I am heading off to Hawaii in a couple of hours so I am up even earlier than normal. I will be offline for the first day or so, so don't worry if you don't see me around. Hopefully, after that I will be checking in from time to time, as long as the hotel doesn't charge something outragous for a wireless connection. (Remember my trip to Las Vegas? $12.95 per day for internet? Geez.)
I was just looking at my daily meditation book and here's the gist of today's topic:
"I can do things that I never did before. Liquor took away my initiative and my ambition. I couldn't get up the steam to start anything. I let things slide. ..... Now I can sit down and do something. I can write letters that need to be written. I can make telephone calls that need to be made. I can work in my garden. I can pursue my hobbies. I have the urge to create something, that creative urge that was completely stifled by alcohol. I am free to achieve again. Have I recovered my initiative?"
Now, I'm finding that as time goes by (Day 47 here) I am feeling more and more initiative and ambition. Whereas I used to feel completely (forgive the word but) impotent, I now feel able to achieve almost anything. I am getting up and about and taking on new projects. For example a couple of weeks ago I went on a decorating spree, after 3 years of bare walls and floors in this apartment. Why now? I think it's this re-awakening of the creative energy inside, this energy that was stifled by alcohol.
Are you finding that your initiative is coming back to life? Not just creativity, but getting off your rear end and getting things done?
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