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AF Daily Tuesday 3rd May

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    AF Daily Tuesday 3rd May

    Hello fellow abbers.

    Thought I would start the day off today. Hope you are all staying strong and fighting the beast.

    I had a huge step in my recovery yesterday. I finally got to see a clinical psychologist. I walked out of his office on cloud 9.... finally someone who understands what I am going thru, someone who doesnt think I am going mad, someone who doesnt think I am "putting it on". And someone who can help me!! It felt so good to start to open up and discuss alot of what has happened in my life.
    He thinks I may be agrophobic as well as being extremely anxious. It is such a relief to have a name and explaination for what I feel. I am really excited to start finally healing and learning how to live minus the AL. I want to be able to live without having to use anything, without having to avoid things because it is too hard, to be able to finally stop panicing when I am out of the house and enjoying myself instead.

    I am so excited and cant wait for my next session (which is good for me as I usually dread things like that!!).

    Have a great day/night. I am off to soccer training with my daughter.

    Hippy
    I finally got it!
    "All that we are is the result of what we have thought. The mind is everything. What we think, we become" Buddah

    #2
    AF Daily Tuesday 3rd May

    Hi Hippy Chick and all to come,

    Good for you for seeing a psychologist for help. I had counselling with an addiction specialist and found it very useful. I'm glad to hear it's helping you.

    I had a lovely weekend at the seaside with my GF and we squeezed in a 10K charity walk while we there so felt quite virtuous! We went out for dinner on Sunday night to a lovely Indian restaurant and they kept bringing us little tasters of things between courses - a little cup of spicy soup, some nibbles etc and then a little shot glass of something and I didn't hear what the waiter said it was before he walked away. I sniffed it and it smelt of fruit so I was just about to try it and my girlfriend took a sip of hers and said "It's got vodka in it", so she had mine as well. A close shave! I suppose restaurants always think alcohol is a "treat" and don't make sure that people can drink it. I don't suppose it would have sent me on a rampage if I had drunk it but I'm glad my girlfriend is vigilant on my behalf.

    I'm off work today and might have a pedicure to give my feet a treat after the walk.

    Have a good day abbers!
    sigpic
    AF since December 22nd 2008
    Real change is difficult, and slow, and messy - Oliver Burkeman

    Comment


      #3
      AF Daily Tuesday 3rd May

      morning all - last dya of holidays today and back to work tomorrow - I feel so relaxed.
      I am off to get my gardening bits,maybe get my brows threaded and then off to gym/spa.
      Have a counselling appointment later at 7pm, then home for a bubble bath and TV.

      I have cut out red meat for a week so far - feel better for it already - I am eating chicken,turkey and fish,quite a bit of quorn and upping my fruit and veg intake. I haven't lost any weight this week but stayed the same - not bad for a week of many takeaways due to kitchen being out of action for 4 days.

      I feel so good - it's lovely weather and I have no desire to smoke or drink - I will get cravings I know and need to be vigilant BUT today I really feel like I am looking after myself properly.
      one day at a time

      Comment


        #4
        AF Daily Tuesday 3rd May

        Morning everyone,

        Hippy - I am so happy for you that you have found someone who understands and who will listen to you. You sound very upbeat and positive!

        Marshy - I'm surprised too that a restaurant would put an alcohol drink down in front of you without telling you - just sounds totally wrong on all counts to do this. It would not have been the end of the world if you had taken a drink but I know you are glad that you didn't. Nice to have a GF who is a true friend and willing to step in and help you.

        Bear - just curious - I've seen people getting their brows "threaded" - what does it feel like? I dread going to get mine waxed but it's just something I've gotta do every month or so.

        have a great day everyone!
        Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.

        Comment


          #5
          AF Daily Tuesday 3rd May

          Morning guys! Day 8 here and feeling good. I love being sober and am glad I made it past the dreaded 4 day mark. The 7 months I was sober before my relapse felt so great. I can't wait to get back there. DG, I hear ya, it is hard to get back once you relapse.

          Had a great night last night with my daughter, laughing and playing. Loved every second of it.

          Today will be a quiet day, rainy and miserable. I will do some inside work and relax, maybe have a bath, nap, etc.

          I hope everyone has a great AF Tuesday!
          Every day is a day to start over and remember that I am powerless over my addiction. I will no longer give the BEAST any power over me - he can go straight to hell.
          :h

          Comment


            #6
            AF Daily Tuesday 3rd May

            threading about as painful as waxing but a bit slower - better for sensitive skin though rather than waxing which always brings me out in a rash
            one day at a time

            Comment


              #7
              AF Daily Tuesday 3rd May

              It all sounds rather barbaric to me..... lucky my brows are fair enough not to have to worry about!!
              I finally got it!
              "All that we are is the result of what we have thought. The mind is everything. What we think, we become" Buddah

              Comment


                #8
                AF Daily Tuesday 3rd May

                Hello friends,

                Just a quick check in from me to let you know I am alive and well, sober too. It hasn't been as hard as I thought to keep from turning to any substances to get me through the grief. Plenty of food and sugar, because it's been all around me though.

                Terry's service was nice. We dressed up the tiny church with some of her quilts and paintings, and the flowers were beautiful. It looked great--she would have loved it! A lot of friends and family came as well. I put together a slide show and it turned out really well.

                I'm really glad she is in a better place and not living with the sickness anymore, but somehow that doesn't help as much as it should with the pain. There is another pretty big hole in my heart that only time will heal I guess. I feel really bad for my BIL too. He is going to miss her so much.

                Anyway, I have a lot of work to catch up on. I'm going to my son's track meet today with my best friend (whose husband has cancer) and the weather looks to be nice and warm and sunny! Whoo hoo!

                Sorry I haven't had time to catch up on the thread for awhile. Hope everyone is sober and doing well. :h
                _______________
                NF since June 1, 2008
                AF since September 28, 2008
                DrunkFree since June 1, 2008
                _____________
                :wings: In memory of MDbiker aka Bear.
                5/4/2010 In loving memory of MaryAnne. I pray you've found peace my friend.
                _______________
                The will of God will never take you where the Grace of God will not protect you.ray:

                Comment


                  #9
                  AF Daily Tuesday 3rd May

                  OMG! LVT! I did not know that Terry had passed! I haven't been around much in the last month. I am soooo sorry for your loss, sweetie!! Big, big, big, hugs to you. xoxo

                  I am just about to get into the shower and get ready for work. Working out of the house today. Nice change of scenery. Funny thing about mostly working from home is I notice that isolation is not great and makes me feel funny when I have to be in public with lots of people. Kind of like some sort of anxiety and overwhelming comes over me. Need to get out more amongst people a bit more regularly.

                  OK, well everyone have a nice day! xoxo

                  Comment


                    #10
                    AF Daily Tuesday 3rd May

                    Hi fABbies!!

                    HC - so happy for you that you found a therapist you like, and think you can progress with! That is such awesome news!

                    Marshy - you and XNGF are world travelers it seems! Sounds like a fun weekend.

                    Jolie, I think I'm old fashioned. I still just pluck a few every day.

                    Uni, congrats on Day 8. You sound so good. Remembering how difficult it was for me to get back on the wagon after relapse has saved me more than once from doing something really stupid "in the moment." Hope that continues to be a detterent for both of us!

                    Bear, you sound really good too! So good to read. I am getting the itch to start gardening and making flower pots. But it is supposed to frost tonight so I resisted the urge. I bought a bunch of new pots and hanging baskets on sale instead.

                    (((LVT))) Just hugs and more hugs to you our friend. I can't even imagine what this must be like for you and BIL and the rest of your family...

                    AFM, I get really funky if I stay in too long too. I am also in a home office. I always get excited when I see a few day window where I don't "have" to go anywhere. But if I stay in for more than a day I just start getting in a funk. I always think staying in is what I "need" but it never, ever is.

                    That said...I'm trying to pull out of a funk myself. I'm sure sugar withdrawl has something to do with it. This too shall pass, and I'm determined to get rid of the sugar monster for good!!!

                    One thing is for sure...booze is out and it ain't comin' back in.

                    DG
                    Sobriety Date = 5/22/08
                    Nicotine Free Date = 2/27/07


                    One day at a time.

                    Comment


                      #11
                      AF Daily Tuesday 3rd May

                      Hello Abbers!

                      Found myself strangely feeling bored this morning -
                      not sure where that came from, I'm usually too preoccupied. So I hopped in the car, took a little ride, stopped & picked up a pot of red petunias & something for dinner. My daughter & Lily will be coming over to keep me company soon. I think that's the problem with me, chronic lonliness. Had it going on for many years after the kids left home, YB ignoring me - the usual boo hoo BS. I'm sure that was a big part of my drinking - trying to numb the lonely feeling but I will not go there again!!!

                      Hippy, I'm glad you're happy! Finding the right person to talk to about problems & concerns is big.

                      Greetings Marshy, bear & Jolie!
                      I have to tell you at my (real) age, my eyebrows don't grow anymore......blessing

                      Hi Uni & AFM!

                      LVT, I've been thinking about you, hope you are OK:l

                      DG, since I work from home & already feel isolated living here in 'cow country' I guess days like today are just going to happen. Getting in the car & escaping for an hour or two helps

                      I hope everyone has a good afternoon.
                      Where's Papmom???
                      AF since 03/26/09
                      NF since 05/19/09
                      Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

                      Comment


                        #12
                        AF Daily Tuesday 3rd May

                        Hi all, just checking in. Still on track.

                        Hi hippy chick, delighted you have found a psychologist you can talk to.
                        Well done marshy on the 10k
                        Bear I only eat red meat every 10 days or so and like you feel healthier.
                        Hi jolly. There the iPad goes again correcting spellings, Jolie
                        Hope you enjoyed your bath universal and well done on AF.
                        Lvt it sounds like you made Terry's funeral so special with slide show. Thinking of you.
                        Hi accountable for me.
                        Doggy girl. Well done on reducing sugar. I am starting on Friday but will reduce it rather than give it up. I would be too cranky if I gave it up completely.
                        Hi Lavande. Sorry you are a bit blue, really get what you are saying today.

                        Hello to everyone else.

                        Things going ok, still hanging in. Hit a few rough spots but determined.

                        Really enjoying Paul McKenna cd. It is really helping to reduce stress.

                        Comment


                          #13
                          AF Daily Tuesday 3rd May

                          I'm here I'm here! Never fear!
                          Holy Crap batman you will never believe the weekend and Monday I have had! I had to go to work today just to catch my breath!!
                          Friday's interveiw went ok I guess. So hard to tell. I still haven't heard anything from them in terms of an offer so I continue to wait. The other job called on Monday, said I was their choice but no offer until references could be checked. Didn't know the salary either or wouldn't say. so far none of my references have been called yet .
                          The agility trial started off rocky on Saturday. I left at Silly O'clock Sat. morning and was still drained from the interview, packing and cleaning.
                          I was not a very good handler on the course for the first 2 runs but redeemed myself for the last 2 of the day. The weather was really wierd too. Sunday was as perfect a day as you could ask for. Blue cloudless sky, warm but with a cooling breeze. We ran great runs and Q'd in all 4 with 2 firsts and 2 second places. Got home about 5, exhausted and didn't turn on the puter until about 8. Read all your posts but too tired to respond. Saw I had a PM on FB and it was from my Maine agility/pap friend. She had gone to a different trial on the way home saw a small camper by the side of the road. Got home, checked CL and yep, it was there. Emailed the seller to see if still available then PM'd me. I called the seller, liked what I heard. Made arrangements for my friend to go look at the camper on Monday as it was right down the road from her. Did research on the weight and it's perfect. She looked at it, shot some video and I made an offer for $400 less than asking which was accepted. It needs new wheels and tires as far as we can tell and hopefully nothing else major. My friend will take it across the street to the RV place to get the repairs done for me and I pick it up in a couple of weeks!! Here she is!!

                          Play-Mor_1500 pictures by pamh35 - Photobucket

                          I'm so excited and can't believe how it all came about and in just a matter of a day!! I also can't believe how cool and calm I was with the price negotiation. No way could I have been successful had I still been drinking!! It was just awesome!!

                          So thats my news!
                          New Birthday: May 8, 2010

                          "Because dwelling from, not upon, the space you want to inherit is the fastest way to change absolutely everything."[/i]-The Universe

                          KO the Beast!!

                          Comment


                            #14
                            AF Daily Tuesday 3rd May

                            whew, better late than never

                            nice trailer Papmom!

                            Red meat is a complex subject. the nutritional difference between common store bought corn fed beef and organic grass fed beef is amazing. the chemical composition is strikingly different. the fat from grass fed beef contains high levels of Omega-3's and very high doses of CLA's (conjugated linolenic acid) which is a potent cancer-fighter. I eat all the grass fed beef I can afford. it's expensive, but cutting out AL, sugar and other crap has saved me some dough.
                            The Differences Between Grass-Fed Beef and Grain-Fed Beef | Mark's Daily Apple


                            I'm going to have a hell of a couple days coming up. tomorrow working until approx midnight, then staying in a hotel, then driving home in the morn and catching a flight to Colorado and probably won't even have time to stop home to see my love. zoom zoom.
                            I'll be doing it AF at any rate.
                            be well everyone
                            nosce te ipsum
                            (Know Thyself)

                            Comment


                              #15
                              AF Daily Tuesday 3rd May

                              P3!!! :yougo::yougo: How exciting about the camper!!! Of course the blue and white checks can easily be changed to pink and white checks. Congrats also on your agility success. Mr. Doggy is trialing this weekend once again hoping for Schutzhund 1. It is SOOO MUCH to get right in order to pass all that in one weekend. Fergie is SUCH a good tracker (but a bit of a pussy in the protection work). We are hoping he passes - even barely - so they can then go on and work on more advanced tracking titles - that's what this dog is really good at.

                              Hi Deter! I'm so glad we got a deep freeze and got in the annual groove of getting some butchered grass feed beef from a local farmer. We love it. It is totally different than commercially raised beef. Very lean and different taste (to me) but really good. A farmer doesn't even have to be that close if you are only picking up once a year!

                              Newgrange, I need to google Paul McKenna. (I seem to recall that name - I'm sure from people here talking about it! )

                              Lav, glad your road trip helped!!

                              Off to look for or start todays thread...

                              DG
                              Sobriety Date = 5/22/08
                              Nicotine Free Date = 2/27/07


                              One day at a time.

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