AF AUGUST - WEEK 5

[Chillgirl]

Good Morning Everyone
I thought I'd start week 5 as I think we could all so with a fresh start...

Rusty - Hows that knee doing?

Papmom - I hope you successfully beat the blues yesterday, as a fellow dog freak whenever I get down I focus on how much i love my darlin dog and how much pleasure she gives me, it cant help but make me smile.

Lav - New chicks coming, how lovely! Photos please....

Sped - I hope your 23 mile run went well, thats a hell of a distance! Hopefully the endorphins will give you a much needed mental boost. Im a great believer in chains of events occurring in devine order and maybe your year of sobriety was necessary to give you the clarity about your marriage and hopefully the strength you are going to need to deal with it. My heart goes out to you so much as I know the difficulty I have in sorting out the details to allow me to move forward. Again finding this unique little band of supporters isnt just here by accident and we will be here whenever you need us. :l

[Chillgirl]

AF AUGUST - WEEK 5

I went to my White Nite last night which was lovely, wandering through the streets with music everywhere and everyone dressed in white.....

[rustop61]

AF AUGUST - WEEK 5

Good morning everyone

Sorry I did not get to post yesterday. We had a power cut for hours so no computer and then it got crazy!!! My heart goes out to those of you struggling with ex's and errant hubbies. However, you are the strongest bunch of women I have encountered in a long time and I know things will work out for the best for all of you. Stay strong. Sped - everything happens for a reason, please vent and let us know when you are struggling. Nothing can take away from your 1 year AF achievement. Hope you enjoyed your 23 mile run.

Rusty - Hope you knee is better and well done on loosing a few pounds. I know how hard that is. I lost a stone early Spring, start of summer but need to get back to it again.

Lav - You brought back memories when you mentioned the chicks. My Mom used to get a box every year and they would come on the bus, they were adorable.

Star - The bridemaids gifts sound wonderful. There is so much to think of with a wedding.

Sooty, Dill, Chill, Papamom, Cyn and anyone else I missed. Have a great Sunday and AF week.

I give thanks every morning that I wake up AF and without a hangover. I nodded off the other evening on the couch and when I jerked awake for an awful moment I thought I had passed out. Whew the relief of no its not wine induced just plain old tiredness.

Rustop

[rustop61]

AF AUGUST - WEEK 5

Chill

Cross posted, what amazing photos. Let us know how it went.

Rustop

[papmom3]

AF AUGUST - WEEK 5

Chill- you live in a most magical place!! no wonder you don't want to leave!! Thank you for the piccys-they are gorgeous!!

Hey Rustop-glad you made it back to the land of technology!! I would definitely go crazy without my computer. Cable TV I can almost do without but not my internet!!

Chill-thank you for the thoughts. yes, I feel much better. I got home to let the dogs out and decided to check the garden as I hadn't since before the 5 days of monsoons. Oh My!! I will post a pic soon!! Over to my sis's for a very late dinner but fun with my little nephew (the one who had the party last weekend) as he was staying over while my bro and SIL went to a college reunion. It was a very nice evening. I had a water with lemon, my sis and BIL opened a bottle of wine but not until right before dinner which I thought was very respectful. I had a "discussion" with my other nephew about the yard work he did (or actually didn't) do for me 2 weeks ago and it was basically "am I calling him a liar or not". I think I ended it on a very positive note by saying if he is happy with the work he did then I will pay him but I wanted him to know I was not happy with it. I think 6 months ago it would have turned out very ugly indeed as it would have been fueled by AL on my part. Dinner was simple and lovely with grilled broccoli from my garden, chicken and rice pilaf. Sort of a restless nite for some reason but instead of running around like crazy this morning doing errands, I'm going to chill with my pups, do a little baking prep, head over to my sis's again after noon to say goodby to my neph and see my bro's new car then take the dogs into the vet for nail clipping and annual. After that, who knows!!
Have a great day everyone!!
:l

[papmom3]

AF AUGUST - WEEK 5

Look what was hiding in the garden!!

[Lavande]

AF AUGUST - WEEK 5

Good afternoon boys & girls

Chill - wonderful pics!!!!
Loved the girls with the angel wings, how nice! I'll bet you had a great time.

Hi Rustop - I feel absolutely panicky without internet access! Glad you're back!

Papmom - that zucchini needs to be stuffed & baked!!! I actually like them when they get that big

Well, the chicken coop prep is done, Mr Lav returned as promised to do a majority of the work then disappeared like Zorro...........such a strange man anymore.
I am taking care of my weekend ebay sales right now while waiting for EB grandson & his Mom. I'm putting some burgers on the grill tonight - nothing fancy. The 8th heatwave of the season is here, the AC is back on. The electric company must be loving me this summer!

Shelley, you are on my mind constantly, you too Chill!
I'm pretty darn sure the 3 of us will end up in a good place..........maybe we should build a man-proof fortress for ourselves & live in peace & tranquility. I'll bring the chicks along so we always have fresh brown eggs

Hello to Dill, LBH & everyone!

[spedteach]

AF AUGUST - WEEK 5

Papmom, that is one big zucchini. I say zucchini bread for that one.

Chill, loved your White Nite photos, reminded me of New Orleans.

Friends, 23 miles is no small feat. The thing that hurts the most is my poor little toes. I do believe now that come October, I will be able to run a marathon. We ran for 5 hours! (walk breaks).

Quiet recuperating day, movie watching, hanging with kitties. Ate peaches and ice cream for lunch. Work tomorrow, hope I can walk.

Sad email from my husband who thinks all the fuss is only about his phone call to my sister. Talk about not seeing the big picture.

Eggplant for dinner but not sure how yet. Any suggestions?

Sunday evening wishes to all.

[ladybirdheart]

AF AUGUST - WEEK 5

Beautiful festival photos Chill; you too Pap, that zucchini is a harvest party waiting to happen, like Lav, I think they are festive to stuff and roast. We shall indeed need photos of baby chicks, Lav, so sweet. Too bad you can?t also send out the sounds of their little peepy voices. Glad you ran the way you wanted to Shelley; I had eggplant for lunch incidentally, sliced and grilled with garlic and olive oil and then layered on flat bread with goat cheese, tomatoes, spinach and a bit of lemon. It was a nice treat in the middle of the horrors of building the utility room. Hope your knee is responding to care, Rusty, my shoulders are presently shot and anytime you like we can moan ensemble, howl at the moon. Hope you are well Sooty and Dill and Star and Rustop and all. I sign off to tend to a large washer that died full of heavy soapy clothes and towels in the middle of the muddy remodeling mess. I am temporarily doomed. I am glad I don?t have a martini anywhere nearby. Love, Ladybird.

[Rusty]

AF AUGUST - WEEK 5

Good Evening Everyone,

Thanks to the wonderful medical advice of the Dynamic Duo-Nurses Lav and Papmom-my knee is soooo much better. I should be able to take a brisk walk tomorrow. I followed your advice to a T. Iced it, elevated it and applied hot towels. The swim in the pool (no kicking) helped tons, too. Thank you again and again!

It's a great thing I have a great career because the car repairs are now at $1,800...the exhaust pipe is rusted underneath. Oh well. I will be buying a new car next week, I think.

Papmom-I vote for zucchini bread....or my mom's recipe of zucchini, stewed tomatoes, and onion. Delicious!

Chill-I loved the White Nite pictures! What a lively place to live.....I got a chuckle out of the women with the angels' wings.

Star-the bridesmaids' gifts sound fantastic! How is your son doing?

Ladybird-I wasn't fond of eggplant, but after looking at your recipe, I am willing to try it again.

Rustop-congratulations on losing a whole stone! Wow...good for you. I lhad ost 15 lbs. but put 4 back on. SIGH.

Rebirth-do you have any more pictures of India? I am going to Michigan on business this week and my client is from India. Where was that picture taken?

Sped-23 miles? Fabulous! I bet you kick butt at the marathon-you will be ready for sure!

Lav-chicks in the mail?!?! OMG! What I learn on this thread is a miracle.

Dill-how are you?

Hi Sooty! Are the kids glad to be back in school?

This is a wonderful thread-and I have been going back and forth as to whether to say this or not....I have been deeply troubled by Shelley's husband calling his relatives and saying that she drank. Mr. Lav's and Ex-Mr. Chill's behavior bother me as well. And I can't help but to think that if these three women here whom I've grown to be quite fond of-Shelley, Lav and Chill-had had kind, compassionate spouses-then maybe alcohol wouldn't have become a problem. The reason I say this is my aunt, who is 65-has been sober now for 3 years after 30 years of drinking, is married to a complete *sshole. He physically abused her early in their marriage (broke her jaw) and has been verbally abusive their entire 42-year marriage. If he had been compassionate instead of critical, condescending and a bully, then her drinking wouldn't have escalated like it did. She is finally sober after several stints in rehab, and I believe it's because finally, in counseling, he admitted he was part of the problem. NO SHIT!!!!!

My point is that I think for so many of us.....how serious our drinking problems become depends a lot on what kind of support system we have at home and around us. I think when our drinking becomes unmanageable, then part of our recovery should include our partners thinking about how their behavior might exacerbate the situation rather than help our recovery.

I know this is a long post but Lav, Shelley and Chill ...you have been so on my mind and in my step all weekend.

Good night and I'll talk to you tomorrow,

xoxoxo

Rusty

[Chillgirl]

AF AUGUST - WEEK 5

Good Morning Guys

Sped - I hope the toes are holding up, you really are an inspiration with all that running. Im sorry Mr Sped doesnt see the bigger picture, from the experience I have in relationships, men usually bury their heads in the sand for as long as possible instead of admitting things may not all be well. I guess its as much our responsibility to communicate whats going wrong but because we are angry and frustrated with them for not understanding we dont and so the non communication continues. Remember they are from Mars and we are from Venus!

Rusty - You are a sweet girl to be concerned for us with marital issues to resolve. My problem is that the one person in the world that always took care of me is the one I have conflict with and I just cant cope with that. I will always love him more than anything in the whole world and I know in my heart he is doing all he can. I really need to get a pair of Lav's TBGP's!

Lav - Your fortress sounds wonderful! Count me in!

This was a spiritual mesg I got this week and I think it describes exactly how I would like to deal with all difficulties that life may have in store for me.....

Giving up is not the answer. Neither is giving in. Stand your ground.
There is a way of doing that without having to be combative. There is a way of hanging on to your true self, and demonstrating it, without resorting to aggression.
But giving up and giving in is not the way.
Simply and quietly claiming your right to be You is the way.

After 6 days, I finally replied to my ex's email this morning and boy do I feel like a weight is off my shoulders! Im so glad I waited for the hurt and anger to subside and hopefully I have fullfilled my wish of being kind and reasonable in our ongoing discussions.

[Rusty]

AF AUGUST - WEEK 5

Chill,

I admire that you can be so controlled with regard to your ex-husband. I can understand how much you still love him.

I loved your message for today. Thank you for posting it.

I am leaving for Michigan this afternoon....I'll be in a very pretty part of the state with really nice clients.

Have a wonderful AF day, everyone!

xoxoxox

Rusty

[Stargazerlily]

AF AUGUST - WEEK 5

Monday, Monday,

Chill, loved the pictures from the White Festival, looks like it was a great time. You are lucky to live in such a beautiful area. You are so right in answering your ex with kindness and dignity. I always found that when I communicate with anger, whatever the situation is always gets worse.

Lav, good that you are getting things done around the house, the new chicks sound fun.

Rusty, sounds like you have a busy week, good that your knee is better.

Sped, continue to support you, good you have some time in the house by yourself. I agree with you that getting through the wedding is paramount, then afterwards you and hubby can sort things out...or not. I am impressed that you can run 23 miles, and not surprised that you hurt a bit.

Will try to check in tonight after work. Have a great AF day.

[dill]

AF AUGUST - WEEK 5

Good morning all,

Rusty have a safe trip!
My thoughts have been with you Sped. I guess I wasn't surprized to hear about your difficulties with Mr. Sped. You've alluded to it before. I keep you and Chill and Lav in my thoughts every day. You three are very strong women and I admire you all.
Chill, thank you for the passage. I enjoyed it. White night looked like a great time!
Lav, we're in for another heat wave this week. Yesterday was over 90! Let's hope this is the last one for the year.
Papmom, that was a huge zuchini!! Thanks for the pic. You should put eyes, nose and mouth on it and set it out on the counter for a couple of days to keep you company.:H
LBH, suds and mud and all around wet mess! I hope you got it sorted out. Is there a new washer in your future? I love my washer. It's a Cabrio by Whirlpool.


I had a busy and productive weekend, getting lots of cleaning done and getting in some walking both days. I found a funny talking parrot toy at Toys R Us and will be taking it to work with me today. You say a word or a phrase and it repeats what you say while flapping its wings and moving its beak. The preschoolers will love it! Unfortunately, I didn't make it through the weekend AF, but I am just going to move on. You all know I have not been able to close the door on alc completely, so it is no big surprise that I drank yesterday. However, I am OK this morning and thankfully did not drink enough to bring on a hangover.

I have a busy work week and need to be at my best, so, I'll be eating and drinking healthily and taking care of myself in general.

I like the name Serene September. Or September Serenity.
Rustop, Sooty, Rebirth, Star, all who check in, have a great AF MONDAY!

[Rusty]

AF AUGUST - WEEK 5

Good Morning Star and Dill,

Star-I agree with you about handling things calmly rather than with anger.

Dill-I drank on Friday, too. Glad you're ok this morning and ready to start your busy work week. I too plan to eat and drink healthily this week. I vote for September Serenity. What do you think, Chill?

Sped-I'll be thinking of you today...and agree with everyone here. Get through the wedding and then deal with Mr. Sped.

I've got to get back to work. I slept in until 5:00 this morning :-)

Happy Monday to Lav, Sooty, Rustop, Rebirth, Cyn, Papmom, LBH and anyone who drops by!

XOXOX