Weekly AA Thread Dec. 6 thru Dec. 12

[mylife]

Weekly AA Thread Dec. 6 thru Dec. 12

Hi All,

For my two cents woth -- I noticed people who could relate with their sponsors really excelled in their AA steps.

However probably for that reason, in my group, they were very big on pushing sponsors -- and at 90 days when I didn't have one, I was approached and kind of pushed into accepting a sponsor. I have to say although she was a really nice person, other than drinking we had NOTHING in common. It was very hard to relate to her, and then it was awkward trying to let her know that I wanted a new sponsor. So, I would just from my experience be careful who you choose and let it be your decision.

However, as I said earlier, people who had sponsors they connected with seemed to find a really great place in their sobriety and in their place in AA. From what I was taught in my meetings it is a very important step toward maintaining sobriety for the long term.

[Choochie]

Weekly AA Thread Dec. 6 thru Dec. 12

THIS IS OFFICIALLY NOW MY FAVORITE THREAD:l

Dancelot - can't thank you enough for this detailed rendition of your AA experience. I loved reading every word and really appreciate your taking the time. I don't mind making an extra sandwich at all. And, it's so timely for me since I go to my second meeting this morning. Thank you, thank you, thank you!:thanks:

ML - your post is so helpful too.

Thanks both of you for giving me insight so I can approach AA thoughtfully. I'm just so much more comfortable with a bit of a feel for something before I launch into it. I find that it's typical for me to jump into things all excited, and then retreat later and regret being too impetuous (the exact opposite of Dancelot). So, what you guys have posted here will help me go in with clearer thinking.

Have a wonderful day everyone. I'll be sure to report back later.

xx,
Choochie

[dancelot]

Weekly AA Thread Dec. 6 thru Dec. 12

Thanks Chooch! This is my favorite thread too - I just need to remember the sandwich, or I forget to eat! :H


Funny too, my sponsor brought up that we need to get some face to meet ups in before she leaves "since we'll be doing e-mail and phones." That's what we've been doing all week, as she's been out of town.


She is someone who I feel very comfortable talking too, she has over 20 years sobriety, and has a similar enough life experience, and is close enough in age to me (not that that's always necessary - one person I was thinking about approaching is a lot younger than me). I feel she listens to me, which is good - I'm getting better at not censoring myself so much I lose me, but when I feel someone is OK with that, it makes it easier.


Hope everyone's having a great Saturday!
Anyway, we'll see how it goes, and whatever it is or how it turns out will be OK.


In my meetings, they always ask if anyone is willing to be a temporary sponsor, and always give out a newcomer packet that everyone puts their phone numbers on. There is a also a preprinted call list that includes their sobriety dates. I had to ask each one if which Susan or Debbie they were, since there seem to be lots of women with the same first name (big group), so I didn't call the wrong one, instead of the one I might intend to).


One of the women I talked with advised it was good idea to call or e-mail different people and get a feel for each other and get to know them. Of course being my procrastinating self, I never got around to it (since it was surely last week, not 3 months ago!).


My sponsor I know from meetings and she is someone I have a lot of respect for. I realize too, I tend to think of certain people as "higher ups" or something, and therefore unapproachable. Like asking advice of the Pope vs the priest maybe. That's weird, I know, and it's subconscious - I just saw that. That's also just me, not anything that actually goes on - there is no official hierarchy and we are all equal. She told me too, even an experienced member going through the steps again with a newcomer makes them look at it again as well, so it's mutually beneficial.

[Choochie]

Weekly AA Thread Dec. 6 thru Dec. 12

Dancelot, again really helpful information for me. I could not possibly know these things and find them invaluable. I'm not trying to be a control freak or orchestrate things, but it just makes me feel less intimidated going into the unknown. So, thanks much!

My 2nd Meeting Today:

This was a much smaller meeting - maybe 10 women. The subject was gratitude and it was interesting to hear others talk about having to work on their negativity and keep their gratitude lists with them if they started getting down. A couple of people seemed really sad, but you could tell that talking helped them. Very theraputic and heart-warming for many of us listening, too. One woman has just been diagnosed with cancer. She was emotional as you can imagine and said how happy she was to be able to let down at our meeting as she was trying to be strong around her family because they are so upset.

She actually talked after me, and it might have been my story that made her open up. When I got to the part about my husband's recurrent cancer, I got choked up and had to stop talking. Anyway, he's doing really well right now; it was just emotional to talk about it. I too keep things pretty bottled up around my husband trying to stay positive, so when I started telling my story, I got sad.

After the meeting, the women were so kind. Many gave me hugs, their phone numbers, and told me to call them. It was such a relief to be around people who really understand what I'm going through. I am extremely grateful to have this safe place to go to.

So, interestingly, the meeting wasn't so much about alcoholism as it was personal issues. The last meeting most people talked about their drinking life and how they came to be sober. I liked the fact that the meeting just had a natural flow and was relaxed - not prescribed (other than the leader throwing out the subject of gratitude). After the meeting one of the women thanked me for being open and said that they (the women like her who had been in AA for a long time) need to hear stories like mine. I think it keeps people grounded when they see new people come into the program.

Thanks for all of you here - posting about your experiences, and giving me the interest in trying AA. I would never have gone if it weren't for reading your posts.

xx,
Choochie:l

[j-vo]

Weekly AA Thread Dec. 6 thru Dec. 12

Choochie, sorry to hear of your husband's cancer. That has to be very difficult for you and yet, comforting to know there are those there to support you and give you hugs. I'll say prayers for you.

Dance, I like what you said: "It's not a race." That's one thing my ex-sponsor said to me that I didn't agree with. She compared me to another one of her sponsees and said that I'd never get as far as her or as quickly as she did because I'm too casual about my program. I told her it wasn't a race (think I read that last night on here) and that I'm getting there at my own pace.

I'm trying to find a temporary sponsor. I've got a call into a woman from my home group. I will broach the subject with the word "temporary." I think my former sponsor (as of today) set me on the right road to recovery, but because of some differences, I need to choose a different sponsor.

When my sponsor told me she didn't think I was putting my sobriety first, that I was being too casual, I thought for a fleeting moment, "maybe AA isn't for me if I can't do it the right way." Well, I think I am doing everything that I can and at a pace that is right for me.

Have a great night all.