AF Daily - Saturday 4/23

[greeneyes]

Fabbies!

Getting you off to a start here this (not yet but going to be) glorious day!

DG, thank goodness you found my crown before the royal wedding!!

Friend is visiting and we're doing lots of sight-seeing sort of things - going to the coast today. Yesterday afternoon a walk at the river was declined as it was pushing into happy hour. That way of thinking is all too familiar to me and I'm glad my choices are not influenced by that sort of thing any more. Today we go to Charleston and knock around a bit and have a lunch at the hip new "in" resto. Then maybe a play at the university lab theatre tonight.

one thing's for sure.........

[universal]

AF Daily - Saturday 4/23

Morning!

I'm up early for me on a Saturday morning - kept dreaming about opening the cottage next weekend!Can't wait!

I have to run some errands, groceries, easter bunny stuff and then just laundry and the usual around here.

One thing is for sure!

[Hippy Chick]

AF Daily - Saturday 4/23

Evening - well it is for me anyway!

I have a question. For those of you who have partners who drink and come home regularly drunk, how do you handle it? Do you ignore it? Do you confront your partner? Is it hypocritical to feel annoyed at this happening so often? Although this is nothing new, now that I am sober it really annoys me. Is it because I cant drink that I am annoyed? Any ideas/opinions/suggestions would be gratefully accepted.

Thanks

Hip

[Lavande]

AF Daily - Saturday 4/23

Good morning Abbers!

Just sitting here awaiting YB's arrival.........15 min late & counting, ha ha!
Raining at the moment but supposed to clear a biy later.

Greenie, have a fun, sober day

uni, had a few dreams of the bizarre nature myself last night. Could br leftover stuff from the full moon earlier this week, who knows?

Hippy, my huisband never drank much because he couldn't tolerate it at all - turned into a complete asshole every time he did. He just has a bad attitude about AL because his Dad did a lot of damage to the family due to his drinking years ago. I think I would just keep myself safe & out of his way - hard to tell you what to do

Well, I'm supposed to be heading out to buy some sort of awning, pergola, gazebo to put on my too sunny deck so I can enjoy some time on it this summer with the kids. I really have no tolerance for the heat & direct sun anymore

Wishing everyone a wonderful AF Saturday!
Lav

[Determinator]

AF Daily - Saturday 4/23

hey ABland, not my cheery self yet sad to say. had a really rough week and being in hotels sick is a bad combo for me. anyway, home, safe and AF and looking forward to just doing a lot of sleeping this weekend. Greeneyes, sounds like a fabulous time. have some fun for me eh?
be well everyone.

[bear73]

AF Daily - Saturday 4/23

Hey all back from official duties at 2 bouts and meal afterwards with the team - some weird atmosphere with someone at the moment and I'm not sure what it's about. I am meant to be recording thoughts that get me worried for my CBT sessions - this is going in it.

It's early evening here - OH is down pub with friends and invited me down - TBH I am really hot and tired - just put PJs on and really fancy watching comedy dvd, eating a low fat ice cream and having a bath and early night. Saw band last night and drove - spent afternoon in pub with friend who not seen for ages - was great - no temptation to drink - didn't feel I was missing out. That was different as it was a pub with food and then we were off to a gig - tonight is just pub.I am just too tired - really want a cosy evening with the cats.

Loving being AF - week 3 here now - feeling good. I am trying to take focus off weight loss and just add in exercise - healthy eating - TBH amount I can eat calorie wise is actually quite high so not a hardship. It's getting myself mentally in gear.

Anyway - gonna pop in and out tonight - happy Saturday everyone.

[Doggygirl]

AF Daily - Saturday 4/23

fABbies!!! Thanks to the queen for starting us off today!! If you were to go to the wedding, do you suppose that "other" queen would be jealous of you? Of your crown? OH I know those "not now because it's almost time to drink" thoughts and actions and decision. I'm so glad not to be living with AL as my highest priority any more!! Sounds like you have fun stuff planned for today - hope you are enjoying it all!

Uni! How is my...oops I mean your....puppy today? :h I feel some mandala time coming on later - so once again I thank you & LVT for turning us on to that!

Speaking of.... LVT I can't even imagine how difficult this time must be for your sister and you and your family. :l I just keep hoping that somehow her health takes a turn for the better.

HC, you bring up a very good issue that many of us face - what happens when both drink, then one stops? Sometimes the one who doesn't stop is also a problem drinker, and sometimes not. In my own case, my husband is a "normie" when it comes to alcohol, but he is living proof that pot is just as addictive as AL to some people. I thank my lucky stars that he quit pot on the same date I quit AL. Mean time...he is able to drink safely, but he 1) never gets drunk (because he's a normie and one or two are enough for him!!!) and 2) never drinks in front of me or has AL in the house. It's nice. I appreciate that. We just talked about it yesterday. He reaffirmed that he is happy to support my sobriety by not doing something that he could care less about anyway. :H

I know I'm a lucky one. Have you talked about this with your husband? What does he say about it?

Lav, I hope YB is very productive today.

Det, glad you are home safe and sound! I hope Dr. Dx is taking good care of you.

Bear, Curling up in the PJs sounds good to me!!! For some reason what you posted about the weird team atmosphere made me think of a "perception" thing that happened with me and my Mary Kaylette on Thursday night. Her friend's party was a big one as MK events go - we were facialing 8 women (all related - sisters, aunts, cousins, etc.) One of the female family members - a teen - showed up with 3 friends. I guess she was supposed to be there for the MK party, but her and her friends ended up in the family room watching TV and goofing off. I was remotely aware of their presence and carried on focused on the facials. My MKlette was EXTREMELY annoyed by their activities and was very distracted by that. Same situation - two very different mental ways of dealing with it. When MKlette brought it up afterwards, I was like . I suppose that says it IS possible to focus and not let side crap distract and upset us?? Anyway....

Given my Dad's state of ornery temperament these days, I'm very glad we are going out to lunch tomorrow instead of cooking in there or at my place. He will be much better behaved in public. That is all.

World Figure Skating Championships were to be held in Japan the week after the earthquake. They were re-scheduled (at one point it appeared they might just not have them this year!!). So they are coming up next week in Moscow. :yougo: I will be playing hooky a lot this week!

One thing is for sure....I won't be drinking today, and 6 f'ing smilies is NOWHERE NEAR ENOUGH!!!!

DG

[Cassia]

AF Daily - Saturday 4/23

Hey all,

Just wanted to say a huge thank you to all of you for the support you have given me over the past four months, in particular in the last few weeks. Can't tell you enough how much it has meant to me. :l

[mylife]

AF Daily - Saturday 4/23

Hello Abbers!

It's a gorgeous day but unseasonably HOT here! I have been huddling inside in air conditioning. It sounds like everyone is doing great. Hippy, I would definitely talk to your husband about the drinking while you're working on sobriety. It's really hard as it is, I know I couldn't do it if my husband was drinking every night. Luckily he can take it or leave it and he's left it for the most part since I decided to stop.

I think I'm with Bear, I'll be cozying up tonight. I think my husband is planning to barbeque -- so I'll be eating...that's the next thing I need to work on, but one step at a time!!

Cassia, I agree this place has been a wonderful source of support. And you have done so much over the last 4 months with your life -- you deserve to give yourself a big pat on the back!

Green, Uni, Lav, Det and DG - great to read your posts and thanks so much for the support!

[Hippy Chick]

AF Daily - Saturday 4/23

Morning all.

Just getting my daily dose of MWO early so I can get out into the garden again.

Thanks for all your suggestions about the issue with my husband. I suppose the obvious thing is to talk to him about it (my most un-favourite thing..... talking to a real person, you lot are OK cause your not real! :H ). The main problem is he doesnt want me to stop drinking. He says I am not the person he fell in love with when I am not drinking. That makes me sad that i become someone so different that even my husband doesnt know me.

Cassia - I agree with you. This place is so full of unconditional love and help for virtual strangers that it amazes me. Initially I was very skeptical of trusting what is said here (typical me, dont trust anyone or anything.... my issues, not that I actually felt people here were nothing but genuine), but in the last year and a bit I have let go of any feelings I had of not letting anyone in or trusting what is said. It was a relief to finally believe in people and realise that there are people who are not trying to trick me or lie to me. I am so glad I found this community.

Doggy - I read alot about people here doing mandala's so I googled it as I missed the initial post describing them. I found a website that you can download free ones to colour in. Although I dont have my laptop connected to a printer, I emailed it to another computer print out later. My daughter wanted "girltime" last night so we did our own mandala. We got the scone cutters out of the kitchen drawer to use the different size circles and sat for hours doing different designs. It was rather relaxing.

Lav - how is your new grandbaby settling in? I just love babies - luckily I was sober for the first five years of my son's life and two years for my daughter so I do remember their babyhood.

Well my coffee is gone and the garden beckons......

Hip

[Sarasmiles]

AF Daily - Saturday 4/23

Hi Everyone,

I haven't been able to visit MWO much, since I'm on vacation with the family, have limited internet access and limited privacy. I've had some thoughts of wanting to drink...mostly around the "cocktail hour" when others are starting to pour the white wine and mix tropical drinks. I feel a little sorry for myself, I guess. But I also accept, without a doubt, that I have a different kind of brain...for whatever reason, my brain does not handle alcohol well. Since there is absolutely no room for doubt for me, I can push through the moments of cravings or temptations. Has anyone else read "Beyond the Influence"? It's been really helpful to me, for reinforcing my understanding that and belief that alcoholism is not just about our behavior. We are not just "badly behaved" when it comes to booze...if we think that, then we think we can change it, and still drink. The book purports that when we have alcoholism, we just can't drink. I finally believe it.

Must run...Be well, everyone!!

Sara

[Doggygirl]

AF Daily - Saturday 4/23

Hi again fABbies!

Cassia, thank YOU for being such a wonderful addition to our little support group here!

My life, I too am looking forward to cuddling down. Very soon in fact! BBQ sounds good!

HC, your post reminded me of what one of my girlfriends said at AA this morning. She was talking about the time when she finally just accepted and knew that she is alcoholic and wanted to seek treatment. She had been struggling for years and all sorts of consequences, etc. Her husband just said "you don't need to quit you just need to slow down a bit." She said "he didn't want to lose his drinking buddy." This was 7 years ago and they are still together and have worked it out. She often talks about times when he just doesn't understand. People who are not alcoholics really CAN'T understand 100% what it is like for us. But....it seems that so long as my friend has an outlet for talking with people who DO understand, she is also able to work things out at home in a way that is acceptable for her, and apparently for her husband too. I hope it works out that way for you. Just wanted you to know that lots of other people go through this and there is hope!!!!!!

Using the stuff you used to make your own mandalas sounds WAY cool!!! I want to try that sometime!

Sara, good to see you! Hang in there. I don't believe AT ALL that alcoholism stems from bad behavior. I truly believe that our bodies (brains?) react differently to alcohol than what is true for a non-alcoholic. I know I have alcoholism and I just can't drink either. Period. And life is OK. Better in fact, now that I have accepted that. Soak up a few rays on the beach for me, OK?

Nighty night all. May the Easter Bunny bring you all something fABulous! One thing is for sure...

DG

[Lavande]

AF Daily - Saturday 4/23

End of the day but wanted to say hello & Happy Easter

Purchased my gazebo today, YB will be back tomorrow to get it installed & secured to the deck. He's extremely cooperative lately, don't know why but I'm not complaining!

Grateful for another AF day, another AF holiday & most of all grateful to be enjoying 3 grandbabies AF :l Things could be very different for me right now if I had not made the decision to pull the plug on my drinking when I did. I'm not missing a darn thing

Sara, hang in there & enjoy your AF vacation. You'll be glad you did, I promise!

Have a good night one & all!
Lav