Weekly AA Thread - Oct. 4 - Oct. 10

[dancelot]

Weekly AA Thread - Oct. 4 - Oct. 10

Rebirth - My sister also suffered from Type 1 diabetes, so I know all too well how it is. :l

Good luck too in finding your sponsor - I think it might be like the saying about when the student is ready, the teacher will appear.

[rebirth]

Weekly AA Thread - Oct. 4 - Oct. 10

Dance I am definitely ready. Especially now. My life has become very difficult and I could very easily fall into a depression. My sobriety and my son keeps me up beat but I need the spiritual growth to stay strong.

Hope everyone has a good friday. x

[retteacher]

Weekly AA Thread - Oct. 4 - Oct. 10

I went to a step meeting last night (8). It's really so essential to keep working the steps. A little each day. It doesn't have to be a big thing. Mary

[Cinders]

Weekly AA Thread - Oct. 4 - Oct. 10

Hello, all,

My sponsor sent me an email. She said the last part made her think of me.

I thought I would share. This may help others, too.

Meditation For The Day

You must always remember that you are weak but that God is strong.
God knows all about your weakness. He hears every cry for mercy,
every sign of weakness, every plea for help, every sorrow over
failure, every weakness felt and expressed. We only fail when we
trust too much to our own strength. Do not feel bad about your
weakness. When you are weak, that is when God is strong to help
you. Trust God enough, and your weakness will not matter. God
is always strong to save.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may learn to lean on God's strength. I pray that I
may know that my weakness is God's opportunity.

[retteacher]

Weekly AA Thread - Oct. 4 - Oct. 10

Cindi: What a great meditation that is! Sometimes I really do think I'm in charge, & it still amazes me that I still have that thinking. I know that I wouldn't be sober today wo/God, AA, & MWO. My will & my power is far too feeble to have gotten me to this point. The only way I can stay sober is to continue to listen to what God wants for me.

I'm heading out to a meeting in a few minutes & am looking forward to it. I see my friends & study the Big Book. It doesn't sound exciting, but it is to me.

Mary

[Doggygirl]

Weekly AA Thread - Oct. 4 - Oct. 10

Hello everyone. Cindi, I too like that reading.

Once again I find myself wishing I could somehow share all that was discussed in the meetings I attended yesterday and today. At "tough chicks" yesterday we started the Workbook portion of Step 3 in "A Woman's Way Through the Twelve Steps." It is so awesome to go through these exercises with so many other women and hear what they all have to say. There are a very wide variety of sobriety times, experience levels, backgrounds, etc. in the group. I just love getting all the different feedback. The main focus of discussion yesterday was on "Control" (and our attempts to control what we cannot) and on the companion defect - worry. (and how futile it is) I can absolutely say that when I find myself worried, it is most likely because I am wanting to control something I cannot control. All a bunch of highly wasted energy.

Today at Big Book study we read the pages in the BB that contain the promises, and also one of my very favorite lines in the book - "the spiritual life is not a theory - we have to live it." I'm so glad that Sister made me highlight that line, and really talked with me about it, when we went through this part of the book.

Sister is doing an admirable job (and setting a great example for me) of handling this latest news of the mini strokes. We got to have lunch together yesterday at the Mother House along with another Sister who is my Sister's closest friend on the "inside." (:H How is that for a new term meaning "where the nuns live?") The three of us had lots of laughs and just a very light hearted time. I never in a million years would have imagined myself having lunch EVER with nuns. Much less enjoying myself so much. Before lunch, Sister and I sat outside - the weather was gorgeous - and we talked. She had me read from the Big Book her two favorite passages. I didn't know before that they were her favorites. We read the "Acceptance" passage from the stories, and also page 164. She told me that if I feel I need to find another sponsor because of her failing health and limited time focusing on our studies that she would understand. I told her I wanted her as my sponsor as long as she will have me. This is a life long journey and there will be plenty of time later to re-work the steps under the guidance of a different sponsor.

Hope everyone is having a great weekend.

DG

[retteacher]

Weekly AA Thread - Oct. 4 - Oct. 10

DG: Your paragraph about your talk w/Sister out in the sunshine brought tears to my eyes. Who in the world would we ever have a discussion with that is so intimate & heartfelt but w/an AA friend like Sister? I'm going to read those passages as soon as I have a chance. AA has opened up a new world of friendships to me that I didn't even know I missed. Tomorrow a group of us are going on a hike together. I know it will be light-hearted & fun & will not depend on any kind of artificial high.

We're doing OK here. My daughter just found out about a parent of one of her students who has just discovered a recurrance of her breast cancer. It came as an emotional blow to Patty, as it hits very close to home. She's dealing w/her feelings as they come (wo/any kind of "medication" I might add). Today, we've decided on some shopping therapy...I want to outfit the g-sons to the nines. That'll cheer us both up.

Take care one & all.

Mary

[Doggygirl]

Weekly AA Thread - Oct. 4 - Oct. 10

Mary, I love what you said about outings these days that can be light hearted and fun and need no artificial high. It's such a huge step I think to realize that we CAN enjoy our lives and work through our problems and live life on life's terms without an artificial high to do it. It must be as unsettling for a cancer survivor to hear about recurrance as it is for us to hear about relapse. Maybe more so? I don't know. I guess recurrance of anything bad that threatens our very lives is frightening, no matter what it is. No point in trying to figure out which is better / worse. Cancer and alcoholism both kill people.

We discussed Step 3 today at the 12&12 meeting. A good step that I feel I understand better as time goes on. Makes me feel there must be so much more to understand that I haven't a clue about yet. I guess that is what makes the AA adventure interesting. There is always more to consider if we are seeking that. One guy said something interesting today. He was talking about self will and how far that got him (he nearly died of a gun shot wound over drugs). He said he always felt guilt and remorse when he knew he hurt others, but he never really cared if he hurt himself. (and didn't realize how self harm DOES hurt others) Something about the way he said that felt like a bullseye hitting home. I'm not sure what that means but I know it's something a need to explore further. Considering my dance with various life threatening devils (anorexia, alcohol addiction, suidice thoughts and plans) there are probably some underlying things I need to work on. Hmmm....

Another guy who I hadn't met before was back to AA 12 days sober after a multi-year relapse. He described his journey to sobriety which started years ago. AL started causing problems in his career and family. He came to AA and stayed sober about 1.5 years. He thought he was "fixed" and drank again. Eventually things got worse and he came back to AA, this time sober 4 years. He drank again. Things got worse again. This time, he says "I lost everything." Based on how he shared, I assume that means job, family, drivers license, etc. He said he never felt humbled in this way before. I hope he makes it this time. Another story of relapse that reminds me I can never let down my guard. I think there is a lot of life experience and wisdom that can come with time in the program. But length of sobriety means nothing in terms of a guarantee I won't drink again. While I say those words on the surface, I wonder if I really, 100% believe them in my heart. I need to work on it until I'm sure I know that I am just as vulnerable to relapse as anyone else. I need to ALWAYS work my program.

DG

[dancelot]

Weekly AA Thread - Oct. 4 - Oct. 10

Great posts!

Cinders - I love that meditation - thank you for sharing. That's a keeper.

DG - Thanks for sharing about your visit with Sister. That touches my heart. I agree with Mary, where else but with an AA friend does that happen (at least for us)?

I had a crappy day yesterday (nothing major in reality). I had two extremely hurtful experiences (combined with hormones), the kind of thing that would have sent me drinking in the past. Interestingly, while I was very hurt, and cried a lot, the thought of drinking never once entered my mind.

That saying about the obsession to drink being removed came to mind. I've heard others say it, but it's been somewhat abstract to me for some reason. When I realized it hadn't even come to mind... now that is new. Sometimes on a difficult day, while not really thinking of doing it, or wanting to, I've at least said to myself, "Now I remember why I drank." That didn't even cross my mind. More progress for me, I am happy to say.

I didn't make any meetings this week, since I've had this horrible cough and can barely talk. Hopefully by tomorrow that will be cleared up enough to go my Monday night meeting.

There's a new meeting another night I want to check out, where they meditate for 20 minutes then have a discussion, and it's held by candlelight. I didn't want to be hacking through that, so didn't check it out last week like I'd wanted to.

Hi to Rebirth, Mary, Phil, Cherbear, MG, and anyone I missed! Hope everyone has a great week!