Aaaaaargh what a crap day!! Feel bloody awful, soooo tired and stressed and not yet feeling as full of vitality post-alcohol as I'd expected. Came very close to buying a bottle of bubbly!!!
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AF Daily - Monday November 15
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AF Daily - Monday November 15
Aaaaaargh what a crap day!! Feel bloody awful, soooo tired and stressed and not yet feeling as full of vitality post-alcohol as I'd expected. Came very close to buying a bottle of bubbly!!!Sober since 2nd November 2010!
"Life is a mirror of your thoughts and beliefs. It simply reflects YOUR truth, your reality."sigpic
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AF Daily - Monday November 15
Thanks Choochie. Gonna try to hang in there. Have posted about what's going on, here: https://www.mywayout.org/community/f9...bit-46216.htmlSober since 2nd November 2010!
"Life is a mirror of your thoughts and beliefs. It simply reflects YOUR truth, your reality."sigpic
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AF Daily - Monday November 15
BTC, there are a lot of bad therapists and it certainly sounds like you found one of them. I would definitely move on.
I am so sorry about your childhood situation. I cannot even imagine having lived through something on that level. Have you found a new therapist to help you? It seems like you'll have to have someone help you work through all that and put it in a place so you can move on with your life. I am truly so sorry. And regarding your mother, I would just think of her as your egg donor. Doesn't sound like a mother to me - I would have nothing to do with her. But then I don't know your whole life's story, so there may be some reason you're keeping her in your life?? Sounds like she wouldn't be willing to get counseling if she thinks she did nothing wrong. That's monstrous in my books.
Anyway, I hope you can find a way to cope. My heart goes out to you.:l
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AF Daily - Monday November 15
Thank you again Choochie. I've got a consultation with a new therapist on Wednesday. I also might start calling my mother The Egg Donor! (and to answer your question the only reason I still have her in my life is coz I am stoooooopid)Sober since 2nd November 2010!
"Life is a mirror of your thoughts and beliefs. It simply reflects YOUR truth, your reality."sigpic
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AF Daily - Monday November 15
BTC, hard to give up one's mother, but f*!#!! I can't imagine being able to be in the same room with someone who did that to me. I really hope your new therapist can give you some tools to help you figure out what to do with the egg donor!!:l
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AF Daily - Monday November 15
Choochie;1004415 wrote: BTC, hard to give up one's mother, but f*!#!! I can't imagine being able to be in the same room with someone who did that to me. I really hope your new therapist can give you some tools to help you figure out what to do with the egg donor!!:l
Joke!:H
How are you today?Sober since 2nd November 2010!
"Life is a mirror of your thoughts and beliefs. It simply reflects YOUR truth, your reality."sigpic
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AF Daily - Monday November 15
Raven.joy;1004297 wrote: The big difference doggy between alc and cocaine/heroin in that context is the social acceptance with drink. It's everywhere, work mates, neighbours, family. People with out alcoholic experience don't seem to understand why we can never have just one and we are constantly offered it by normal people in normal situations. It is why we need each others support and to remind each other we should never lose our fear of drink and where it takes us.
That is an interesting point Raven. Mr. Doggy had a horrendous pot addiction (and yes, it may not be addictive for everyone, like AL, but for some it is and he was one - can we say "co-dependent??" Anyway...). We share the same sobriety date. We have talked about how it is different for him as there are no neon lights on every block advertising pot, etc. And people aren't smoking it in public places, etc. He was metal detecting one day in the early spring, and came across a bag ont he ground. When he came home, he said "now I know how you must feel every time you go to the grocery store!" LOL - I'm more desensitized than that, but it sure did illustrate a point.
breaking_the_cycle;1004365 wrote: Aaaaaargh what a crap day!! Feel bloody awful, soooo tired and stressed and not yet feeling as full of vitality post-alcohol as I'd expected. Came very close to buying a bottle of bubbly!!!
No drinking here. I'm flossed and glossed and ready for Mary Kay training. New foundations are being introduced in January and I 'm hoping we are getting a preview tonight!
One thing is for sure....I don't want to eat boogers so there will be no al for me today.
DGSobriety Date = 5/22/08
Nicotine Free Date = 2/27/07
One day at a time.
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AF Daily - Monday November 15
BTC, I'm doing fine, thanks! Pretty calm waters on my end. Just trying to stay AF for good! I read a lot here - spend way too much time on this website. But, I think it's helping me. Hope you can work through this shit and stay alcohol free. I think numbing yourself just isn't the answer. I've been trying it for a long time. I love waking up feeling great in the mornings - haven't had that for decades (literally)!
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AF Daily - Monday November 15
Doggygirl;1004485 wrote: That is an interesting point Raven. Mr. Doggy had a horrendous pot addiction (and yes, it may not be addictive for everyone, like AL, but for some it is and he was one - can we say "co-dependent??" Anyway...). We share the same sobriety date. We have talked about how it is different for him as there are no neon lights on every block advertising pot, etc. And people aren't smoking it in public places, etc. He was metal detecting one day in the early spring, and came across a bag ont he ground. When he came home, he said "now I know how you must feel every time you go to the grocery store!" LOL - I'm more desensitized than that, but it sure did illustrate a point.
I am so sorry for what you went through. I'm glad you are looking for a new therapist. Sometimes I tend to think that medical professionals are all gods or something. Truth is, they are just like people in any other profession and some are better than others. I have a very dear friend who is a psychologist specializing in working with victims of child abuse (sexual or otherwise). She has shared with me that a childhood is totally robbed when there is abuse involved. Her goal is to help people not have their "today" and their future robbed as well. I think it is a huge positive step for you to stop numbing out and try to sort through it. I hope you continue to work towards the good life that you DESERVE rather than have the past haunt you forever. I can't even imagine how horrible it must have been for you.
No drinking here. I'm flossed and glossed and ready for Mary Kay training. New foundations are being introduced in January and I 'm hoping we are getting a preview tonight!
One thing is for sure....I don't want to eat boogers so there will be no al for me today.
DG
Eat boogers?!!!Sober since 2nd November 2010!
"Life is a mirror of your thoughts and beliefs. It simply reflects YOUR truth, your reality."sigpic
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AF Daily - Monday November 15
Wow, Just got in from work and read through this thread today. Y'all have been very, very busy.
Congrats on 30 Days ItsJustMe
You are a Stud Muffin for Sure
All of this talk about taking a sip of alcohol...wow. If I did that, I would be so disappointed in myself.
Off to get in my jammies.
M3AF Since April 20, 2008
4 Years!!! :lilheart:
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AF Daily - Monday November 15
IJM--your post made me smile. It's been great having you on the daily thread, I hope you stick around. You stud muffin you!
BTC- in reference to your question about modding, I can only speak for myself. The main thing that attracted me to "My Way Out" was the notion that I could learn to drink in moderation. I joined the forum in February of 08 and was trying to mod right off the bat. I could not. Simple. I could NOT control my drinking EVERY time I drank. I never could. The straw that broke the camels back was when I went against my better judgment and went to the bar during a local annual celebration and drank beer all afternoon and evening. Then I drove home. The cops had a check point set up after we got home. I came so very close to spending the night in jail. I decided that it was quite obvious that I could not CONTROL (Moderate) my intake and it seemed to me that this was such a close call I better listen. So I decided to try 30 days af. That felt so good I tried 30 more. Then 90. We had company over for our anniversary, and I had just a few beers, but it just wasn't worth it, I had learned to enjoy no hangovers and all the great things that come with being AF.
So, as far as my experience, I did try to drink in moderation. Now I don't drink alcohol at all and I like it that way.
I hope you find a new therapist that helps you out with the PTSD. What a horrible thing to have to live with. Good for you for recognizing the alcohol problem and dealing with things. (And just ignore those booger eaters--they are gross!!):H_______________
NF since June 1, 2008
AF since September 28, 2008
DrunkFree since June 1, 2008
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:wings: In memory of MDbiker aka Bear.
5/4/2010 In loving memory of MaryAnne. I pray you've found peace my friend.
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The will of God will never take you where the Grace of God will not protect you.ray:
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AF Daily - Monday November 15
btc, hang in there!
that therapist sounds like she needs to go to therapy. yuck! some people are in the wrong profession, for sure. there are caring cazpable prefessionals out there, you'll find one....sometimes one has to shop around.
my best friend from childhood calls her "mom", "the woman who gave birth to me".
here's to better days ahead!
ps if you are into men and wonder if there are any good ones out there, i know there are, i'm married to the sweetest, kindest most empathetic person i've ever met, and he's a boy!
eta, no modding here!
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