af daily fri 8 April

[bear73]

Morning all - day 4 here and I am feeling happier and pleased at what I have accomplished this week.I really relate to the missing of the euphoria and the feeling of being a bit of a rebel when drinking.That is something I majorly struggle with,that feeling of losing that side of life/myself I have a lot of stress at work (or rather I let work stress me a lot),I worry a lot and I talk myself down in my head. I ruminate over am I really depressed or over exaggerating,am I really an alcoholic or making mountains out of nothing, do people really like/love me, what am I good at - none of which helps me feel better.

I have done this for years since I was a teenager in my room - I carried it on through university, and also when I started working I worked shifts so had days on my own. I was so scared for such a long time to try new things in case I was rubbish,develop hobbies, I was worried if I did develop hobbies that it would mean that I had time away from my group of friends/would be forgotten/left out. I still do have that fear with creative things such as art,writing and music - all things I love - but I am scared to try.I still do have pangs that I am taking too much time for myself (derby is 3 evenings a week),my friends comment that I'm not around as much as I used to be at weekends. I have new friends now through the team as well.

I think we all need an outlet - I just need to find a better outlet. I'm seeing a cbt counsellor at the moment to help me stop this crazy thinking. Gardening and rollerderby help - I am going to try zumba, and start running again now that the weather is nice.I'm also looking forward to decorating my house.

Keeping busy helps with depression and avoiding drinking thoughts,I have a long long long way to go but am making small steps.
Thanks for listening - this forum gives me so much inspiration and I doubt I would be making these changes if I hadn't stumbled across it.

[papmom3]

af daily fri 8 April

Hi Bear-keep those good vibes coming!! You can do this IF you truly want to. That is really the key!!

Intervew in less than 2 hours!! Nervous, excited, prepared (I hope)! then a house full of Yappy Pappys for the weekend!!

Will check in after the interview!!

:l

[jennyneric]

af daily fri 8 April

Good Morning bear, PM3, and all to come.

Your sounding good bear

PM3 good luck! How fun to have a house full of dogs all weekend!

I'll check back later.

[Lavande]

af daily fri 8 April

Good morning Abbers!

Papmom - good luck with your interview friend
Show them the new & improved YOU!

Greetings bear & jenny & all to come today!

I'm trying to figure out where Spring went
Rain, chilly & dark outside my window this morning - that's not very Springy

Wishing everyone a wonderful AF Friday!
Lav

[momof3]

af daily fri 8 April

Good Morning Fabber Abbers,

Jenny, What happened to your daughter was so wrong and I completely understand the anger and resentment that you experienced from it. I would have been outraged. I am confident that your reaction sent a strong message to your daughter though...that you will stick up for her no matter what AND that you showed her that it is important to say/do the right thing even in the face of everyone else saying "nothing is wrong."

I had an experience about 6 years ago where my daughter (who has aspergers and adhd) was being horribly treated by her teachers and by the principal. They treated her as a big behavior problem and it got to the point where I no longer felt she was safe in the school. I finally took her out of school in the middle of the school year. I received support from no one on this, not even my husband. Looking back, it was the right decision. I enrolled her in another school the following year and she thrived. Unfortunately, during that time, I was AF but had a major relapse that lasted for 2 years. My drinking really escalated. I was lost.

Bear. You can be a bad ass roller derby chick without the alcohol. Just think how much your performance and stamina will improve. As Papmon said, it is up to you.

Papmom. Good luck on that interview today. Let us know how it goes. Can't wait to hear.

Hi Lav, I hope you are enjoying those grandbabies.

Later,
M3

[momof3]

af daily fri 8 April

11 Months for Papmom!!!

[LVT25]

af daily fri 8 April

Hello friends,

Just checking in to say congrats to "Grange" for 30 days and Papmom 11 months and hope your interview goes well.

Not much to add really. I am so glad I am past the early stage of quitting al and cigarettes and into the I'm so glad I quit stage. For me I guess it was easier because it was a natural transition into my 50's. I was more of a social/binge drinker that turned into a bad almost nightly habit. I made many bad choices (drinking/driving) and fucked up my brain. I thank God I outgrew it or whatever happened to get me off the poison. The more I learn about the effects of alcohol on the body--especially the brain, it scares the shit out of me! I know I've done damage to myself that unfortunately is irreversible. I worry that I will be taking care of a husband with dementia or alzheimers if he doesn't stop drinking. I'm glad I stopped in time to be a better parent, and a better person. I wish I would have learned how to have fun without the drink at a young age and I'm pissed at those that showed me the relaxing effects of alcohol. But that is all in the past, and I will admit I had some pretty fun times that wouldn't have happened without the alcohol. But it's a shame I can't remember a lot of them too.

Anyway, I'll stop rambling for now. It's Friday again. I tend to dislike my weekends because it means more time around my family that often ends in me being pissed off. Hopefully hubby had enough to drink last night that he won't feel the need to partake tonight. Busy weekend ahead again--lots of volunteer stuff. I start work at the cemetery next week, so I hope it warms up a bit.

Have a great weekend all.:h

[momof3]

af daily fri 8 April

LVT25;1094126 wrote: Hello friends,

I wish I would have learned how to have fun without the drink at a young age and I'm pissed at those that showed me the relaxing effects of alcohol. But that is all in the past, and I will admit I had some pretty fun times that wouldn't have happened without the alcohol. But it's a shame I can't remember a lot of them too.

Amen Sistah! I started drinking when I was 14 years old. I knew nothing else.

[papmom3]

af daily fri 8 April

Interview is over. I was prepared, myself and did the best I could. Now I just have to wait and see if I get called for round 2. Maybe a little overqualified but I tried to address that and we'll see if I was successful.

[Determinator]

af daily fri 8 April

Well done Papmom!


lets all have a super AF weekend. Aloha Friday xxxxxx

be well

[mylife]

af daily fri 8 April

Hello All,

This is such a great and supportive thread!

Papmom - congratulations on getting through the interview! As you said, all you can do is your best and just wait and see! Good luck!

Jenn, I would have been furious with my husband/in-laws as well if that happened to me. I'm sorry you had to go through that, and I'm glad your daughter is okay.

Hope everyone has a wonderful AF day -- I'll check back later tonight.

[Cassia]

af daily fri 8 April

Well done Papmom! Keep us updated! Did they say how many more candidates they were seeing? Congrats on 11 months!!! X

X

[papmom3]

af daily fri 8 April

hi Cassia-I was number 3 of 8 I believe.
Thanks all for the congrats on the 11 months! It feels very good and I'm already looking forward to my 1 year party!!

[greeneyes]

af daily fri 8 April

Hallloooooo fabbies!

Just had a dose of the woods that was sorely needed. I just get out of balance without it and it's been a week since my back was sort of hurting for a bit.

Jen, I'm sorry that you experienced feeling your power was taken away. That packs a lot of emotion and still seems to be tied into your interactions with extened family. Quitting drinking will go a long way towards reclaiming and keeping your power. I've had to do that a couple times and I can tell you, it ain't easy! I have experienced difficulty with setting and enforcing boundaries. I can do it now, but I would like it to be less emotionally charged. It's a process I guess.

Newgrange congratulations on 30 days!! And P3 on 11 months! Yay!!

This drinking talk has created odd feelings for me and I'll just leave it at that. I don't want to go back there right now.

DG, my sister bailed out on a week's vacation at my dad's timeshare. However, the GF that went with me for a few years before sister decided she wanted to go every year is going with me so that worked out fine.

Bathroom tile is getting started Sunday. Hoping that goes smoothly.

So cassia, do you have a place to live lined up?

Gotta do something about stinky dog. I let her in the river - phew!

Have a great night!

[Doggygirl]

af daily fri 8 April


Congrats P3 on 11 Months AF!!

And also congrats on a well prepared interview! May the chips fall in the best possible place for you. When are you picking up your new camper? I am so glad you are sharing your journey with us. You are EB2 for me.

Bear, thanks for getting us started today. Isn't it sad how AL just covers up all that other stuff, and we can't get around to dealing with our REAL issues as long as we allow AL to stay in the picture. I applaud you for doing the important soul searching that might be difficult and frustrating right now, but will pay dividends in the end.

Jenny, I am so sorry that your daughter (and you!) had to go through that. Since I read your post yesterday, I can't get out of my mind how many women I have met in recovery who have endured horrific experiences with sexual abuse (themselves and/or their children). AL just seems to be at the center of so much tragedy in life. Why do we think it's our friend? I can't imagine what it would be like to go through what you and your daughter have been through.

Hi Cassia and mylife. Cassia, are you feeling better?

Hi Deter! Hope you are home or almost there for the weekend!

LVT, I really think a lot about brain damage. I just can't mentally keep up with stuff like I think I used to and I am very sure I did a lot of damage up there. I hope I haven't set myself up for Alzheimer's, etc. :egad:

M3, I too wish I would have learned to have fun without AL when I was younger. Fun without AL is different for me than fun WITH AL was (back when there was still some fun to it). But my fun today is so much more rewarding. The AL fun seems shallow when I think back. And often the laughs were at someone else's expense. I don't feel good about that stuff.

Lav, spring left us today too. We've been trying to coordinate with our A/C guy for some work that has to be done to start up our new air conditioner. It needs to be over 50 for him to do what needs doing. We've had plenty of days over 50, but not when he is scheduled to come. Now he can't come today and it's predicted to be in the 80's on Sunday. :upset: WHACKY weather. How is Will doing today?

Where is the green one today? And Uni? And AFM? And the rest of the fabbies?

I had an awesome Mary Kay morning. Got some props at leads group from the woman from Tuesday nights mother/daughter facial. Then got some more orders! My favorite is the lawn care service guy. He bought some after sun gel last summer, and just placed an order to stock up for his crew this summer. I'm trying to explain why sun screen is also important. So far, no dice. I guess the burly guys are OK putting something soothing on there after the burn happens. But something to prevent the burn? Well I guess that would be sissy stuff!!!

Tonight is Dionne Warwick. :yougo: Life is good. Days like today beat the snot out of waking up and choosing vodka over coffee. Actually, any day beats the snot out of that.

One thing is for sure...

DG

"you have included 8 images...." Well P3, the pink pom pom girls had to go....