AF daily - Monday, July 4th

[Marshy]

Hello abbers!

Lav - re introducing the new chickens: I have no idea if this is true or not but I read that if you put the new chicken into the coop at night when all the others are asleep, they wake up in the morning and think that the foreign chicken was there all the time so there are no problems! Disclaimer: I am not a chicken farmer :H

Kaslo - I'm also in a male-dominated area (media) but the women tend to be very supportive of each other, and the attitude of the men has changed over the years too. I don't think most of them automatically assume that women can't do the job any more. Or maybe they do. :H I've had very good and very bad bosses of both sexes.

DG - any news on the condom tin?

Papmom - did the gardeners arrive?

LVT - there are probably people at the bar with alcohol problems too who wish they could give up. You're not a fuddy duddy!

Loppy - I don't remember the tiredness but I did read the other day that's it's a withdrawal symptom, along with insomnia (god, I remember that) so should sort itself out in time.

Det - when I read that you're frustrated about the car and home alone, I thought "uh oh". I hope you have your coping strategies in place and your AF batsuit on!

Mom3 - hope your back is feeling better today.

Happy 4th July to those who celebrate. Statue of Ronald Reagan being unveiled in London today

I'm now off work for three weeks, going on hols on Wednesday. Tiny improvement in mum's condition but it's very slow progress and my dad sounded quite despondent when I spoke to him last night. But my sister went to visit yesterday and she told me mum seems a bit more with it. I suppose because my dad's there all the time he doesn't necessarily notice small improvements but people who haven't seen her for a few days do. Anyway, there's a long way to go but I feel slightly better about going away having spoken to my sister.

Hot here. Going to get a few bits for holiday (sun lotion, sunglasses, mosquito repellent :H) then going to see Bridesmaids with GF later.

Have a good day all!

[mario]

AF daily - Monday, July 4th

Hi marshy, long time no talk :-)

I am just copping on that the weekly abstinence thread starts a new every week.;-)

[Guitarista]

AF daily - Monday, July 4th

Morning Marshy, Mario, and Fabber's far and wide!

Best wishes to your folk's Marshy, and great stuff on the holiday's. Think i'll do the same real soon. I'm a muso primarily, but i also work as a community health outreach worker a few days a week, which i love. Lot's of women in the gig. All of my bosses are chick's, and my immediate 2 bosses are flexible, respectful, and fantastic, along with my team of 5/6 other's including one other bloke, which helps balance the dynamics a bit. I did consider erecting some chicken wire around my desk, but thought better of it......:H

Just on the off chance, anyone know where i can get a condom box? Been lookin for ages.....

Happy 4th of July to our American friend's!

Have a great week everyone.

[Doggygirl]

AF daily - Monday, July 4th

Good day fABbies!!!

Marshy, thanks for kicking things off for us today. You must be so excited vacation to Greece is almost here!!! So glad that your Mom is doing a bit better. How long will you be in Greece?

Hi Mario!!

Hi G! What sort of things are you doing these days in your community outreach work? That sounds interesting. I do, in fact, know where you can get a condom tin. It is still holding at $521 so a bid of $531 just might make it yours! :H

Hmmm..... talk of _____________ yesterday and then Mario and G-Man show up. Coincidence? Perhaps not. :H

P3 I can't believe you scrubbed your shower after all that gardening work. How many Activity Points are you giving yourself credit for? It would be a LOT in my world!

Det...:upset: As Marshy said - keep that AF batsuit on tight. THERE IS NO ALCOHOL IN YOUR HOUSE, RIGHT?????? If there is, I will first suggest you pour it all out now and then I will :b&d: you.

Kaz you are SO FUNNY. Sorry the canoe adventure did not yield much adrenaline pumping stuff like tip overs or getting stuck or whatever. I WANT TO HEAR THE SHOTGUN STORY!!!! Will this make you the Prairie Woman of MWO - Canada Edition????

Lav, it must be heartbreaking to see your young girls go through that!!!! It made me think of the pain of entering high school. That was me hanging from a rafter dangerously close to the ceiling fan. I hope the young girls fit in better when you try it again! Your new room sounds FABULOUS!!!!!! I hope you pick out some totally beautiful finishing touches after your furniture arrives. You deserve a little piece of heaven all your own!

M3 - so glad you were feeling up for a little walking. I hope it's even better today.

Hello to anyone I missed and all yet to come today!!!

I'm loving this holiday. Feels like it's been a long one just due to the timing and cancellation of regular business activities. I haven't had on any makeup or clothing other than shorts and tank tops in days. Feels like many many days. Life is good. 20 more hours in the condom tin bid. Still holding at $521. 18 official "watchers" so we will see what happens in the end. I still can't believe anyone would pay over $500 for a little condom tin and am still looking around with suspicion at all the people I see. :H

Our accountant finally sent me my year end journal entries a couple weeks ago. So I think I'm going to try to close 2010 in our accounting software system today. Wish me luck. This activity always makes me a little nervous.

Oh - yesterday P3 mentioned the Serenity Prayer as a tool. I really like that one and use it a lot myself. Another really great tool I picked up in AA is actually Step 10.

Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it

In the old days I used to spend a lot of time figuring out how anything that went wrong was somebody else's fault. Even if something was entirely my own mistake. Today I am more willing to look at any problem situation and see if I had some part in it - small or large. And where I have a part in a problem, I am more willing to admit my mistake and apologize where appropriate. And then move on. This helps keep me out of the "guilt and remorse" trap.

This stuff might seem so obvious to some people. But I was so twisted in my approach to things due to my highest priority - defending my drinking. I didn't want to admit my drinking was all wrong, or anything I did while drinking was all wrong, so I didn't want to admit to ANY wrong doing, EVER. And all of that stuff just festered inside of me contributing to the viscious cycle. It is so much easier now to just do my best to look at my actions and how they affect other people with honesty. Took me a while to see that though. With the help of AL I build a miserable prison for myself!

Anyway....that came to mind yesterday and I hope you guys don't mind that I expressed those thoughts here.

ONE THING IS FOR SURE.

DG

[momof3]

AF daily - Monday, July 4th

Good Morning All,

Wow, busy busy thread already.

Bean, I recall being VERY tired for 1 -2 weeks after I stopped drinking. I would just try to sneak naps in when I could. Then it went away.

Marshy, Happy to hear there's a little improvement in your mom. I can't imagine how hard this must be on your dad so I'm not at all surprised that he is depressed and out of sorts.

Back not feeling so good this morning. I remember turning in the middle of the night and feeling some pain. Shit.

DG. I love the quote about the pain....so true. The pain experienced from addiction has to come to a point where it is worse than the pain to quit. Makes me think that this is why it is so important not to enable others when they are drinking...we're taking away the pain that could motivate them to quit for good.

Det, I hope you are okay being stranded at home.

I can't respond to everyone's comments because there are so many topics (and very good) topics on AF Daily over the past few days...hard to remember them all.

M3

[Lavande]

AF daily - Monday, July 4th

Good morning Abbers!

Cloudy, hot & humid so far here today. Looks like some BBQs could be in trouble today. I didn't plan anything this year, everyone is busy elsewhere.

Marshy, I have read about introducing the new chickens into the flock at night & I will do that on my next attempt. This time I tried another suggested method of putting one of the grown hens in with the youngsters for 24 hrs then putting all of them back into the main population. Oh well
Glad to hear your Mom is showing some improvement ~ these things do take time.

Greetings mario & G!!!!

DG, I love my uniform of jeans & T shirt! What else would I wear handling the dirty jobs around here? :H
I seriously wish I could get a few people into 'taking personal inventory mode' around here. I agree with that approach 100%. I am currently having problems with some family members who just won't take ownership of their own problems........

Wishing everyone a terrific AF 4th!

Lav

[Doggygirl]

AF daily - Monday, July 4th

Lav, all you can do is keep your own side of the street clean. I know what you mean though - much easier said than done to let go of those frustrations with others. :yougo: for our work uniforms!

M3 - I love your point about enabling. Easing someone else's drinking pain is definitely not helpful in the long run. Your post really made that clear for me.

Det must be sleeping in. I wonder if he sleeps in AF Batsuit at night?

DG

[LVT25]

AF daily - Monday, July 4th

Hello friends,

It's looking to be plenty hot here today, so a quick check in before I head to the greenhouse that turns into an oven about noonish.

Thanks Marshy and all for the pep talks yesterday. I knew when I put the words "other people think" that it was stupid and I shouldn't care. I'm 29 years old for heaven's sake! I doubt they could care less really. Not sure, it doesn't matter. What I did do was take myself to the softball diamonds to catch the last game of a tourney to see if I would run into any of my friends there--I didn't but enjoyed it all the same. I called a friend I knew was in town because I saw her on the street Friday night, but she didn't hear me call to her, and then hubby ran into her at the bar. No answer, but when I stopped at the local quick stop for a beverage--here she came. We had a nice visit. She made the comment that the bar was so crowded and so loud it was almost impossible to visit! Then I went to the lake and visited with some friends for quite awhile and just relaxed. I also decided to quit talking about putting together my old softball team for a reunion and just do it. So I put the word out on facebook, and it will be so much fun if several can make it. We used to have so much fun together. We all drank a lot of beer too. I am looking forward to this. One of my 29 year old friends pointed out that it's hard to believe it could be 30 years since that team started--we must have been very young!:H

I'm so envious of you Marshy! 3 weeks off and a trip to Greece. I know it's a hard situation with your mom's health though--and your concern for your dad. Been there, done that, except my dad was sick too.:l
You know I loved Ronald Regan. I'm glad to hear the Londoners do too!

Mom3, my DH has been having back/hip issues. He's been to the chiropractor a few times, but he's frustrated with that. He thinks part of the problem is our bed. Everything I suggest he poo poo's. He's been looking at informercials and that worries me. All we need is a $200 piece of worthless promises sitting around.

Bean, and interesting point you brought up yesterday. Many years ago I was married to an alcoholic and I went to Al anon and then when he went to rehab I went to family treatment. I have regrets about even marrying the guy, but think it was meant to be because I learned SO MUCH about myself. I am very co-dependent and I think that is the case with a lot of people that love addicts. With him it didn't matter what I said or did, he was still going to drink, but I sure felt better once I learned it really wasn't my problem to fix.:l

Damn, Papmom! You are like the energizer bunny! Wouldn't you love to come to my house and help me renovate my yard?? (and then clean my bathroom?) Take it easy today, ok?

Hi and hugs to everyone else here!! I'd love to comment on all of your posts, but I really have to get busy. Have a great sober day all!:h

[Bean]

AF daily - Monday, July 4th

Hey Everyone

I like to check in here before I go to work but am often pushed for time to get everything else done before I head out. So apologies that I don't write much to individuals but I do read and enjoy all your newsy posts. A few things are jumping to mind:

I know Loppy has the opposite problem of tiredness but SO many people write about having insomnia. CalMag (liquid Calcium Magnesium) is an amazing remedy for insomnia. Lack of magnesium is also linked to anxiety and panic attacks. You can take a couple tbsp of the stuff at bedtime which helps for a great night sleep (I was amazed when I first took it, slept right through and woke up feeling refreshed and ready for the day). You can also take more of it, if for example going through a more than usually stressful time and it doesn't have harmful SEs. It's not the cheapest but well worth a shot if you are having sleep issues and want a natural alternative to meds.

I've been thinking too about how going AF or sobriety is a PROCESS. All too often I/we fall into black adn white thinking. We think that if we relapse after X days then we 'failed' and we forget to notice the steps we are making forward, even if they are tiny. Looking back on the year so far, I have had some slips and a week or two of the old 'bad' style drinking, but overall, have been AF for at least 4.5 months out of the 6. Maybe 5! Not bad, I don't think.

I sense a deepening acceptance in me lately that there is only one path ahead of me and that is the totally AF one but, still, early days. Today, I feel great, sun is out again, all is well and I am happy.
Hope you can all say the same!!
Bean

PS Marshy - hope you have a great hol. Have you thought of keeping a small notebook to monitor your mum's progress? I saw this being done recently for a stroke victim and it really helped to 'remember' that last visit she had smiled or looked 'more alert' etc. Anyone who visits can write in it. As above, sometimes we don't see the little steps forward that are being made.
PPS Bear - great to see you on here yesterday and keep checking in.

[Determinator]

AF daily - Monday, July 4th

it's a bird.....it's a plane......it's......

Garlic Man! (cape flapping in the wind.....cheesy 70's action music playing in the back ground)

I'm all good, thanks loves. still stranded at home but what the heck, getting a lot of rest my sweetie will be back today so all is right with the world.

Marshy I rather liked Reagan but not sure why his statue is being put up over there? probably just another Fedex shipping error. LOL

Bean, I'm loving your 'tude today. very resolute and thoughtful.

Lav, here's what you do: make matching T-shirts for all the chickens so they can see they're all on the same team. voila! they call me "the chicken whisperer" on my home planet.

ditto on the magnesium...it's good stuff.

M3, maybe some stretching yoga would help? dang. back pain just sucks. feel better!

arritey, off to check Ebay auctions and smash some garlic for breakfast

be well

[greeneyes]

AF daily - Monday, July 4th

Hey ho! Still on the clean-a-rama mission. How utterly mundane for the queen. :H

Marshy, glad your mother's a little better and you are going to Greece with a bit of peace of mind.

Bean, you're rocking!

Lav, envious of your "new room" and the chicken thing is discussed in "Eat, Love, Pray" when she appears at the ashram.

Caffeine is going to kick in any second and I better go make use of it. Hope I don't seem rude dropping in and not really conversing. But I'll have you know you are all charming, humorous, supportive, and fascinating.

Wondering how inchy and scottish lass are doing. You two out there?

Loppy, I'm sorry you were let down. That sort of thing is like betrayal and is painful. I'm loving the way you are working your way through things - it sounds like you're building a solid long-lasting foundation.

LVT, SWEEEET!! on your turn-around.

P3, I gotta check out this freecycle thing you do. Maybe someone will want to unload some doggie clippers.

Det, good jobbie staying in your AF suit!

M3, give your back some rest right? Right? Right?

:armsaround: 3 men on the thread!!

Hallllo, mario! The thread is a daily one - like the army.

Hi G! The talk about ________bring you around? :bigwink:

Kaslo, awesome little afternoon jaunt! Did you say Jaysus with a drumstick? fish... loaf of bread.... drumstick..... heh?:H


Caffeine is coursing - I'm outta here!

[Lavande]

AF daily - Monday, July 4th

Had nothing else to do this afternoon so I brought some stuff in from the garden. OMG - please come take zucchini & cucumbers off my hands :H
The zucchini, yellow squash and a cabbage or two from a neighbor are stuffed in the bottom of my refrig in the garage:



Way too many cucumbers



All we need is a bit of garlic & we have a feast :H

Hope everyone is having a good day!

[mylife]

AF daily - Monday, July 4th

:H:H !! That's great Lav!

Okay, there's zucchini bread, zucchini muffins, zucchini pancakes....:H:H

Have you ever made pickles? I'm jealous!

[Determinator]

AF daily - Monday, July 4th

yes! make pickles...what a good idea.

Mylife, good to see you

[Lavande]

AF daily - Monday, July 4th

I have made pickles in the past - I just hate the canning process..........
I started the cucumbers by seed & guess I planted too many little plants - you don't really think they're actually all going to make it :H

Looking up pickle recipes now :H