Weekly AA thread - Nov. 1 - Nov. 7

[retteacher]

I'll be right back. Mary

[retteacher]

Weekly AA thread - Nov. 1 - Nov. 7

Everyone: All is well here.

Rebirth: I just read the end of last week's thread. I'm sorry about the relapse, but today is a new day, & you can start over. If you have a big book, there are sections in the beginning that are about relapse. Bill W. actually seems to imply that they can actually stengthen our resolve. Yes, you're going to have to tell your sponsor. She'll know what you will have to do in order to get back on track. I wouldn't worry about her judging you, because in my experience, I've never seen that. I've seen multiple-time relapsers welcomed back into the fold like nothing had ever happened. I haven't relapsed since joining AA, but before that I would accumulate time & then relapse (quite a few times). It was discouraging, but I never gave up wanting to get sober. I know for sure that I cannot drink moderately, because every time I relapsed, I drank more heavily than ever before. I've also heard people in meetings say that shortly after the onset of the relapse, they were again drinking heavily or even more heavily than before. It seems that you know in your heart that you might not be able to drink moderately as much as you'd like to. When I feel weak, upset, or in some sort of conflict, I try to get to meetings & speak openly about what's going on. To me that's the only antidote to drinking. In going through this health crisis w/my daughter, I know that if I didn't have meetings, phone calls, literature, etc., I would have gotten drunk. I know I would have. I could never have toughed this out on my own.

Anyhow, pick yourself up & dust yourself off & start your program all over.

Mary

[Doggygirl]

Weekly AA thread - Nov. 1 - Nov. 7

Rebirth, what Mary said. :l I hope you have dusted yourself off now. I know you said you can't get to a meeting today - can you tomorrow?

No meetings for me yesterday or today. I will be READY tomorrow morning.

I went to the hospital today to see homeless friend. He was still heavily sedated and asleep - still in ICU with breathing tues and all manner of other stuff hooked up to him. I talked to him in hopes he somehow knows that people care about him. The nurse told me that they tested his breathing yesterday without the help of the respirator and "he did great." So that means a couple more days, and he will be outa there. I pray to God that the hospital social worker tries to get him into a rehab somewhere. It's so difficult for the homeless/penniless.

I went looking for one of my other homeless friends - the one with the dog. I found him on the first try - that seemed like divine intervention as he moves around a huge area. He also went up to the hospital to visit over the weekend. He rarely leaves his dog alone for even a few minutes so I know that visiting the other guy was really important to him to leave his dog and his bike/trailer with all his earlthy belongings (but especially the dog) outside.

My heart just breaks for the ones who are still suffering, and who have lost everything - literally. Especially with winter coming on. I am so grateful I am sober today.

A few of us are going to Step Coaches house to have a meeting with him on Wednesday night. I'm starting to feel like I need to be living the AA life away from the tables as much as around the tables. Applying these principles to all my affairs.

DG

[rebirth]

Weekly AA thread - Nov. 1 - Nov. 7

DG I really do not know how you do this job. But thank God you do. Someone out there has to care.

Mary and DG thank you both for your great advice. Really, truely appreciate it. I sent a text to my sponsor an hour ago explaining that I have slipped but stopped drinking as of today and that I want to stay stopped. I told her that I need to get started on my step work more than ever. Hopefully she will respond. But if she doesnt I will just move on and focus on getting well again..

I feel very lucky that I dont feel compelled to drink myself to oblivion today. It was what I was dreading the most if I relapsed..that it would take months of heavy drinking to make myself stop again. Five months of sobriety has shown me how much better life is without the drink. ..AA has shown me that I can live without AL.

I am really looking forward to my next stage in recovery.

I am so grateful to be sober today. I say that with ALL of my heart.

[rebirth]

Weekly AA thread - Nov. 1 - Nov. 7

Aw bless. My sponsor has returned my text. She still wants to meet me to do step work and even signed it with a kiss.

[Doggygirl]

Weekly AA thread - Nov. 1 - Nov. 7

rebirth;994531 wrote: Aw bless. My sponsor has returned my text. She still wants to meet me to do step work and even signed it with a kiss.

The steps are the way up and out of the quagmire. See??? All will be fine. Onward.

DG

[rebirth]

Weekly AA thread - Nov. 1 - Nov. 7

Yes..all will be fine. I feel it in my bones.

Right . Gonna read from the big book and get my AA fix. Goodnight all. x

[Doggygirl]

Weekly AA thread - Nov. 1 - Nov. 7

Good night rebirth. You are doing the right things. Good things will come.

DG

[retteacher]

Weekly AA thread - Nov. 1 - Nov. 7

I just got back from a small women's meeting that I sometimes go to. Talk about relapsing:
-one woman (who had led the meeting last week) picked up a 24 hr coin.
-one woman whom I've seen around a lot is back to less than a week in terms of time.
-one woman who I had seen pick up her 11 month coin relapsed recently.

The important thing about all of these stories is that they were at a meeting & are picking up their program & moving forward. It isn't easy. I'm still focussing on the first step, admitting that I am powerless over alcohol regardless of the fact that I didn't sink as low as some folks in the program. I can still get that "Maybe I wasn't so bad" type of denial.

Mary

[Cherbear]

Weekly AA thread - Nov. 1 - Nov. 7

Rebirth!! PHew!!! My heart started pounding hard reading about your relapse , You and I are in this for the long haul!! Remember if you can't be honest and open then the drink will be in our hand, I truely believe that is what is helping me stay sober and working the steps.!!! Yay for you for opening up to us and your sponsor. You know what your priority needs to be. I am scared of relapse too! I know because before I joined AA I was constantly relapsing!! and that is what was so demoralizing! AA is so supportive, relapse or no relapse, remember we all love you no matter what and we know what its like to want to drink!! Its such a damn battle sometimes, but I know now that the battle isn't as constant.

Starve the monster!!

One day at a time, one hour at a time. reach out.

I have to start step 8!! ugh.

[rebirth]

Weekly AA thread - Nov. 1 - Nov. 7

DG, Mary and Cher
Just want to say thank you for your wonderful support.You guys are wonderful and I need your posts to keep me sober. xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

I feel so emotional today as I had such a lucky escape and I am so happy because of this.

Have a great sober Tuesday!

[Doggygirl]

Weekly AA thread - Nov. 1 - Nov. 7

Hi all. Rebirth, good to have you here. Beats the alternative, eh? Cherbear, it is very freeing to start clearing the wreckage with others. At least it was that way for me, and I hope it's that way for you too!

I talked to Step Coach's wife last night and it seems he will likely not be with us much longer. The cancer is spreading very rapidly and they are doing things now to make his end of life more comfortable. I am sad for sure. I feel so blessed that he is part of my recovery.

DG

[gyco]

Weekly AA thread - Nov. 1 - Nov. 7

good morning all,havent been here for a while,nice to see all is somwhat gooodl,lapses and relapses,rebirth it is not the end of the world,and yes the 5 months you have under[not had]is still there,the gain of understanding where your alchoholism can take you is of the most priority,whether you mod which many dont hav the option,or total sobriety,ive been in and out of AA for 12 years,ive never been not welcom back,plus as many said theyve never met anyone there that didnt belong,whether they get the 1st part of the 1st step or not,saying one is alchoholic is a big step,admiiting poerlessnes is a bigger one,the rest of the steps come in leaps and bounds,i wsh you well,remember theres no such a thing as failure gyco

[retteacher]

Weekly AA thread - Nov. 1 - Nov. 7

Hi Everyone:

I'm doing OK & going to as many meetings as possible in spite of a crazy schedule. I absolutely know how vulnerable I am. I will never, ever take my sobriety for granted. It's the most precious thing I have & my top priority. Nothing else is possible if I am drinking. I know this for sure.

Mary

[rebirth]

Weekly AA thread - Nov. 1 - Nov. 7

Hi Gyco. Thanks for your message. Its a new stage in recovery for me and i intend to be stronger this time. Admitting powerlessness over alcohol is something that I thought I had admitted but it's clear that I havnt. something i really need to work on.

DG I am really sorry for your sadness. I am really sorry for Step Coach...It's very sad.:l

Hi Mary.