stuff Rusty! Do you stretch after your run's?

    Ah DG, you're an absolute GEM!

    'I am part of all that I have met, yet all experience is an arch wherethro', gleams that untravelled world whose margins fade, forever and forever when I move'

    Zen soul Warrior. Freedom today-

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      #17
      AF daily - friday 20th

      Hi guys,

      Okay - I'm obviously behind in something - LV you have on your signature about MA? Cowgal? We lost her? OMG - I remember when she was in the hospital and they thought they were going to lose her but she had recovered and was back on here. What happened - I missed that. So sad.

      Still good here - great lecture this morning on how the alcoholics brain works and how this is a genetic brain disease that is active when you are sober - that is when the disease is at it's strongest - which is why we have to work so hard to stay sober. It was quite illuminating - I wish I could get a video of the lecture cause it caused all of us to just go WOW.

      Have an AA meeting tonight and tomorrow morning. I am finding that I actually like AA now. I like the fellowship. I was dead set against it before but you know what? If it can help me stay sober, I'm all for it.

      Hope you guys have a great night!

      One thing is for sure!!!!!!:h
      Every day is a day to start over and remember that I am powerless over my addiction. I will no longer give the BEAST any power over me - he can go straight to hell.
      :h

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        #18
        AF daily - friday 20th

        An interesting webcast interview with Jennifer McLean..... replay for another day or so.

        Jennifer McLean @ The Aware Show

        Big squeezie hugs to everyone!
        sigpic
        Thoughts become things..... choose the good ones. ~TUT

        Comment


          #19
          AF daily - friday 20th

          Hello AF Daily Friends,

          Lav-is it quiet at your house now that the "Insanity Twins" are gone. The silence must be deafening.

          Hippy-I loved your post-very insightful.

          Greenie-I would love you to have my plumber. He is reliable, reasonable and nice.

          Mr.G-Yes, I do stretch after my runs.

          Uni-I'm so proud of your attitude and I am glad you have found fellowship at the AA meetings.

          Doggy-Go to Alaska on that cruise! The time to go is when you have a friend to go with. I know a couple of people who have gone and have loved it.

          Jodie-your words, "I am so grateful that I am not the lonely, depressed, isolated alcoholic that I used to be. I'm still and alkie, but a happy one in remission." So true for me when my drinking was at its worst about 2 years ago. I cried all the time-I would sit there and ruminate about things that happened years ago, and then I would drunk dial my sister-figuring, "oh, she won't know that I've drinking!" LOL.

          I am really comfortable entertaining and going out to dinner at the private club that I belong to and not drinking. One reason is, my sister doesn't drink and she is married to a wonderful, self-made man and they entertain A LOT, and it doesn't bother her or her friends, or ANYONE that she doesn't drink. At this club I belong to, there is a very attractive, very wealthy couple who are in their early 60's but look like they are in their 40's. They don't drink. They are very athletic and I asked the husband why they didn't, out of curiosity, mostly. He said to me, "why would we drink when it is absolutely the WORST thing you can do to your body. We like living!" So this fact gives me a lot of unsolicited support, and I'm glad. :-)

          I've had a wonderful day today....spent it with a friend and the little boy she adopted after being a foster mother to him for almost 4 years.

          A cheery hello to LV, Papmom, M3, Gaia, Bear, Raven, and anyone I've missed.

          Thanks for listening everyone, I really appreciate it. Time to curl up with my Friday night smut indulgences: People and US magazines (much to my mother's dismay).

          Comment


            #20
            AF daily - friday 20th

            G are you gigging this weekend?

            Uni - so wonderful to read your post. I was thinking as I was reading about that lecture "I wish I could hear that!" Sounds very interesting. When I was at the big AA event in San Antonio I really enjoyed going to the meetings where doctors and psychiatrists and social workers spoke. I too was DEAD SET AGAINST AA and swore I would never go. Now I love the fellowship too and like you - am just willing to do whatever it takes. There are far worse things in life than making a lot of new sober friends. It sounds like you are of a mind to make the most of this rehab opportunity and I applaud you for that!

            Rusty, I think we get so paranoid about what people will think if we say we don't drink. It really is silly as there are many people who don't drink and there are all kinds of different reasons for that, as you pointed out. One of my brothers doesn't drink for mainly religious reasons. He doesn't spend one second worrying what anyone might think because he doesn't drink. He doesn't explain why he doesn't drink AL. He just orders a diet coke and that's that. I think part of what creates issues is when we meet up with hard core drinking buddies who don't want to lose their hard core drinking buddies. I know I didn't like losing mine "back when." Surrounding myself with heavy drinkers allowed me to believe "I wasn't that bad." If anyone left the group, I was not thinking of them I was thinking of me.

            Greenie I need to figure out who Jennifer is. You post the most interesting links!

            Just got home from volunteer work at the mission serving dinner. Another lady was there about our age (29) with her daughter who is a junior in high school. I'm sure the daughter was mortified as the mother kept talking about her like she wasn't there. "I think it's so good for my daughter to volunteer.... My daughter this..... My daughter that....." At one point I just whispered to the daughter "some day you will just really appreciate how much she obviously loves you!! It was a fun evening there. I'm figuring out that the profile of non-guests who come during the open times for meals is very different from lunch to dinner. More women at lunch time and many of them with quite an attitude. (and it ain't gratitude) Dinner is mainly men and they just seem much calmer and more polite. Interesting.... The men and women and kids who are guests at the mission are all polite because that's the rules. These are tough love programs for sure. :b&d: But they are changing lives and that is a wonderful thing. Can you imagine being homeless and hopeless, and a few years later owning your own home and having a decent job, etc.

            Anyway...I'm cooking green beans for dinner along with a heat up of vegetable medley from last night. All except the mushrooms, which were farmers market, are from my garden.

            Nighty night all. Another wonderful AF day comes to a close.

            DG
            Sobriety Date = 5/22/08
            Nicotine Free Date = 2/27/07


            One day at a time.

            Comment


              #21
              AF daily - friday 20th

              Morning all.

              I have often thought about filling in my spare time (of which I have heaps) with doing some volunteer work. At the gym I go to we do a Christmas appeal for presents and a winter appeal for tinned foods for a womens shelter. I might look at whether they need volunteers, which I am sure they do.
              I once did volunteering at a AID and HIV patient clinic, it was a hospice for the terminal cases. The company who set it up offered alot of help and councilling to their volunteers so when people died, the volunteers could be debriefed and councilled if they needed it. However when one guy died that I was looking after the night before, I somehow got missed when they were debriefing the volunteers and I only found out a few days later when I rang for my next shifts. It really shook me and rather than seeking help I just quit. I have never really thought about how much that guy dying affected me but I have always been hesitant to volunteer again. So maybe now I have made the connection, I can offer my help again.
              That's what I love (and am grateful for Guitarista) about this site. I can read other peoples posts and see how it relates to me. Which is what I have done when volunteering was mentioned. I never thought about how that lovely man (although he was a stranger to me) dying affected me but now I do.
              Hope everyone has a great night/day wherever you are.
              Hipster
              I finally got it!
              "All that we are is the result of what we have thought. The mind is everything. What we think, we become" Buddah

              Comment


                #22
                AF daily - friday 20th

                Still Friday night here for me HC!

                Rusty, yes I am enjoying the peace & quiet..........the Insanity Twins have gone home
                I find it WAY easier to watch my 21 month old grandson for a few day than to watch those dogs - geez!

                I loved traveling with my daughter G because she had good French speaking skills back then. I remember her winning an argument in a post office in Paris with a rather snotty postal worker on our first trip. Made me proud

                I hope everyone has a peaceful night - I know I will

                Lav
                AF since 03/26/09
                NF since 05/19/09
                Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

                Comment


                  #23
                  AF daily - friday 20th

                  Hi everyone!!
                  What a great day off I had!! We had a local Papillon Specialty (conformation dog show)-paps and their handlers from all over the Northeast and some points elsewhere, came to show off their gorgeous dogs. The dog who took BOB (best of breed=best of show) was a very nice surprise especially since she/he was up against a dog being handled by the guy who showed Kirby(papillon) at Westminster in 1999 and won the whole thing. His dog today was to die for but the judge thought differently. Anyway, along with exciting times in the ring, my club who puts on this speicialty, also held a "yard sale", a silent auction and a live auction. I was the high bidder on a gorgeous denim jacket with beautifully embroidered butterflies with matching buttons. It was funny because 2 of my friends owned the jacket before donating it to the auction. Still in pristine shape and i can't wait to wear it at the October playdate. I also spent way to much at the yard sale. Denim butterfly skirt that I will have to lose 10 lbs to wear (motivation!!), cute green butterfly t-shirt, butterfly dishtowels, a pink butterfly ring and a beautiful gold and pearl butterfly necklace (are ya seeing a theme here?) as well as 2 papillon xmas ornaments. Whew!! Probably should flog myself for spending so much money but it was so much fun and goes to a good cause. I also had a lot of fun meeting new people and learning more about conformation. I drove up with my nurse friend and I talked more about my alcoholism. She knew I had stopped drinking but until now hadn't realized the extent of my problem. She's the one i'm going to the sheepherding trials with on Labor Day weekend. On the way to the show I stopped at the university my nephew will be attending starting Sunday, to pick up a pair of flip flops (university logo) for his care package. What a nice campus!! It's in one of the worst parts of my city but once inside the gates its gorgeous! The bookstore I went to for the flip flops is down the street and I was happy to see a really nice locally owned Java Shop, upscale (for that area) luncheonette and a gift shop. I can breath easier now!! This university is very well known in the Northeast, a great school and has a huge international population. My neph will love it!!
                  Tomorrow the family heads out to the western part of the state for my other nephew's 5th birthday party. The weather is supposed to be gorgeous-sunny and in the 70's. Might get cool towards evening, might have to bring my new jacket!!
                  Sunday is a day off. Got to try to get the new grill put together so I can start cooking some healthy meals.

                  Hipster-hope your girl is feeling much better. Way to go with finally putting some closure to your volunteering effort that ended badly a few years ago. Sounds like you're ready to try again.

                  DG-you really inspire us to be the best we can. I haven't been very giving lately in my life-been very selfish as I plod along in recovery. I can feel that the time is nearing to reach out and help some other living beings if I can.

                  Hi to Jodie, Greenie, Lav (goldenless Lav!!), Chill, G, Rusty and all who come by tonite. Hipster, have a great day while we sleep!!
                  Nite all, see you in the AM.
                  :l
                  New Birthday: May 8, 2010

                  "Because dwelling from, not upon, the space you want to inherit is the fastest way to change absolutely everything."[/i]-The Universe

                  KO the Beast!!

                  Comment


                    #24
                    AF daily - friday 20th

                    Hippy, I your post brought tears to my eyes because I believe it takes a very very special person to do hospice work and "be there" in such an important way for the terminally ill. One of my friends lost her husband to cancer when he was only in his 50's. To this day she talks about her gratitude to the hospice workers that helped him so much and also HER so much. What a beautiful but emotionally demanding type of work to do. I can certainly understand how easily something could happen that might drain you of your energy for it. How wonderful that you are AF today and can reflect back on that situation and figure out what it means for you going forward. I know I was just incapable of dealing with any deep emotions or emotional growth when I was drinking.

                    Lav, I smiled when I read the IT's are gone home. I'm not crazy about my OWN dogs when they are crazy like that. I definitely would not want to babysit somebody else's crazy ones! How cool about your DD and the post office argument in French. The French language is so beautiful to listen to. Do you ever ask her to speak French just so you can listen? Do you speak some French?

                    P3, I smiled through your whole post!! You are growing so much in your sober life. Getting out there and grabbing what all life has to offer. Revel in this time that is for YOU - building your energy and getting ready for whatever the Universe has in store for you tomorrow. Your jacket sounds fabulous! :h And all your new butterfly things! For a good cause! :yougo:

                    I had to smile when reading about the conformation show and the handler drama. Mr. Doggy does the sport side now but with our first Shepherd we somehow ended up with a very nice conformation dog and got involved in all that. I couldn't believe all the politikin over handlers and blah blah blah. Being the rebel that I am, we used to have a 10 year old girl handle our dog quite often. The breeder had a fit. "you're giving away this class!" Boo hoo. Kimba still won so many trophies anyway and it was fun to let a young girl who LOVED the dogs and had a good natural instinct for handling get some great experience. I enjoy watching the sport work a lot more. Less politikin'. Mr. Doggy's training group is having a mock trial on Labor Day weekend. Then they will have 2 more days of training to focus on weak areas. Our trainer's home club is hosting a trial this fall and Mr. D is hoping to finally get his Schutzhund 1 with his older dog.

                    Anyway...there's a lot of ramble! I have so much extra time now that my hair is completely dried and styled and tiffin' in 10 minutes or less.

                    Goind to see if todays thread is under way!

                    DG
                    Sobriety Date = 5/22/08
                    Nicotine Free Date = 2/27/07


                    One day at a time.

                    Comment


                      #25
                      AF daily - friday 20th

                      Yep DG-no politikn in the performance events that's for sure! You either run clean or you don't!! Doesn't matter if your dog is number one in the country. If he/she misses a jump or goes off course, knocks a bar down, they lose and the country bumpkin dog who's entered it's first trial wins. Not as easy or simple as that of course but the judging is so much more objective.
                      Funny you should mention Schutzhund training. A number of my pap friends started out with GSD and Schutzhund. Hmmmm. Maybe a pap is in your future!!
                      The Retail therapy sure was a lot of fun!! Someday I hope our club can actually raise funds for rescue but right now the "good cause" is them which sounds shallow but as you know, without breed clubs, the lines go out the window and the dogs being bred don't keep to the standard. At least our pap playgroup does raise funds every year for rescue and many of those members are also active in conformation and the breed club so the circle is complete.
                      Any hoo, thanks for the kudos. I'm really enjoying reading all the books recommended, checking out the meditation sites, reading your postings from Hazelton and the BB. I haven't checked out Greenies telecast or webcast links yet but on my list. I'm definitely looking at myself and the world around me a little differently and DEFO feeling calmer most of the time.
                      I am not at all concerned with the party today. One, because my sis doesn't want to stay long as she needs to get last minute packing done for my neph's move in day tomorrow (geesh, you'd think he was going to college cross country, not 20 min away!!) and 2, what Rusty said last nite about some of the people in her private club who do not drink at all. The lite bulb went off and today I don't feel like I will need to make any excuses (not that anyone will even comment) or feel like I am missing out on something. I'm not!! How about that!!
                      Time to get the pack harnessed up and out to the rail trail (except for LM unfortunately-I'm not ready to give away my peace and quiet this morning). Will check in on today's thread tonite.
                      :l
                      New Birthday: May 8, 2010

                      "Because dwelling from, not upon, the space you want to inherit is the fastest way to change absolutely everything."[/i]-The Universe

                      KO the Beast!!

                      Comment


                        #26
                        AF daily - friday 20th

                        Yes!!! A Pap in my future!!! :h

                        DG
                        Sobriety Date = 5/22/08
                        Nicotine Free Date = 2/27/07


                        One day at a time.

                        Comment


                          #27
                          AF daily - friday 20th

                          Thanks for the welcome DG and nice to ready all your doings all! As I am new, tell me; is a new AF thread started daily, for the hellos, catch ups and inspirations? Oh - I've noted some long time af - such as you DG, and it didn't get going for a while after you joined on. That's good as I've been trying a while and I do want that and plan to get there. I'm working on my mind accepting the moderation thing just doesn't work for me... back to sleep a bit more, early here in the midwest.
                          From the Sanskrit prayer;

                          "....For yesterday is but a dream, and tomorrow is only a vision,
                          But today well lived makes every yesterday a dream of happiness and every tomorrow a dream of hope."


                          :catroll:
                          determined to be AF

                          Comment


                            #28
                            AF daily - friday 20th

                            Hi again babysteps! Yes, there is a new "AF Daily" thread each day for hello and catch ups and support. I just started the one for today!

                            Yes I didn't "get it" right away. I started with all the MWO stuff except the Topomax. I did well and stay AF for 60 days. Then I drank. I guess I thought I could moderate. Or that's what I told myself even though deep down I knew better. It then took me EIGHT MONTHS to wrap my brain around sobriety again. That was a miserable 8 months. I knew it was a mistake to drink, but I just couldn't stop. It scares me to think about ever being in that place again.

                            I got sober again somehow but still had that nagging fear of relapse. I was afraid it would just sneak up on me and I'd drink and then wouldn't be able to stop again. I started going to AA and that has helped me take my sobriety to another level. (it's not for everyone - just saying what helped me personally). I am peaceful and contented in my sobriety today and for that I am grateful. It is SO worth it to keep working at it until you get there. I look forward to getting to know you better.

                            DG
                            Sobriety Date = 5/22/08
                            Nicotine Free Date = 2/27/07


                            One day at a time.

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