AF daily - Friday, December 10th
((((AFM)))) I can relate completely to your feelings of guilt at not being with your Dad every second, and then switcheroo to feelings of resentment that other family members aren't doing as much. I spent a lot of time on that teeter totter related to my own Dad, whose health has been on a slow decline for a few years now. What I have learned is that I needed to focus ONLY on my own relationshiop with him. Comparing what I do to what others do is really pointless.
I have also learned I have to love myself enough to trust that I have been a good daughter. I am not perfect and neither is my Dad. But we have both done our best and that is what we continue to do with whatever time remains for us.
Another real blessing for me, although it did not feel this way when it was first pointed out to me is that losing our parents while we are still here is a normal course of events, and the majority of people go through it. It feels lonely, but it's not unusual at all. The unusual situation is a parent losing a child. Once I really stopped to consider all this, it became much easier to accept the process with my Dad. And who knows. In the blink of an eye all that can change too. We just never know what the future holds.
I don't know if this helps or not - just felt like the right thing to share it.
GAC - enjoy every moment of contented sobriety that you get. There will probably be good days/moments and more difficult days/moments. Don't waste the good moments in fear of the other ones!
Greenie! When do you expect to hear about the job? Pumpkin bread sounds fabulous. I would LOOVVVEEE if one of my neighbors or friends got an Eggo or whatever that thing is for chickens and eggs! Or maybe Lav could just move here.
Bear, congrats on 14 AF days! Hope you are feeling better soon.
((((AFM)))) I can relate completely to your feelings of guilt at not being with your Dad every second, and then switcheroo to feelings of resentment that other family members aren't doing as much. I spent a lot of time on that teeter totter related to my own Dad, whose health has been on a slow decline for a few years now. What I have learned is that I needed to focus ONLY on my own relationshiop with him. Comparing what I do to what others do is really pointless.
I have also learned I have to love myself enough to trust that I have been a good daughter. I am not perfect and neither is my Dad. But we have both done our best and that is what we continue to do with whatever time remains for us.
Another real blessing for me, although it did not feel this way when it was first pointed out to me is that losing our parents while we are still here is a normal course of events, and the majority of people go through it. It feels lonely, but it's not unusual at all. The unusual situation is a parent losing a child. Once I really stopped to consider all this, it became much easier to accept the process with my Dad. And who knows. In the blink of an eye all that can change too. We just never know what the future holds.
I don't know if this helps or not - just felt like the right thing to share it.
GAC - enjoy every moment of contented sobriety that you get. There will probably be good days/moments and more difficult days/moments. Don't waste the good moments in fear of the other ones!
Greenie! When do you expect to hear about the job? Pumpkin bread sounds fabulous. I would LOOVVVEEE if one of my neighbors or friends got an Eggo or whatever that thing is for chickens and eggs! Or maybe Lav could just move here.
Bear, congrats on 14 AF days! Hope you are feeling better soon.
ray:
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