AF daily - Thursday, October 7th

[Marshy]

Hello abbers!

I read an interesting article about suicide yesterday (bear with me!). It was trying to explain why people kill themselves when something goes wrong in their lives which an outsider wouldn't think was particularly important in the grand scheme of things (say, losing a job).

Couple of lines struck me: "We feel ourselves to be what others think we are. Or what we think they think we are."

I certainly sometimes am bothered what people think, or more likely, what I think they think. And most of the time it turns out they weren't thinking any such thing. Probably hadn't even been thinking about me at all. :H

I know that this in part has related to my drinking in the past.

From today I'm going to be conscious of when I'm doing that and work on changing it. Somehow.

I haven't had time to catch up on everyone's goings-on yet (although isn't it great that we have goings-on, good and bad, rather than just sitting at home with our heads in a bottle?) but, Rebirth, wishing you strength to deal with your relationship problems.

OK, I'm off to work - cycling along the canal in the sunshine this morning. How lovely. Have a good day all!

[Guitarista]

AF daily - Thursday, October 7th

Morning Marshy and Fabby Abber's everywhere!

Geez Marshy, if i had the attitude i have now back in my 20's/30's, i would've kicked a bit more arse in my life, with the opportunities that abounded at the time. BUT! I am not complaining, and i'm kicking butt now anyway, and better late than never. What often would hold me back in life, was what i thought people would think of me, or what i thought they thought. What a load of rubbish, and a total waste of my time for me to think like that, and get all worried. I don't care what people think of me anymore, and when you realise that not everyone is going to like who you are, what you look like, what you stand for, or what they think you stand for, you're free to be you, and go out there and acheive. Freedom! It's easier said than done though, i know, but we must strive for our right to be ourselves, in public. Am i sounding like a politician now? :H

Anyway, hope everyone's getting some _______________ :h

[Doggygirl]

AF daily - Thursday, October 7th

Good morning Marshy and G-Man! Thanks for getting us started with such a great topic. I too spent a TON of time in my life thinking / worrying / obsessing / drinking over what I thought others thought of me. I would get the most amazing and detailed scenarios all worked up in my head. Absolutely no basis in reality. And you are right - I'm quite sure other people spend about zero time thinking about me!!! I like this saying..

"Your opinion of me is none of my business." I believe that is stolen from Chillgirl. I find myself using that line in my head if I am heading in that direction to worry what others are thinking.

You are also right Marshy that today there IS a lot going on in our lives!!! For that I am sure grateful. For me today it's community leadership school and volunteer work in the Family Center. I hope I don't catch the flu bug going around there. A few errands and Curves. And I WILL EAT SENSIBLY JUST FOR TODAY. WWODAT.

One thing is for sure...

DG

[Gaia]

AF daily - Thursday, October 7th

Morning Babes (and Gman),

Marshy just tell yourself "I am what I think." A bad turn isn't to bad if you see it as a pothole. Over the long run the road is smooth and clear. It's all about visualization.

Bear and RB you just let yourself have a good cry! Better to have a real cry than a slobbering drunking cry. It's much more refreshing!

OK now I'm watching all the Jack videos. I think Osteen copied him.

So here's Jack's 10 point plan. I'll go for 9 out of 10.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8eB4cQO4sjo&feature=related[/video]]YouTube - Jack Lalanne - 10 Point Plan

[greeneyes]

AF daily - Thursday, October 7th

Gooooooood Morning Fabbies!

G-Bloke for pressie!!

Jack LaLane is still alive?:shocked: He must be on to something then - better give the videos a lookie.

Marshy, remember that list of 6 things I posted about fear? The first one was "stop looking for other people's approval to determine you own self worth" I wonder if the "what we think they think" is some sort of projection we do relative to our own feelings of self worth. Thank goodness that gets better with the absence of AL!

I've got some dental consultations lined up to move camp to my part of the state. I am simply doing consultations at this point to select new mouth people. I've never done doctor interviews before, but it makes perfect sense to me. Just like hiring any other professional I guess.

Speaking of healthy food.... I got a whole trout yesterday and smoked it in my little stove top smoker and WOW!!! If I didn't live so far from where I got it, I'd take those fellas a bite. I've done well with no sugar. Lots of fruit though.

Have a lovely AF day!

[universal]

AF daily - Thursday, October 7th

Yo Bitches!!!

I'm off to the psychologist again this morning - need another appointment after Mondays group therapy session that brought up some issues I was hoping to not deal with quite so soon. Evidentially my higher power thinks I need to deal with them now! But that's okay, I know that I can do it and with help will get them sorted out.

I'm tired, I haven't been sleeping well. I'm hoping that todays "unload" will help in that department too. But on a bright note I am positive and sober!!

Love you guys!
Uni

[Lavande]

AF daily - Thursday, October 7th

GM Abbers!

Uni, hope today's appoint does the trick for you

Marshy, I think I mentioned this here once before but here is my feeling on opinions:

Opinions are like assholes, everyone has one & it's best to keep yours to yourself.:H

Greenie, I found a cute kiddie dentist a few years ago. I call him a kid because he's the same age as my son.......it was shocking at first but he's turned out to be very good

Well, I need to get moving, lots to do today.
Wishing everyone a terrific AF Thursday.
Lav

[rebirth]

AF daily - Thursday, October 7th

Good afternoon people,

Mr G I am liking what you said. I certainly wasted way too much time on what people think. I always wanted to be liked...now I know that it doesnt get me anywhere. Infact I tend to become used/taken for granted alot because of it.

Infact in my sobriety I seem to be slowly gathering an inner assuredness. I have been kicking ass and thinking less of the consequences. I told a couple of people this week how I really felt. They were taken back but I was honest. I am obviosly transforming..

I am meetin up with my BF this weekend ( hadnt planned to) to see whether he really intends to make our relationship work. Gonna have another chat with him about his alcohol consumption. I find it ironic that he use to tell me that I have a drink problem. In comparison to me he looked normal...

I have been good with the sugar so far. Will only indulge at the weekends

[LVT25]

AF daily - Thursday, October 7th

Hello friends,

It amazes me that we can go back to the 50's with Jack L. and see all of the common sense ways to live a good life. I think I will start looking at his videos more closely too. My friend on facebook has been posting the videos he does on facial exercises. Thanks for sharing the link again Gaia!

I am also guilty of worrying about what others think--or if I may have said or done something wrong if they act a little off. It is a co-dependency thing and our thinking that we are in control of things we are not. I try to make a constant effort to not judge others, so in turn they better not judge me!

Yesterday was a busy one. We had a prevention coalition meeting and from that I will find myself at the city council meeting to discuss why it would not be a good idea to let the bars stay open until 2 am here. I can't believe it is even an issue. One more hour to drink and get drunker and then drive home. One bar owner in town wants to see this happen, I would think it will just make his job harder, but I guess he must need the extra $$.
There have been some major steps backwards in the alcohol arena in our state, and I am quite disappointed in our governor. He recently signed a bill lifting a ban on alcohol in our state parks. A 15 year ban. Now I used to like to drink a beer or 20 just like a lot of other people while camping, fishing, etc. But unfortunately, too many people abuse alcohol and bad things happen. Plus it gives minors easy peasy access to it. He is saying most people didn't care one way or the other, but I'm pretty sure he got more input from those against it, the meeting the coalition attended had about 100 people against lifting the ban, and 1 for. The radio talk show I listened to with him taking calls had many against, and I only heard one call in for. There are some limitations I guess. No drinking after 10 pm :H and the one big lake near us where there have been people killed on the beach, highway and in boats won't have alcohol allowed. My opinion is that someone(s) paying the Game and Parks and/or the governor's retirement fund here.

Ok, sorry I didn't warn you to get a snack. Have a great day all.:h

[Cinders]

AF daily - Thursday, October 7th

Morning Abbers!!

Gaia, your link led me to another on there. Jack was way ahead of his times!!

DG, you will appreciate this one, too.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LJVEPB_l8FU&feature=related[/video]]YouTube - Jack Lalanne - Sugarholics

Uni, I am glad you are sorting out your issues. I am sure it is painful but getting rid of those resentments is the only way. :l

Mr. G. I so love hearing from you. Always happy when you drop by.

Marshy, You really hit on an important topic today. Us alcoholics tend to take our resentments out by drinking. (Kind of odd, we hurt ourselves when we imagine others have hurt us. doh) But, worrying about what others think about us leads to resentment. Us alcoholics need to avoid resentment at all cost. (HALT - get rid of the anger one..)

Our knowledge of the universe stops right outside our skin. When we start projecting what others are thinking about us, we are in unsafe territory. At the other end of the spectrum, when someone blatantly upsets us, we have to let go of that anger asap.

I know this is not the AA thread by this came in this morning and so applies to today's thread.

The spiritual axiom referred to in the Tenth Step??every time we are disturbed, no matter what the cause, there is something wrong with us??also tells me that there are no exceptions to it. No matter how unreasonable others may seem, I am responsible for not reacting negatively. Regardless of what is happening around me I will always have the prerogative, and the responsibility, of choosing what happens within me. I am the creator of my own reality. When I take my daily inventory, I know that I must stop judging others. If I judge others, I am probably judging myself. Whoever is upsetting me most is my best teacher. I have much to learn from him or her, and in my heart, I should thank that person.

Those are hard words to live by but worth doing.

Greenie, Yeppers, Jack is still alive and selling juicers on TV.

Lav, Love your saying!! Thanks for a good laugh and a way to look at someone else's opinions if they are hurtful.

Oh, and I am still sober!! Yay. My goal is to make it to rehab AF. Just like Uni did.

Love to all and all to come,
Cindi

[Accountable for Me]

AF daily - Thursday, October 7th

Mornin'!

Such a good topic this morning! I really needed to read those today. Thanks to you all and to the Universe!

Day three. Was up coughing all night, but this morning it is better to be tired from coughing and not from being hungover!

I hope everyone has a nice day today. My little one's school has early dismissal and then parent-teacher interviews this early evening. She is in Kindergarten, so it will be informal. Her teacher, and I believe the other younger kids class teachers, are baking macaroni for us parents and the students. Then we get to see what our kids have been doing this past month. I am excited. I know that my little one is certainly excited to have dinner at school!

[Determinator]

AF daily - Thursday, October 7th

Yo Canis lupus familiaris!!!!!

Marshy what a great thought provoking start for this day. hmmmm I do indeed care what others think of me but refuse to be consumed/crippled by it as I did when I was still a drinker.

Cindi, so glad you're AF and with us rock on

I got in a good workout yesterday and have the bruises to prove it!

zoom zoom

be well

[Doggygirl]

AF daily - Thursday, October 7th

Cindi, I love that reading. There is truth to it for me. I also remember back to the days when I completely misunderstood AA and the first step declaration of powerlessness over alcohol. I (like many many people) thought it meant that in AA, there is a belief that we are powerless people and are not responsible for our own behavior. That reading sure dispells the myth. Glad you shared that.

DG

[Doggygirl]

AF daily - Thursday, October 7th

Wow - his 84 year old wife (late in the clip) is pretty amazing too.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AkdYrAQJu6g&feature=fvw[/video]]YouTube - Jack LaLanne at Age 95

DG

[skootiemom]

AF daily - Thursday, October 7th

Only 10 seconds back at MWO...

and I have written out Jack's 10 Point Plan!

I love it. SIMPLE and common sense.

I shall tape it to my bedroom mirror and start my day with it!

Thank- you old friends!

Skoots