AF Daily Tuesday March 29

[Lavande]

Good morning Abbers!

Prepping myself for a day out!
Going to get my teeth cleaned this morning then meeting a friend for lunch! She is a breast cancer survivor & I admire her strength :l
Our kids played together when they were toddlers, grew up together & we have witnessed the ups & downs in both our lives. So happy that she will see her brand new twin grandsons grow up

Wishing everyone a great AF Tuesday!
Lav

[universal]

AF Daily Tuesday March 29

Morning abbers!

Took my daughter to go see the new diary of a wimpy kid movie last night - she loved it and it was so much fun to have a nice sober family night.

Had a great therapy appointment yesterday and am feeling positive again.

LVT - glad you found the coloring books! As for your sons room? I would say let him be himself and paint it how he wants - you can always paint it again in 2 years when he goes to college but as a teenager he needs to have some feeling of freedom - if that can come in the form of a goofy colored room for him what's the harm? That's just my opinion of course, I don't know your relationship so take it with a grain of salt.

Busy day today - feeling a bit off but a coffee and a shower should fix that for me.

Love and hugs - one thing is for sure over here.

[LVT25]

AF Daily Tuesday March 29

Good morning friends, (grab a snack)

I want to thank you for the input Uni. My son and I had a talk last night, and I came away feeling like I don't have a clue what I'm doing as a parent. I think I may be paranoid that he is going to make the same stupid mistakes his dad and I did at his age and I've been trying so hard to try to prevent that. He pointed out that maybe he needs to have a little more trust and freedom to make his own mistakes and learn from them. I have had so many people tell me it is a mistake to try to be their friend instead of their parent. But I also know what can happen if one is too strict with them. I may have over reacted Friday night when he did something without my permission, and I was willing to admit that when he quit pouting. I am not feeling too great about the fact that he decided to do a term paper about over-parenting parents. The main issue right now is curfew. His driver's license requires him to only be able to drive between 6 am and midnight. So we ask that he be home at 11:30. He will be 17 in September. NONE (could be a stretch) of his friends have to be home until 12. I'm starting to think it's not worth the battle for 30 minutes. I also am trying to remind him that he is not doing what is required of him around here like keeping his room picked up or his car. So, we are going to have to continue the negotiations.
I do hate the thought of painting that room red. I don't think I can go for black at all, but I can handle the red. I feel like I get some say in the matter since we pay the mortgage.
We are going to Home Depot to see what we can come up with. This will give us more time to continue our conversation. In the meantime, I am re-reading my book on Detachment and Letting Go.

My youngest has a track meet today. I dislike track, especially when it is cold. I also need to pick up our beef and make bread for church soup supper and then I have a meeting tonight so it's zoom zoom for me.

Thanks as always for letting me vent and sharing your opinions. Have a great sober day today all! :h

[papmom3]

AF Daily Tuesday March 29

LVT-I have no words of advice as far as parenting goes as I have no kids and I don't think DD counts . But, I did move into an apartment one time that had at least 2 walls painted the deepest navy blue I have ever seen!! I picked out peach paint and seriously, I think it only took 2 or 3 coats to cover it and this was way back before the all in one paint that includes primer. I don't even think we used primer come to think of it!!

Uni-haven't seen any of the wimpy kids movies or read the books. Are they appropriate for adults without kids? Will I get it? I just think the story behind the story is such a sweet rags to riches story don't you? Hope you're feeling better after your shower and coffee. Glad you had a great therapy appointment yesterday.

Lav-have a great lunch today with your friend! Is it time to cut YB loose? Just asking as a friend and with lots of concern for you.

Another sick day at home. Cancelled my dental surgery but they are keeping my $100 deposit. Jerks. I'm definitely looking for a new dentist. I want to go back to a family dentist, not one one of these "centers". do the family dentists still exist? I miss the one that took care of my family for decades but I guess he deserved to retire. grrrr.
I am feeling a tad better so will try to at least get the dishes done and go out for my RLS meds which I ran out of 3 nites ago and I have been miserable trying to sleep ever since. Last nite was the worst. My whole body felt electrified and the leg jerking was intolerable. I've fallen back into the sugar trap again and I wonder if there is more to that connection than I was able to find out earlier. Time for some real deep research.

Have great day everyone. It's sunny and in the mid 40's today and will go up to 50 tomorrow. Yee Haw!!
:l

[jane jane]

AF Daily Tuesday March 29

Morning, all!

LVT, I second the motion to let son paint room any color, however hideous. Been there, done that, painted over it when college-time came! Actually, I love a bright-red room, so let him have it, I say.

TEENS! Ugh. My girls weren't too awful, although one was so sassy and disrespectful for a couple of years that I BLAME HER TOTALLY for my increased drinking during that time (just kidding! Really!) She's the one who chose a god-awful purply-blue for her bedroom...such a luuuuuuvly contrast to the neutrals everywhere else chez Jane. We paid for the paint, but made her do the actual labor herself. This meant that she actually had to clean out lots of junk before starting, so it was kind of a good thing, looking back!

Lavande, prayers here for your friend.

Enjoying sober life, but doing a lot of thinking in preparation for this weekend. We are flying to Boston for the wedding of a dear friend's daughter, and ohhhhh my there will be alcohol everywhere, from the rehearsal dinner at the Copley Plaza right straight through the brunch on Sunday...I'm already thinking, "Well, what harm can ONE glass of champagne do?"

I know, I know---can't have it. Just can't. Send strength my way, please?

[greeneyes]

AF Daily Tuesday March 29

jane jane;1086640 wrote: I'm already thinking, "Well, what harm can ONE glass of champagne do?"

Oh, let me count the ways...
the weeks........
the months.......
That is all.

Just saying hello - got a wavering mojo today for some reason. Ick. I need to get to the woods & river.

[papmom3]

AF Daily Tuesday March 29

Well JJ-you are in a tough situation. You can't very well opt out of this wedding but the "in your face" reality is going to be very tough. Only you can decide how you're going to handle this but if you are like the rest of us here, that one glass of champagne is going to probably lead to a very drunken reception and then a full blown relapse. The only way to avoid that is to not take that first drink at all and that is going to be really tough. Hopefully someone here has been through this situation and can give you some tools to help you through the weekend. I have my first wedding since I went AF this coming October. Right now I believe I am strong enough to deal with whatever alcohol will be flowing but if this wedding had been last October I'm not sure how strong I would have been. I guess what I am clumsily saying is don't take that first drink no matter what.
I will send you strength and prayers from the west of Beantown and you can feel free to PM me anytime you need to. If you think it would be helpful while you're at the wedding festivities, you can have my cell # if you need some real time support or if you're about to cave.

[akgirl]

AF Daily Tuesday March 29

Hi everyone,

I hope you don't mind if I join the AF daily gang. I remember most of you and look forward to getting to know the rest.

Its good to be back at MWO. The best part is I'm finally AF.....and I do mean finally. Seems like I tried forever....looking back I wasn't really trying as hard as I told myself I was. But now I am 11 days sober and have absolutely no desire to drink again.

Not the best at addressing each one but a friendly hello and :l to all! Have a great day!

[bear73]

AF Daily Tuesday March 29

hey all - whizzing by still af and loving it .

JaneJane it's my birthday weekend and everyone else will be booze booze everywhere - but not me - I plan to go back to my nice hotel early and chill out if temptation gets too much.
I am very much concentrating on the food and the conversation - have you tired reading allan carr?

He helps you to see that really you're not missing out and can do sober what you did whilst drinking - if you really can't get out of it I find that approach helps me.

good luck

[universal]

AF Daily Tuesday March 29

Club soda and lime - that's what I drink at wedding receptions. I still feel sophisticated and social but I'm sober. And I pour it into the wine glass at the table and that way the servers don't try to fill up my glass with wine. That's worked for me in the past. oh, and always have an escape plan of some type.

Papmom - I think the diary of a wimpy kids books and movies are awesome - even without kids - they are just cute. You know how some disney movies are just cute and it doesn't matter if you have kids or not? I feel the same of those movies - just my opinion - not sure of your taste in movies so I don't know if you would like them or not.

[jane jane]

AF Daily Tuesday March 29

Thanks to those who offered much-needed support! My plan: I will swill plain tonic water with lime until it flows out my ears, but no alcohol, I promise! I find that if I can make it through the first hour, I sort of forget to feel "deprived."

[Lavande]

AF Daily Tuesday March 29

jane,
I remember when I first found this site someone(could have been DG, not sure) talked about assigning alcohol to a less important place in your life. That made sense to me at the time & I found I didn't think about it so much. The point & purpose of attending a wedding is to witness the marriage of the bride & groom, share in the joy & happiness of the moment, see family & old friends, etc. All that can be accomplished quite well with AL. The first time I attended a wedding where no AL was served I thought it was going to be weird but it wasn't. The bride & groom didn't drink so punch was served & no one complained & we all had a good time

[Lavande]

AF Daily Tuesday March 29

GREENIE!!!!!

I just found something to help you get your mojo back and -
You can use your chainsaw to do it

Yogi's Wood Carvings

I actually have a carved bear in my kitchen. He came from a chainsaw carver in western PA. I'll have to get a picture of 'Casey' for you

[Determinator]

AF Daily Tuesday March 29

whew, huge stressful day but I'm doing it AF.

thanks for the happy kickstart Lavande!

AK girl!!! heya stranger. how the heck are you? kudos on your AF time and great to have you

Jane Jane! wow, also an old timer I haven't seen in ages.

Papmom, have you tried large doses of magnesium for your RLS? hope you get some relief soon

trying to de-stress a bit here and I'm going to make myself go to the gym. I know I'll feel much better

be well everyone

[Doggygirl]

AF Daily Tuesday March 29

Hi fabbies! Late check in for me. Busy week.

Deter, I am SO PROUD OF YOU for hanging in there through your very frightening drive and then coming home to an empty house, missing the trip with Dx, etc. SOBER. That was really a great suggestion she gave to just take an Antabuse. That stuff is like insurance, isn't it. Bravo!!! Bet you were glad to see her tonight!!

Lav, I'm sorry to hear about the YB encounter. You are such a trooper. I'm so glad you find a way to not let him bring you down. Grandbaby #3 is a great reason to look at the bright side of life! STORK STORK STORK

Jane Jane, it always helps me keep perspective to remind myself of my #1 priority. Sobriety. My life will start to unravel at the seams if I drink. Becuase there is no "just one" for me. I just refuse to get on that roller coaster again. So...my plan for any social outings where AL will be present is as follows:

1. Decide in advance what I will drink.
2. Eat before I go and eat while I'm there. (I'm less likely to be attracted to AL on a full stomach)
3. Arrive as late as possible.
4. Have an early exit strategy.
5. Identify some non-drinkers to hang with.

I used to just dread Chamber of Commerce social events. Business networking without an ounce or 50 of courage in a bottle????? LOL - I've participated in AA long enough to know who the other AAers are. So I always know now who to go hang with.

Even though it's a wedding, you can still leave the reception early. Lots of people do for various reasons. I don't care where I am or how important it is, I will LEAVE before I drink.

Uni, good to hear you sounding optimistic today! How was the movie?

Bear, looking forward to your birthday!

AKgirl, :welcome: to AF Daily! Good to have you with us. Congrats on 11 Days AF!!!! :yougo:

P3! Sorry to hear you are sick. That really stinks about the dentist and the $100. I would definitely make sure that was the last dollar my dentist ever got from me if they did that!!!! Hope you feel better soon!

Greenie - did you go to the River and find your mojo??? Whenever you say you need to go to the river I often think of Chris Farley on Saturday Night Live doing his "Living in a Van Down By the River" motivational speaker gig. :H Maybe your mojo is in a van down by the river???? :l


LVT, I'm not a parent either. My parents were pretty strict with us when we were gets, but we had quite a bit of freedom when it came to our own rooms. Glad to hear you are working it out! I can't imagine what hell it must be at times to have teenagers.

shout out to Sara - I love what you wrote at the start of yesterdays thread!

At AA this morning, a guy who I'm friends with did this silly introduction and I thought he was imitating Pee Wee Herman (one of my favorite comedians of all time!!!!) Turns out he was imitating ME! :H

I have way too many clothes. That is all. As the future seasons come along, there is a new rule. If anything new comes in, at least two things need to leave. Until this situation is sane. If I had a shot and a beer for every pair of shoes, I would be dead.

Time for beddy bye. SO grateful to be sober. SO grateful for the fellowship we have here on this thread. One thing is for sure...

DG

PS - If I had a shot and a beer for every time I got the "you have included 7 smilies in your message...." error, I would be dead a second time in this post.