AF Daily - Monday November 15

[Accountable for Me]

AF Daily - Monday November 15

greeneyes;1004146 wrote: Phew! I got got past a big sobby, boo-hoo, valueless life, regret filled phone call from my dad. My mouth hangs open in amazement at how our relationship plays out. Think I'll drag out a smudge stick. Need to smooth my feathers down. That was unsettling.

:l:l:l:l:l, Greenie.

[Brigitte Bardot]

AF Daily - Monday November 15

AFM..that would piss me off too. If you're working all weekend and there's somebody home, atleast they can do is pick up their trail of disaster as they make it.

Hey Greenie, I was getting those guilt trip, horrible gut wrenching calls from my future ex-MIL..I no longer call her anymore since every phone call would end with me opening a bottle of red and no good came from that. I now send thank you cards when presents are sent from them for Little Gia, I'm not participating in the drama bullshit anymore with them.

[greeneyes]

AF Daily - Monday November 15

BB, what's amazing is all I felt was compassion and empathy and the desire to help him shift his thinking while allowing him to express it and get through it. I'm so pleased at that - truly a feeling befitting a queen. :H Pleased, but still unsettled.

[LVT25]

AF Daily - Monday November 15

Hello friends,

Phew! I don't even know where to start! I started on today's thread, and then realized I better go catch up on yesterday's thread and Holy Moly--7 pages! Awesome! There is no way I can remember everything and everyone I want to comment on! (I'll leave that to the young DG who obviously has a mind like a steel trap!

I have had a few instances where I've either been asked or maybe pressured a little to have "just one". I totally agree with Greenie regarding the question could I maintain my sobriety with a few sips? Probably, but why would I even consider a few sips (I didn't drink for taste)? And by sips, I'm thinking just enough to swirl the taste buds not so much a swallow as a sip. Not a chance I'd be willing to take. Think on a cellular memory level. Think about clinical allergy testing. Why risk that possibility of a reactive experience? Plus the thought of it making me sick, makes me sick.

Also this really really nails it for me too from DG--key for me was somehow finding a moment of clarity when I see alcohol for what it really is (toxic and unecessary), and then HANG ON to that moment of clarity for dear life. Alcohol is so over rated in our society, and it is addictive, that is why it is so hard to let it go.

I kind of feel like my emotions are right there at the surface right now. I could cry at the drop of a hat. I guess it is all the stuff going on with Terry, and also #1 son is dealing with some stuff at school that I feel partially responsible for. I want to MAKE him do what I feel is the right thing, but I'm not sure that is the right thing...you know. So I've asked some friends for advice, and I've thought about it and talked to my son and given him my advice. Rather than jump in myself and get too involved, I'm going to let him try to handle it and hope and pray that is the right decision. I'm also praying for guidance and to let go and trust that it will work out like it's suppose to without me getting in there and trying to fix it. How's that sound, Greenie???
#2 son is sick with sore throat, stuffy head and fever. Now I get to decide to we go to doctor or let it run its course. He had strep throat in September--hope its not that again!

Time to get busy, I told a friend I'd deliver "Meals on Wheels" today. I like doing that, something about helping others helps to put things into perspective.

Keep up the great work everybody. Even if you're feeling "Stabby" that is natural. Stay off the smokes AFM--you won't regret it!!:l:l:l:h
Have a great sober week all!:h

P.S. Sorry Greenie, that your dad is having a rough time. Stay strong. I would but a hug here, but I'm over my limit. So HUGS!!

[peacenik]

AF Daily - Monday November 15

morning kids!

i find that it is easier to just not drink at all for me. i just can't have 1-2 glasses of wine, whats' the point!? (that's my head talking, not a condemnation!). also it is freeing to just not think about it (unless of course i'm having a craving , then that is all i think about while i whiteknuckle through the feeling). i feel relaxed when my husband goes into the kitchen searching through the cupboards for a snack, knowing he won't find an old empty i stashed away, and i feel at ease when someone else in the family takes out the garbage because i know there won't be any loud "clangs" of wine bottles in the bag.
i feel liberated by choosing not to drink everyday.

i ramble
40 DAYS!!!??? woohoo! i love christmas. my family makes alot of gifts and we eat a big feast so it is fun and not stressful. we don't spend much money on the holiday, and i like that. on christmas eve we gather to remember my mama, who died onchristmas eve...it will be 5 years this year.

anyway, i know i won't drink today!

have a gorgeous sober day all.

[peacenik]

AF Daily - Monday November 15

morning lv, hang in there...at least you are sober and functioning. i am thinking of you and your sister.

[greeneyes]

AF Daily - Monday November 15

LVT25;1004168 wrote: Rather than jump in myself and get too involved, I'm going to let him try to handle it and hope and pray that is the right decision. I'm also praying for guidance and to let go and trust that it will work out like it's suppose to without me getting in there and trying to fix it. How's that sound, Greenie???

Perfecto! Seriously, what else can you do? IMHO you have done what you need to do and he needs to make the decisions and reap the rewards or suffer the consequences. I also honor the pain you must be feeling over this process. :l:l back to you.

[ItsJustMe]

AF Daily - Monday November 15

Mornin All!

Rainy day here in GA (aka God?s country)?.

I had about forgot what rain looked like it has been so long. Just zooming in to do a quick check since I am already at work and have a truck load to do today. I will read and post more later.

First and for most. This is DAY 30 AL FREE FOR ME!!!!!! Yea Me! I rock! I?m a Stud-muffin. Freaking awesome!!!!!!! Yea, I am tooting my own horn and loving it. I have not been 30 days AL free in at least 10 years!!!! NOT ONCE!!!! I totally feel great like there is nothing I can?t accomplish. What a feeling! I owe a great deal of it to all of you!

Ok, just had to get that out of my system.

Greenie ? I know it?s early in the morning but did you tell me to ?Feck off???? I am shocked and feel so abused ? language from such an upstanding lady?. :H :H :H I didn?t make it to the gym yesterday. However I have a better chance today. I packed my gym bag this morning and put it in my truck. The gym is between my office and home. I also made me a ?running playlist? on my iPhone. So at least the planets are aligned for that it to happen.

DG ? Thanks for your unsolicited reminder. :moon: My checking account moaned as I read that. No matter what budget I set it gets blown every single year.

BB ? I have been a bad influence on you? ?commando bat balls?????

Ok, gotta get to work now and make some customers happy.

Talk at ya this evening!

ItsJustMe
AF since 10/16/10

[greeneyes]

AF Daily - Monday November 15

peacenik;1004172 wrote: on christmas eve we gather to remember my mama, who died onchristmas eve...it will be 5 years this year.

How lovely, peace! Mine died 6 years ago tomorrow. I buried her ashes on my birthday. For me, it makes my birthday all that more special.

[greeneyes]

AF Daily - Monday November 15

:rockon: GA boy!!! No boogars for you!!

Gym bag in the car, eh? I'll try that.

[choppersmom]

AF Daily - Monday November 15

Good Morning Abbers!! Happy Monday to one and all. This thread is very busy this morning. I'm going to have to read back later this afternoon when I can process the all the information. I'm still in weekend mode, and I have not had enough coffee :H

Thanks for the reminder of only 40 shopping days DG! I'm behind this year on Christmas, plus I'm going on vacation during that time. I need to get moving. I soooo love Christmas.

Sorry this is so short. I just wanted to say hello and wish everyone a great, sober day! I'll be back later when my brain is functioning :H

Hugs to you all,

:l Chops

[Doggygirl]

AF Daily - Monday November 15

Hello again all!

Rusty;1004057 wrote: Last year at this time, I woke up on Monday morning and with all the empty champagne bottles, it looked like a party at The Betty Ford Center that had gone awry.:H


Sounds like a B movie. One Flew Over Rusty's Nest. :H

Gaia;1004052 wrote: On another website there was a discussion in mindset and being AF. There is a very articulate woman who wrote about the idea of having a few sips of wine after being 2 years AF. The question is, can you maintain your sobriety even after having a little because your mindset is firmly commited to being AF?
I think this implies that if one has a strong enough WILL to drink in a controlled fashion, then one can do it. I think this has been proven wrong for the vast majority of people time and time again. If this woman decides to try it, let us know how it goes. Maybe she will be a one in a zillion exception. I know I tried a thousand ways from Sunday to drink in a controlled fashion and I personally can't do it. I don't think the historical evidence points to that. (with the possible exception of med support such Topomax, which is at the heart of the MWO moderation option)

I am reminded of Marshy's post yesterday about alcohol being an addictive drug similar to heroin or cocaine. If someone was 2 years clean from either of those, and then said "if my will to stay clean is strong enough, I can shoot up just a small amount and then stay clean" we would probably call them CRAZY. At least I know I would. I view my addiction as being highly similar to that. Not nearly as similar to a weekend affair or over eating cake. (although I'll tell ya - for me this sugar thing is probably closer to heroin than it is to a weekend affair too, but I digress!) That's my two cents on it anyway.

Brigitte Bardot;1004080 wrote: It was nice knowing that eachtime my parents called with an update that I was not drinking (which would have been the case over a month ago now) and I was sober. That felt great for me.


Congrats Gia! That is awesome. I know a night alone used to be a great reason for me to drink.

greeneyes;1004084 wrote: I have a serious pile of paperwork to tackle today. There is a foo-foo open house for some friends real estate extravaganza tonight. They are marketing some downtown loft apartments they built. I do hope it is successful for them. It'll be interesting to mix with the well-to-do crowd.

They probably have no idea how fortunate they are to have the opportunity for an audience with the QUEEN!!! There is a glamor smilie at the figure skating forum that we desparately need here just for you Greenie.

Choochie;1004095 wrote: One thing is for sure.................No_______________way.

Hi Chooch! :H You are taking "say it with a smilie" to a whole new level. Say it with a non-smilie smilie! Love your positive vibe today!!!

Accountable for Me;1004134 wrote: G'mornin' all!

Feeling a bit STABBY this morning. I want to kick BF in his bat-balls. __________ lazy arse!:H

That is good "saying it with a non-smilie smilie" too. For me, the edginess of not smoking started to ease up a bit around 100 days. FWIW... Who is it again that introduced us to the fine word "Stabby?" And where is she these days? It was a dog loving person, right?

IJM, congrats on 30 days! Just in case you didn't see your cheer thread, I will say it again here. Go to the gym today or eat my boogers. I still have that jar you know.

[Sarasmiles]

AF Daily - Monday November 15

Hello Abbers! It's been great to read through today's posts and feel inspired and understood! I really appreciate the feedback on the issue of that nagging voice saying "go ahead and have an occasional drink...you can handle it." So far today the voice is quiet, and all I'm hearing is the logic in the words of all you Ab-Fabbers who've been there, done that! I had a great work out at the gym, walked with the dog in the woods and am soon to shower and get in to my office for an hour or two before picking kids up at school. Exercise is definitely playing a role in keeping me sober...I never want to drink on a day when I've had a serious run or workout, and planning exercise for the morning motivates me at night. The image of alcohol as poison is a useful one. Here I am working hard at being healthy in every other way; it's ludicrous to think of taking poison.

Have a great day, everyone!

Sara

[Raven.joy]

AF Daily - Monday November 15

The big difference doggy between alc and cocaine/heroin in that context is the social acceptance with drink. It's everywhere, work mates, neighbours, family. People with out alcoholic experience don't seem to understand why we can never have just one and we are constantly offered it by normal people in normal situations. It is why we need each others support and to remind each other we should never lose our fear of drink and where it takes us.

[Lavande]

AF Daily - Monday November 15

Lav thinks:

If you know you have an addictive personality....
then don't test it!!!!

When I think back to the 100 times I quit smoking over the years, the hell I put myself through each time.........
Weeks or months down the line I would fall victim to the junkie voice saying......it's OK now to have just one. YEAH, RIGHT!

That's why when I quit drinking I knew (especially after the first 30 days) that I HAD to remain AF & learn to ignore the junkie voice. When I quit smoking this time I knew it had to be the last time. How many times can a person put herself through this craziness????

It IS poison Sara, really!

Raven we have to keep telling ourselves - Nope, I don't drink anymore

I'll have to wait a few days to get chickie outside pics - rain moving in now. Looks like most of them were out a while ago. Now I have to go talk to them about NOT staying out in the rain.......