October Optimism - Week 2

[paguy]

October Optimism - Week 2

Good Monday Morning Folks:

Getting a slow start here this morning. Similar to you, Star, I was up very early both days this weekend but this morning it?s a slow go. I enjoy waking up extra early on weekend mornings because I?m more in control of my days and thoughts and I guess I?m more at peace with that. There you have it ? more on the whole control theme!

Chill ? Great job on achieving 9 months AF ? Congratulations! You should be so proud of yourself. Your recent dream really gives you something to think about, doesn?t it? Sometimes loving and caring for someone just isn?t enough to make a relationship work. I know you will be able to work through this rationally.

Being one of the few guys here, I will be the first to admit that men are terrible communicators. My partner, for one, is the absolute worst. He can be pig-headed and stubborn, too! I can?t tell you how many times over the 20+ years we?ve been together we?ve not talked to one another for a day or two because of a lack of communication. It has gotten a wee bit better over the past couple of years because I have really forced the issue of talking about things rather than avoiding talking about things. Frequently, I am up against conversations he has had with himself about an issue or situation that he claims he has discussed with me. But, I know for sure, he has not discussed with me. He resolves things internally and moves on, assuming that I was part of the discussion ? FRUSTRATING!

Rusty ? can?t wait to hear of your escapades in France. I don?t recall you saying ? is this your first time there and is this a new client?

Well, our Philadelphia Phillies ?swept? the Cincinnati Reds last night with a 2-0 shutout. So, we are headed to the National League Championship Series again! (Sorry for the Twins, SD!).

Need to start getting my head around some things that are going on at work today so off I go? Hope you all have a peaceful day?.

[spedteach]

October Optimism - Week 2

Morning everybody,
It's a bit nippy here. Must be in the 40's. Wonderful to say goodbye to people you love when you know you will see them soon. Put son #3 on a train for LA yesterday afternoon, knowing I will see him in Denver next weekend.

Dill, I apologize for my reactive post. I see red when I see the words "higher power". It's interesting, all I remembered after I read that reading was "Above all our real trust should be in our HP."
Maybe I have PTSD from staying in AA for so long (insert laughing emoticom).

Cyn, liked your comments about house energy. Mine seems to be running smoothly at the moment, ready to let me flee. My kitties though know something's up, following me everywhere.

Chill, jealous of your rain. Bet your part of the world was beautiful on your morning walk.

Lav, I love your chicken board. It's exactly like something I would buy.

Rusty, eat something French and tell us about it. I want to go to Europe so much. Have to realize there's nothing stopping me but myself. Doing it alone is a little intimidating but doing it in a tourist group would not be for me. Rusty, don't work too hard.

Morning all to come. I work at a school today that starts at 7:20, my kind of hours.

[spedteach]

October Optimism - Week 2

Pay, morning. This line of yours summed things up perfectly: "He resolves things internally and moves on, assuming I was part of the discussion." Can't tell you how often that happens.

Here's a peaceful day back at you.

[Lavande]

October Optimism - Week 2

GM all - I'm here & that's about all I can say for now.
Have a bunch of things to do today.

Will be back later.
Wishing everyone a wonderful AF Monday. Chill, CONGRATS on your 9 months - woo hoo
Lav

[rustop61]

October Optimism - Week 2

Hi everyone

Absolutely glorious weather wise here today so have spent the whole morning in the garden. Might as well enjoy this sunshine while we have it.

This is a busy thread, I still have not caught up on everyone's posts over the week-end.

Chill - Congratulations on the 9 months, you should be very proud of yourself.

Lav - Loved the pics of the chicks, hope things get resolved next week with Mr Lav.

Rusty - Glad you had a good experience with Aer Lingus. They are not as good as they used to be but maybe not the worst. Enjoy Paris.

LBH - Hope you manage to resolve your issues too. Hang in there.

Dill, Star, Paguy, Sooty, Guitarista, Sped and anyone else I missed big hello. Have a great week.

Rustop

[Rusty]

October Optimism - Week 2

Bon Soir Mes Amis,

It's been another glorious day here....75 degrees and not a cloud in the sky. I took some pictures with my IPhone and will try to figure out how to post some of them.

PA-to answer your question....no, this is not a new client. This is my 3rd time here. This has also been my happiest time here. When I was here for the 1st time in December, 2007, I had spent several days touring Paris before meeting with my client, and I had this anxious feeling that something was horribly wrong at home but my mother, brothers and sister would not tell me what was going on. I called and left numerous messages, e-mails...no response. I came home from Paris to learn my mother had been in the hospital for emergency surgery. She had Stage 3 colon cancer. My brothers and sister didn't want to tell me because they thought it would ruin my first trip to Paris! :upset: I was so overwhelmed with anger that they would keep a secret from me like that and they ended up ruining my holiday anyway because I was filled with fear. Well you can imagine where I ended up....drowning my anxiety at the hotel bar.

This visit is soooo different. I am AF, I am enjoying every minute and I have Skyped with my family every day. I am calm, happy and worry-free

There is a lovely neighborhood nearby where I ran yesterday afternoon and this evening....I just find beautiful flowers, landscaping, and manicured yards to be extremely soothing. People here take pride in their homes and yards....all gated homes in this community, which I hear is very common in this village.

Sped-if I think of it next time, I will write down what I ate and describe it, as requested.

Hope all my friends here have a lovely AF evening! Back to work for me!

xoxo

Rusty

[rebirth]

October Optimism - Week 2

HI everyone,
Just a quick hello as i have not had time to read everyone's posts. But I see that Chill has had a birthday ( CONGRATULATIONS!!!) and something is not quite right with LBH. Hope you are okay LBH? Will need to read up another night..

Rusty I also love beautiful flowers, landscaping and maicured lawns. They put me in a type of trance. In the uk we have alot of open garden shows. The british are wonderful gardeners and some of their gardens are heavenly. I wish I could plant like that but everything dies in my hands.

I nearly drank on saturday night. Woke up with a head full of thoughts and just wanted to get rid of them. I said to myself that I had done well, that I deserved this drink and that I will get myself back on track very soon afterwards. But I secretly knew that I wouldnt be able to stop and was afraid. ..Man did I do battle. I ended up buying a bottle of wine and staring at it for three hours. I called people, I cried alot. I got angry with myself. I couldnt beleieve I was doing this.

In the end I poured the wine down the drain. But this incident has left me somewhat shaken. I thought i was faily safe after four months of sobriety but i see now that I will have to take it to another level if I want to stay sober. It's my head. I am not good with dealing with life. It's okay when life is good, but when it's not I seem to lose it. I am so grateful that I didnt drink but it was close.

Hugs to you all. I almost lost you wonderful people.

[sdlovespackers]

October Optimism - Week 2

Hola ALL!
Well I had inservice ALL day..snoooooozzzeee!!! But that's ok cuz now it's over and I'm getting ready for some MONDAY NIGHT FOOTBALL!! And RUSTY...I don't buy it for one minute about Brett!! In this day and age what you can do with voice stuff on the computer...plus the fact the news came out RIGHT AFTER the news about Moss and JUST before the game in NY....PLUS...and here's the BIG ONE...did you see the pictures??? Ummm....NOT BRETT!!! God did not bless him with the talent like he has on the field and then play the hugest (or should I say smallest) joke and give him "that" to work with down below...if ya know what I mean!!:H Nope, our Brett is a good guy....I'm also a HUGE Packer fan....(as well as Brett fan)...I have a whole room in my downstairs dedicated to the Packers!!

Congrats Chill on 9 months!!! Woohoo!!!!

Rebirth--Way to go on "just saying no" I work in a school can you tell?!?! I had a super rough weekend as well. You did awesome!! AL has always been our natural defense...it's easy to go back to what we know...but you didn't because you are learning and KNOW that it's not the way to help solve the world's problems....us mom's need to do that sober! Remind me of my words ok!!!:H

Lav-Cute chicki-poos!!!
Ok....Twins lost Cyn....who are you cheering for now??? Phillies??? What about San Fran??? I'm not sure who to cheer for....pretty sure not the Yanks! But I've got go order my hot wings......and get ready for the game...got my guacamole made and chips out....so weird without beer....seriously!!! But that's ok....lemon water is gonna be awesome!! First game as a 41 year old....go Favre!!! See you in the morning!!
Peace!
SD

[cyntree]

October Optimism - Week 2

Quick check-in tonight, this will be a long week of a final push to get the house ready, and on Friday I have a birthday party I'm throwing for my step-daughter (theme is Frida Kahlo inspired). So every minute has got to count, and I'm in for 15 hour days. Thank goodness I love to sand, patch, paint and declutter. Got a storage locker which is nearly full all ready, eeeek!

RB - what an heroic battle you undertook. Good for you - I don't know too many people who would grapple with the craving for 3 hours and then pour it down the drain. Give yourself a ton of credit - I think you have incredible backbone. And more than that, in a tough situation you put yourself first, instead of your craving. So impressive! I am sending you lots of healing energy; I hope that things get better for you soon.

SD - you crack me up, you sports-fan. Congrats on the lemon water with the guacamole!

Dill - The Colombian people are at the top of my list for sweet, generous, loving and fun-loving people (which is why the violence in that country pains me so...), and so I guess someone must have explained to me what I said. I remember that then we all had a great laugh together - and I felt rather happy that I had finally made a real joke!

Rusty - love hearing about your environment. I also adore gardens, and the French manicured ones always make me feel like there is the possibility of ordered elegance...give them a happy once-over for me!

LBH - thinking of you...

Take care all -

[rustop61]

October Optimism - Week 2

Good morning everyone

Rebirth - Well done on pouring that bottle out. I certainly have not been that strong in the past. Hubby drinks red wine and it is always there and open which has proved my downfall more than once.

LBH - Thinking of you.

Rusty - Hope you are still enjoying Paris.

Cyn - We are having a party for my daughters 18th next week but thankfully it is not at home. There is a small hotel in our local village with a nice sized function room. A lot of places wont take 18 year olds as you have the problem of some 17 year olds being there and underage drinking. A bit apprehensive about it, I have organized a bus for them to and from.

Am having a neighbourhood gathering next week as well so it is going to be a busy week.

Dill, Star, Sped, Lav, Sooty, Chill, Rusty, SD, Guitarista and anyone else I missed big hello.

Rustop

[Guitarista]

October Optimism - Week 2

Hi folk's!

Rustop, can your husband be a bit more 'discreet' with the wine somehow? Yep, you know it's there, but can it be less 'in your face' out of respect for you? Cap/cork the bottle, and keep it less in the line of sight perhap's?

How's Paris Rusty? Hope you're getting time to enjoy it.

RB. The fact that you bought a bottle home, and didn't drink it, is very symbolic, and means a lot, i think. It is symbolic in that you didn't drink it. So why was that? Why didn't you drink it? It say's to me that you're thinking is slowly shifting in the positive, even though you brought the bottle home. Yep, you brought a bottle home, so that is a worry, BUT, you did not drink it. So good job. You could use this scary episode as an energy to take you to the next level of your commitment to yourself, your child, your sobriety, and your freedom.

Best wishes everyone.

[Chillgirl]

October Optimism - Week 2

Good Morning Everyone

My we do have a lot of birthday parties going on.....:bday3:

Rebirth - My God what an ordeal you went through on Saturday! I really feel for you but boy are you tough to have poured it away :l I have just seen Mr G's post and it has make me think more about what you did. I agree it was symbolic and in a warped way you were testing yourself and the best part is that you passed the test!!!!

Paguy - Its so great to hear the male perspective, I think that 99% of relationship failures are down to non communication between us, if we could talk more we could save a lot of heartache.

Star - This description is just beautiful......

Stargazerlily;979097 wrote:
Cyn, I took a lovely half hour walk after the sun rose. It was misty and lovely out. I live by a small lake and a creek, and loved seeing the ducks and swans out in the early morning, just taking their time, enjoying their beautful universe.
.

Rusty - Im so happy this time Paris is going to be of good memories for you.

Im having dinner tonight my my good artist friend from London who has been such a great support to me recently and has even offered me his home here should I find myself homeless. I am truly blessed to have such great people in my life.

Wishing you all a wonderful Tuesday full of optimism

[dill]

October Optimism - Week 2

"When you see the value of continued growth, the circumstances around you become
stepping stones."
--Clyde M. Narrimore
Rebirth I could just picture you locked in battle and staring down that bottle. You showed heroic strength. Well done. I agree with G. Your

thinking is slowly shifting in the positive

My time is short this morning so I will just say a quick hello and wish all an AF Tuesday. October is moving along very quickly, eh?

[paguy]

October Optimism - Week 2

Good Morning Friends:

RB ? Wow. I think it?s fair to say that you really impressed all of us with your restraint. What I find amazing is that we still think of alcohol as a ?reward? and we are ?deserving? of it. This is such a common theme for many of us. I am just coming up on my 3 month milestone and I don?t think a week goes by when I don?t have these same feelings and thoughts. For me, I know that I have to be continually vigilant and mindful of these lurking thoughts. CONGRATULATIONS, RB on a job well done.

Well, after having our hot water tank replaced over the weekend, we had our heater furnace serviced yesterday to find out that mice had gotten into the furnace and destroyed a circuit board with their ?droppings?. So, now we have to address the vermin problem in our basement!

Work is very stressful at the moment. After months of budget cutting talks, I?ve been tasked with reducing my staff by 10. This is after I was tasked with reducing my staff by 20 earlier this year in January. Most of these people are long term employees who are good people and hard workers. This is absolutely the one part of working in management that I find so difficult to deal with. Yes, it has gotten easier because I have had to lay off staff every year for the past 6 years. Knowing that my decisions will determine who will be standing in the unemployment lines is almost heartbreaking for me. The saddest part for me is that I work for a healthcare corporation that espouses being all about quality and caring but simply put, the bottom line is all about profits and Wall Street.

Hope you all have a peaceful day, today??

[Choochie]

October Optimism - Week 2

RB, the point John makes is a good one about AL - that we think of the lack of it in terms of missing out on something. That's something I'm really working to change -- to think in terms of gaining something rather than losing something. It's hard but I'm hoping the longer I go without AL, the more I'll internalize that feeling.

John - so sorry you're having to lay people off. Depressing, I know. You're right, though - we are all about bottom line - wish it could be different.