Weekly AA Thread - Sept. 27 - Oct. 2

[rebirth]

Weekly AA Thread - Sept. 27 - Oct. 2

Hi Uni! The more the merrier!Stick with us. x

DG she is not ready for a meeting at the moment. I have been texting her today but she is ignoring them.Most likely her phone is switched off.I dont know who her sponsor is.Shame. It's hard to know what to do...But I do feel very grateful for my sobriety while experiencing this. I dont want to go back to being a drunk. Definitely not. Everyone who relapses says that they regret it.

Like you said Mary. It's taken effort to get to here.I dont want to go through all that again. I know that if I go back to drinking I will wake up the next day wanting/wishing to quit. So why throw away the hard work for a weak moment.

But then again I have not had a bad experience in my sobriety. Just normal ups and downs but nothing as severe as death or anything else similar to that. I truely dont know how I would react if I had to face such a problem...time will tell.

[Doggygirl]

Weekly AA Thread - Sept. 27 - Oct. 2

Uni...WELCOME!!! So good to have you with us. Not sure if you have found these links yet so here they are just in case:

Daily Recovery Readings
Big Book On-line
Sobriety Calculator

Yes a motivator for me on the relapse front is certainly that I don't want to go through the pain of early sobriety ever again. Also, when I relapsed before it took me 8 months of struggle before I even COULD manage to get firmly back on the wagon and that scared the &$^% out of me. Not sure HOW long it would take if I relapse again.

rebirth, you can't do anything to help someone who isn't ready to get sober again other than maybe occassionally let her know you are thinking of her and would be happy to go to a meeting with her when she is ready. Thinking back to my own drinking, there was nothing anyone could do for me until I was ready either.

That reminds me - there is another girl who has been gone from AA for almost a year now. I text her maybe once a month to say hi and just let her know I'm thinking of her. Time to text!

DG

[rebirth]

Weekly AA Thread - Sept. 27 - Oct. 2

Dg how long were you sober the first time you relasped? Was it a bad experience?
I love the sobeity calculator by the way. Heatbeat calculator is so cool!

[Doggygirl]

Weekly AA Thread - Sept. 27 - Oct. 2

rebirth;970080 wrote: Dg how long were you sober the first time you relasped? Was it a bad experience?
I love the sobeity calculator by the way. Heatbeat calculator is so cool!

I drank on my 60 day anniversary. This was in 2007 and pre-AA. I was doing the MWO program with the exception of prescription meds. I succumbed to the usual "I'm not really that bad...now I can just drink one..." thinking. Well, the first day I had maybe 3 drinks and was very buzzed. I thought to myself "Wow! This is like....NORMAL!!" And I had a REALLY bad hangover the next day. After only 3 drinks! I thought I was fixed! I didn't even drink on hangover day!

So of course, this led me to think I could drink safely. On the 3rd day I drank. This time it was more. I think it took about one week to be right back to my old levels and modus operandi. (day drinking, sneaking, hiding, guilt & remorse, etc.)

So I really knew right away that drinking was a huge mistake. I had felt really good AF. So I tried to get back on the wagon. Even on the MWO supplements and using the hypnosis CD's etc., I just couldn't muster up more than a couple days at a time AF. It took me 8 months to finally get back on the wagon. I'm not even sure exactly how it happened because lord knows I wanted it for a long time.

Do I want to go through THAT again??? No. It was definitely NOT a good experience. Then after 8 months back to AF, I was still very fearful of relapse. I just had it in my mind that I would somehow drink before I could stop myself, and then I wouldn't be able to stop again. That nagging fear is what led me through the doors.

DG

[rebirth]

Weekly AA Thread - Sept. 27 - Oct. 2

Doggygirl;970086 wrote: Well, the first day I had maybe 3 drinks and was very buzzed. I thought to myself "Wow! This is like....NORMAL!!" And I had a REALLY bad hangover the next day. After only 3 drinks! I thought I was fixed! I didn't even drink on hangover day!

DG

Yeah I would have reacted the same way. To feel ill after three drinks and not want a drink when I was hungover was like the old times when I use to drink like a normie. I would have thought I was cured too.

I remember hearing a share about someone at the hospital waiting to be seen to because she fell on her leg while drunk. When the nurse stepped out the room she drank the surgical spirit. I wont ever forget that story.

[rebirth]

Weekly AA Thread - Sept. 27 - Oct. 2

oooooh. 8 more posts and I am a senior. ooooh

[Doggygirl]

Weekly AA Thread - Sept. 27 - Oct. 2

rebirth;970098 wrote: oooooh. 8 more posts and I am a senior. ooooh

Well then....we need a topic!!!!

Now my mind is blank. Now there's a new experience! :H

DG

[Doggygirl]

Weekly AA Thread - Sept. 27 - Oct. 2

Congratulations on your 1,000 posts rebirth!

I like todays message from Hazelden:

Today's thought from Hazelden is:

There is no such thing as "best" in the world of individuals.
--Hosea Bellou

We live in a society driven by the concept of competition. "We are Number One" is drummed in our ears daily via advertising and sporting events. The message is that we must be or must have something "better than" if we have any sense of pride at all. Failure is the only other option.

But human behavior can't be judged according to this kind of rating system. How could we ever determine who is the best listener, the most insightful or compassionate? At any given moment, the best for us may not be the best for someone else. If it goes right to the heart, a simple word spoken at a meeting is the best word. If someone we hardly know nods and smiles from across the room, that smile is the best smile for us, here and now. The extended hand, the brief word of encouragement, will never be proclaimed "Number One" on television, never be memorialized in record books as better than the support someone else got, but for us, it's the best.

I am surrounded by a multitude of blessings. I need look no further for what I need.

It really is the small things sometimes that matter the most. I also like how it mentions that I have to look no further for what I need. That reminded me of something my Mary Kay director says all the time.."I already have everything I need." I have been at her house when she is trying to figure out something like putting together a display or putting together dinner for our training group or whatever, and she will just stop and look around and repeat to herself "I already have everything I need. I already have everything I need." until she sorts it out. I'm starting to see the wisdom of that! (and I need to remember that next time I am at Macy's :H)

Today I am grateful that I already have everything I need. I need you guys, and I'm so grateful you are here for me.

DG

[universal]

Weekly AA Thread - Sept. 27 - Oct. 2

Today I am grateful that I already have everything I need. I need you guys, and I'm so grateful you are here for me.

DITTO!

[retteacher]

Weekly AA Thread - Sept. 27 - Oct. 2

DG: I'm glad you put into words your relapse experience, because I've had almost the exact one, many times over. I need to think about it once in a while lest I get that "I'm not so bad" feeling again. It still hits me frequently at speaker meetings when I hear someone who has been to jail, homeless, lost everything, etc. I almost hear myself saying: "That's really not me." But:
-it's alcoholic to drink til you pass out.
-it's alcoholic to hide bottles under the sink.
-it's alcoholic to lie on a daily basis.
-it's alcoholic to black out.
-etc.

I must remember that I do not want to go back there...ever.

Rebirth:
In the first year of my sobriety, my father died & my daughter was diagnosed w/breast cancer. Yes, I had the fleeting thoughts that alcohol would make it all a little easier. But, I didn't drink, & I'm so much better for it.
-I could speak coherently at my father's memorial service.
-I can continue to help my daughter through this cancer crisis...surgeries, medication, child-care, etc.

Now that I've gotten through some pretty tough stuff sober, I would never, ever want to do otherwise. I've been given the gift of confidence by my HP that yes, I can do this. It isn't easy, but I can do it.

Mary

[rebirth]

Weekly AA Thread - Sept. 27 - Oct. 2

Gosh Mary. That really touched me.. What strength. Thats made me even more determined to win this battle.I want to be able to deal with anything life throws at me without reaching for the bottle.Relapse stories are important to me because I need to be reminded constantly that AL is cunning and patient...

DG that was a lovely read. This thread is so inspiring!! And thank you for my very own thread in ref to the 1000 posts. That made my day. Lol.

Hi Uni.

Today I am grateful that I already have everything I need. I need you guys, and I'm so grateful you are here for me

A big thank you for helping me stay sober another day. x

[rebirth]

Weekly AA Thread - Sept. 27 - Oct. 2

Mary- Whats so rediculous is that one should be coherent and available for your family when they need you the most.but it's only when you are sober that you can see that.That stuff is unbelievably addictive! Alcohol always made me think that it came first before evreything in my life.. all it brought was self pity. And plenty of it! Thanks for your story

[retteacher]

Weekly AA Thread - Sept. 27 - Oct. 2

Last night's meeting was on tradition 9. I love reading about the founders & their struggles to come up w/"rules" only to say there should be no organization & rules. What if we had the rule that you could only relapse 3 times & then you're out! There would be a lot of people left in the cold. There was a guy there whom I've seen in & out since I joined 1.5 years ago. He's back again, hopefully for the last time. He said he was grateful that he was welcomed back w/smiles...no recriminations. Mary

[cpn1004]

Weekly AA Thread - Sept. 27 - Oct. 2

Mary, reading your post made me think about this past year. Tomorrow I have 300 days of continuous sobriety and if not for a slip last December, I'd have 386 days. But in that 300 days, my brother died, my mother died and I did not drink through any of that pain. I just "felt" it all, hmmmm, like normal people might experience it.
I have AA and MYO to thank for my recovery so far. And I started thinking about AA after you started attending. We may never know how we touch each other's lives.

[Doggygirl]

Weekly AA Thread - Sept. 27 - Oct. 2

Hello all. Mary, I too am amazed at the survival of the organization with so little structure and "rules." The more I study the traditions the more respect I have for them. I am also trying to do a better job figuring out how to apply them in all aspects of my life. It sure has worked for AA.

Phil, what a beautiful post. I spent YEARS thinking that is only my life would get easy (boss stop being a jerk, husband stop being a jerk, dog stop being a jerk, etc.) then I could quit drinking. I'm so grateful to finally "get" that life doesn't make me drink - alcoholism does. And as long as I don't touch the first one, I can live freely. You and Mary and so many others show us every day that we DO NOT have to drink because life is rough sometimes. Thank you for continuing to be here, and CONGRATULATIONS on 300 days AF!!!! :yougo::yougo::yougo: I remember your struggles "back when" and I am so glad the miracle has happened for you.

DG