AF Daily - Thursday May 5

[Lavande]

Hello Hello Abbers!

Is everyone being lazy today like me? :H
Just getting a slow start because I know I will be running after EB later - saving up my energy :H

Wishing everyone a good AF Thursday

Lav

[Doggygirl]

AF Daily - Thursday May 5

Good morning Lav! Where the sam hill (who is sam hill anyway???) are all the other fABbies today???? Hope you have a fABulous afternoon with EB.

Kaslo, I was just reading your intro. Good for you seeing that downhill slide going on before it slid any further, and doing something about it! Sounds like you do very interesting work. I hope you stick around and tell us a bit about your projects from time to time!

Alcohol is toxic to our bodies. A little bit is. A lot certainly is. I have had reason to think about this a bit lately, and if something happened where I WAS able to safely drink (meaning I truly had a choice about drinking and stopping) I still would not drink. I'm actually very happy that circumstances promted me to think that through. There was a time when my secret wish ABSOLUTELY was to drink safely!! If I would have heard of a way, I would have been the first in line! I am so grateful to be in this place in my AF life today, where I just don't want it in my life. It's a poison. It caused me nothing but heartache and trouble. There are about 9 trillion other ways to "have fun." (drinking stopped being "fun" a long time ago anyway!!) For me, drinking was lazy man's fun. Didn't have to think or work for it or earn it. Just sit on my ass and drink. That is just no longer my idea of fun.

Anyway...off that soap box. G-man, I noticed your comment that some of us ladies on this thread "walk the talk" re: hump day. I will just point out it has nothing whatsoever to do with "walking." :h

Cinco de Mayo is Mr. Doggy's birthday. I got him a big bouquet of spring flowers.

We had internet troubles this morning keeping me off line until now. I'm really glad I had the oppotunity to check in before I leave to visit with Dad. You guys help me stay grounded. I am so glad that people shared on yesterday's thread their experiences losing parents. It was a healthy reminder that this is the natural order of life. I just hope he doesn't have to suffer a lot longer. We just don't know. Something important like his heart could give out tomorrow, or he could keep barely chugging along with a shadow of a life for a long time. Just have to take it one day at a time.

I'm glad I am able to help Mom today. She has really been a trooper over the last several years with this - and especially the last few months. Her singing group has a performance today. So I told her I would stay with Dad so she could go enjoy a little time doing something for herself. I hope my Dad is not a complete grump about it.

gotta zoom zoom. Thank you all for being here. Thank you for sharing your pieces of your AF world with me. We don't have to drink to have fun, to be happy, to be sad, to experience new life, to experience death. We don't need AL or for anyone struggling, we don't want AL. That is such a blessing.

One thing is for sure....

DG

[papmom3]

AF Daily - Thursday May 5

((((DG))))-more later!!

[mylife]

AF Daily - Thursday May 5

Hello Abbers,

Just checking in to say good afternoon.

DG, you are right - alcohol is so toxic. The farther I get from it the more I'm puzzled by why I would pour poison into my own body on a daily basis...?? Anyway, I'm here and happy to be AF.

I have to say the thoughts of AL are getting more and more distant so I guess it's true that it gets easier as time goes on! But I know, I need to keep up my guard. !!

Hope you all have a wonderful AF day.

[universal]

AF Daily - Thursday May 5

Hi guys, I missed yesterday about losing parents but I will go back and look. My mom's death sent me into a horrible spiral of alcoholism, depression and panic disorder.

I was at a conference today about concurrent disorders being the expectation not the exception. It was really good but it triggered me huge. I managed not to drink but I did take more of my clonazepam than usual to keep me going. I went over the doctors dose which is not normal for me but I did need to get through the day. Not proud of it but at least I didn't drink.

Yesterday's grief seminar was amazing - so glad I went - helped a lot.

Love and hugs,

Uni

[universal]

AF Daily - Thursday May 5

Just read yesterday's thread - it is so hard, grief is such a personal thing and i think what we all have to remember is that it is OUR grief. No one can tell us we "should be over it" or "time has gone by". It is OUR grief and we will deal with it how we need to and in our own time.

I lost my mom, my marriage and had a baby within a 2 month span. That was hard. That's when I started drinking hard. And then when I decided to quit drinking and came on this site my best friend of 30 years suddenly died of a lung pulmonary emobolism. She was 34, had a 3 month old baby. We have all had our share of grief - how we deal with it is the key. And we have to remember the secondary grief as well - losing my mom also meant losing the close relationship with her family - she was the glue. Losing Kathryn also meant losing a lot of friends - she was the glue. Sadly it happens. It is up to us to deal with it. In our own time, the way we can, with lots of support. Don't ever let anyone tell you your grieving time should be done. Fuck them.We all grieve our own way.

[Newgrange]

AF Daily - Thursday May 5

hi All,
DG thinking of you and hoping your dad will not suffer for much longer. My Father in law is in his last days. He lived a wonderful full life but it is not easy and very soon after my mothers passing but they lived life well and I am grateful for that. Universal how sad you lost your mother at a young age and especially so soon after giving birth and your marriage as well and your dear friend too. My heart goes out to you. They are huge losses to bear. Glad the grief seminar went well.

DG i agree that Alcohol is so toxic to our bodies. I developed a serious skin condition due to my excessive alcohol intake. It was very serious, self inflicted and now cured as the toxin is out of my system. It will return if I drink again so another reason to stay AF. Skin conditions and excessive alcohol intake are related.

Went out for a meal tonight, the last time I was there I cannot remember much about it. It felt so good to be sober. Drove everyone home.

Hi lav, my life, papmom and all here today.

[Jolie]

AF Daily - Thursday May 5

Hi everyone,

Lav - hope you had fun with your grandson today - it turned out to be pretty nice out this afternoon.

DG - that was a very interesting box you were on and so so true. It is poison and it's a shame that it is so glamorized when it leads so many of us to pain and heartache. You are a wonderful daughter that you can relieve your mom and give her some time to herself. Anyone who has been thru it knows how all-consuming it is to care for an elderly husband/parent/loved one.

Mylife - I agree - thoughts of AL are getting more and more distant. That is good - letting down our guard is not and I too need to be aware of that at all times.

Uni - you've had it rough - so much to deal with all at the same time. Your baby had to be such a blessing though when everything else seemed to be going badly. Good for you in not giving in to that urge. Be proud of yourself!

Newgrange - I had never heard about the skin condition and alcohol use. I must have been lucky cause it never happened to me but I can imagine it was very hard to deal with.

Papmom - you checkin back in?

One of my co-workers has been invited to another co-workers little happy hour (she's getting married in a couple of weeks). In talking to my first co-worker, she admitted that she isn't a drinker and doesn't really like the bar scene. We made a plan to make an appearance but neither of us plan on staying long and we aren't going to be drinking anything alcoholic. Feels good to share this plan with someone even though she doesn't know my past.

Hope everyone has a great night - tomorrow is Friday - Wohoo!

[Sarasmiles]

AF Daily - Thursday May 5

Hello Abbers,
Just wanted to check in. I've been crazy busy with the kids and work and exercise. It's Little League baseball season, and with three boys playing and practicing, I'm living at the field. There are parents who "tail gate" at these games! I'm so glad not to be one of them. It seems completely inappropriate to me!

It's been 95 days since I've had a drink, and 10 days without refined sugar! I don't miss either one.

Sending good wishes to all!
Sara

[Kaslo]

AF Daily - Thursday May 5

What a nice bunch of people you are! I am back in my hotel room after spending the day traversing the landscape near two industrial sites, in amongst the trees and spring snow in the Rocky Mountain foothills (north east flank). I was looking for injury to indicator plants from two exposures, and I found only mild symptoms. I was out there with my daughter, who is 20 and working for my company as a junior biologist. She did well. We had a great day, we had dinner in the little restaurant in town. I was not even tempted, and didnt even really think of it till later. With a kind of hmmmph, whadya know? feeling. So yes, DG, I seem to have seen the slippery slope dropping off in front of me, and avoided it, but there was a time about 15 years ago when I was definetely over the top with the booze consumption. Switching from moderation to Not-eration was easy, but it was not ever thus. I tried to quit back then too, and I was not very successful. I thank my lucky stars I managed to survive that hellish time in my life, and I am glad to be among you Ab'rs.

I am no stranger to grief, either. Lost a dear sister, in 81, her birthday was yesterday. Both parents gone now. Friends as well. Walk a mile in our shoes, I say.

But on a positive note, I had a great day, even though I was dog tired from no sleep worrying about one of the sites today. Blue sky, lots of birds, trembling aspen, water falls on the river, saw a black bear! Tomorrow I go to another site very far from here, a days drive actually . Just to see how its done over winter.