I am day 2 AF and planning to stick that way - f**k pleasing everyone else anymore (or thinking I am by drinking) and being in denial 'I'm not that bad' - I am better AF and have a better life AF and plenty of problems caused by alcohol already.
Momof3 - your old situation is the same as mine.
Hippychick I really related to the drinking to please others/even if there is no pressure I pressure myself to fit in in those situations.
Papmom - I agree.
I have to change this BS I am angry that I fell for my own BS - spent morning in bed today reading smart recovery book and doing exercises - lots of talk of low frustration tolerance,all or nothing thinking,drinking to escape/numb which I really identify with.
I don't keep wanting to feel how I felt yesterday - blue, sulky,drained and fat and unhealthy and no enthusiasm at all. It is on with the daily work of being sober today.This all may sound totally unrelated to not drinking BUT for me there is something about getting my surroundings close to being straight.
Today my plan is to try out out paint colours for my kitchen, I will paint it during the 2 weeks I have off at end of April (injured knee skating). I am also buying some garden canes and gro bags,maybe some flowering plants and dumping some old clothes I never wear at the recycling point.
Tomorrow the plan is paying my birthday money in, picking up a dress I ordered and returning some others. Got evening work meeting slap bang in middle of week off - grrr - but hey cant change it.
Friday I will be putting old winter clothes in loft, bringing down last year's summer gear and cleaning house ready for friends' stay at the weekend.
Good day all to come - late shower and getting dressed time for me.
Momof3 - your old situation is the same as mine.
Hippychick I really related to the drinking to please others/even if there is no pressure I pressure myself to fit in in those situations.
Papmom - I agree.
I have to change this BS I am angry that I fell for my own BS - spent morning in bed today reading smart recovery book and doing exercises - lots of talk of low frustration tolerance,all or nothing thinking,drinking to escape/numb which I really identify with.
I don't keep wanting to feel how I felt yesterday - blue, sulky,drained and fat and unhealthy and no enthusiasm at all. It is on with the daily work of being sober today.This all may sound totally unrelated to not drinking BUT for me there is something about getting my surroundings close to being straight.
Today my plan is to try out out paint colours for my kitchen, I will paint it during the 2 weeks I have off at end of April (injured knee skating). I am also buying some garden canes and gro bags,maybe some flowering plants and dumping some old clothes I never wear at the recycling point.
Tomorrow the plan is paying my birthday money in, picking up a dress I ordered and returning some others. Got evening work meeting slap bang in middle of week off - grrr - but hey cant change it.
Friday I will be putting old winter clothes in loft, bringing down last year's summer gear and cleaning house ready for friends' stay at the weekend.
Good day all to come - late shower and getting dressed time for me.
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