Ok I am going to give it a go thanks Brigid

[Lucy Van Pelt]

Well...I write this at 10 am, and just hope I can feel the same way at 5 pm, but as Brigid keeps reminding me, it all comes down to a decision, and I have decided. I want, and need, to just cut the crap. I have been on Topa for quite a while and it really has helped trememdously with cravings, so the fact is my decisions to continue drinking have been just that....decisions. And not the right ones. I don't know why I go and drink but I don't need to, and I have promised myself that I will stay sober for two weeks and re-assess then. That seems like a reasonable goal to me (at least at this hour of the day), and if I feel differently later, I will come back here and read my own post. I am putting it here because I think it will help me to keep my promise to myself, and also motivate me because I have made it public.

Ok, now all I have to do is hit "submit".

[cpn1004]

Ok I am going to give it a go thanks Brigid

Ok, me too.
Phil

[mikeupnorth]

Ok I am going to give it a go thanks Brigid

Way to go, Beth!

Brigid is right: it does come down to just making a decision. And then, of course, sticking to it. It is amazingly simple. So simple, in fact, that it took me years to "get it." I kept thinking that there had to be more to it.

I will say that the Topamax has played a huge role for me in my early abstinence. With the exception of my first attempt at AA some years ago, I never was able to string more than a few sober days together. I was always struggling with physical cravings, although I didn't recognize them as such. All I knew was that no matter how much I "wanted" not to drink, I would always change my mind when temptation came along in the evenings. The thoughts of drinking would become more than thoughts.... they would turn into longing, yearning, craving, and I would sit for hours sometimes obsessed with whether or not to drink, changing my mind over and over, until eventually I would cave in. This time, with topa, I still thought about drinking, but it was much easier to have it just be an intellectual exercise -- and much easier for me to short-circuit that. It allowed me the relief from the deep yearning/longing/craving, so I could work on how I thought about alcohol, and my relationship to it, which I am still doing. And building up my strength and coping skills will be a lifelong project.

The reason I say that is to encourage you, Beth, to take advantage of your Topamax and whatever other tools you have at your disposal. You have advantages that many people in the world don't have. You have this board, for one thing -- it can be a good source of support for your abstinence goal. The vitamins and supplements can go a long way in helping your body regain some balance and help you through your difficult moments, too. The biggest hurdle, at times, can be the space between your two ears! You said something about feeling differently at 5 PM than you do right now. You probably will. But at 5 PM come back here and remind yourself of what your commitment is: to stay sober today and for the next two weeks. No matter how much you might want a drink tonight, it's not going to kill you to abstain! You will feel very good about yourself tomorrow once you've made it through day 1, and then the successful days start piling up. You feel better and better, and you don't want to go back!

OK I'm turning into a rabid cheerleader here but I just want to see people succeed. I know you can do it and I wish you the best.

Hello to the rest of you Abbers ~ and have a great day!

Mike

[lushy]

Ok I am going to give it a go thanks Brigid

Beth I am sending you good wishes as well. Logically it all makes sense and what Mike said is so true. It is like starting a diet though; it is so easy to put it off for one more day. You CAN do it and you will be so proud of yourself in two weeks. We are all rooting for you.

[dilayne]

Ok I am going to give it a go thanks Brigid

Beth and Phil! Welcome and best of luck! I always loved the phrase, 'freedom in commitment'...it's exactly how I felt when I finally surrendered to going AF a month ago..I felt a huge burden lifted from me..I guess because I resisted the decision for a while...you are now free to not drink!

[TracyA]

Ok I am going to give it a go thanks Brigid

Good for you, Beth! I'm pulling for ya.

Tracy

[Guest]

Ok I am going to give it a go thanks Brigid

Beth,
I cant let my name go here without a response. Your post is HONEST... whoopie.. that so great.

And dont give ME credit for anything.. YOU are the one doing this... and YOU are the one that CAN do this. YOu know at the point of posting that you ARE capable of it.. you now, just have to DO it.. and prove it to yourself..

As for me, well, Beth, I KNOW you can do it.. you have to prove it to yourself.

I'll try to go on chat around 5pm your time.. dont know about how the time zones work.. but I"ll try and see if that gets you through day 1...

go girl.
Brigid

[Lucy Van Pelt]

Ok I am going to give it a go thanks Brigid

I made it!!!! Thank you all!!! My thought for tomorrow is this......I have to keep in mind that even when it gets hard.....in the end...it is sooooo worthwhile.

Day 1 down.....13 to go...for now.

Thanks for the support guys:h

[YoungAtHeart]

Ok I am going to give it a go thanks Brigid

Good job, Beth. Deciding is the hardest thing!

All the best to you too, Phil! I'm pulling for you!

My daughter morphed back into a normal, lovely human being today. Praise the Lord!

Lots of love,
Kathy:l

[Paddy]

Ok I am going to give it a go thanks Brigid

Congrats, me too, Beth. In fact, I did promise it to God at the end of October. Unfortunately, I relapsed. But after reading Paige's story (see https://www.mywayout.org/community/t6...e-3-6230.html). I made my mind up. No alcohol.

Good on you, Phil!

And congrats Kathy for the transformation of your daughter.

:l

[AMELIA]

Ok I am going to give it a go thanks Brigid

Beth and Phil,
Well done and good luck to the both of you.
Amelia

[helen mary]

Ok I am going to give it a go thanks Brigid

Beth
Eat a BIG MEAL at 4.30. You will be less inclined to want to drink with a full stomach, don't worry if you are thinking of weight issues like a lot of women do - that can come later.

It helps me I hope it will help you.

Helen

[gabby]

Ok I am going to give it a go thanks Brigid

Good on all of you! Brigid.......espically you.....you have helped me so much as well. Look how you are helpin so many others. I have thought a lot about what you said in my last post in long term abbers.
So that leads me to a big.......
GOOD ON ME! 5 and a half months and proud of it. : )