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October Optimism - Week 3

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    #16
    October Optimism - Week 3

    Hi Coochie and welcome. Sometimes people just post here passing through, and I am really glad you are going to stay with us. I join the others in looking forward to your perspectives and discoveries. Tonight I just wanted to share a funny story since a number of us are stressed, angry, or afraid. Last night I was so exhausted, I finally was just spent, I could not even muster up a spot of worry and was heading to bed early when the doorbell rang. It was a friend I made in my Ph.D. program five million years ago, and while she is on the surface a rather shy, bookish, woman with cats, through the years I learned that she is also a closet cougar. It happens. Her boyfriend, referred to by me only and always as "Young Tom" is an artist, and it now seems that he additionally moonlights on occasion as a limo driver to make extra money. He had time to kill while his fare was at the symphony and was out in front my house on my little street in this enormous white car. She did not take no for an answer; in fact I don't think I actually said a word. So I am out the door mute with no shoes, no purse, no keys, dressed only in my underwear and an old Black Dog t-shirt and flying through town and out onto the highway. We hardly said a thing, just listened to an mix of opera, and when I got home, the world had somehow shifted back again into familiar territory. Not that riding around in a limo in my excuse for pajamas listening to Maria Callas is something I have ever done, but I felt unburdened. Never know when life will throw you a most surreal bone. Love and as Cyn would say "light", Ladybird.
    may we be well

    Comment


      #17
      October Optimism - Week 3

      Just popping into say good night as well!

      Rusty--I was going to ask if it's not being to noisy...what kind of "clients" you have? I always think about the kind of job I did at school when I came feeling less than 100%. Sadly, I got to the point where I knew exactly how much I could drink....even knew when I could start and when I needed to stop so I wouldn't feel like crap at work. Very rarely did I ever overdo it where I went in "hungover". 340 screaming kids in the gym at 7:45AM...you'll only do that experience hungover once!! :H The weekends or vacation times were the bad times for me!

      Star--do you get regular flu shots?? THey just started giving them here this week I think. We are noticing more and more kids are getting sick...and then of course it hits the teachers!!

      Lav-None of us would ever consider you whining!!! Silly!!! We are here for you and are genuinely (is that the right word I'm trying to spell??) concerned! WE REALLY CARE ABOUT YOU..in other words!!:l

      CHill--so glad the date went well!!! Yea...just being the "mom" here and asking the "mom" questions...not leavin out any juicy details are you?:H I'm kidding...I'm really glad you had a wonderful time!! I went to the last boys HS football game with my son...he's pretty dang cute too!! Anyway our team won 54-0...not much of a game...so we are headed off to Districts or Regionals or whatever now!!

      LBH--your evening so like so much fun!!! It reminds me of my best friend, Ryan from high school...we used to sit in his drive way in my mom's mini van and crank Phantom of the Opera as loud as we could and sing at the top of our lungs...yep...had exciting Friday nights even back then!! Of course I wasn't in my underwear...but it somehow just seemed like an escape for both of us for a little while....him because he was dealing with being gay and the turmoil it was causing in his family and me because I was just "sad"....not really understanding why...even back then. Your night to me sounds fantastic...sometimes...no words even need to be spoken to have a magical evening!

      Ok...I'm off to bed...but not before I play a little wii with the B-man!! We'll see everyone on the morning!! Good night all!
      SD
      "Do not follow where the path may lead. Go instead where there is no path and leave a trail."

      6/18/11--7/3/12
      7/29/12

      Comment


        #18
        October Optimism - Week 3

        Good morning everyone

        I really love this thread. I can identify with so many of you and you bring so much into my life. This morning it was smiles all around. Chill - I vaguely remember that dreamy feeling, hold onto it, its lovely. LBH - the thought of you flying around in a limo in all your finery will keep me smiling every time I think of it today. So thanks ladies for a lovely start to my day. I think todays readings apply!!!

        Life is for living, love is for sharing. Don't let the good things pass you by!
        --Sue

        The hardest thing to learn in life is which bridge to cross and which to burn.
        --David Russell

        "The secret of happiness is to count your blessings while others are adding up their
        troubles."
        --Unknown

        Off to drive my daughter as usual. Hope you all have a great Saturday.

        Rustop

        Comment


          #19
          October Optimism - Week 3

          Hiya all!

          Ah LBH, what a brilliant thing to happen, and in yer underwear and t-shirt? You are one cool momma!
          Bravo Chilli! It's nice to see you smilin'.
          Hang in there Rusty! There ARE good men around.

          A safe, sober, and magical weekend to everyone.

          'I am part of all that I have met, yet all experience is an arch wherethro', gleams that untravelled world whose margins fade, forever and forever when I move'

          Zen soul Warrior. Freedom today-

          Comment


            #20
            October Optimism - Week 3

            Good Morning again guys

            rustop61;982601 wrote:
            "The secret of happiness is to count your blessings while others are adding up their
            troubles."
            Rustop - I love this quote it reminds me of the saying "if everyone dumped their baggage in the street for all to see, you'd take a look at other peoples, grab you're own back up and run"

            Star - My heart really goes out to your Son, its must be so tough being young and not being able to get out there and socialize due to finances, especially when he doesnt have friends closeby already to even hang out with without spending money.

            Paguy - Woo hoo! Here's to happy dancing on Monday!!!

            Lav - Mr Lav has astounded me with his lastest take on things. I remember reading Eckhart Tolle saying that the quiet shy introverts are just as much egomanics as the showoff arrogant types. They think its all about "them". Im so sorry this has been the exasperating outcome to your ultimatum.

            Rusty - Make some room for one more on that beach in the South of France....

            Sooty - Im trusting you to get us all there....

            SD - whats your fav wii game? Im a big kid and although I've not got any myself I used to have a nintento 64 and I still have a gameboy.

            Mr G - Any new music for us to hear yet? (im not impatient, you can tell :H)

            After dinner last night we went to our local bar and there was a really good band playing which made me think of our G bloke. It was a great atmostphere, everyone was merry but nobody drunk. I then had the most awful sleep after going to bed at 2.30 I was awake until way after 4am and awake again at 7am. I was drinking slimline tonic all night, does anyone know if there is any stimulate in it? I have been trying to google it to find out but not having any luck.

            Have a wonderful Saturday everyone.......
            "In the depths of winter I finally learned there was in me an invincible summer ."
            AF - JAN 1st 2010
            NF - May 1996

            Comment


              #21
              October Optimism - Week 3

              Hi Chilli,

              You thought of me? :h New music in the making.

              I'm not sure about the slimline tonic, but i know if i have a longish night out at a bar, drinking ginger ale, or a soft drink now and then, my tummy feel's a bit gassy and unsettled later on. Your mind might've just been very err, stimulated :h. You know, your senses probably needed a couple of hours to unwind before you could sleep? Just some thought's. Yep, maybe there was some caffeine in there somewhere.....some af drinks are evil i reckon! :H

              off to bed here. Take care all!

              'I am part of all that I have met, yet all experience is an arch wherethro', gleams that untravelled world whose margins fade, forever and forever when I move'

              Zen soul Warrior. Freedom today-

              Comment


                #22
                October Optimism - Week 3

                Hello Friends:

                Saturday morning here and it looks like it?s going to be a nice brisk Fall weekend here in the mid-Atlantic states. I love this time of year. And tonight, our Philadelphia Phillies face the San Francisco Giants tonight to defend their National League Championship title ? GO PHILLIES!

                LBH ? What a wonderful tale about your impromptu limo ride ? I loved it! Isn?t it amazing how these unexpected opportunities can show up and add some sparkle to your life?

                Chill ? I agree with G ? I think you may have been a bit over-stimulated by the music and perhaps company :h that caused your restless sleep last night? Happy for you ? sounds like you had a nice time.

                rustop61;982601 wrote: "The secret of happiness is to count your blessings while others are adding up their troubles."
                Rustop ? Loved this quote. Yet another golden nugget I?ve picked up from you that I need to incorporate into my daily thoughts. Focusing on the negative aspects of life only makes us frustrated and bitter. By focusing on the positives, my outlook and perspective is always so much brighter.

                SD ? I really got a chuckle reading how you and your friend Ryan would crank up the volume and sing the tunes from Phantom of the Opera in your mom?s minivan! I wish I had a friend like you 30 years ago when I was coming out!!

                Coochie ? How are you coming along? Let us know how you are doing.

                Nothing major planned for this weekend other than getting myself psychologically adjusted to ?re-entry into the world of full mobility?. Although the doctor told me that I would have swelling in my foot for 6-months, I can feel that the swelling has come done considerably over the past week or so and I think my foot is ready for re-rntry!

                I do need to convince Mr. Partner to give the dog a bath this weekend as he (the dog, not the partner) is beginning to get a little ?stinky?. I can?t get a groomers appointment for a couple of weeks so a home bath is definitely in order for the little guy.

                Hope you all have a pleasant and restful Saturday?. Attached files [img]/converted_files/1398194=5733-attachment.gif[/img]
                John
                AF since 7/13/2010

                Comment


                  #23
                  October Optimism - Week 3

                  GM all!

                  Just jumping in to say hello. EB will be here shortly to spend the day wit me

                  If the YB shows up I think I'm just going to ignore him.........tired of the BS.

                  Enjoy your day kids!
                  Lav
                  AF since 03/26/09
                  NF since 05/19/09
                  Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

                  Comment


                    #24
                    October Optimism - Week 3

                    Hi Everyone,

                    Just your most recent "recruit" checking in to brag about being 12 days AF Thanks to everyone -- you know that you are huge inspirations -- so happy that you guys take the time to communicate and keep us newbies "in tow."

                    I've been posting on a lot of other threads but am committed to being AF, so will start coming here regularly. Feeling super.

                    LBH - thanks for your warm welcome; Chill - so hoping for good things with your new "guy."

                    Paguy - thanks for asking about my "status." Just wanted to share my latest excitement: I'm reading a book that was recommended on this site - called First Year Sober. I can't tell if it's going to be good yet, but picked up a term a I love, love, love. The author talks about "miraculous consciousness" at the beginning of the book. As I posted on another thread - this really hit me. I think about how when drinking - I would be numb for hours every evening and then in a fog until at least noon the next day and how now I'm fully present - "conscious" -- the opposite of "unconscious" which is really what goes on with drinking -- escaping reality and the price paid for all that goes with being unconscious. Anyway - just another way to think about/look at this whole process which "speaks" to me.

                    Paguy - not up on what's going on with your foot but will now follow - wishing you a quick recovery.

                    To all the rest of you wonderful people - I am now on this "team" and hope to start keeping up with everyone.

                    Hugs,
                    Choochie

                    Hugs,
                    Choochie

                    Comment


                      #25
                      October Optimism - Week 3

                      Good Morning all my fabbie optimers!!

                      Very cool but clearing day here in MA. No snow Lav thank god but I hear Burlington, VT got a FOOT of the white stuff!!:egad: OK, Green Mountains are out of the picture!! No ocean anyway. To my dismay I actually had to turn the heat on last nite!! Thermostat said 60 degrees in the house when I got home!

                      I am absolutely facinated by the Kharmic happenings to some of you. LBH-just when things looked darkest and you had to give the dreaded ultimatum to Lord BH, a friend and her boy toy show up out of the blue and take you for a Magical Mystery Tour!! (do ya like that reference Mr. G??). Chill, just when you are being thrust into the abyss of uncertainty regarding finances, food and shelter, a knight in White Satin(hee hee!!) pops out of no where to steal your heart. BTW, it was :h not caffeine that kept you up last nite silly girl!!

                      I truly believe that we all get what we deserve-sometimes we have to be the Captain and navigate a certain path in order to get there-sometimes a force greater than ourselves takes over the helm for a while. Enjoy!!

                      John-I'm so excited for you on your anticipated freedom Monday!! Now PLEASE don't overdue it!! We want to cheer you on in a marathon sometime next year!! Hope the bath goes OK for little doggie and partner.

                      Rustop-thanks for the quotes. They were awesome!!

                      Big happy shoutout to SD, Star, Sped, RB, Rusty, G, Choochie and anyone else stopping by on this wonderful Saturday!!

                      :l

                      Last nite a friend and I went to see Victoria Stillwell (It's Me or the Dog). She was fabulous and I could have listened to her speak for hours and hours. Her videos were clips of past shows but she was able to slow some of footage down so we could see some of the communication going on with dog and dog or dog/owner. Facinating!! Not a huge surprise to find out she was a professional actor before becoming a dog trainer and she also has quite the voice as well! One of the pivotal experiences she had was becoming a member of the Guardian Angels in London (she was much much bigger then-almost unrecognizable). It was that experience that taught her the magic of staying calm and quiet and of non force in order to diffuse a difficult situation. It flowed beautifully over to her new career as dog trainer. The catalyst for her TV show was that she was sitting home one day with her new infant watching SuperNanny. She had been training for 6 years with the likes of Karen Pryor etc and she said-"I could do that sort of show with dogs!!". So she wrote the producer of SuperNanny and "It's Me or the Dog" was born (the title came from a client of hers who was so fed up with her dog's behavior she actually said that to Victoria)
                      For this trip she partnered up with the local humane society and brought out different dogs up for adoption to demo certain behaviors. Very cute!!
                      I did break down and bought her book and wanted to get it signed after the show but the line was humungous and my friend wasn't feeling well so home we went.
                      When I got home I decided to go into super calm mode and not get upset with the "welcome home" bullying behavior DD usually exhibits. In fact, I kept him in his room until the other 2 were safely outside and I ignored him when he barked and jumped at me. Praised him as soon as he was quiet and let him out. Hmmm, not sure there was a big difference in his behavior but I sure felt better!! Oh and Victoria said that contary to popular belief Dogs are not out to achieve world domination (veiled reference I think to another famous trainer!!)
                      Thoroughly enjoyed myself obviously but it was a very late nite and I too didn't sleep very well. But I was AF so not hungover today and happily (not) at work now.
                      New Birthday: May 8, 2010

                      "Because dwelling from, not upon, the space you want to inherit is the fastest way to change absolutely everything."[/i]-The Universe

                      KO the Beast!!

                      Comment


                        #26
                        October Optimism - Week 3

                        Hmm John you intrigue me..You said you were coming out about 30 years ago.So that meant you use to date women before right? Reason why I am asking is that I think one of my exes is a closet gay but he wont admit it.

                        Chill! I really hope you two hook up by the end of this year!!

                        Lav the words you put into my head. LOL. I am thing duckhead now.

                        LBH HEY! Thats what I call fun!! I need some of that spontaneous fun in my life. Sigh.

                        A warm hello to rusty, rustop, sped, dill, choochie, sd, guitarista,P3 and anyone else I have missed out.
                        xx
                        Be strong-
                        We define ourselves by the best that is in us, not the worse that has been done to us.
                        Be constructive. Clear the word of CAN'T

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                          #27
                          October Optimism - Week 3

                          RB - Actually, now that I think about it, I came out when I was 21 so that was 35 years ago - HOW CAN I BE THIS OLD?? :H

                          I only dated casually when I was in high school. I was very popular for prom dates. I was quite the looker back then but perhaps I was popular because the girls felt 'safe' with me. I wasn't putting any pressure on them to do me any 'special favors' to be their prom date!! :H:H
                          John
                          AF since 7/13/2010

                          Comment


                            #28
                            October Optimism - Week 3

                            paguy;982915 wrote: RB - Actually, now that I think about it, I came out when I was 21 so that was 35 years ago - HOW CAN I BE THIS OLD?? :H
                            :H:H
                            :H:H:H
                            56 is the new 30!!! Doesnt time fly eh!

                            Well I have had a long day at work so its time for a curry and x factor! Have a lovely saturday night my virtual friends.

                            Be good. x
                            Be strong-
                            We define ourselves by the best that is in us, not the worse that has been done to us.
                            Be constructive. Clear the word of CAN'T

                            Comment


                              #29
                              October Optimism - Week 3

                              Hi Everyone, had a busy day today so just logging on briefly before I give my daughter a lift to her babysitting.

                              Chill I will definitely drive the bus to the South of France - we'll have a ball.

                              Lav keep strong lovely lady, I am so sorry that Mr L is giving you a hard time.

                              I too love the karma - just when you feel low someone whisks you away in your scruffy clothes to ride in a limo - fabulous! LBH tell me were there any carrots ?

                              I gotta go now gang, got my 2nd meditation course tomorrow and really looking forward to it. Will let you know how it went tomorrow night.

                              Have a great weekend everyone
                              love Sooty

                              Comment


                                #30
                                October Optimism - Week 3

                                Rusty, Welcome Home! It’s good to have you back Stateside once again! Thank you for your caring words regarding my brothers. I pray you don’t face such loss for a long time to come, but don’t underestimate your ability to get through it AF. You would do it to honor them, I am sure.

                                Paguy, allow us all to join you in your “Happy Wobble” on Monday. I’m so happy for you getting your cast off!

                                Star, thank you for your comforting words. I like to think we are reunited with our loved ones when we pass. I find it a comforting thought.

                                SD, Mr. Dill and I have not been fishing together on Lake Erie, although he has with his friends. The thing is that last year Mr. Dill and I bought a 23 foot, 1985 Searay. We have never owned a boat before, so this is all new to us. This past summer we docked it at a local lake about an hour from here called Indian Lake. But we decided we would like to be more adventurous and dock it up on Lake Erie. That is a 3 hour drive from here, but that won’t be a problem because the boat has a cabin and we can sleep in it! We went up to Lake Erie on Friday to look for a nice place to dock it for next summer. I think we found one. It’s a really nice Marina. I grew up very near Lake Erie and being up in that area feels “like home” to me. I am really excited about this new adventure.

                                Speaking of adventures, LBH, yours was a delight to us all. Thank you for the ride! Aren’t you glad that you were AF and ready for anything?! I had to think a moment why Sooty was mixing carrots into the story, but then I remembered your pool story from last summer which can only be yours to re tell if you wish.

                                Sooty, how about we trade in this old bus for a limo?

                                Lav, you chart us a course for a great get away and we’ll all be along on a magical tour. Forget all the stress and sorrows for a while.

                                Rustop, I am loving your quotes. Thanks, and keep them coming! “The hardest thing to learn in life is which bridge to cross and which to burn.” I thought about that one for a while. In this struggle with alcohol, many’s the time I have known which one to burn but have had a hell of a time lighting the match.

                                Papmom, very interesting about Victoria Stillwell. Once again I am learning something I knew nothing about. What a diverse and interesting group we have on this thread.

                                Choochi, I, like LBH, am glad you are not just passing through, but have decided to take up residence. It is so wonderful to share the awakening of consciousness with you. I remember how amazed I was in the beginning of this journey to find how much of life I was losing in that bottle. I absolutely love going to bed sober and able to remember my evenings. Stay with us.

                                Greetings Rebirth, Sped, Cyn, G and all who stop in.
                                Dill

                                Dont forget, you can: start late, start over, be unsure, try and fail AND STILL SUCCEED!

                                If it is important to you, you will find a way. If not, you will find an excuse.

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