Weekly AA Thread - Apr. 25 - May 1

[retteacher]

Many of the members of last night's BB meeting spoke about this being their first Easter holiday sober. There was so much gratitude in the room...it was heart-warming. We thought the holiday would be so much "jollier" if we drank, but it turned out otherwise for most of us...if not all of us.

As for me, we went to our daughter & ate a big dinner, played Scrabble, & had fun w/the kids. I made sure I got home in enough time to get to my meeting (priorities!). Nice time.

Mary

[Doggygirl]

Weekly AA Thread - Apr. 25 - May 1

Hi Mary. For the last many years of my drinking, my drinking definitely didn't end up making things jollier. The usual pattern was that I would start drinking very early in the day - always telling myself I would have "one now, then stop until later. Well, the stopping never happened. So I would either be drunk and embarrassing myself by the time any actual family stuff was going on, or I would "call in sick" and miss the family stuff entirely. I never ended up feeling "jolly" about any of that.

If I drank again, that's where I would end up again in time. So I think I will stay away from AL today.

Thanks for starting us off Mary and your afternoon with family sounds like it was nice!

DG

[retteacher]

Weekly AA Thread - Apr. 25 - May 1

I hear so many relapsers say that they thought they could drink moderately. However, after a very few days, they right back to ridiculous levels. That is not for me. Mary

[Kimberley]

Weekly AA Thread - Apr. 25 - May 1

Hey all and happy easter. Just found out I am doing my first chair tonight. Yipes!! Wish me luck!

K x

[Doggygirl]

Weekly AA Thread - Apr. 25 - May 1

:yougo: Good luck Kimberly! Can't wait to hear about it. I think you will enjoy the experience.

DG

[retteacher]

Weekly AA Thread - Apr. 25 - May 1

kimberly: Good luck. I know you'll do well. M

[Newgrange]

Weekly AA Thread - Apr. 25 - May 1

This is my first Easter AF. I cannot remember the last Easter Sunday that I did not drink. Even though many at our table drank wine I was content with my water and there was no pressure which was great. I enjoyed the day and reflected in the middle of the meal that so many times previously I would have a large hangover the next day. No alcohol and no hang over.

So true Mary. My downfall was thinking I could moderate but it just led to relapse so I can't go there again but one day at a time.

I agree DG about missing out on things. It is great to be fully present at events.

Good luck Kimberly.

[retteacher]

Weekly AA Thread - Apr. 25 - May 1

Missing out on things:
-Going to plays & not remembering anything the next day.
-Going to my neice's wedding & getting violently ill.
-Going to special dinners at friend's homes & getting too drunk to eat most of the meal.
-Having the g-sons over & getting drunk & wishing I was anywhere else.
-Ruining a family reunion...leaving early.
-etc.

There are too many to count. I must not forget, lest i think that 2 sober years makes it safe to drink again. The absolute unlikeliest people can easily relapse.

Every time I have a sober hoiday, celebration, party, etc. & don't drink (when in the past I did drink), it feels like another hurtle I've gotten over. All those old drinking associations are being replaced w/sober ones.

Mary

[Doggygirl]

Weekly AA Thread - Apr. 25 - May 1

Newgrange, congrats on your first sober Easter! I really love those "firsts" and building a new foundation for my life.

Mary - it really is humbling to realize that relapse can happen to people with years of sobriety. I don't want that to be me. Daily actions making sobriety my first order of business is all I can think to do. That is what I see the people doing who are sober for many years and who are living the kind of life I want to be living today, and hopefully many years from now.

DG

[Doggygirl]

Weekly AA Thread - Apr. 25 - May 1

I love today's Hazelden thought for the day:

Fear of Giving

It is often the fear of rejection that makes us afraid to give of ourselves. The person who is reluctant to share at a meeting may be holding back because of this fear. To share is to reveal who we are and where we are. If we feel inadequate, we do not want to expose this imagined inadequacy to other people.

If our self-image is too grand and inflated, we cannot possibly live up to it in reality. Expecting ourselves to be perfect sets us up for frustration and fear, since we know deep down that we do not measure up to our image of perfection.

With humility comes the willingness to give of what we have and what we are right now, without waiting until we are more eloquent or more accomplished. What we have to share is what someone else needs to receive. By focusing more on the needs of others and less on the imaginary concept of ourselves, which is our ego, we learn to overcome our fear of giving. What we have to give now is enough for today.

May I not be afraid to give.

Kimberly, when I read your post earlier, I thought about how nervous I was when I chaired a meeting the first time. AA presents us with so many wonderful learning and growth opportunities. I know that your willingness to give what you have and chair (like Mary's willingness to give what she has when she was speaker) will help someone!

This reading makes me think about the most humble people I have met in AA. They are to me, the great ones. That kind of humility is something I desire. I am willing to work on it.

DG

[Kimberley]

Weekly AA Thread - Apr. 25 - May 1

Hey all,

Well the meeting went really well. The chair was sprung on me so I only had an hour or so to try to get my story straight in my head. I didn't want to plan it, but just to try to recall some kind of timeline of things so that I didn't miss anything important out or freeze up forgetting what came next. I was really nervous sitting there beforehand but as soon as I got going I was fine. I was totally honest about the past and ended by saying what AA has done for me in only a short time.

Afterwards i felt great - it was so good hearing people share back, relating to my story, and also saying about how they had seen me change. The guy who was doing the chair at my first meeting shared back as well, saying he had a tear in his eye hearing me now. He hardly ever shares so it was extra special.

I had told myself beforehand that actually it didn't matter if the chair was a bit rubbish, as it was just important that I was DOING it. But it was really nice that it actually went so well

DG your Thought for the day has a lot of resonance for me. I am glad I am getting better at not being scared to give!

K x

[retteacher]

Weekly AA Thread - Apr. 25 - May 1

Kimberly: I'm so happy for you. Sharing your story is so important. I'm absolutely sure there was someone listening whose lives were changed as a result of listening to you. I'm so proud of you. Mary

[Doggygirl]

Weekly AA Thread - Apr. 25 - May 1

Kimberly, I got a tear in my eye too just reading about your chairing! Your mention of people noting how they have seen you change...we have all had the wonderful joy of watching you change too! And it's a beautiful thing. For me, one of the gifts of AA is seeing a newcomer come out of the depths of active alcoholism and begin to blossom as a person. That is what keeps AA totally fresh for me.

Alcoholism is such a tough disease (or affliction or whatever term people like to use). There is no way out that seems to work for everyone. Not AA, not MWO, not any of the others. But as long as any of these programs help someone, then they are worth while. I am always sad for the ones who leave and never come back. But what keeps me coming back are the ones who make it. There is just so much joy in that to be shared.

Happy Tuesday one and all!

DG

[cpn1004]

Weekly AA Thread - Apr. 25 - May 1

Great start to the week y'all. Love "seeing" everyone here.

[retteacher]

Weekly AA Thread - Apr. 25 - May 1

I just got back from the supermarket & saw someone who was in the rooms a few months back. I haven't seen him in a while. Either he didn't recognize me or didn't want to interact...I think sometimes people feel a lot of shame when they relapse. I've only seen "welcome back" when people come back to the rooms. I hope he does. M